Read Struggling Free (Hidden Secrets Book 5) Online
Authors: P. J. Belden
“Is…”
I cleared my throat. “Is there anything special she needs to do?” By some miracle, I was able to get out a coherent thought.
“No,
not at this stage. Just get plenty of rest, be sure to eat something small every two hours, drink plenty of water. No heavy lifting or over exerting yourself,” he looked at me. “I have a feeling that won’t be a problem with this one here.” He winked at Vicky.
Turning,
he pulled some photos from the little machine and handed them to us. “Thank you,” Vicky said with a quiver in her voice.
“You’re
both welcome. It’s not every day I see triplets. I know this is overwhelming and scary, feel free to call the office at any time. Anyone here will be more than welcome to answer any questions or concerns that you may have along the way. If you’d like I can recommend a group for women pregnant with multiples.”
“Not…
not yet. I’ll let you know once this all sets in.”
He
patted her hand. “I understand. Well, you’re all cleaned up. I’ll see you in a couple weeks, okay?”
We
both nodded and he walked out of the room. I helped her get up off the table. I could feel her shaking. Pulling her into a hug, I buried my face in her neck, kissing it repeatedly. She held me back tightly as she cried.
A
knock on the door brought my head up, but I didn’t let Vicky go. “Come in.”
“I
figured it would be best if I came in here to schedule your appointment,” said a nurse as she entered.
Once
the appointment was set, I opened the door to find Dean standing outside it.
“We’ve
been given directions to get out of here safer. Paco has gone and got your car. He’ll be pulling it around. Once I have you two secured in the car, I’ll collect ours and will follow you out.”
“Sounds
good. Whatever gets her out safely, that’s all that matters,” my business tone came out at the sight of Dean.
“Who
would have thought it, you a pops,” Dean smiled. “I’m Dean. I’ve been protecting Jake for the better part of seven years.”
Vicky
shook his hand. “Vicky, nice to meet you,” she sniffled.
The
rush to the car had me worried that Vicky was moving too fast. I was constantly making Dean slow down. Vicky would then smack me and tell me she’s not fragile. Dean would laugh and we’d move back at the same pace we were before. My heart was hammering in my chest. There was three times as much to worry about now.
Finally,
we reached the car and were safely inside. We had to wait for Dean to pull their car around before we could take off. My attention turned to Vicky.
“Are
you okay?”
“Yeah,
I’ll be better when we get home,” she answered in a small voice.
“I
love you. I’m so sorry for the circus I just pulled you into.”
“You
don’t have to apologize. Just wasn’t prepared for it today. Neither were you.”
“Excuse
me, Sir, but where are we headed?”
Rattling
off the directions to the cabin, I realized something. “Dean and Paco are going to need a place to stay close to us.”
“The
back of the house has a walk out basement that is a two bedroom apartment. It’s small, but they don’t have to stay down there twenty-four/seven,” she shrugged.
“Why
did your parents have an apartment in the cabin?”
“It
was supposed to be for me and my family. So we could all vacation there, but still have our privacy,” again she shrugged.
The
car started to move. We rounded the corner and I heard Vicky’s audible shock at the scene that lay before us.
Vicky
There
were so many people out front of the building that you could barely make out the cars that were parked in the parking lot. Next thing I know, Jake took off his suit jacket, pulled my head into his lap, threw the coat over my stomach and covered the rest of me with his body. The inside of the car had suddenly turned into a strobe light from camera flashes going off. My heart was pounding and these damn hormones had Jake’s name escaping in a sob.
“It’s
okay. I won’t let anything happen to you. Just stay down. Their wanting a money shot. They’re not getting anything until we’re ready to give it to them, okay?”
Even
though I knew he was telling me the truth, my tears and sobs still wouldn’t cease. They wracked my body bouncing Jake with each one. He repeatedly kissed me over and over on the stomach.
“We’re
out on the road. I think you’re safe. You need to tint these windows, Sir.”
“Yeah,
I know,” Jake said as he sat up, pulling me into his side. “Are you okay? Did I hurt you?”
All
I could do was shake my head. The tears still fell down my cheeks and my body continued to shake. For the first time in my life, I was scared, honest to goodness scared, for my life. Jake pulled me into a tight embrace as he kissed my head over and over again. After a few minutes, I ended up falling asleep.
“Shh,” Jake said as I started to stir.
Just
as I was opening my eyes, I heard the porch steps creak under him and I clung around his neck on a scream.
“You
shouldn’t be carrying me. I’m too big for you to carry.”
He
chuckled. “No you’re not.”
