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Melinda, I do not appreciate your tone. It may do for the likes of Vince and Brett, but do not forget who I am. As you know, I am not one to bandy my title around, but as Head of Client Services, I am not short of experience. I do not need to be told how to behave in a
pre-production meeting. And please do not refer to me as “Dan” in front of junior personnel.

Daniel

	Simon Horne – 1/6/00, 4:55pm
to:	Harriet Greenbaum
cc:
re:	dirty tricks

It seems I have once again worked my heart out.

For nothing.

As you well know, David was ecstatic about Reeves and Mortimer until you meddled.

What is this hold you have over him?

If I were not such a gentleman I might suspect something tawdry.

For the record, I believe GIVE YOURSELF A LIFT is weak.

It is also hugely derivative. Of what, I am not sure, but I am certain it will come to me.

It will not impress our client. I will permit myself a brief moment of
schadenfreude
when he throws it out of court as he inevitably will.

I know I am down to attend tomorrow’s presentation but I feel it would be dishonest of me to turn up and feign enthusiasm for work I have no belief in.

But then, as you seem to be making such an excellent fist of taking the Executive Creative Director’s job away from me, you hardly need me there.

I will not forget this, Harriet. My memory is elephantine.

Si

	David Crutton – 1/6/00, 4:57pm
to:	Simon Horne
cc:
re:	well done

I’m looking again at your Coke idea and I’ll use a word I save for special occasions.
Genius.
IT’S IN THE CAN is a brilliant concept. It feels as if it’s been done by hip teenagers. I really didn’t think a fart
like you would still have it in you. I love the salesman/beekeeper script. More like that and we’re well on the way.

Shit, look at me. I’m gushing.

	Simon Horne – 1/6/00, 5:03pm
to:	Melinda Sheridan
cc:
re:	LOVE

Melinda, darling, I have been thinking about Brett and Vince, and what lies ahead for them. I have tried to tell myself that they are ready for a shoot this big.

Unfortunately, I remain unconvinced.

The LOVE client is spending 650k on this film and it would be irresponsible of me to entrust the custody of such a huge budget to a callow team.

I feel, therefore, it is incumbent upon me to come to the shoot.

It is an extremely inconvenient time, given,
inter alia
, the mammoth task we have on Coke.

But I have just delivered to David a pitch-winning campaign. I feel I can now step back from that and perform another key aspect of my job. Namely, guiding an eager yet inexperienced team through the rocky shoals of the foreign location shoot.

So Melinda, one plane ticket on my desk tomorrow and I am all yours.

Spare me the embarrassment of thanking me. You can do that as we applaud Brett and Vince upon receipt of their gongs for “Best Commercial.”

Si

	Simon Horne – 1/6/00, 5:06pm
to:	David Crutton
cc:
re:	well done

I am thrilled that you like “IT’S IN THE CAN.” I too think it is
le Poisson d’Or
for which we have been angling.

I intend to work on it through the night and by mid-morrow will have a fully-fledged campaign for your delectation.

And Mako is
l’eau sous le pont.
While I still have misgivings about “Lift,” I am prepared as ever to bow to the consensus.

Si

	Simon Horne – 1/6/00, 5:09pm
to:	Susi Judge-Davis
cc:
re:	last chores of the day

Susi, be an angel – run along to Mel’s office and grab the schedule for the LOVE shoot.

Next, type up the other six Coke scripts that are on my Dictaphone.

Finally, order me a cab for the Groucho ASAP.

Oh, and have them pop a bottle of Dom Perignon in a bucket.

	Harriet Greenbaum – 1/6/00, 5:11 pm
to:	Simon Horne
cc:
re:	dirty tricks

Simon, I am sorry you feel betrayed. That was not my intention and there has been no dirty tricks campaign.

Pinki and Liam are lined up to present tomorrow morning. If you have a change of heart I would love you to attend the meeting to lend your stature and support. Despite what you clearly think, I am not a person to bear grudges. I hope that neither are you.

	Simon Horne – 1/6/00, 5:15pm
to:	Harriet Greenbaum
cc:
re:	dirty tricks

Harriet, as potatoes go, Mako is the babiest of baby new.

I am immersed in Coke.

Kindly get your priorities in order and desist from pestering me with politically loaded e-mails.

	Simon Horne – 1/6/00, 5:19pm
to:	Melinda Sheridan
cc:
re:	LOVE

I have just had Susi pop to your office to grab a call sheet for our shoot. I am looking at it and a couple of things strike me immediately.

I notice we are booked into the Paradise Bay. I have been and, to be candid, I would not send my pool cleaner there.

The
only
place to stay is le Touessrok.

It is a quite superb hotel – a little pricey perhaps, but if we are expected to arise refreshed for the rigours of a dawn call, then nothing less will suffice. I would get on the phone when you are out of your pre-prod and change the booking
tout de suite.