The Bare Necessities (Non-Profane Edition) (23 page)

Teri nodded. “I
know.” She looked at her hands and rubbed them together. “I have
spoken to Claire. But she says he wants to stay and … we're
shocked.”

“Yes, me too.”
Paul told her and rubbed his forehead. “'Cause we know your
daughter has been trying to seduce him.”

“Seduce him?” Teri
asked.

“Oh yes. Proper
trying it on. Anne caught them a few months ago. And that girl they
are with. Claire's friend, Paige. She's been selling drugs to my
daughter. Harriet's confessed all. And they are sharing double
beds. It's not on.”

“Paige? Really!”
Teri muttered and shook her head. “I'm so … sorry! I had no idea.
She seems such a lovely girl.”

“Right, well. I
want my son back here,” Paul demanded. “And I know Claire is the
key to this. She put him up to it, she introduced him to Paige, and
she's got him doing this ridiculous and outrageous jaunt.”

“Well Claire said
it was …”

“I don't care what
Claire said,” Paul shouted. “It's your bloody daughter that's
caused all these problems. I want my son back now.”

“I will tell her
to pass on your wishes.”

Paul sneered. “Oh
no. Because you are fired, until Claire returns and Jack is in this
house again.”

“Pardon?”

“You heard me. You
are fired until my Jack is returned.”

“Fired? But I
can't control my daughter,” Teri sobbed. “She's eighteen, and I've
been here for years.”

Paul shrugged.
“Then you better get your daughter back to Surrey pretty sharpish,”
he snapped and rubbed his furrowed brow. “Your daughter might want
to flaunt herself, but my son should not.” He straightened his
shirt. “He has a place at my firm.”

1. Chapter
   XVII
   

Paige yawned.
“You're not tired, surely?” Andre asked and then introduced the
three of them to the director.

“Sorry, I didn't
get much sleep last night.” Paige looked accusingly at Jack who
shrugged. “Someone was snoring.”

“Me? That's …”

“Shall we get on,”
Claire suggested before Jack could hurl any accusations in her
direction.

The bald-headed
director nodded. “Good idea. We've only got a day to film, and it's
tough.” He looked at Andre who was the “gopher” and then turned to
his two companions. Barry was firm, assertive and clear; he showed
the band the storyboard for their Don't Hate Us video and when
Claire wanted to change it, calmly explained that while she had “a
cracking idea,” they did not have the time or money to shoot her
much improved suggestion.

Paige stripped in
the cool weather; it was the coldest day for weeks and she shivered
in the wind as it whistled between the trees. Barry told Paige to
walk aggressively and animatedly barefoot through the wood, singing
as she went – although he promised her that they would use the
studio recorded version of their song for the audio track.

It took several
takes as Paige kept getting needles in her feet and would stop, so
Andre had to clear the small path of anything other than mud for
the shoot.

At lunchtime,
their agent was dispatched to acquire food, and in the afternoon
they filmed the second half of the video with Paige joining her two
colleagues in the middle of a clearing. The director was concerned
about lighting, and they had a couple of battery powered
floodlights, but this meant they only had a small period to film
the second half of their music video, and they felt a bit
rushed.

At the end of the
song, Paige tossed her microphone to Claire and strode away from
the group with exaggerated hand gestures as if she was annoyed with
them.

“Will that do?”
Paige asked as the director called 'cut.'

“One more time,”
Barry replied as he looked at the cameraman. “I got a guy coming in
for the rest of the week to edit, and I want to give him some stuff
to play with.”

“Fine,” Paige
called, and they returned to the clearing to film again. For Jack
and Claire it was weird to be “playing” their instruments as they
weren't plugged into a power source so made little noise, but the
Director wasn't bothered; he had the audio track from when they
recorded it in the studio and the video was just for show.

As evening
approached, the three drove to a small camp site just outside
Heathrow and Claire cooked up a weird concoction of peas, beans and
pasta for tea. “It's hardly haute cuisine,” Jack teased as he
finished Claire's creation.

“You always bitch
about the food,” Claire moaned and passed the pots to Jack. “So you
can clear up.”

“I always clear
up,” he moaned.

