Touch Me There (8 page)

Finger Action for Clitoral Pleasure

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EXERCISE 2.1:
Ride ’Em Cowgirl

1. Place your hand between her legs and cup her buttocks in your palm, resting your wrist and lower forearm against her vulva.
   
2. Ask her if she wants to “ride” your wrist or the heel of your hand, pressing herself against you. This allows her to control the pressure against her vulva and clitoris.
   
3. Soon after you’ve picked up on her rhythm, offer to take over, pressing your arm against her vulva as you massage other hot spots. If she wants to continue getting herself off, by all means, don’t in- terrupt!
   

As an alternative, instead of using your arm, slip your leg between her legs so that she can ride your thigh or knee.

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EXERCISE 2.2:
Playing Her Like a Twelve-String Guitar

1. Use the thumb and index finger of one hand to part her labia while moving your other hand’s index and/or middle finger in a gentle cir- cling motion around her clitoris. You’ll notice that, with increased arousal, her clitoris will become firmer. Her verbal and nonverbal re- actions will determine how much pressure you should use and how soon you may want to move on to step 2. If she enjoys this motion, stay with it for a while. If it becomes too much, move on to the next step. If it’s unclear what she’s experiencing, ask her.
   
2. Rub the clitoral shaft, moving up and down between the hood and base, keeping your movement firm and steady.
   
3. Intermittently, rock your fingertip back and forth across the glans, applying pressure directly on it or from the side (closer to the root), as though massaging your temples.
   
4. At any point, unless her clitoris is feeling super-sensitive, tap against the clitoris rhythmically with your finger(s) or hand. Depending on her preferred style of stimulation, she may enjoy a steady smacking or slapping action against her clitoris, but this action may be more bearable—yet still quite effective—if she has clothes on. You may also get more of a reaction if her mons pubis bears part of this love tap, as doing so will remove some of the force from her clitoris.
   

The clitoral hood can be regarded as its own hot spot since it, too, fills with blood during sexual arousal, as demonstrated in the following ex- ercise.

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EXERCISE 2.3:
What’s under Here? Getting to Know the Clitoral Hood

1. Rub the clitoris and clitoral hood gently between your thumb and index finger. Play around with it like one of those tiny scraps of paper you find yourself mindlessly rolling into a ball on occasion. However, be mindful of the finger action. Ask her if she’d like more or less pressure.
   
2. Give the clit a break every now and then by pulling the clitoral hood back and forth with your thumb and index finger. The friction cre- ated by this type of stimulation will be powerful, and you may find her catching her breath. Head nods from her are perfectly acceptable at this point when trying to gauge what feels good to her.
   
3. Carry on by holding and squeezing the clitoris between the thumb and index finger of one hand. Use the middle and ring fingers of either hand in a rubbing motion along the clitoral shaft. Note: Her clitoris may not be long enough for this move, and that’s okay.
   

Other moves you can use during clitoral stimulation may include arching your thumb backward to stimulate the clitoris while inserting your middle and ring fingers into her vagina. If you’re able to rhythmically provide pressure to the inner front wall of her vagina at the same time, you may trigger a reaction from her G-spot (which we’ll discuss in the next chapter). Longer hands may be able to simultaneously stimulate the rec- tal area in place of the vagina. When doing this, move the middle and ring fingers the same way you moved them in the vagina.

Always thoroughly wash the fingers and hands that you’ve used to stimu- late the anal area before inserting (or reinserting) them into the vagina. Failing to do so may transmit bacteria that can cause infection.

You can also try placing the heel of your hand on her mons pubis, ex- erting pressure as you move it back and forth during clitoral stimulation. This will create different sensations, especially in the clitoral hood’s

movements. Also, stroking, rubbing, or tugging at her inner and outer vaginal lips will produce a variety of feel-good reactions.

A woman does not experience a refractory period after orgasm, during which she is unable to become aroused again. Rather, she can experience her full sexual-response cycle again and again, making it possible for her to climax more than once. So don’t be afraid to stimulate the clitoris as much as she can handle it throughout the course of your sexual encounter.

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TIPS FOR FINGER PLAY
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