Going Long (25 page)

“You see? I’m a blessed man. I have
had wonderful success in life, yes,” he said, turning with his arms out,
acknowledging the giant house we were all sitting in. “But I think we can all
agree…it’s family that makes everything worth anything on this earth. Family.
Jason? Reed? I love you both more than the air I breathe. You two are my life
and soul, and the most important things I’ve ever done. And you have always
loved your old dad, no matter how much of a pain in the ass I might be. Whether
I’m riding your ass about throwing the ball with more speed to get more
distance…or nagging you about meeting with the lawyers to close the deal on our
latest dealership—you just smile, and nod, and do these crazy things I
ask because you love me, and you trust me. And I can’t tell you how much that
means to your old man,” my dad was getting a little choked up, so he took a
small sip of his drink, raising his glass a little and laughing. “Ha, that’s
good stuff. Almost done, I swear.”

“Well, I’m asking you both to
trust me…just one more time. You see, I’ve gone and done something a little
crazy. But it’s really all about family, so I’m hoping you’ll be okay with it
when I tell you,” I looked at Jason as my father spoke, and we both made eye
contact, shrugging, and wondering where the hell our dad was going with all of
this. “Well…I guess that’s enough beating around the bush. Rosie and I are
getting married.”

The room erupted in clapping,
hoots and hollering, as everyone stood at once and collapsed on Rosie and my
father, hugging them and congratulating them on their news. Nolan looked at me,
her eyes wide with shock. “Did you know about this?” she asked.

“Not a clue!” I said, my own
eyes unable to blink, but a smile stretching my face. My father started tapping
on the side of his glass, getting everyone’s attention again.

“Hold on, hold on everyone.
We’re not going anywhere. You can tackle us in a few minutes,” Dad laughed, his
full bellied laugh, the kind he did when he was truly happy. “Reed? Jason? I
hope you two are okay with this. I wanted to talk to you about it first, but it
just never seemed to be the right time…and well…Rosie, she’s always been
family. And over the last few years, what started as a beautiful friendship,
became the deepest love of my life,” my dad said, turning to Rosie and grabbing
her hand with his, squeezing it and bringing it to his lips to kiss it. “When
it’s right. It’s just right.”

My dad had been married four
times in his life, the three women after my mom each only sticking around for
less than a year. But I knew this one was it—the one that would last. It
felt right, just like my dad said. And as Nolan and I talked about it, while
everyone took their turns congratulating my father and Rosie, we realized we’d
been pretty blind to their romance.

By the end of the evening, my
dad finally made his way over to us, and I smiled when Nolan embraced him, and
then Rosie. She loved them as much as I did. “So? What do you think?” my dad
asked, reaching for Rosie’s hand and showing us the ring.

I just smiled at him, and shook
his hand before he pulled me in for a full embrace. “You did good, Dad. Real
good,” I said, noticing Jason standing behind, for once a genuine smile on his
face, too.

“Yeah, you did good, Dad,” Jason
said as my dad turned around to hug him, too.

Nolan

The drama of Christmas Eve had
exhausted me, and I was actually looking forward to the low-key traditional
Christmas we always spent with my grandparents. My parents and I left early
Christmas morning to spend the day with them, arriving just in time for Gran’s
big breakfast. She made the most amazing French toast with bacon and eggs that
always seemed like they came straight from a farm.

I slept a little in the car on
our way. I had stayed up late with Reed, waiting for Christmas to arrive. We
sat outside and watched the stars by the outdoor fireplace. We saw a shooting
star, and both vowed to make wishes with our eyes closed. We kept them secret
to seal them, make sure they’d come true. I knew it was a silly myth, but I was
so happy in this moment, I was willing to grab onto any legend or mysticism
with both hands just to wish it mine for keeps. I squeezed my eyes shut and
whispered in my head for everything to work out for Reed and me, my wish mostly
a direct assault on my enormous fear that as soon as Reed signed his name to a
contract for an NFL team in the next few months that he’ll be lost to me
forever.

My dreams were scattered and
brief, and they continued throughout the car ride to my grandparents. I seemed
to be replaying Reed’s fight with Jason, mostly hearing the harsh words his
brother had said. Awake it was easy to rationalize everything. It wasn’t me. I
could be any girl, and Jason wouldn’t be kind. He would threaten anything good
in Reed’s life because he was jealous. It made me curious about the pictures
I’d seen of the two of them as smaller boys, Reed the little boy under Jason’s
wing. Year’s ago Jason had a look in his eye that he’d fight to the death to
protect his little brother. Somewhere along the way, though, that look had been
replaced by envy.

My parents seemed to have been
spared the verbal assaults of the fight, only witnessing the two Johnson boys
pummeling each other in Buck’s driveway. My mom worried about Reed during our
drive, and I felt relief that she was on Reed’s side without even questioning
it.

