Waiting for Him (Waiting Series Book 3) (11 page)

      “Yeah, let’s go. It’ll be nice to have a relaxing meal.

      We eat at a restaurant that my father recommended. He knows the owner so we were able to get a last minute reservation. The feel of the decor is very upscale and the prices on the menu reflect that. I should’ve known that my dad wouldn’t eat anywhere that wasn’t beyond my price point. It’s nothing but the best for him and his friends. I’ve become more of a pizza or Chinese takeout kind of girl. It’s nice to get dressed up once in a while, but lately more often than not, I’m just happy if I get a shower while it’s still light out.

      Once we’ve ordered we sit in companionable silence, neither of us feeling the need to fill it. The waitress comes back to drop off our drinks and as I’m sipping my wine, I can feel Garrett’s gaze on me. I look up and take in his hazel eyes that are currently focused on my chest. I know I’m showing the girls off tonight with the dress that I’m wearing, but I decided that I wanted to feel a little less mom-like tonight. The old Shelby is still in here, she’s just covered with spit up and breast milk most days.

      “You look really beautiful tonight, Shelby. I love that dress on you.

      “Thank you. I think you’re looking pretty dashing yourself tonight.” I say evenly, my tone is not revealing the direction my thoughts have started go. He really does look gorgeous. I love the way his black dress pants hug his delectable ass and his gray dress shirt fits him perfectly. His sleeves are rolled up showing off his muscular forearms and the silver of his Rolex watch looks so prominent against the tan skin of his arm. He’s been going for runs more than he’s been making it to the gym and the time spent outdoors looks good on him. His eyes appear even more striking against his tanned visage. I can’t help but wonder where this date will end tonight.
How do I want it to end?
I don’t know the answer to that. I still want Garrett, and I’d pretty much kill for him to touch me, but I’ve been missing Jeff a lot lately. I think I may need to continue on with what I’ve been doing this week, keeping some distance between us.

      I remind myself of that very thought as I’m in Garrett’s arms slow dancing to the band the restaurant has performing on the weekends. Dinner was delicious and neither one of us wanted to see the night end so early. We decided to stay and take advantage of the live entertainment provided. I didn’t have any intention of dancing with him and I’m not even sure how I ended up out here. I do know that as much as my brain thinks I shouldn’t be in his arms, my body is one-hundred percent onboard. My heart pounds as our chests press tantalizingly together and our hips are tight against each other...tight enough that I can feel his need for me as we sway side to side. His hands are slowly torturing me as they roam over my back and hips, before briefly resting on my ass. Warm lips trace my earlobe and pause.

      “This is nice...dancing...having you in my arms…” The heat from his husky whisper in my ear is so unexpected my eyes close with pleasure.
Longing
. I’m consumed with the need to connect our lips and I’m fighting the urge to pull his head down and kiss him with every fiber of my being.

      “It is nice.” I somehow manage to make my voice come out as if I’m not having an internal war with myself. His hands are hot on my back as they rest on the bare skin that’s exposed with the cut of this dress. His thumbs trace slow, sensual circles on my skin sending desire pulsing to my core. I bite my lip and stare over his shoulder as I try to calm my raging hormones.
Get a grip.
You’re just dancing.
I stare over his shoulder, letting my focus relax until everything around me is a blur as I savor being in his arms. This needs to be as far as things go with us tonight. Our dancing feels like foreplay, but it’s going to have to be the main event. I can’t go down that same route with him again. There’s too much at stake now that we have Liam. Garrett and I have forged a friendship and that’s going to have to be enough.

***

      I somehow managed to resist the magnetic pull between us and I’m now home safely in my bed alone. As I lie here, I can’t help but think about all that’s happened in such a short period of time. There have been some major changes in my life recently and I haven’t even had a chance for them to truly sink in. Losing Jeff has created a huge hole in my universe. Even though he was in Florida, he was still calling me and we were in touch at some point each day. I miss him desperately and I hope he feels the same. It’s not that I want him to be miserable, but I certainly don’t want him to forget about me already. I’m sure I’m not alone in feeling this way and that most people prefer to think that they’ll be missed once a relationship ends. Maybe it’s motivated by insecurity, or it could just be that we all want to feel like we matter to someone and that without us, their lives are forever changed.

      As I drift off to sleep I’m lost in memories of heated kisses...hands clenched tightly with mine...a hard cock sliding in and out of me...and blue eyes gazing lovingly down at me.

Chapter - Eighteen

Jeff

     
It’s been about a month since I ended things with Shelby. I must be the biggest dumbass in the world for walking away from her. I miss her almost every moment of every day. I have a permanent ache in my chest and in my pants too. I thought once a little time had passed it would get easier, but that doesn’t seem to be the case. I’ve been trying to stay busy by working extra hours. I love my new job and the pay is great. My savings account has never seen this much money before. I’ve made a few friends too. Erik one of the assistant coaches here actually knows Shelby. He used to date Hailey when they were in high school. I was kind of freaked out when I heard he knew them. It reminded me of that game--Six Degrees of Separation from Kevin Bacon. It seems like the more I try not to think about Shelby, the universe keeps throwing her in my face. It’s like the worst case of irony ever. I’m having enough trouble getting over her.
A little help here would be nice, universe.

