The Color Of Grace (19 page)

Todd sat next to me and leaned in close enough to take a
whiff of my shampoo. “I think it’s the bowler, not the ball, that’s the
problem.”

Glad Ryder had already gone off to search for a new ball and
wasn’t present to see Todd lean toward me, I surged to my feet to take my turn.
Quickly throwing my first ball before Ryder could return, I was surprised to
knock down four pins my first try and four the second round.

“All right, Grace,” Todd cheered. “Way to go.”

Next went another cheerleader—a girl I actually liked. Then
Todd, then some boy I was pretty sure went by the nickname Grunt, and then it
was Ryder’s turn. But he still hadn’t returned with Kiera’s new ball. Everyone
glanced around until we caught sight of him chatting with a middle-aged man as
he held Kiera’s new ball down at his side.

Todd pushed to his feet and cupped his hands around his
mouth. “Yo, Yates,” he yelled through the bowling alley. “It’s your turn, man.”

Embarrassed for Ryder’s benefit, I turned my red cheeks away
from Todd so he couldn’t see how much his yell horrified me. But geesh. How
inappropriate, as my mom would call it, to interrupt his conversation.

Ryder lifted his face, spotted us watching him, then turned
back to the man and said something—probably that he had to go—before turning
back to us and making his way to our lane.

“Will this do?” he asked his girlfriend, handing over the
new ball.

Kiera took it, weighed it in her hand, and grinned. “It’s
perfect. Just like you.”

“Dude, who was that old geezer?” Todd asked, letting out a
derisive snort as he glanced the man’s way.

“His name’s Brady,” Ryder explained. “He was telling me he
and his wife come here every Thursday night with their two kids.”

Ryder could talk to anyone. Reluctantly, I admired him for
that fact. And even as I felt my approval spark and some of my resentment for
him slip, Todd laughed, holding his middle.

“Man, you can be so lame. You’ll talk to any bum off the
street, won’t you?”

Ryder shrugged, the move implying he couldn’t care less what
anyone thought of him. Then he hiked up his bowling ball and took his turn. I
studied his back as he poised himself, aligned with the lane, his bowling ball
tucked up under his chin as he studied the triangle of pins.

He really didn’t care what anyone thought of him. I found
myself admiring that ability as well and had to wonder if that’s what made him
so popular. The inability to knuckle under peer pressure.

But, no, Ryder Yates was so popular because he was simply
Ryder. He had the looks, the money, the personality. Classmates flocked to him
to get themselves noticed.

They were all using him and he, well, he didn’t seem to care
about that either.

He finally took three steps forward, swung back his arm and
let go of his ball. It rolled down the slick aisle and flattened all ten pins.

I wasn’t surprised.

Kiera screamed and jumped from her seat, flying toward him
with her arms open. She nearly bulldozed him over when he turned around with a
big smile. She leaped and landed in his unsuspecting arms, wrapping both legs
around his waist and kissing him breathless. It was such the perky cheerleader
move, I almost gagged.

Across the seats, Mindy caught my attention and rolled her
eyes. We shared a small smile.

Todd plopped moodily down next to me and hooked an arm over
my shoulder. “Lucky shot,” he whispered in my ear and then kissed my hair,
nuzzling his nose against the dark locks.

It made me remember Ryder’s bet yet again. Doom dropped
heavily into the base of my stomach. I was so going to lose five bucks.

Chapter 15

Stable, wholesome, organic, orderly.
Brown is supposed to be a practical, natural color. Earth. Wood. Stone. It’s
true to its environment, never changing, oh-so-reliable. The only thing
reliable about me these days is confusion. I no longer feel like the wholesome
girl I was in Hillsburg, and nothing is neat and tidy anymore. Nothing is
stable here. Nothing is brown. Not even me.

* * * *

Todd kissed me again before the night was over.

I tried to avoid it. Honest.

I didn’t even want him to drive me home. But when I called
Barry’s house, ready to be picked up after we’d finished bowling, no one
answered the phone. And Todd just so happened to be hanging around after I hung
up. I must’ve looked as lonely and desperate as I felt because he surged toward
me, all perky and hopeful as if he knew exactly what kind of predicament I’d
found myself in.

Grr. Fate had it in for me, didn’t it?

“Everything okay?” he asked, but he didn’t sound worried.
The turd sounded optimistic.

I nodded but admitted, “My stepdad didn’t answer the phone.”

His eyes lit. “Do you need a ride home? I could give you a
lift.”

As I glanced past him, my gaze sought an alternate outlet.
Too bad Joel was long gone. I would’ve made him give me a lift home, or better
yet, I would’ve made him take me to his house because I needed a dose of
Bridget like you wouldn’t believe.

Mindy’s boyfriend was holding open the front exit for her to
precede him outside. I suppose I could’ve dashed after them and begged a ride.
But that would look a bit too obvious. I caught sight of Kiera and immediately
glanced Ryder’s way. He wouldn’t have a problem dropping me off at Barry’s
house. I’m not sure how I knew that; I just did. Except I did not want to be
stuck in the same automobile with him and Kiera for any length of time. So I
nixed that. With dread pooling in my gut, I looked up at Todd, bit the inside
of my lip, and gave him a sick, little smile.

“That would be wonderful, thank you.”

He tried to engage me in conversation on the drive, but it
didn’t really take. I answered in short, one or two word phrases, which made me
feel all rude and ungrateful. But the more I learned about Todd Stangman, the
less I wanted to.

He played mean jokes on his friends. Not just fun,
light-hearted teasing like sprinkling salt and pepper and maybe a little
ketchup in someone’s drink when they were off in the bathroom, but cruel jokes
like tacking a sign on someone’s back that said, “I’m horny,” and then writing
the friend’s name and phone number underneath.

