Clouded Innocence (14 page)

Once they were a good distance away from us, Conner and I made our way around the rest of the stable. We did not go back the way we came. We went through the woods, coming out on the side of the stable closest to the house. 

Conner grabbed my hand, pulling me along the path that lead to the porch.
 

He sat down in a rocking chair casually putting his hands behind his head making him look at ease. My breathing was fast and heavy. I did not think it was just from the run. In fact, I knew it also had something to do with Madison almost catching us.

“Francesca, take a seat. Catch your breath before they get back here.”

I did what he asked. He grabbed my hand bringing it to his lips. I sighed then put my arm along the back of his neck pulling him to my lips.
 

The chairs were close enough together that the move was not awkward. He broke apart first. A huge grin spread across his face.

“We were almost just caught doing this exact same thing. Now you are going to kiss me like that sitting out here where anyone could see us?” He laughed. It was amusing. I just seemed to be really pressing my luck today.

“I know. I am sorry. It is just sometimes it is hard to remember that other people are around,” I said.

He chuckled softly. Placing his hand along the side of my face, I turned my face into it, gently rubbing against his palm. “I love you, Francesca.” I let a deep breath out. “I love you too, Conner.” He dropped his hand and only a few moments passed before Steven and Madison appeared.

“There you two are. I was looking all over for you,” Madison said.

“I told her you both were inside the house,” Steven said, wide eyed behind Madison. He was trying to give us a hint.

“Yes, Francesca was showing me a book, she thought I should read,” Conner mentioned, trying to play along.

“Really? Because I checked the library,” Madison stated.

For a moment I could feel the tension growing. She knew the library would be a lie. “Well that is because it was in my father's study.” I turned looking at Conner speaking with my eyes then promptly turned back to Madison. “I told him after my father finished it, he would be more than welcome to it.” I smiled then turned away from her, looking out on to the property.

I do not know what happened after. I eased everything out of my mind and was only aware of the calming presences of Conner next to me.

* * *

I laid in bed that night, across Conner's chest. His hand pressed against my naked back, while I listened to the gentle beat of his heart. I was contemplating what it would be like to be married to Conner; to be Mrs. Edwards. No more hiding. No more lies. Just to be able to be with each other, to love each other openly with no worries of the consequences. The home we would live in. What our children would look like. I hoped they would be identical to Conner. Surely god would bless any child of Conner’s with his handsome good looks. I had no doubt that Conner would make a wonderful husband, but I was just as sure that I would never find out. My father was a man of business and even the merging of two families had to be a business transaction in his mind. 

He knew nothing of Conner or his family. I would have given anything to convince him of Conner's worth. To show him that love was enough. My happiness was in my father's hands, just out of my grasp and he was choosing a path that was leading away from the only person who could ever make me happy.

Chapter
18

Independence Day

As the weeks passed, Nicholas would stop by every few days to call on me. I spent my days trying to keep Madison occupied with something other than chasing Conner and in turn spent my nights completely consumed by him. Before I knew it, the day of the Independence Day Celebration had arrived. Madison and I were contained in my room. We were washed, dried, brushed and dressed. The process was the same as it had been for all the previous balls I had attended, except this time there were two of us for the maids to prepare.

After several long hours, we were finally ready to go down stairs and be presented. Madison went first in her turquoise dress. I heard everyone commend her on how beautiful she was and her giggles to their comments. Next, Mary told me to head down. When the room came into view, my gaze locked immediately with Conner’s. His blue eyes sparkled with amazement as they took me in. I was wearing a pale purple dress that puffed out slightly making me look like a bell. The sheer purple material hung straight over my skirt. It was simple but I loved it. 

I did not even notice Nicholas waiting for me at the foot of the stairs until I almost bumped into him, which forced me to break my gaze from Conner. I looked back to Conner quickly just in time to see my favorite crooked smirk spread across his face.

The coach ride to town was awkward, to say the least. My father, Lilly, Steven, and Judith took the first coach, while Conner, Nicholas, Madison, and I rode in the second one. Madison tried making pleasant conversation. Nicholas politely obliged her. I however, was sitting directly in front of Conner, unable to peel my focus away from him. The way his eyes stared back at me was completely sinful. I bit my lip trying to hide any desire for him. He smiled wickedly at me raising a single eyebrow, and that just made me want him more.