“Excellent,” Paige
cried. “Then you've had plenty of practice! You can do that while I
have a shower,” Paige demanded as she got up and showed Jack and
Claire her feet. They were black from the filming and the
unpredictable singer smiled at the guitarist. “You going to join
me? I hate going on my own on textile sites.”

* *
* * *

“We're on the
radio again,” Jack called excitedly as he came into their tent with
a small white device. They had chosen to have a day's holiday and
rest at a little camp site in Surrey before going to see Andre and
then visiting their families.

“What do you mean?
Airplay?”

“No,” Jack scoffed
and put his radio on the floor. “Peter bloody Moran. We are really
getting his goat!”

“... And of
course, they are a harmful influence, by being rebels like this,
they are encouraging teenagers to go naked. Already there has been
naked sit-ins in London, and we blame this silly fad on them. Why
they think we want to see them without any clothes on. I mean, have
some dignity, kids,” the voice ranted.

The female voice
agreed with him. “It's outrageous,” she told him.

“And no offence,
but that Claire, who wants to see her naked? She's fat, whoever
told her that she should get naked needs to go to Specsavers.” The
man laughed as he taunted the curvy musician. “And that Paige is
cheap scum.” Jack went to turn off the radio, but Paige knocked his
hand away.

“Leave it,” she
whispered to Jack and rubbed the knee of Claire. “And don't worry
what he says. He's the scum.”

“Yeah,” Claire
muttered and wiped her eyes.

“I've banned the
group in our house. Now the parents must take some of the blame.
What sort of education have they given their kids? It's a disgrace,
I don't know of anyone in the media who find their gimmicks
appropriate. They are cheap and disgusting and …”

Jack pushed
Paige's hand away and turned off the radio. “That's enough of
that,” he told her. “It's just Peter Moran. No-one listens to
him.”

“About two million
people listen to him,” Claire replied with tears forming in her
eyes.

“It's just him
being stupid. He'll move onto someone else in a few days. It's
nothing.”

“Yeah, storm in a
teacup,” Jack added. “Nothing to worry about, eh?”

“It wasn't you, he
called fat,” Claire spat with tears in her eyes.

“No, I was scum,”
Paige snapped. “Would you rather be scum?” Claire shook her head
and wiped her eyes. “I am not scum and you aren't fat,” Paige said
in a soft voice. “You've got a nice body. Hell, you've got bigger
tits than me and nice curves and … so what if a prat on the radio
says he doesn't like us. We don't like him.”

Claire snorted.
“I'm going to get some air,” she said and got up. Paige watched her
leave and went with her, but Claire sent her back to the tent.

“She used to be
anorexic,” Paige explained to Jack. “So being called fat is pretty
low.”

“Oh,” Jack replied
and put his head in his hands. “You know, there is a really simple
way out of this.

“Don't let the
bastards win,” Paige spat. “I want to get that Peter bloody Moran
and knock 'im into next week. Don't you?” Paige's eyes narrowed,
and she pointed out of the tent. “Our bandmate is really upset
'cause of what he says. Don't you feel anything?”

“Yeah,” Jack told
her. “But I don't want all the upset and fighting. And neither does
Claire.”

“Guess it's just
me then,” Paige told him. “Because there is no way someone gets to
do that to my friends or my family. If he wants a fight, he can
have one.”

“Paige, you can't
win this one.”

“Just watch me!
'Cause I play dirty. I thought my sister told you that.”

“You can't win
this one. And he'll destroy you if you try.” Paige snarled and
crossed her arms. “Promise me you won't do something stupid. Or
rash.”

“Sure,” Paige
replied airily, but her mind was already starting to whirr with
possibilities.

* *
* * *

Andre tapped his
office desk as they three stars walked in. “My favourite clients,”
he said when he saw them.

“Your only
clients,” Claire teased, and Andre shrugged. “But hey, that's good.
No-one else to compete with for your attention. No Uncle?”

“He's at the
bank,” Andre told them. “And I am the one working full-time on your
account! Come in, I have a video to show you.”

Andre waited for
the three teenagers to be seated and turned on the large television
screen behind them. He swore as he tried to connect the DVD player
and jabbed his finger, but eventually, a blue screen appeared and
then Paige's head emerged from behind the tree.

