Scars of the Present (8 page)

Chapter Eleven

By mid-June, loneliness didn’t creep up often as I fell into a new routine. Although Maddie and Amanda continued to be scarce around the apartment, David would spend nights with me whenever Claire was with her mom or he was on call overnight. I had also started volunteering at the hospital five days a week and enjoyed it a lot more than I thought I would. It wasn’t lifesaving work, by any means, but I liked learning and working the different admit desks throughout the building. By my second week, I had helped implement a few different systems to help office filing be more organized, and we had figured out a different way for patient check-in to be a smoother process. I was proud of the work I had done and I finally realized that my business degree meant more than working for an insurance company.

“I want to take you out,” David said one night as his hand moved up and down my naked back.

I propped my chin on his chest and looked up at him. “Out?”

“Yes, out,” he chuckled. “I want to take you beyond these four walls. Get some dinner, maybe dance or see a movie. As much as I love having you naked as often as possible, I think we could benefit from the fresh air.”

My heart thudded in my chest at his words and I felt a little anxiety bubble in the back of my mind. I have only been on a handful of dates in my life and this sounded oddly like a real date.

“Tink, deep breath,” David’s hand left my back and moved to my face to cup my cheek. “We don’t have to if it freaks you out.”

I just stared at him for a minute and shook my head quickly. “No, I want to. I just don’t remember the last time I went some place other than a fundraiser with a guy.”

He moved us so he was hovering over me and a small smile touched his lips. “Well, we need to change that and make sure it’s memorable this time.”

The following Friday I stood in front of the mirror in my bedroom and nitpicked my appearance. The summer dress I was wearing was sleeveless and made out of a material that resembled light green lace. I pulled the decorative belt around my waist and slid into a pair of white heels before letting out a sigh. I wasn’t sure if this was a proper ‘date outfit’ but it was too late to change my mind now. I grabbed my purse and moved into the living room where Amanda was eating some leftovers and watching a movie.

“Hey, you look great, Syd.” She gave me a smile and set her plate on the coffee table.

“Are you sure? I feel like I’m either overdressed or underdressed, but I’m not quite sure which one.” I self-consciously ran my hands down my dress.

Amanda just looked at me with disbelief on her face, not saying anything.

“What? Oh hell, I am overdressed, right?” I moved towards the bedroom and Amanda burst out laughing. I whipped back around to look at her and I realized I was wearing a frantic expression.

Amanda stood and came over to pull me into a hug. “I have never seen you like this. You are always the coolest cucumber with the ‘who gives a shit?’ attitude. You must care about him more than you let on.” She pulled away and ran a hand over my hair in a motherly way. “You look perfect.”

She moved back to the couch and I joined her, watching the movie but not really processing it. Right at six o’clock, a knock sounded on the door. I inhaled deeply and pulled it open with a forced smile on my face.

David stood there in a pair of nice jeans, the sleeves on his light blue dress shirt were rolled up his forearms, and he was wearing a genuine smile.

“Tink, you look gorgeous.” He stepped through the doorway and leaned close to give me a chaste kiss. “Are you ready to go?”

I nodded and picked up my purse from where I had dropped it on the couch. “See you later, Amanda.”

She grinned and gave a wave. “Have fun you two.”

David returned her wave. “Hi and bye, Amanda.”

He brought his arm around my waist and pulled the passenger door open for me, waiting until I was in to close it and come around to his side.

“Quit being so nervous, Sydney. It’s no different than what we normally do except with clothes. And other people.” He steered the car out to the street and weaved our fingers together before settling his hand in my lap.

We drove through the familiar downtown portion of Sacramento and he pulled his SUV in front a restaurant, putting it into park as the valet walked over to hand him a ticket. Another valet pulled my door open and I stepped out as David came around to take my hand.

We walked in the door and the host gave David a smile before we had even made it to the podium. “Hello Detective. It’s good to see you again- we already have your table ready.”

He led us through the restaurant to a table in the back and I let David lead me as I admired the gorgeous dining room. The crystal chandeliers that hung from the ceiling were ornate and set the atmosphere in the room perfectly. The restaurant was a perfect mix of fancy and classy from the oil paintings on the walls to the white lace tablecloths on the tables.

David held out my chair for me and moved around to sit in his own, the smile still fixed on his face. “Do you like it?”

“It’s beautiful. You picked well.”