      I haven’t gotten the details on what happened between Erik and Hailey, but I’m sure I’ll hear about it at some point. If I remember correctly from what Shelby told me, Erik cheated on Hailey while he was away at college. As far as I’m concerned, fidelity is the most important thing in a relationship. Some people would probably disagree and say it’s honesty, respect or loyalty, but fidelity is made up of all of those. You have to have all of those traits to be faithful in your relationship. I’m not someone that cheats or at least I haven’t in the past. I love Shelby enough to walk away and do right by her this time. Maybe this is a way for me to atone for my sins of the past. It’s possible that the next relationship I end up in I won’t feel the same. I can’t imagine ever loving someone else with the intensity I feel toward Shelby.  Maybe I’ll turn into a huge manwhore who only has one night stands.
Nah, that’s not who I am or who I want to be.

***

      I’m out at a bar with Erik and his buddy Mike who works for the same university as us as an assistant coach for the basketball team. The bar that we’re at is filled with bodies and there’s loud country music pumping through the sound system. I’m not a fan of country and I can’t say I’ve ever heard it in a bar before--in a country themed bar yes. That’s just one of the many examples of how living in Florida differs from Massachusetts.

      The guys and I are throwing shots of Jager back and I’m enjoying the buzz I’m getting from them. It feels great to be enjoying myself and not be thinking about Shelby every minute.
There I go again.
I wonder if having sex with someone else would help me miss her less? At this point, I’m willing to try almost anything to end the chronic dull ache in my chest. Waking up with raging hard ons every day from dreaming about her hasn’t been easy to deal with either. Even rubbing one out in the shower each morning isn’t helping. I miss her sweet pussy and the way it felt wrapped around my cock. I’m getting hard sitting here thinking about it and I have to adjust myself through my pants.
This is not the time or place to be thinking these thoughts.

      After downing a few more shots the three of us get asked to dance by some sexy women and who am I to object, especially in my semi-drunken state. The girl I’m dancing with has a banging body, although her tits seem to be silicone and not the real deal like Shelby’s are.
Oh my, God, I need to stop thinking about her.
My teeth clench as I resolve not to let her enter my head for the rest of the night. Instead, I focus on the tight jeans encased round booty in front of me that keeps rubbing against my dick. I’m already getting hard--it doesn’t take much these days. Samantha notices and grinds her ass into it.
I think her name is Samantha.
I have to be honest, I like the way she’s so into my cock. It’s nice to know that it’s not only Shelby that wants me. I’ve only slept with a couple of girls besides her and they were before she came into my life.
I close my eyes in frustration. Why can’t I stop thinking about her?

      My fingers grip Samantha’s hips and pull her back into me before I let them slide down over her hip bones and remain there. She doesn’t stop me, in fact, she rests her head back against my shoulder, thrusting her breasts forward and exposing her neck. Who am I to resist such a blatant offer? I lower my head and skate my lips along the edge of her jaw, moving back to just below her ear. I lick the bottom of her lobe, and she moans, bumping her ass into my raging hard on. She reaches up and clenches her hands in my hair as I continue to lick and suck my way up and down her neck.

      “Do you want to get out of here?” I ask, hoping that the answer will be yes. She spins in my arms and nods her head before pulling my mouth down to hers. The kiss is wet and kind of messy. It’s not really doing anything for me, but her fingers rubbing along the length of my cock are. I slide my mouth from hers and grab her hand pulling her along behind me. It only takes a minute until I’m unlocking my SUV and she climbs into the back seat.
Okay, I guess we’re going to do this now.

      “Can I blow you?’ She asks out of the blue.
Jesus
. I nod my head, taken aback by her brazenness. What she lacks in finesse she’s making up for with eagerness. Her fingers rip open the button on my jeans and she yanks down my zipper. She barely has the fly open before her hand is wrapped around my cock. Her grip is tight as she pumps her fist up and down. I throw my head back on the seat rest and close my eyes, enjoying the sensation. Warm wetness wraps around me, I guess she was serious about the blow job. I grip her head with my hands and help her move at a steady pace up and down my cock all the time imagining it’s Shelby’s mouth wrapped around me. My hips begin thrusting up to meet her downward motions and I know that I can’t hold out any longer. The tingle begins in my lower stomach and moves down into my cock as I spurt my orgasm into her mouth calling out Shelby’s name as I do. She immediately releases her hold on me and I open my eyes to find her already opening the back door.

      “I’m sorry,” I say in a croaky voice as I try to slow my breathing.

      “Whatever.” She says as she slams the door shut, walking away. I run a hand through my hair and refasten my pants. Now that I’ve taken the plunge so to speak and I’ve done something sexual with someone else, I don’t feel any better. In fact, I feel worse because now it’s as though I’ve been unfaithful to Shelby.
Why do I feel as though I’ve been disloyal to her when we’re not in a relationship anymore?”