As the morning wore on, I was
able to relax more, almost letting go of all of my stress. My brother Mike
joined us before too long, and we were finally able to exchange gifts. Our holiday
was a lot different from the one at the Johnson house, just the six of us
sitting on my grandparents’ living room floor, and sliding mismatched wrapped
boxes to one another filled with sweaters and homemade items. My grandmother
had knitted me a scarf and a hat in ASU colors. Grandpa gave me his old pool
stick, which of course led to a few rounds at the table. I was actually able to
beat him from time-to-time, which I think made him proud.

My parents had given me a few
ASU things, and each time I opened a box I felt a twinge of guilt about my
dismal grades, and the fact that I could be in my last semester at ASU,
flunking out and going down in fiery academic flames. My stress was once again
picking up, when I felt a buzz on my phone and pulled it out to find a text
from Reed.

Hey. So…my mom wants you to come
over for dinner if you’re able. Do you think your parents would mind if I drove
you home later?

I stared at the text for a bit,
and then put the phone back in my pocket so I could dissect the message in my
head. Why would Millie want me to join them? I was embarrassed by my reaction,
always assuming the worst, like it was some sort of trick. I had to remind
myself constantly that Millie was an adult. True, she was cold and lacked
empathy, but she wasn’t calculating ways to attack me. I must have been making
a strange face because my mom became suspicious and finally came to sit next to
me on the sofa.

“What’s wrong, sweetheart?” she
asked, leaning into me a little and whispering her words to keep our
conversation among us girls.

“Nothing’s wrong,” I started,
pulling my phone out again and looking at the screen a bit while I sucked in my
top lip. “It was Reed. He…wants to know if I can join him at his mom’s for
dinner. But…I don’t know.”

I just looked down, shrugging a
bit. I was caught in such a weird place. Part of me wanted to run to Reed just
to be with him more, while I had him. But there was this other part of me that
was terrified of how Millie would probably make me feel, and I didn’t know if I
wanted to feel like that
on Christmas
.

“You know you can go if you want
to, right? You won’t hurt our feelings, sweetie, if that’s what you’re worried
about,” my mom said, reaching around my shoulder and pulling me in for a
squeeze.

“Thanks, Mom,” I said, thinking
more. “I just hate to miss out here, though, you know?”

“Oh, you’re not missing out.
Your dad will doze off in the chair in another hour while your grandmother and
I will clean the kitchen top to bottom and sit on the porch gossiping about her
neighbors and the ladies I work with. Mike is going to speed out of here the
second you leave to get back to his girlfriend, and you already made grandpa’s
day at the pool table.”

I just smiled at her, still
considering, and uneasy about going. “I’m really going to miss him,” I said,
admitting out loud for the first time ever my fears over Reed to my mom. She
just looked at me puzzled, not sure what I was talking about. “Reed’s…well,
he’s probably going to get drafted this year. He could go anywhere, really. And
I’ll be stuck here, in college.” I threw in the college part not wanting to let
on my fear that I’d, in fact, be stuck in the literal
here
, back at
home, going to some junior college without hope of ever becoming anything.

My mom was quiet, her eyes
falling now to show her understanding. She smiled softly and patted my hands.
“Honey, that boy loves you. He loves you like nothing I’ve ever seen. If that’s
what you’re worried about, well, let me just put a stop to that for you right
here and now,” she was giving me her best pep talk. And it might work if I
didn’t think that she was just doing her duty. I appreciated it nonetheless.

“Thanks,” I just smiled back. I
took a deep breath and resolved myself to make the most of the moment. I texted
Reed that I’d love to join them, and then held my breath, waiting for him to
write back. He finally did, saying that he’d pick me up in an hour, which meant
I had an hour left to pretend I didn’t have any worries in the world. I found
my grandpa and challenged him to a few more rounds of nine ball, escaping my
problems for a little while longer.

Reed hugged everyone in my
family when he came to pick me up, even Mike. My family adored him—even
my grandpa, who was truly a tough emotional nut to crack. Seeing how they all
took Reed in made me feel proud of my family. We were simple and we didn’t have
fancy parties or give expensive gifts, but we loved with our whole hearts and
without reservations or prejudice.

Millie’s house was only 30
minutes or so away from my grandparents, so the ride was quick. I told Reed
about the things my family had given me, and even put on my new knitted hat,
which was a bit too tight, but I’d never let my grandmother know. When we
pulled into the driveway, my breath caught, causing Reed to reach over and
squeeze my hand. He knew how little I enjoyed being in Millie’s company.

When he came around to help me
from the Jeep, he stopped me in front of the door, holding both of my hands. “I
think my mom is trying,” he said, looking me in the eyes. It was strange for
him to admit, even in this small way, to the way his mother treated me. And
having him
understand
actually meant more to me than Millie being nice.
I leaned forward and kissed him softly.

“Thank you,” I said, my words
more for him, than his mother. 