“Put
me down please,” I pleaded.
He
sighed, but set me on my feet. “Better?”
“Thank
you.”
“We’ll
get all the things from the cars. Go on inside.” A male voice spoke behind me.
I
screamed. Honestly, I wasn’t fully awake and I had completely forgotten for a moment about the crazy scene we just left behind in the doctor’s office. That is when something dawned on me.
“What’s
in the car? God, how long have I been sleeping?”
Jake
laughed again. “You’ve slept for about five hours. We took a detour and picked up groceries and some other odds and ends. I figured we should stay in for a little while. Let it die down some,” he said, dropping his eyes to the ground.
“Hey?”
He looked at me. “Everything’s going to be okay. My emotions are on high. I’m not upset with you at all.”
“But
that mob…”
“Didn’t
get me, nor did they get a desired picture they wanted either. Why didn’t they get that? Because you protected me, that’s why.”
“Excuse
me, Miss.”
“Oh!
That’s right! You need the apartment downstairs.”
Hurrying
inside, I grabbed the keys off the key rack by the utility closet. As I hurried back toward the door, Jake grabbed my hand.
“Will
you slow down?” He said, worriedly.
“Oh
please don’t tell me you are going to fret over everything I do now?”
“I
fretted over what you did before, it’ll just be worse now,” he grinned.
Smacking
him in the arm, I started outside. “I’m not sure the condition it’s in,” I said as everyone followed me. “I haven’t been down here since my father finished it. No one’s even stayed in it.”
When
we got around to the back of the house, the stairs were pretty much gone. Taking baby steps, I ignored Jake’s constant insistence that I stay at the top. Well, that was until I hit one spot and would have certainly fallen on the ground had Jake not caught me.
“Will
you please stop being a martyr and go back up? I don’t want anything happening to you guys.” He growled.
“Fine.
It’s this key,” I pointed to the key on the key chain. “There is also a door that leads up to the cabin so they can use it instead of this way, but I don’t remember where it leads out to in the cabin and I remember that dad sealed it until I was old enough to move in there when we came out.”
“We’ll
check it out. Dean, will you help her back up, then come back down so you can check out where you’re staying?”
“Yes,
sir.” Dean took my elbow and helped lead me back up.
I
huffed. “I’m not helpless,” I mumbled to myself.
“He
knows that, but this man has lost so much because of his career, he’s just afraid of losing you too.”
“Why
would he think he’d lose me?” I gasped.
“Because
of the craziness that surrounds his life. It won’t go away. He could walk away from the business all-together, but he’ll still have his success following. They’ll never leave him alone. It might not be as frenzied but they’ll still be there. The only ones that have stuck around through the crazy has been his family. He hadn’t cared too much about it until he met you. Then he… I’m sorry.”
“No,
please tell me,” I breathed.
“He
doesn’t feel worthy of you. Crazy as it sounds, but he doesn’t. It all boils down to the overt attention he receives. They spin stories however they see fit and what will drag in the most attention, whether it’s true or not.”
“Jake
mentioned that when we first met. Is it really true?”
“Yeah.
Here’s an example. Jake had walked out of filming a movie because his mom had been rushed to the hospital. For Jake, family has always come first. All companies know that when he signs. They accept it. The company, co-stars and crew all understood. They just started on filming the scenes that he wasn’t in. Next day in the papers, there was a front page headline that read, ‘Williams walks off set of movie because co-star wouldn’t sleep with him for real’. Jake is a lot of things, but one thing he never does is mix business and pleasure. Now, that didn’t mean he didn’t end up sleeping with his co-stars,” he cringed. “Sorry. He never did while they were filming. It was always after.”
“What
happened with the headline?”
“Jake
got in a lot of trouble because the co-star for this movie was only seventeen at the time. However, his dad took on the case and everyone backed him up and charges were dropped. Even with the dropped charges, it will always hang over his head. You know?”
“I
do,” I said as we reached the top. “But I’m not like that. I love Jake. I fought it for a while because
I
didn’t feel worthy of him. I, too, have a past. Part of it sits in jail because he almost killed me. I’ve never seen him as the superstar. Only as a man that seemed to speak to me in a way no man has since I can remember.” I smiled as I looked down the hill and saw him watching to make sure I made it up safely.
Dean
headed back down the hill and I walked around front. Just as I was headed inside, the ocean called my name. Changing direction, I headed down to the cove. Careful where I stepped, Jake would just kill me if I fell here. The thought made me laugh. Once I reached the cove, I sat down in the sand and looked out at the setting sun.
