Good Girl (Playroom) (21 page)

One downside to hard work is that
boys like to emulate their hero. Weston and Seth are bare-chested, much to the disgust of every lady present. Sweaty, prepubescent boys are really gross and smelly. Some dumb-ass pheromone receptors in my libido find Devon’s stink intoxicating. I’m the only one, though. Sweaty boys of any age think it’s fun to shove their nasty armpits in girls’ faces. Rae nearly puked when Devon did it to her, but no, I got achy. What the fuck is wrong with me? Seth’s stink had me appropriately gagging my guts up, though.

I leave
the bigger people to attack the furniture after I run out of things I can lift. I start in the front corner of the house. It’s the biggest room on the first floor. I think it would have been called the parlor when the house was built. The last owner- hoarder- used it for storage. Hideous pea-green carpeting is from wall-to-wall. I decide I don’t need to be strong to tackle that.

This is something
that I actually know what I’m doing. Sam was a carpenter in profession and Seth and I were his little helpers. This won’t be the first carpet I’ve torn up, but it will be the first I tackle with a sob lodged in my throat as the memories try to bombard me.

Auggie was nice enough to drop off a few bucket
s of tools by the front door. It’s either that, or he came in here, put his tools down, and gave the fuck up and left. I vote for gave up.

I grab a utility knife and crowbar and attack the carpet
with a vengeance. Pent-up frustration oozes out of my pores with every slash of the blade until I’ve cut the corner away. Old carpet always has tack strips. You have to expose the strip to get your fingers under the carpet, and then pull like a bastard. Devon finds me when I’m in the center of the room rolling the foul smelling carpet into a big tube.

“What’s wrong?” Devon
asks after he single-handedly tosses the roll onto his shoulder and dumps it in the foyer in the bonfire/garbage pile. I’m not sure how, but Devon reads my emotions like a Geiger counter measures radiation. Judging by the worried look he keeps tossing my way, he thinks my nuclear reactor is about to blow.

“I was told that I wasn’t a guest of the
Playroom
. My dubious invite was rescinded.” I hollowly mumble as I attack the carpet strips with the crowbar. Underneath that horrible carpet was beautiful hardwood floors. Will be beautiful. Right now they need to be sandblasted and refinished.

“What t
he fuck?” Devon asks in surprise.

“That’s exactly what I said
,” I growl in frustration. “Auggie’s there right now, most likely fucking someone. I don’t know why he didn’t just say that it’s his place to go to get away from me. We’re together 24/7 now. I’d understand. Hell, he owns it. Auggie probably has actual work to do. But instead, Auggie treats me like I’m retarded.” I get extra mean on a stubborn strip.

“Does it bother you that Auggie
’s playing right now?” Devon settles next to me on the floor and uses his strong fingers to pry up a tack strip. Showoff!

“No, it doesn’t
,” is my immediate reply. I slump down on my haunches and get real, “Maybe a little,” I finally admit. I take a deep breath and decide to go for broke. “I know I’m not Auggie’s girlfriend, but the mixed signals are killing me. Auggie says reality and play are separate. He made sure I knew I wasn’t his girlfriend. Tonight he told me I wasn’t invited because he’s my boss, Master, and the owner of the club. Then why have me move in with him? Why have me share his bed and play in his bed if play and reality are separate? Right now, I don’t know what I am to him. Am I his employee, roommate, or pet? All I know for positive is that I’m not Auggie’s girlfriend. Everything else is a huge fucking contradiction.”

“I’m sorry, Willo
w,” Devon says in a strained voice. I don’t dare look at him to figure out what that sharp tone meant. Maybe he thinks this is an inappropriate conversations between budding friends. After all, Auggie is a friend of his, too.

“Well, at least I know you’re my friend because you want to be. I know two of those idiots out there are my blood. I know that I love this shithole and will try my damnedest to do what
ever I can to fix it. That’s good enough. I have friends, relatives, a house and a job. Does it really matter what label I slap on Auggie?”

Total silence. Devon just stares at me like I’m a total stranger. “
What?” I finally ask of the weird expression on Devon’s face and his disturbing silence.

