Shampoo (35 page)

I remained quiet.

(except for the
sniffles)

“
I’ve just never had to
do it before, you know, I’m struggling with it.”

“
That’s the problem,
Ever,” I said. “It shouldn’t BE a struggle. It should be easy. And
fun. Not like this.”

“
But it IS fun with
you, woman. That’s the thing. When we’re not arguing, you’re the
most fun I’ve ever fucking had.”

That’s when my heart OFFICIALLY
shattered. It just laid down on the floor, broken, and died a hard
death. I followed suit, laying my head down on the hall floor. I
was broken.

“
All the guys LOVE you,
cause you’re SO MUCH FUCKING FUN, you’re not like other girls.
You’re like a guy.” Pause. “EXCEPT for this crap.”

“
You’d hear this from
ANY girl, Everard – ”

“
I know. Trust me, I
KNOW. But you’re not any girl.”

“
So you expect better
of me?”

He laughed. “Yeah. Kind of. Just
stay YOU. You are PHENOMENAL as you. You are…a LIGHT. A shining,
FUCKING FUN, so fucking sweet, light. THAT’S who I…care about. A
lot.”

I cried harder. He was right
-

(I am phenomenal!!)

I’m starting to lose myself in
this not-relationship. I don’t want to BE this person. I’m NOT a
nag. I’m a free spirit.

(out of my way, I’m a free
spirit)

But I don’t want to be taken
advantage of either, and not get what I want.

“
Don’t cry,” he
gruffed out. “I can’t bear when you cry.” Pause, as I tried to
reign it in. “Hope you’re staying home tomorrow, you sound
awful.”

“
No, I’m going to work
– ”

“
What!! You NEED to
take care of yourself. You get sick very easily – ”

“
I love when you’re
like this, Ever,” I said softly.

“
I know.”

“
Gives me
goosebumps.”

“
I’d like to give you
more goosebumps. In person.”

I started spluttering.

“
You’re a mess,
woman.”

“
I want YOU to be a
mess, Everard. Over me.”

“
Oh, I am. I just don’t
show it. I keep it close to me. Where it matters.”

And that is why I keep hanging on
to him. Moments like that.

Saturday 4 November
2000

6.02pm

Ever called ALL WEEK at work, dead
on 4.30pm.

And he sounded loving AGAI
N!!

What is going on.

He pretended to be Stefan on one
of the phone calls, doing a near-perfect imitation of Stefan. I
burst into laughter, cause I knew it was him, plus we don’t stock
Stefan.

(Stefan stocks Stefan)

So all those phone calls made me
so happy I went straight from work to Indro Thursday, and bought
his birthday present.

A Jag watch for $400.

Now I feel pretty stupid for
spending that much money, cause now he hasn’t called in two
days!!

I’m trying to stay cool, STAY ME,
but I’m hurt already that I haven’t heard from him in 2
days.

I just don’t want to care anymore.
I just don’t want to feel!!

Work was busy Friday. Julia was
eating this banana and turning it into the most comical thing ever.
Pretending to give it a blow job and making these sensual noises.
Was so fucking funny.

Then John Cash yelled out from his
office, “Julia, I don’t know what you’re doing to that banana, but
I’m pretty sure it could be construed as harassment. Banana might
sue.”

And Julia then started choking on
the banana she’d just bitten off, and oh my God, was the fucking
funniest thing ever. I was on the floor in fits. While Julia choked
and laughed and gestured for someone to give her the Heimlich
manouever.

(nobody did. We all just laughed
ourselves stupid)

Then Richard came into work at
5.30pm, looking (and smelling) so frickin’ spiffy and freshly
showered, his hair slicked back, and sporting his muscles and
tatts.

Rich arrived to me, Melissa, Joy
and Benny drinking upstairs in the office, me still at my
desk.

Angela Jones arrived then to hand
me her salon orders, that I quickly typed in, as Lachie came
upstairs. Him and Angela are close, you can tell Lach is the only
warehouse person Angela considers ‘her own’…and there’s been talk
Lach has been pressuring John Cash to make him a rep, instead of
Warehouse Manager.

Lach would ROCK as a rep…he’s so
cool, and surfy and hot and fun! His head is already big enough
though…I can imagine what becoming Rocking Shampoo Rep would do to
him.

(he’d become Daryl
Agnew)

Melissa and I were (drunk!)
giggling madly by this stage, and we soon piled into Joy’s car,
while Angela grabbed me as I was trying to get into the backseat
with Benny and Rich, and asked me, “Who’s the hot biker guy,
Pinky??” while Lachlan leaned over her shoulder, with THE funniest
expression on his face.

Lach has this way of pulling
faces, that is so damn comical. He can just pull a face or a look
and crack me up with it.

He was doing it then, over
Angela’s shoulder. “Yeah, Pinky, who is he??”

“
He’s just my best
mate, you two!!” I replied, giving Angela a kiss on her check then
leaning over and trying to exaggerate a kiss to Lach but he leaped
away, squealing.

I looked back out the window as we
drove off, and Angela and Lach were doing their usual flirt/respect
each other/deep inspirational talk with lots of laughs thrown
in.

I grinned as they got smaller. I
love when I really know people, and can spot the connections
between people – like the genuine love between Lachie and Ange. It
makes me all warm and fuzzy when I can spot these connections with
people. And when these people act the same way all the time, it’s
comforting to me.

I adore Angela and Lach. I love
their special friendship. I love watching them together.

Into the city we went, where Ryan,
Paul and his girlfriend, Little Jon and Lachie and Melinda
(eventually) met us in there.

We had the BEST TIME.