He took my hand, and we walked
up the drive through her enormous front door. I followed Reed through the
foyer, to the large sitting room. I noticed Dylan and Jason sitting outside on
the patio through the large wall of windows. I didn’t think Dylan would be
here, given what Jason had said during his fight with Reed yesterday, so I was
surprised to see them holding hands and looking at each other across the table.

I just pointed at them and
nudged Reed. “What’s up with that?” I asked.

“Hmmmmm, well…Jason’s trying,
too,” he said, his face forming a hard smile, and his brow heavy.

As we approached the patio door,
I watched Dylan and Jason stand to talk with Sam and Millie, and the way Millie
grabbed Dylan’s hand and kissed her cheek like she was her own daughter had me
swallowing hard on my own pride. That’s all I wanted. It made me sick to admit
it, but I’d give anything for Reed’s mother to show me just half of the
acceptance and affection she did Dylan.

I found myself suddenly wishing
for super powers—invisibility, flight, time-freezing. Anything that would
get me out of this place right here and now would be fine by me. I was smiling
a little at my thoughts, when Millie’s curt greeting jostled me to attention.
“Nolan, dear. So good to see you,” she said, leaning into me awkwardly to kiss
at the air next to my cheeks. I froze at her movement and bunched my forehead,
stepping back a little, almost embarrassed for her.

“Uh, yeah…thanks for having me over?”
I still wasn’t convinced my presence here was her idea.

“Of course. Nolan, you know
Dylan, right?” she said, introducing us, her smile brighter as she touched
Dylan’s shoulder. It disgusted me.

“Yeah, we’ve met,” I nodded,
more uneasy than I was just seconds ago.

“Oh…” Millie said, looking
around for something else to say. When she couldn’t come up with anything, she
just turned to Sam and started talking. That was it, my warm embrace by this
part of Reed’s family.
Yeah, she was trying
.

Dinner was stilted and awkward.
Sam, thankfully, filled the silence with hunting stories. And despite my
complete and utter disdain for the sport
, if you could even call it that,
I listened intently, hanging on every word. Reed kept hold of my hand under the
table, even while we ate; I giggled the few times he dropped food from his fork
with his left hand. For such a gifted athlete, he was shit with his left hand.
Thank God, his right one healed after the accident.

We all headed to the sitting
room for coffee after dinner, a tradition that seemed so bizarre to me. I
didn’t really like coffee, but I was just happy to not have been insulted over
the last hour, so I sat there and gripped my cup, taking tiny sips of my drink
that I loaded with cream and sugar just to choke it down.

Dylan and Reed were talking
about Reed’s upcoming press conference, and I was trying to put all of my focus
on that when I felt Millie’s polished nails tap at my shoulder, almost like a
chicken’s beak. I looked up at her, a bit bothered and I think she was
surprised by my boldness. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt,” she said,
pulling her hands back together and folding them in front of her. “I was just
wondering, if I might borrow you, just for a moment,” she asked, holding her
hand out to point toward the door.

I looked at Reed, who was still
involved with Dylan, and then looked back to Millie, whose face was growing
full of impatience. Remembering Reed’s words, that his mom was trying, I filled
my lungs and calmed my nerves. I smiled up at her and stood to follow her from
the room, looking back once more to catch Reed’s attention. His eyes were wide,
and I just shook my head for him not to worry, shrugging a little to
acknowledge how strange this was.

We walked to Millie’s office,
and she closed the door behind me—instantly killing my spirits and
diminishing my confidence to nothing. I felt like a grade-schooler who had been
sent to the principal’s office. Out of instinct, I sat in the large leather
chair facing her desk and waited for her to administer my punishment. But
instead of sitting across from me, Millie sat at the corner of her desk,
leaning with one leg propped atop, an amazingly casual pose for her. She pulled
her glasses from her face and folded them, sitting them next to her. She looked
down quietly for a few seconds, almost like she was searching for the words to
her speech.
Oh God, was I going to get a lecture?

“Nolan, my son loves you. And I
don’t think you’re good enough,” she slapped me with this right out of the
gate. No easing in. My emotions betrayed me as my eyes watered at her words,
but I held my breath and willed the tears not to slide any further.

Millie sighed heavily, and I
looked to see her looking down once again, pinching the bridge of her nose.
“That came out cruel. I don’t mean to be that way,” she said, shaking her head.
“It’s just that Reed has always been my baby boy. He was all I had…for so long.
And I had these plans for him. Who he’d marry, where they’d live? But that boy,
he is stubborn. Well…you know this.” She laughed a little, closing her eyes
while she thought of Reed.

“Like I said, my son loves you,”
she said, reaching behind her to grab a large folder from her desk. “Reed came
to see me a few weeks ago. He told me about your academic troubles.”

I gulped. I actually gulped at
her words, looking at my knees in shame and wishing once again for the damn
super power.