“I
… I’m glad. I thought Auggie and you were together- together. It creeped me out that either one of you would want me to hang out with you. And that Auggie expected me to have sex with you. It was creepy. I didn’t want to be the guy you used as practice,” Devon grumbles.

“Yeah, creepy is one word for it. You’re in t
he Spook House right now,” I ominously announce. “Devon, I don’t expect you to do anything, just be yourself around me. You’ll never be just practice to me. Okay?”

“Okay,” Devon
quietly murmurs while looking at his hands. “We’ve got to go. I’ll see you tomorrow sometime. I have nothing but time until my duty starts next year. So I’ll put in some hours here during the day. See ya around.”

The five of them disappear with a quick wave, leaving me all alone in the Spook House. I realize something
, and I’m not sure if I want to cry or smile. Devon only touches me when Auggie is around. Devon really does only want to be my friend. Devon was only being touchy-feely because it was required of him, and when I gave Devon a way out, he took it. I don’t blame him, though.  The ten year old boy look isn’t for everyone. But I’m glad to have a true friend, one who isn’t required by blood to like me.

***

“I looked all over for you,” Auggie says in exhaustion. I hadn’t heard him come in, and I have no idea how long he’s been sitting on the floor. I almost cut Auggie’s boot with the utility knife when making a pass through the carpet.

“Well, I said I’d be h
ere. I guess it would be where you’d expect me to be,” I snidely say.

“You’re mad at me,” Auggie
hopelessly says.

“Disappointed in you-
not mad.” I brush my hair away from my face and sigh.

“What?” He sounds surprised.

“Auggie,” I slump to the floor and face him. “I’m at a loss. I don’t know what is up or down. I feel like I’ve aged ten years in the past couple days. You’ve made it clear that we aren’t a couple, and I accept that. A week ago I was a seventeen year old virgin, living at home with my parents, and working for my brother’s best friend.

“Willow-”

“Hold up,” I raise my arm to stop whatever Auggie was going to say. “Let me finish. I don’t expect you to change your life for me. I’m someone in your life, not a part of it. You don’t need to tell me where you’re going or why. I just don’t want lied to. I thought you were my lover or my friend, but you’ve made it crystal clear that you’re only my boss and I’m your pet. Don’t disrespect me by confusing me, and then calling me an idiot for not understanding things I don’t know.”

“I…” Auggie
gives me that
I don’t know you
look and stammers. “Willow, I want you to be a kid. You need to go on dates and goof off and fuck boys your own age. I’m a grown man, and even though your birth certificate says you’re old enough to be a grown woman- you’re not,” he sadly states, and I wince in pain.

“Harsh,” I
deeply breathe when my lungs fail to function from the cruel, verbal blow Auggie dealt me. “I know that I look younger than I am, and I act like it sometimes, too. But I’m not going to change my personality in hopes you’ll like me. I learned a lot fast with what happened with Kieren. I do trust your judgment. I think before I act now. I think ‘what would Mr. Kline do?’ and make the right choice. I haven’t earned your trust yet. But I will, and not because I want you to like me. I’ll do it because I want you to respect me.”

I roll back to my hands and knees and grab th
e crowbar to get back to work.

“Willow, it’s late. I wasn’t being literal when I said you had to be here
every waking moment. It’s almost three a.m.” I gasp in shock at the time. I’ve been working for nine straight hours. I realize that I’ve accomplished a lot and it feels better than anything I’ve ever felt. An orgasm has nothing on accomplishment.

“I’ll go back to the store when I’m finished with what I started.”
I jab the bar under a strip and pry with all my might. I wince when I get stuck with another tack. My hands look like I got into a fight with a hypodermic needle dispensary.

“Willow,” Auggie
tries again. If I hear my name one more time I will either cry or hit him with this crowbar. One option sounds more satisfying than the other.

Auggie
watches me work for a few minutes in silent contemplation. I really don’t want to know what he’s thinking. Right now, I just want to work in peace. He’s too much stress for me to handle. When his mood passes, maybe I can deal with him.