      The rest of the weekend passed quickly by and now it’s back to the grind. I’m in the gym working with Josh, the university’s star running back. He’s running through some plyometric drills and I’m once again thinking about Shelby.
Fuck
. I really need to get a grip and stop this madness. She doesn’t want me and I don’t want to be with someone that I’ll always be second best with. Besides it’s not like she can just move down here...she has a baby now...they have a baby now.
Fuck.
As much as I miss her, I miss Liam just as much. I guess I should say I miss the idea of him being mine. I haven’t really gotten a chance to get to know him, but I sure did love the thought of being his daddy. I guess it wasn’t meant to be and one of these days I’ll move on and Shelby will be a distant memory.
At least, I hope she will…

     
The rest of my afternoon is spent on the field watching the team run through drills and completing their stretches. I’m standing on the sidelines with Erik as he puts the guys through their paces. There are a couple of players that are just recovering from injuries, so I’m paying special attention to them. I’m watching for signs of pain or discomfort. I’ve found that athletes tend to push themselves too far when they’re injured and they’re not always honest about whether or not they’re hurting. I can often spot the signs when I’m watching and I can stop them from doing more damage.

      “Did you end up taking Samantha home last night?” Erik asks me. I look over at him confused for a moment

      “No, I didn’t. How do you know what her name is?” I ask.
Does this girl go around offering blow jobs to all the coaches and players?
If that’s the case, I’m relieved we didn’t have sex.

      “She’s the captain of the cheerleading squad.”
Fuck my life.

      “Seriously?” My eyebrow raises in question.

      “Yeah, dude. She’s fucking hot. Why didn’t you take her home? From what I’ve heard, she’s a wildcat in bed. She used to date Brody until she went all fatal attraction on his ass. She couldn’t handle the amount of attention he got from other girls. She would hijack his phone and email, looking for signs that he was cheating on her. She was crazy.” He shakes his head.    “When you date the quarterback you have to expect that he’s going to have girls throwing pussy at him.”

I can’t believe I let the head cheerleader blow me. What a dumbass. I wonder if I could lose my job over this?

      “You said I should have taken her home. Couldn’t that be grounds for termination? No pussy is worth losing my job over.” I say acting as though nothing happened with Samantha. Hopefully, she keeps her mouth shut, but I’m hot holding my breath.

      “Sleeping with the cheerleaders is frowned upon, but it’s happened before and no one’s lost their job over it”
Well that’s a relief
.

      As practice winds down and the guys grab their water bottles and gear, the cheerleaders make their way onto the field.
Oh great.
I grab my backpack from one of the benches and sling it over my shoulder, before making my way off the field. I'm almost in the clear when I hear a female voice call my name. I’m tempted to keep going, but I know I need to deal with this right here, right now. I have to nip this thing in the bud so to speak. I know exactly what kind of girl Samantha is. I dealt with girls like her when I was in college. I had girls throwing themselves at me all the time just because I was the quarterback of our football team.

      I stop walking and turn around knowing who I’ll find wanting to talk to me. Yep, it’s Samantha, and she’s jogging over to me in her tiny workout shorts and sports bra. I’m not even slightly tempted by her. I must have been drunk and maudlin Saturday night to even consider sleeping with her. She’s not even close to being my type.
She looks nothing like Shelby
. I cross my arms over my chest and brace myself for the less than pleasant conversation I know is coming.

      “Hi,” she smiles prettily, batting her eyelashes at me. I remain silent, waiting for her to continue. “I’m sorry I stormed off the other night.” She inches closer to me and rubs her hand up and down my bicep until it falls to her side when I take a step back. I want to keep some distance between us. This probably looks bad enough to anyone observing us, I’m not adding any fuel to the fire.

      “I’m sorry about the other night,” I say, still not making eye contact with her. “That never should have happened. At the time, I didn’t realize who you were, or I never would’ve danced with you.” She frowns up at me.

      “You didn’t know who I was?” She asks incredulously. I shake my head and wonder how the hell I ever thought it was a good idea to ask her to leave with me.

      “No, I had no idea who you were.” She licks her lips and puts her hands on her hips, thrusting her chest forward.

      “Well, you know who I am now. The other night doesn’t have to be a one-time thing.” Her hands slide over her hips and into her back pockets as she arches her back. This girl doesn’t know the meaning of the word subtle.

      “Actually, it does have to be because it should have never happened in the first place. It won’t be happening again either. I’m an employee here and you’re a student. The two should never mix.” She pushes her bottom lip out and looks up at me.

      “Why can’t we do it again? No one has to know,” she steps forward until her breasts are cushioned against my arm, “except the two of us.” I back away a couple of steps and shake my head at her.

      “Nothing’s going to happen here.” I wag my finger back and forth pointing between us. “Forget about the other night and move on to someone else. I’ve already forgotten about it.” I turn and begin to walk away. I know that my parting shot was cruel, but she needs to know that I’m serious and I’m not playing some game with her. It’s bad enough that I let someone besides Shelby suck my dick, never mind that she’s a student here.