Waiting for Him (Waiting Series Book 3) (13 page)

      “Jeff told me he didn’t want to hear from me and I’m assuming that he would’ve contacted me by now if he really missed me. We haven’t spoken in over two months. I miss him so much and I have so many regrets where he’s concerned, but maybe us being apart is best. There are so many hurtful and deceitful acts between us, it might be nice to start fresh with someone new...to start over with a clean slate and with no strikes against me. Of course, I don’t know how that’ll happen when I have a newborn baby to focus on. There’s plenty of time for me to worry about finding love again. Right now I’m just focusing on being the best mother I can be and relying only on myself.”

      Once Max and Sloane arrive we all decide to do some dancing. I haven’t been out on the dance floor since the night I conceived Liam. One thing’s for sure, this night’s going to end much differently than that one did. As I try to lose myself in the music and enjoy being with my friends, I’m struggling to let loose and dance with the abandon I typically do. I think I need to drink more if I’m going to do this. I’m acting like an old stick in the mud and I have no idea why. I want to have fun and be free, but something’s holding me back. Maybe it’s all the relationship drama I’ve had to deal with or maybe it’s that I’m a mother now and I feel the need to act responsibly at all times. Whatever it is, I don’t like it and I’m going to ply it with alcohol until it goes the fuck away. This is my night damn it! I’m out with my friends and I’m going to make the most of it.

      I find a vacant stool at the bar and slide my hip up onto it. I hold two fingers up in Angie’s direction and she winks at me. She knows that I want two more tequila shots. As she slides them over to me, I wonder if I should ask for two more? I don’t want to get sloppy drunk, though, just nicely buzzed. I toss both shots back in quick succession and exhale the burning fumes from my mouth. Just as I go to raise my arm in the air to get Angie’s attention, a warm pair of lips begins softly teasing the skin along the curve where my shoulder meets my neck, before skating up to my ear.

      “Hey, gorgeous. Did you miss me?” The deep timbre of his voice makes my thighs quiver. I don’t need to turn around and look to know who it is. I’d know that sexy voice anywhere. He slips his arms around my waist and leans in to kiss my cheek.

      “Hi, Jake,” I smile at his reflection in the mirror on the wall, behind the bar. Jake Morse, Hailey’s older brother, is one fine example of masculinity. He stands a couple of inches over six feet with shoulders that are broad and square. The tight navy blue henley he’s wearing shows off his well-muscled pecs to perfection. I can’t see the rest of him in the mirror, so I remove his arms from my waist and spin around on the stool until I’m facing him. He steps forward, crowding me, placing his legs between mine. I lean as far back as I can, resting my torso against the edge of the bar. I don’t usually like people crowding my personal space, but with Jake, judging from my elevated heart rate and fluttery stomach, I seem to like it a little too much. My eyes rake over his large form, savoring the flat plains of his stomach before moving down to his muscular thighs encased in some well-worn denim. I want to rub those jeans and see if they’re as soft and broken in as they look. He has work boots on his feet and there’s just something about seeing a guy in denim and those boots that really does it for me. My eyes trail slowly back up his form until they meet his heated blue gaze. Chills break out all over my body and I have to physically refrain from launching myself at his lips.
What the fuck is up with that?
Don’t get me wrong, Jake is gorgeous, but I’ve never had the urge to rip his clothes off and slide down his cock before.
Damn.
I exhale a big breath and mentally fan myself.
I’m having a hot flash and I’m only t
wenty-four. I need to find someone to have sex with asap and it can’t be Jake...I’m not going there.
My best friend’s brother.
No matter how scorching hot he is or how much I want to lick every delectable inch of him, that’s a line I’ve always been careful not to cross. That’s a line that needs an electric fence right now because I really want to cross it...
God do I want to cross it.