The music started,
and Paige stepped out and started walking towards the camera,
gesturing wildly with her arms. When it reached the chorus, she
“kicked” the camera causing the camera to point towards the trees
and then refocus on a clearing where Paige and the rest of the band
were playing.

Paige thought it
was a good video. It may have lacked the blockbuster production of
top artists, but it was fun, upbeat and fit in with their
fast-paced song, as well as their cheeky persona, exceptionally
well.

“You like?”

The three of them
looked at each other. “It's good,” Paige muttered and nodded.

“Bit late if you
don't,” Andre replied with a coy smile as he crossed the room to
sit down on his chair. “We've finished filming. It needs a few
extra tweaks. I've also licensed the three covers you made.” He
looked at Claire. “You said you hadn't licensed them, so I've done
that.”

“Right.”

“Yes, that's done,
and the album, song, and video all hit the shelves tomorrow.”

“Wow! You have
been busy,” Claire replied, clearly impressed, and he looked at the
black-haired girl with a smile on his face.

“I have. But …” He
muttered, and Paige looked at Claire.

“But you two have
been talking every day, right?” Paige asked.

Claire nodded.
“Yeah. Well, we do need to talk. And you two are always off doing
something.” Her tone wasn't accusatory, but both Jack and Paige
objected to her inference.

“And it does show
that I don't need to be naked, Paige, to understand you.”

“I would say that
you've done a very good job,” the lead singer admitted. “And that's
only been possible because I got you naked that night. Don't deny
it!”

The agent did deny
Paige's assertion, but he ran through some requests he had received
for them and, with the meeting concluded, shook their hands as they
left. The three of them walked in silence to Jack's car; they were
about to see their families for the first time in weeks.

* *
* * *

“Hiya Mum,” Claire
called into the house. “Dad? George?” She heard a sound and looked
up the stairs to see her Mum on the landing.

“Claire? Oh,
you're home.” Claire held her arms out, and her mother almost fell
down the staircase to greet her daughter. “We've missed you.”

“Yeah … and I've
missed you. But we've had a great time and …”

“I know. I saw the
news.” Her mother's expression changed, and she hugged the
eighteen-year-old.

“Ahh yeah that,”
Claire muttered meekly; her phone calls home had dried up as their
notoriety had risen. “But we have an agent now. And a proper video
and a single in the charts.”

Her mother bit her
lip. “That's good,” she told her. “Really good.”

“What?” Claire
asked. “What is it?”

“Nothing,” her
mother told her, and Claire pushed her away to stare at her in the
eye. “OK. I lost my job because of you and Jack going out.”

“What? There is no
me and Jack. Paul said something 'bout this when he came to see
Jack, what's me got to do with it?”

Teri Baynes
groaned. “Because Paul and Anna think you led Jack into this and
that he is running around naked because of you.”

“But that's not
true,” Claire snarled. “That's totally not true. It was more Paige
than me.”

“I know, look, it
doesn't matter. I've had some interviews but …”

“But what?”

“Well Paul told
one family who offered me a job that I had been sacked for stealing
and …”

“The little sod,”
Claire exclaimed and then had to apologise for her language. “This
isn't on.” Claire picked up her phone and dialled a number.

“Don't,” her
mother begged. “Now that you are back it should be better.”

Claire hummed. “We
aren't splitting up,” Claire told. “This is just the
beginning.”

“Claire, please,”
Teri pleaded, but Claire put the phone to her ear to talk to
Jack.

* *
* * *

The figure of
Suzanne Simmons loomed over Paige, and she bit her lip. “Hi
Mum.”

“Come here,” she
cried and hugged her daughter with tears in her eyes. “We're so
proud of you.”

“You don't … you
don't … care about it?”

She smiled and
shook her head. “No, I don't care. But Dad. Well Dad's not quite so
happy.”

“No?”

“Well,” she
hesitated. “He always keeps his naturism a bit secret and now he
can't. Everyone knows and he's had some awkward questions.”

“Where is he?”

“He is helping
with the repairs at the clubhouse. Staying for a couple of nights.”
Paige sighed.