He grinned and nodded his head. “Funny story. The host who seated us invited me here. I met him a few weeks ago when his car stalled in the left turn lane on Sage and Main. I was on my way to work and stopped to help him push it out of the intersection and into a parking lot. He was pretty grateful and he told me to look him up if I ever needed a good place to take my lady for a date night.”

There was no end to David’s perfectness, and I just smiled as he told the story. He laughed when he saw me shaking my head slightly.

“What?”

“Oh nothing,” I shrugged and let out a small chuckle. “You’re just too good to be true, Bradley.”

The server appeared to greet us and poured some wine before giving us time with the menus.

After we had placed our order for food, David and I spent the time chatting easily, and soon my nerves were completely gone.

“Tell me something I don’t know,” I said after our food came.

“Like what?”

“Just something about yourself. I don’t feel like I know much about you other than that you’re a 26-year-old detective, with a therapist sister, and an adorable child.” I took a sip of my wine and looked at him expectantly.

He chuckled and just gazed at me for a moment. “Well,” he said after a long pause. “Sarah and I grew up all over the area. Our mom died when I was really little, and our father was a drug addict, so we ended up in foster homes a lot.”

I didn’t respond, the news of him being a foster child took me by surprise. In my mind, I had always seen foster kids as the more unsettled type, not like the nurturing and independent man before me.

“Sarah’s two years old than me,” he continued. “But she took on the role as my mother, and we managed to get placed together four out of the five homes we had. I’d like to say we were good kids, but we kept getting moved for crappy reasons- money, drugs, sex, or other kids. The fourth home is when they separated us, and that was the hardest home for Sarah. She changed after that one and became more hardened. She was sixteen when they put us back to together for the final home. When Sarah aged out she got a job, a small apartment, and petitioned the courts until they gave her custody of me. She refused to let me get a job and instead made me finish high school first. She took night classes at the college and busted her ass to get her degrees.”

David smile and reached across the table for my hand. “My childhood wasn’t easy but it wasn’t hard. I felt loved at all times because Sarah made it so. She was so determined to help people get over the crap we witnessed and I decided I wanted to try to stop it before it began.”

I just stared at him in awe, not even knowing how to respond. He was the epitome of the perfect man and I felt overwhelmed that he was sitting here with me.

The conversation turned a bit lighter, but I told him a little bit about growing up with my mom. I felt dumb complaining about it when he had had it so much worse.

Being with him was easy, almost natural, and when dinner was over he stood and took my hand in his. We waited for the valet to return with his car, and he looked down at me.

“How good are you at bowling?”

I laughed and shook my head. “I definitely wouldn’t say that I’m good.”

“Great, me either. Let’s go bowling.”

I cheered and did a little dance as the last pin fell over, and David stood behind me shaking his head with a smile on his face.

“You’re a little liar, Tink. You’re great at this.”

I shrugged my shoulders and gave him a smug look. “Right. I’m great. I just said I wasn’t good. Amanda’s dad used to take us bowling once a month. I may have picked up some things then.”

The bowling alley was crowded since it was Saturday night, but I didn’t notice anyone except David. He and I had matching shoes that were probably the ugliest things I’d put on my feet in years, and the air inside was stuffy and stale. But I didn’t care. I couldn’t even remember why I had been so nervous earlier that evening, and I couldn’t remember the last time I had so much fun with someone that wasn’t Maddie or Amanda.

David, who seemed to be great at everything, was not the best bowler, and his fake pouts were amazingly sexy. By the eighth frame I couldn’t help teasing him.

“We can add the bumpers to your name if that would help,” I said innocently as I moved to roll my ball down the lane.

It was just getting ready to leave my fingers when David wrapped his arms around my waist and lifted me from behind. I squealed in surprise as my ball shot into the gutter, and he laughed triumphantly as he kept his arms around me. I turned in his hold and tried to glare at him, but a laugh fell from my lips instead.

“You’re such a cheater.” I reached my hands around his neck and pulled him down to meet my lips for a moment before someone spoke from behind us.

“Syd?”

We broke apart, but David’s hands didn’t leave my waist as I turned my head to look at Sean.

“Hey Sean.” I suddenly felt like a kid who’d be caught doing something wrong, and even though I squirmed, David’s grip didn’t let up. “Are you here bowling too?”