      Jake looms over me, placing his hands on the bar on either side of me. His arms bend as he slowly lowers his face toward mine.
Whoa, what the hell is he doing?
I place both of my hands on his rock hard chest to keep him from coming any closer.
This was a mistake.
I think as I take in the rock solid feel of his torso beneath my hands. The warmth of his skin through the soft material of his shirt tempts me. Jake paused momentarily at the initial contact of my hands before he continues moving forward. My elbows bend leaving me with both arms pulled into my chest, trapped between our bodies.

      “I didn’t get my hug.” He says, placing a hand on my lower back and pulling me forward until I have to wrap my arms around his neck or topple over backward on my stool. Both of his arms are now around my back as he stands straight up still holding me. There’s an awkward moment where I don’t know what to do with my legs because he’s so much taller than me and my feet are nowhere near the floor. Do I wrap them around his waist or do I let them dangle?
Wrap...or dangle.
..wrap...or dangle? What’s the proper protocol for hugging a really hot friend that you suddenly want to screw? The press of his pelvis against mine makes the decision for me and I reflexively wrap my legs around his waist so my lady parts are not in direct contact with his large manly ones. I’ve never seen Jake naked, but I just know that his cock has to be phenomenal like the rest of him. Anything less than eight inches on a body like his would be a total disappointment.
Stop thinking about his cock.
I bet it’s thick too.
Oh my God, get a grip.

      While I was lost in thoughts of Jake’s naked body, one of his hands moved down to cup my ass and the other is on my lower back.
What the hell?

      “Jake, why is your hand on my ass?” He laughs before answering.

      “I’m holding you up.” He says matter of factly, but I can see the mischievous look in his eyes.

      “Well, isn’t that thoughtful of you,” I say, my voice loaded with sarcasm. I unwrap myself from his hold and he lets me slide down the front of his body. The flutter of arousal it causes as our bodies rub against each other is unexpected. Visions of me sliding naked down another part of him assault my brain. I try to stop the telltale flush that I know is taking over my face, certain he’ll know the dirty path my thoughts are traveling.

      “What brings you here, tonight?” I ask, trying to distract him.

      “Hailey told me where you guys would be and since I haven’t seen or heard from you in ages, I thought I’d swing by. How have you been?”

      “I’ve been good. Liam’s keeping me busy, but it’s the best kind of busy.” I smile as I think of my adorable little guy. I wonder if he’s sound asleep now?

      “Are you and Garrett back together or are you still with Jeff?” My head begins shaking before he’s even done uttering the words. I grimace as I think of how my love life sounds like some crazy episode of Jerry Springer.

      “I’m not with either one of them. Jeff moved to Florida for his dream job. He asked me to join him, but I didn’t want to move. Once he found out that Garrett was Liam’s father he told me he didn’t want to talk to me anymore and that he needed a clean break. As far as Garrett and I go, we’ve become good friends and spend a lot of time together. There’s no future for us, though. I’m planning on having a heart to heart with him tomorrow just to make sure we’re on the same page.” Jake flashes me his infectious grin and I find my cheeks lifting into an answering smile. It’s almost as if my cheeks move on their own accord, but I guess that speaks volumes about the power of Jake’s smile.

      “What are you so happy about? I just told you what a disaster my life has become and you think it’s funny?” I ask, poking him in his rock hard stomach. It kind of hurt my finger. He catches my hand with his and uses it to tug me forward. I stumble into him awkwardly, landing against his chest. His arms slide around me, resting low on my waist...dangerously low...almost into ass territory low. Both of my palms are resting flat against his chest and it’s all I can do to resist the urge I have to slide them down to his stomach and back up under his shirt. His skin would be scorching hot on my hands as I slowly traced his defined abdominals.
Stop it. Focus.
My eyes raise up to meet Jake’s, and there’s an answering smirk playing around the right corner of his lips as if he knows I was lost in lust filled thoughts.

      “So now that you’re single again, don’t you think it’s time that we finally have sex?” My mouth drops open in a comical fashion as the question he asked me registers.

      “No,”
I answer trying to sound strong and not like the quivering mass of need that I am. I haven’t had sex in months and what he’s offering is too good to pass up...but I have to.
Best friend’s older brother...line I can’t cross…

      “Why not?”
That’s a good question, why can’t we again? I know, I know, I need to do the right thing, but he’s so damn tempting. GAH, being a responsible adult sucks.

