Equivocal Death (58 page)

case and sat down. She was wearing a stylish brown pantsuit that 17

Kate had never seen before.

18

“I thought you were in Chile,” Kate said.

19

Andrea shook her head.

20

“So where were you?” Kate asked finally, curiosity kicking in.

21

Andrea studied her freshly manicured hands, as if they might 22

hold the answer. Then she looked back at Kate. “Madeleine’s 23

death really spooked me. At first, I thought I’d get over it. That it 24

would take me a week or so. But after the memorial service, I real-25

ized that wouldn’t happen. I needed to get away, to figure out what 26

was going on. That’s why I took time off.”

27

Kate looked at her, disbelieving. “Why didn’t you just tell me 28

that?”

29

“I don’t know.” Andrea looked up. “Now I can see how strange 30

it seems. But at the time . . . I didn’t want to talk about it. I just 31

needed to clear my head. Brent and I started talking about the fu-32

ture. Where we are now and where we want to be. I realized that I 33

wasn’t sure anymore that this was the place for me. And then I 34 sh

started to get paranoid. I kept thinking about Marcia Weygand.

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A M Y G U T M A N

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How, once they found out she was job hunting, they had her work-2

ing around the clock on all these crappy assignments. Then when 3

the holidays came, she didn’t even get her bonus. I just didn’t want 4

to risk something like that. Please. Try to understand.”

5

Kate looked at Andrea, a sense of sadness welling up inside her.

6

The fact was, she did sort of understand. She didn’t want to, but 7

she did. For all their late-night camaraderie, she and Andrea had 8

never really been close friends, not in the way she and Tara were.

9

What they’d been was allies, comrades in a hard-fought campaign.

10

Members of the same battalion. But intimate friends? What did 11

she really know about Andrea? A few biographical facts. Her tastes 12

in sushi and Chinese food. The fact that she liked to travel.

13

Andrea’s voice interrupted her thoughts. “Your glasses,” she 14

said. “I’ve never seen you without them.”

15

Kate shrugged. “They’re somewhere at the Harvard Club, I 16

guess. I’m wearing contacts today.”

17

Andrea was still staring at her, a quizzical expression on her face.

18

“You remind me of someone,” she said.

19

Kate quickly changed the subject. “So, did you go away at all?”

20

she asked.

21

Andrea shook her head. “We just stayed put. I needed some 22

time to think. Brent and I both did, really. We did some research, 23

made some calls. We figured we have enough savings to travel for 24

six months or so. Maybe a year if we find work along the way.”

25

“So you’re actually doing it? You’re leaving Samson & Mills?”

26

“I gave notice today, actually. Next Friday’s my last day. Nor-27

mally, I’d have given more notice, but with everything going 28

on . . . , well, I figured they’d let it pass.”

29

“I would think so,” Kate said dryly.

30

Outside, the sky was a rich, deep blue. The Statue of Liberty 31

floated in the distant harbor.

32

“So how are you feeling?” Andrea said hesitantly. “I understand 33

if you don’t want to talk about it. I mean, Justin. God. You and he ort 34

were . . .”

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“Yes,” Kate said quickly. She didn’t want to hear what Andrea 9858_02_153-356_r6jm.qxd 9/28/00 3:59 PM Page 343

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would say next. She felt as if she might start to cry. “We were. But 1

I’m doing okay. I think it’s just going to take time. I still can’t really 2

believe what happened.”

3

“No,” Andrea said. “Neither can I.”

4

“It’s like things are never what you think they are. Here’s an-5

other weird thing. I’d been getting these e-mails. Someone claim-6

ing to have information about the firm. I’d actually made plans to 7

meet the sender. Last night at the Royalton. But you know who it 8

turned out to be
? Douglas Macauley.
This practical joker guy I’d 9

gone out with once. I’d stopped returning his calls. Well, he talked 10

to my friend Tara — she’d fixed me up with him in the first 11

place — and figured out I was obsessed with what was happening 12

here. He came up with an invitation he thought I couldn’t refuse.”

13

Andrea’s eyes widened. “That seems a little extreme,” she said.

14

Kate gave a faint smile. “Yeah, well. That’s just the sort of guy 15

he is.”

16

Another long pause.

17

“So what will you do?” Andrea finally asked. “Have you had 18

time to make any plans?”

19

Kate twisted the ruby ring on her right forefinger. It had been 20

with her through everything. “I’m leaving as well,” she said.

21

“They’re giving me a leave of absence. But I can’t imagine coming 22

back.”

23

“Will you be okay for money?”

24

“Yeah, I don’t really have much student loan debt. Before my 25

mother died, she set up this trust. It pretty much covered my edu-26

cation. Living expenses, too. After school, I sort of forgot about it.

27

I get these statements from my mother’s brokerage house. But I 28

haven’t really paid much attention. Maybe it was a way of pre-29

tending she wasn’t really dead.” Again, Kate studied the ruby ring.

30

She remembered how excited she’d been when she unwrapped it 31

on her sixteenth birthday, how pleased her mother had been.

32

“Anyway, last night, I opened the most recent statement. And 33

there’s . . . there’s a lot of money there now. Enough to take care of 34 sh

me for a couple of years, at least.”

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Kate looked up. Andrea was staring at her, incredulous.