He nodded and gestured to the lanes on my right. “I’m a few down with some friends from work.”

“Oh, fun. Um, you know David right? Well, Detective Bradley.” I stammered in the awkwardness.

David turned us so that we were facing Sean, keeping his left hand on my hip as he extended his right. “Just David, please. Good to see you again, Sean.”

Sean accepted the handshake and gave a stiff nod. “Yeah, you too, Detective.” He brought his eyes to mine and I could see the hurt in them. “I didn’t realize you two were together.”

My chest ached and I wanted to reach out and comfort him. When I didn’t speak, David filled the silence. “It’s fairly new.”

Sean didn’t acknowledge David’s words and instead his eyes searched my face before he gave me a small smile. “I need to get back to my friends. It was good seeing you, Syd.” He finally glanced at David. “Detective.” He walked back down the lanes to rejoin his group of friends.

I stood frozen where I was, unable to move as I watched Sean’s retreat. Finally, David pulled me over to the bench and sat me down before pushing a bottle of water into my hands

“Drink, Sydney.”

I took a sip of water and turned my head to meet David’s gaze. “Did you see how hurt he looked?”

David didn’t respond right away, and instead he kept his arm around my shoulder as he stared off at nothing.

“Do you want me to back off and let you explore what could be with Sean?”

“No!” I said it so quickly that I surprised myself and I could tell I had shocked David too.

The corners of his mouth tipped up and he leaned down to kiss me sweetly. “I’m sure you’ve unknowingly broken a lot of hearts over the past few years, Tink. It’s harder because you care about Sean, but he’ll be okay. It’s better than you let him go and have a chance at his own happiness instead of stringing him along when there’s no hope.”

That’s exactly what I had been telling myself, but it felt good to have someone agree with me.

“Yeah, I know. I still hate that I hurt him.”

David stood and pulled me to my feet. “That’s because you’re a good person, Sydney. Do you want to go ahead and go?”

I shook my head and moved to grab my ball from the ball return area. “You have two more frames to try to catch up. Why would I take that opportunity from you?”

When we made it back to my apartment, David walked me to the door but declined when I mentioned coming in.

“Sarah could only babysit for the evening, so I need to get back home.” He traced the side of my face with his finger, and I let out a comfortable sigh. “I had a great time with you tonight, Tink.”

I grinned and ran a hand up his chest before it settled at his shoulder. “So did I, David. Thank you so much.” I hesitated and bit my lip for a moment. “Earlier, you asked if you should step back so I could be with Sean…”

David’s face froze and after a second he gave a sharp nod. “Did you reconsider?”

“No,” I replied quickly, shaking my head to emphasize my point. “I just don’t want you to think there are any unresolved feelings that I have for Sean, because there aren’t. What I feel for you, whatever this is, is stronger than I have ever felt for anyone.” What I felt that moment was idiotic as I made the declaration, and my cheeks burned with shyness suddenly.

He didn’t respond for a moment as his eyes searched my face quickly. He slammed his lips to mine, and we kissed passionately on the ‘Welcome’ mat under we were both out of breath.

“You can’t come in for even a minute?” I asked as my shoulders heaved.

He shook his head and leaned down to capture my lips with his own, gently this time. “If I come in I probably won’t leave,” he whispered against my lips. We stood on the porch until our kissing started to intensify again and David finally stepped back.

“You’re like a miniature seductress, Sydney. I lose my head when I’m around you.”

I leaned back against the door and smirked at him. “I was just kissing you, that’s all.”

“Uh huh. That’s all.” He stepped forward and gave me a peck on the forehead before moving to leave. “Goodnight, beautiful. I’ll call you tomorrow.”

I nodded and held my hand up in farewell. “Goodnight, David.”

I was pushing through the front door when he called my name. I turned back around curiously, and he was back at the top stair.

“I want to introduce you to Claire soon. I mean, a real introduction. Maybe let you two get to know each other a little. Does that scare you?”

I didn’t answer for a moment, and even though my heart was beating at an accelerated rate, I realized it didn’t scare as much as I thought it would.

“Only a little.”

“A little is better than a lot.” He laughed and moved to give me one more kiss. “It doesn’t have to be right away, I just wanted to put that out there to see how you felt.”

I nodded and smiled at him. “She’s a huge part of your life. I get it.”

“Good. Sweet dreams, Tink.”

And with that he disappeared down the stairs.