Ryder had been the one to spot the note and tear it off the
poor guy’s back. As the boy’s face had turned a dark, scarlet red from
mortification, Todd had burst out laughing, slapping at his knee, unable to
stop, letting everyone plainly know he had been the offender.

Once he pulled into Barry’s driveway, I reached for the
handle and was halfway out of his Jeep by the time he came to a complete stop.
“Thanks for the ride,” I called as I shut my door.

Behind me, the engine stopped. I ground my teeth and picked
up my pace, hurdling a frozen puddle in the sidewalk.

“Grace,” Todd called after me, as he dove out the driver’s
side. He sounded urgent, as if I’d forgotten something. I turned, expecting to
see him holding up my purse before I realized my purse was slung over my
shoulder where it should be.

“I’ll walk you to your door,” he said, panting as he reached
me.

We were only two feet from the porch steps.

“No really. I’m okay,” I said and began to rotate back to my
determined path, escape firmly planted in my goals.

But he caught my arm. “Wait.”
Encouraging me back around, he smiled as if he knew exactly what I was trying
to do and it only amused him. “I hope you had a good time tonight.”

Mistakenly thinking he wanted to talk a moment before he
tried to plant a wet one, I opened my mouth to give the polite, mandatory
response, but he swooped down and caught me off guard.

There was no five-second lag this time around. I pulled back
instantly and even smacked at his hand that had already found my hip.

He gave an innocent blink. “What’s wrong?”

“You’re rushing,” I said from between gritted teeth.

He sighed and ran his hand through his hair. “I’m sorry. I
just…” Then he smiled and leaned back in again toward me. “You just make me
want more.”

Dipping his head, he came in fast to lay another one on me.

Already pulling my face away for the second time and raising
my hand to manually shove his face back, I nearly wept with relief when the
porch lights flashed on and the front door opened.

Barry began to shuffle outside, wearing a sweat suit and
white socks, but he stopped short when he lifted his face and saw us, me nearly
breaking my spine as I leaned backward away from Todd and Todd arched over on
top of me, his neck craned out and lips still puckered.

Eyes widening—with a bit too much fake
surprise—Barry pulled back. “Oh, it’s just you, Grace. I’m sorry; I didn’t know
you were coming home so early. I could’ve picked you up.”

Since Todd respectfully straightened and stepped a space
away from me in Barry’s presence, I straightened too, smoothing down my coat
and then my hair.

“You weren’t home when I called.”

“Oh. I’m sorry. Your mom was called in to work tonight, so I
ran out and rented a movie. Hey, you want to watch it with me?”

My immediate response was, “Sure.” Whirling toward Todd, I
said goodbye, totally dismissing him.

He glanced at Barry as if he hoped my stepfather would scurry
back into the house, leaving him with one more opportunity to grope me. Bless
Barry for this, but he stayed rooted in the opened doorway—probably letting all
kinds of cold air into the house—and offered Todd a cheerful grin along with a
wave as he said, “G’night, son.”

As Todd bowed his head and slumped back to his car, Barry
stepped the rest of the way onto the porch as I climbed the stairs to meet him.

“Thank you,” I said, meaning it from the bottom of my heart.

He smiled, and this time it wasn’t fake. “No problem.”

Todd’s Jeep started. Barry glanced over my shoulder as he
held the door open for me. “Who was that?”

“Todd,” was all I said.

“Hmm.” Coming in behind him, Barry paused to wipe his socks
on the welcome mat. “So, you don’t like this Todd guy, or what?”

I shrugged. “He’s okay.”

No way was I going to discuss this subject with my stepfather
who I’d only known for a few months, but he looked at me and I felt compelled
to explain. “He just likes me more than I’m ready for right now.”

Barry nodded. “Ah, yes, teenage boys have no subtly in
showing their…affections.”

“Tell me about it,” I muttered and rolled my eyes.

Laughing, Barry slung his arm over my shoulder and led me
toward the living room where the movie he’d rented was still playing the opening
credits. “As long as he hasn’t tried more than a couple kisses, I guess I’ll
let him live.”

For some reason, his comment caught me off guard. Since I
was still rusty at the whole having-a-father-thing, I doubted the inner voice
in my head that screamed
warning,
warning, not appropriate behavior
.

It felt very odd to me, though, that kisses were okay in
Barry’s book but anything more was grounds for termination. From the sitcoms
I’d seen, Dads usually starting cleaning their guns even before a boy touched their
baby girl. Barry, on the other hand, sounded—I don’t know—more jealous instead
of fatherly.

The arm draped over my shoulder suddenly burned through my
clothes and gained about fifty pounds. His fingers grazed the side of my arm as
he turned, steering us toward the couch. I shivered. Did dads even put their
arms around their daughters’ shoulders? I had no idea.

Pausing, he looked down at me, narrowing his eyes as he
studied my face, which was no doubt tense with apprehension.

“He hasn’t, has he?”

Took me a moment to realize he was asking just how far Todd
had tried to push me. My heart pounded as I stared up at my stepfather.

“No,” I said quietly.

He sighed in obvious relief. I frowned and started to turn
away but he tightened his arm around me.

“Grace,” he said softly.

Too afraid to even gulp down another petrified swallow, I
glanced up. The look in his eyes made my skin go cold. All the hairs stood up
on the back of my neck. He continued to give me the intense look and I gave him
a frightened, please-don’t-touch-me stare in return. I couldn’t help but remember
what Kiera had said.

Eww. Your new stepdad is that creepy
dentist?

Then I recalled the knowing gleam in Todd’s eyes when he
first told me,
I know where Dr. Struder
lives
as if he’d been here numerous times over the years to egg the creepy
dentist’s house.

It made me wonder exactly what the people of Osage knew
about my stepfather that I did not.