2

“What?” Kate said.

3

Andrea shook her head. “I’m sorry, but I just can’t . . . You mean 4

you were working here, and you didn’t have to? I mean, I just as-5

sumed you were here like I was, to pay off loans, to get a little cash 6

together. But if that wasn’t it, then
why?
”

7

Kate gave her a rueful smile. “That’s one of the things I’ll have 8

to think about,” she said. The past seemed to swim through her 9

mind. Her campus interview with Carter Mills. The day she ar-10

rived at Samson. Late nights in the conference room with Andrea, 11

giggling over Chinese food and endless mountains of work.

12

Michael. Justin. The hopes and fears of a lifetime, all now to be re-13

examined.

14

Again, Kate looked out the window, at the blue of the water and 15

sky. This really was the end. She felt another surge of sadness.

16

“There’s an amazing view from this office,” she said.

17

From behind, she heard Andrea rise from her chair, come 18

around to stand behind her. “I’ll tell you a secret, Kate,” she said.

19

“It looks just the same from outside.”

20

21

22

Two hours later, the boxes packed, Kate waited for a porter to col-23

lect them. In the meantime, she checked her messages. Just two 24

calls. The first was from someone in personnel, calling to arrange 25

her exit interview. The second was from Peyton. “Hi, Kate. I 26

wanted to let you know that the Thorpe case settled today. Thanks 27

for all your good work. Oh, and sorry we’ll be losing you. Good 28

luck.”

29

Slowly, Kate hung up the phone.
Thanks for all your good work.

30

So the Thorpe case was over. There was sure to be a story there.

31

Briefly, she wondered what had happened. Then she realized she 32

didn’t really care.

33

Only one thing left to be done. Kate stared at a thin white en-ort 34

velope, the sole object left on her desk. Without looking, she knew reg 35

what was inside. The single gold cuff link from beneath her desk.

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A cuff link once worn by Chuck Thorpe. It wasn’t much in the way 1

of evidence. Still, it was a beginning. Again, she picked up the 2

phone.

3

“District attorney’s office.”

4

Kate took a deep breath. “I want to report a sexual assault, some-5

thing that happened to me. Can you tell me who I should talk to?”

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Saturday, January 30

2

3

Kate examined herself in the mirror. First the front, then the back 4

of her head. She turned to Hercules, beaming.

5

“I
love
it!” she said.

6

Hercules studied her appraisingly. “You said you wanted a change,”

7

he said. “I know I cut off more than you asked for, but it’s exactly what 8

I had in mind. I always thought short hair would suit you.”

9

Again, Kate looked in the mirror. Her hair, wispy around her 10

face, was short as a boy’s. And yet it didn’t look unfeminine. She 11

thought of the French word
gamine.
Of Audrey Hepburn. Winona 12

Ryder. Not that she looked like them. Or anyone for that matter.

13

The person she looked like was
herself.
For the first time that she 14

could remember.

15

“
You’re a genius,” she said to Hercules.

16

He lowered his head. “I know.”

ort 17

She was pulling on her coat, preparing to leave, when Hercules reg 18

edged up from the side.

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“I read in the papers about what happened,” he said. “I hope 1

you’re doing okay.”

2

“Yeah. Well. I guess it’ll take a while.”

3

“You know the last time you were here, I was worried. That was 4

right after —”

5

“I know,” Kate said.

6

“It’s just that you looked so much like her. I couldn’t figure it 7

out.”

8

Kate looked at him sadly. “Did everyone see it but me?”

9

Hercules shrugged. He seemed a little embarrassed. “Listen,” he 10

said. “I have a show that’s starting next Thursday. In a gallery a few 11

blocks from here. I’ve got some passes for the opening. If you’re in-12

terested.” She could tell he was trying to sound casual. But it obvi-13

ously meant a lot. With a shudder Kate thought of the mutilated 14

dolls, the banged-up Lincoln Log cabins. But who was she to 15

judge? Whatever she thought of his creations, Hercules had fol-16

lowed his heart.

17

“Sure,” she said brightly. “I’ll take two. I might want to bring a 18

date.”

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Sunday, January 31

2

3

An unseasonably warm day. Boats dipped and bobbed in the har-4

bor. White jetties cut a bright swath through deep blue water. Un-5

zipping her parka, Kate turned to Sam Howell.

6

“I’m glad I came out,” she said. “You were right. I needed to get 7

away.”

8

“Hungry yet?”

9

“Not really. I’d just as soon walk for a while.”

10

They were strolling down the wharf at the foot of Sag Harbor’s 11

Main Street. For the moment, Kate was at peace. Back in the city, 12

her old life still lay in tatters. But she didn’t have to think about 13

that now. Kate inhaled deeply, taking in the fresh sea air. It seemed 14

like the smell of new beginnings.

15

“I really do like the hair,” Howell said.

16

“Thanks,” she said. “Me too.”

ort 17

Reaching the end of the dock, they stopped and looked out reg 18

across the shimmering water, at the cottages nestled in the dis-9858_02_153-356_r6jm.qxd 9/28/00 3:59 PM Page 349

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tance. Kate thought of the view from her Samson office. But what 1

Andrea had said was right. It
did
look just the same from outside.

2

Better, even. With nothing to separate you from the endless blue.