Benny and I laughed together and
mucked around all night, and he was the one who (as USE-YOU-ALL)
picked me up off the floor when I kept falling over
drunk.

He was the one holding me up by
the end of the night too.

Benny’s so sweet. He’s like this
big, giant protector. He’s a bit dreamy, old Benny, with his
romance hero height and protective nature.

And I had Rich to cuddle with,
too!! He seemed to have fun. He dropped his pants in Mary St, which
is his signature move on drunken nights out. Oh my God, how we
laughed.

I love happy, fun nights
out!!

I had to get up early and drive
Rich home this morning, then be at hairdressers at
8.30am.

Rich was SO ILL on the drive home,
and I felt drunk still, and kept being off with the (intoxicated)
fairies and missing turns and exits.

Rich was all, “Ugh,
I’m GONNA BE SICK – ” and me going round and round a roundabout,
missing the exit each time, and Rich hollering, “THIS ISN’T FUCKING
HELPING!!!” and me laughing hysterically as I missed the exit
AGAIN, and spluttering, “Oh, PAYBACK’S A BITCH for me if you hurl
in my car!!” and right as I said that and took the exit and stopped
going round and round, Rich hurled out my window then started
laughing madly as we watched his vomit streak all down the window
he’d barely managed to wind down.

I couldn’t stop laughing. “If I could find a
way to make Dan clean that up, I would!!!”

I’m sure I was a fire hazard at the
hairdressers. All that booze seeping out my skin plus all the
chemicals in my hair.

Nobody light a match near me.

Then I went straight to Joy’s for another
aromatherapy party. Two of Joy’s friends were there with their
babies, and Joy’s kids, Pheebs, Nigel and Issac. Had such a lovely
afternoon. I love Joy, she’s so bright and bubbly and loving and
kind. Not to mention fun!!! We were talking about what a great
night last night was.

Her home is like an orange and pink Indian
sari. So tranquil and calming, depite the bright colours. A real
sanctuary.

I love being there.

7.21pm

Evvy called. Asked me to go to Josie’s with
him.

Unbelievable!!!

I wish I could, but I literally can’t move
after going out last night and all day today.

Think I’m still drunk, too.

Plus tomorrow is the Wet and Wild Day with
work. I’ve got to rest.

Monday 6 November 2000

7.43pm

I think yesterday may have been THE BEST DAY of
my life.

The Wet and Wild Day was awesome!!!

Me and Benny, Nat and Dan, and Lachie and
Melinda went on everything together, and stuck together like
glue.

Being in a group with these people really is
FUN!!!

Mammoth Falls was the MOST FUN EVER, all of us
in this giant round raft, and Lachie and Benny acted like ten year
old boys who know all the daredevil tricks, and scared the bejesus
out of us all.

I think Dan was even scared. Which
is saying something.

Melinda just kept
screaming/laughing, an ear-piercing combination of both, while
Lachie and Benny knew the exact spots to pull moves that made our
raft LITERALLY go up the slide’s walls and we were airborne!! Past
the slide’s fucking walls!!

I thought we were gonna
die.

We were SO HIGH UP.

I eventually grabbed Benny, like
he was my boyfriend or my responsibility

(in our pairing off of the day, he
kinda was!),

and screamed, “If you do that ONE
MORE TIME, BENNY, I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!!!!”

Lachie laughed EVILLY and Benny
suddenly pushed all his weight down the front of the raft so we hit
the water HARD at the bottom of one of the slide’s caverns, and an
ocean full of water hit me

(and only me)

full in the face.

I practically drowned while
everyone laughed and Melinda kept screaming.

“
I’m sorry, Pinky,”
Benny laughed, grabbing me and plucking me out of the bottom of the
boat, where I was drowning in two feet of water. “Here, sit in my
lap and I won’t do it anymore.”

“
Like that’s a
punishment for you!” I spluttered, trying to get the water out of
my lungs.

“
It is,” Benny laughed,
his arms wrapping around me and holding me against him. “It’s
AWFUL. Make it stop!”

Lachie laughed till he cried.
Melinda kept screaming.

I must admit, it was HOT sitting
in Benny’s lap and his arms around me the rest of the
ride.

Too hot for me to even go into in
great detail. I’m like fanning myself right now.

(oh dear oh dear, SUPER
HOT)

Melinda and I went on the two
person tube ride together, and she laughed and screamed

(at the same time, her special
trick)

so loud in my ear the whole way,
which just made me laugh till I couldn’t breathe.

We all settled in the wave pool at
the end of the day, which was so frickin’ fun for something so
simple – just a huge body of water that constantly produces rolling
waves.

The funniest thing – trying to get
on the tubes. So unexpectedly complicated in the moving water. Took
us all like half an hour to get on them. Then Lachie, who hadn’t
gotten on a tube yet, kept swimming around us like a cheeky shark,
waiting till we’d finally climbed on, then tipping us off. So it’d
take us another half hour to get back on our tubes.

Then Lachie couldn’t get on his
own tube – now THAT was funny. He kept making that painful slipping
sound as his skin dragged over the tube as he kept sliding back
into the water.

“
Karma’s a bitch!!!” I
laughed, from my lovely spot bopping away on my tube.

I don’t think I’ve laughed that
hard in ages.

Paul and his girlfriend and Ryan
and his girlfriend joined us in the wave pool, and somehow the
discussion turned to me finding a boyfriend.

(everyone always takes such an
interest in my love life. I have no idea why!! It’s not that
interesting)

“
I know who your next
boyfriend is,” Paul declared, floating past me.

“
Benny!” Lachlan and
Paul both said at the same time.

“
Aw, you’ll make me
blush!!” Benny yelled as he floated away.