“Things are going well with Devon.” He sounds pleased and worried. I snort at his shitty matchmaking skills. I
don’t have the heart to tell Auggie that his quest to give Devon a girlfriend and me a boyfriend burned in flames. Auggie got his wish. I’m living the life of a teenager- the angst of having a crush on the boy who only wants to be your friend, and being in love with the man who only sees you as a girl.

“I’ll be along in a bit. It feels good to see my progress. It’s not something I’ve experienced before. You’ll see,” I promise
myself, not him.

~
Chapter Sixteen~

“When you gave Seth’s ticket to Devon’s best friend
, I never expected this… I’d expected a man in blue, not a blue-balled asshat rapist-wanna-be,” Essie murmurs in my ear with a snicker, followed by a disgruntled grunt.

Burning Garbage
’s concert is tonight. I’d given my birthday gift to Essie and Seth, so my best friends could join me. Seth abandoned me for a Boy Scout trip with Weston. I’m happy for the kid. He’s acting his age for once. An indie band concert is not the place for impressionable youth. I asked Devon to join Essie and me instead, and shockingly he already had a ticket, but asked if he could give it to his best friend. I thought it was fabulous, because if Devon liked someone enough to call them friend, then I’m sure I’d like them, too… Boy, was I ever wrong.

I join Essie in a long-suffering groan as Devon and Kieren approach the car. 

“Hey,” is mumble to the approaching Masons and receives two very different results. Devon warily smiles at me and Kieren flashes me a shit-eating grin.

Essie high-tails it to the driver’s seat to avoid
whatever was going to come out of Kieren’s naughty, filthy mouth. Not to be curtailed, he slips into the passenger seat next to Essie and immediately starts to barrage her with smarmy flirting.

I wait for the hug that never comes. In fact, Devon hasn’t touched me in over a week, not since our third and last hug at
Revamped
. I keep the curse firmly lodged in my throat and silently walk around the car to sit behind Essie.

I silently brood about my man troubles as we ride to the concert. It’s not like I have to keep up with the conversation. Essie is naturally chatty, as is Kieren. The car is filled with snarky chatter and sharp digs that have Devon snickering under his breath.

I’m officially a stupid-assed teenager with angst pouring out my pores, just as Auggie wanted me. I have a boyfriend who only wants to be my friend and a boss whose emotions run hot and cold. Confused… that’s what I am… confused.

My eighteen year
old self feels at least thirty as I work twenty hours a day. I put in a good twelve hours for
Revamped
. I work the store, run the website and auctions, and then I go to the Spook House and work until my body aches and I can barely keep my eyes open. In the early hours of the morning, I crawl back to Auggie’s loft, shower and sleep like the dead.

My work is two-fold. It feels so good to see a profound change in both
Revamped
and the Spook House. Both are changing before my eyes. I’m changing before my eyes- mentally and physically. My body is stronger from all the hard work at the Spook House, my mind is sharper from working on Revamp’s future, and I feel at peace from accomplishing goals. The second reason I work so hard isn’t because I want Auggie to respect me and pat my head for a job well done, I’m avoiding him. I’d love to say that I don’t resent him for barring me from the
Playroom
, but that would be total bullshit. Plus, my sister’s words echo in my mind, and they eerily sound just like my own voice.

Devon and Auggie have turned me into a confused girly-girl. I constantly worry about how I look, what I say, and even the tone of my voice I use to speak. Hell, the less Devon touches me
, the more I crave his touch. The firmer the friend lines are drawn, the more I want to cross them. The more Auggie coddles me because I ignore him, the angrier I get. When Auggie yells at me for acting like a brat, and for some reason the brat is coming out in full force, the more I want to fuck the hell out of him. Auggie won’t touch me, either. He’s treating me like a kid-sister again. I feel like an adult and have adult reactions. But when Auggie treats me like I’m a toddler, I throw a tantrum. It’s his fault that my mind, body, and emotions won’t line up. I’m a ball of frustrated confusion- I don’t freakin’ know what’s up or down anymore.