      “I’m pretty sure we’ve had this conversation before and nothing has changed since then. Your sister and I are still best friends so it’s not going to happen.” He pulls me forward, closer to him until our bodies are flush together. My breath hitches at the contact and I’m sure he notices. He lowers his head down toward mine, stopping when his lips are right below my ear. I close my eyes, breathing deeply and force myself to hold still.

      “I know you feel the attraction between us, don’t lie to me and say you don’t. I think it’s time we did something about it, don’t you?” I shake my head no, still keeping my eyes closed. Maybe if I don’t look at him, it will be easier to refuse what he’s offering.

      “Shelby,” he says my name, his husky voice sends bolts of desire shooting down to my core and I’m pretty sure my panties are wet at this point. It’s not easy to act unaffected by him when all I want to do is leap into his arms and find a closet we can fuck like rabid animals in. Somehow I know that sex between us would be rough and animalistic. It would be clothes ripping, wall slamming, hair grabbing sex and God,
I want it so bad.
It would be so easy to give into this blazing chemistry we have, to let whatever happens, happen, but I haven’t been that girl in a long time. I used to be carefree and fun, never worrying about what the consequences of my actions might be. Getting my heart broken by Garrett and all of the events that followed changed me. I’m a look first, leap later girl or maybe I should say I’m a don’t leap at all girl. If you don’t take a chance, you can’t get hurt.

      “Shelby,” He says my name again, tipping my chin up with his thumb and index finger. “Look at me.” He orders in a commanding voice.
Holy fuck
. Now I know my panties are wet.

      “I want you and you want me. This has been building for a long time now and we need to do something about it. The attraction between us has been there for years, it’s obviously not going away. Let’s fuck and get it out of our systems before you meet Mr. Right and settle down. If not, for the rest of your life you’ll think of me and wonder what sex would have been like with us and that won’t be fair to your husband. This will just be sex between two friends who happen to be extremely attracted to each other. It doesn’t have to be complicated, we can keep it simple and hot, because you know it’s going to be fucking hot. I can think of at least twenty different ways I want to fuck you right this minute, five of them involve bending you over the bar.”

    
Oh, Christ on a cracker.
My legs are weak from the combination of his dirty words and his close proximity. Did I say my panties were wet because drenched might be a better description? I’m not sure how, but I manage to dig deep down in my gut and find the strength to refuse him.

      “Jake, it can’t happen. I won’t sleep with you.” I push against his chest and he releases his arms from around my waist. I take a step back and put some much-needed distance between us.

      “Shelby, you can keep telling yourself that it’s not going to happen if that makes you feel better. Sooner or later you and I will have sex and it will be the fuck of your life.” With that parting shot, he walks away and I collapse back against the bar behind me. 

***

      Garrett is bringing Liam home any moment now and my stomach is a little unsettled. I’m not looking forward to having this conversation with him, but I know it’s time. We need to put any thought of us getting back together to rest so we can both move on. I want him to find happiness with someone. This is the first time that the thought of him with anyone else doesn’t bother me. I’m hoping this is a sign that I’m doing the right thing.

      I’m in the kitchen making a salad when I hear them come in. I left the door unlocked. I quickly wipe my hands on the dish towel and then go to see my little guy. They’re in the living room sitting on the couch. They look so adorable together I pull out my phone and take a few pictures. Aside from his blonde hair and full lips, he’s the spitting image of his father. Garrett has him sitting in his lap with Liam’s back being cushioned by his chest. They both smile at me as I continue taking pictures.

      “Okay, now it’s time for you to see your mommy,” I say as I pick him up in my arms. I blow a raspberry on his tee shirt covered belly and he giggles. There’s no sound in the whole world that’s better than that. I kiss him repeatedly on his chubby little cheeks trying to make up for all of the kisses I didn’t get to give him last night.