As
I sat and stared out at the serene picture before me, a thought occurred to me. I lived to make people whole again. What I hadn’t expected was to realize how broken I really was. When Jake came into my life, everything came into focus. For the first time in a long time, I was unable to hide behind the façade that I had built to get me through my days. Unable to look away from the mirror that was now before me, I had to look at myself, truly look at myself and my life. It was about time that I dropped my walls and took stock of my own life. Hell, I’ve made a career on making others do just that, yet I haven’t done it. In a way, I think I started by telling Adam I forgave him, but there was more in there I needed to handle. Just this time I hoped that Jake will be by my side.
“I
tell you not to come down to the apartment so you come down here,” Jake growled from behind me.
“Look,
I’ve walked down that path so much that I could do it with my eyes shut and still not fall. I was careful. I’m not broken, fragile or anything that needs reminding to be careful. I know you’re concerned for the babies, but suffocating their carrier won’t keep them any safer.”
He
sits down next to me. “Not just them.”
“What?”
I looked at him confused.
“I’m
not just concerned about them, but you too. I love you,” he said softly, brushing his hand down my cheek.
“You
know I never thought I’d hear you say those words. Never in my wildest dreams have I
ever
thought that you’d love little ol’ me.”
He
laughed. “It seems we both feel a bit unworthy. I’d say that makes us the perfect pair,” he smiled, but it just didn’t seem real.
“What’s
wrong?”
Jake
sighed. “Today, with the mob…”
“Jake,
will you stop with that. My emotions are a wreck, we just found out we’re having triplets… It was an overwhelming day. They just kind of took me over the edge. If you are worried that they are going to push me away from you…the answer is no. The only one that can do that is you. Are you doing that? Do you want me to leave?”
“God,
no! I’m just afraid it’s all going to be too much for you.”
“Nothing
is when you are with me. Hell, I can barely see outside of you when you’re around,” I joked to lighten the mood.
“You
have the same effect on me,” he smirked.
He
scooted behind me and wrapped me in his arms and legs. Resting his head on my shoulder, I leaned back against him and we watched the sun start to set and dance its amazing colors off the water.
“Wow!
This is yours?”
Turning
my head, I saw Dean coming down the path, Paco followed right behind. I smiled. “Yes, privately owned. The closest property is an hour away, but his place as a killer view of the cove and forest from a cliff.”
Jake
tensed around me. “An hour away. Do you talk to them often?”
I
sighed and turned slightly to look at his face. “Yes, it’s Casey’s property. I told you though there was nothing more between us. All we did was kiss. I couldn’t bring myself to sleep with him when my heart was still with you.”
“I
know. I just don’t even like the thought that someone else had their lips on you,” he huffed.
“Yeah,
well, at the time, you made it very clear to me that you wanted nothing to do with me,” I mumbled.
Tipping
my chin up with his hand, his eyes bore into mine. “I can never tell you how sorry I am for that. I wasn’t in the right frame of mind. Can you…”
“Already
forgiven or we wouldn’t be here right now. Before you even ask, I had all intentions of raising our child alone, never telling you. Yes, I know we are having children now, but at the time I thought it was only one.” I dropped my eyes and looked back up into Jake’s. “Casey’s a good guy. He was there for me when the one person I dared to love stomped on me like a bug on the ground. Casey kept me sane and gave me a reason to keep putting one foot in front of the other. If you should be anything toward him, it’s grateful and thankful.”
Jake
stared at me for a while before his mouth closed over mine in a slow, passionate kiss. “You’re right. I should be and I am. But I need to know something. Did you ever feel anything for him?”
“I
wanted to, prayed to, but I just couldn’t,” I answered honestly.
He grinned. “I’m glad to hear that.”
“
Don’t be an ass,” I bumped him with a small smile on my face.
“But
you like my ass,” he teased.
“As
much as you like mine,” I said as I struggled to get up.
“Sit
here for a bit longer, please.”
“It’s
getting chilly though.”
“I’ll
keep you warm,” he wrapped me tightly in his arms and legs, resting his hands on my belly.
We
sat there for a while just looking out over the water. Dean and Paco went into the water for a swim. It was funny watching those two swim. They were damn competitive. They had to be brothers, but Jake swears they are not.
“Vicky?”
My head snaps in the direction of the voice. “Casey? Hey, uh,” I struggled to get up.
“Hang on babe, let me help you,” Jake said evenly as he stood and pulled me up from the ground.
Walking over to Casey, I gave me a small hug. “Hey you,” I smiled at him.