The town had turned very patriotic. The American flags were everywhere. Red, white and blue covered anything that would stand. Nicholas offered me his arm and I reluctantly took it. I did not like touching him if I could avoid it. There was no sign of my father or his carriage. We four, made our way through town admiring the entire splendor.

The town was only made visible by the streetlights overhead. They cast a yellow glow that faded the further away from the center of the light. Insects and moths danced around the light enjoying their own party. 

Couples and small groups passed us, laughing, speaking inaudible words. The town square had been cleared out of all the carts and animal pens that covered the area during the day. It had been turned into an outdoor dance area. The square had been taken over by a band and swarms of couples dancing on the old cobblestones.
 

I looked around but I still did not see my father, Lilly or Steven. Perhaps they were somewhere else enjoying the celebration.
 

“May I have this dance?” I felt chills of delight run across my skin when I heard Conner’s sweet velvety voice whisper in my ear.
 

I nodded releasing Nicholas’s arm to take Conner’s. I knew it was not the proper thing to do, but when Conner had been my escort, Nicholas did not seem to have a problem stealing me away for a dance without Conner’s permission.

Conner pulled me into his arms, once we took our spot in the street, surrounded by other couples eager to dance. The music began and he moved me gracefully across the floor. Dancing with Conner was always effortless. He led me and I would confidently follow unlike when I danced with other gentleman, who I would bump and have my feet stepped on.

“You look stunning tonight Francesca,” he said in a low whisper so only I could hear.
 

I beamed at him. “Thank you Conner. You look most handsome, yourself.”
  

He smiled back. “Is that why you have not been able to keep your eyes off me?” His voice sparkled with amusement.
 

I laughed. “Yes, that is partly the reason.”
 

“Partly? Please tell me, what is the other part?”
 

I grinned at him as seductively as I could. “The other part,” I whispered, “is wondering how overwhelmingly, incredible it would be to feel your hand,” I paused, “slide up my dress,” I watched him swallow hard, “up my legs,” I emphasized with a raised eyebrow, “and press yourself deep into me.”
 I surprised myself with my confidence. In the past, my face would have blushed bright red just thinking those words and I would have never said them out loud. Being with Conner was certainly starting to affect me. Lately, I just could not seem to keep my hands off of him. The more I had him the more I wanted.

He raised his lips into a half grin, “I might just be able to arrange that,” he mumbled just as the song ended. “Thank you for the dance, my love.”
 

“You are most welcome, darling,” I said grinning from ear to ear as he led me from the dance area. I rarely used endearments with him, but for some reason I just could not help myself tonight. Smiling ridiculously, we made our way back to our escorts.

The night went on in a wondrous fashion despite my being tied to Nicholas. I took my turn around the floor with Nicholas. I thought it might look terrible if I did not dance with my escort when I danced with another man. Conner even took a spin with Madison. I did not like it. She kept trying to pull him closer to her, but he secured their proper distance.

“Do you not think they look good together?” Nicholas asked

“Oh yes. Wonderful.” I replied trying my best to hide the sarcasm and not doing a fine job of it. 

“Nicholas, Will you dance with me?” Madison asked after making her way back with Conner. “Conner says he is tired.”
 

Nicholas looked at me as if asking for permission, which had me feeling terrible for not showing the same courtesy before dancing with Conner.
 

“Of course, as long as it is alright with you, cousin?” Madison turned to face me as she asked. She seemed to notice the dilemma playing out on Nicholas’s face.
 

I nodded my head to him.

“Of course Madison, it would be my pleasure,” Nicholas said leading Madison out on the floor. 

I stood there entirely aware of Conner's eyes resting on me. I could feel them pressing on my skin. Trying not to make it seem obvious, I took a step toward him, keeping a small distance between us. My eyes fell to his hand. I touched it, tentatively wrapping my fingers around his, hiding it behind the layers on my bell like skirt. My lips parted and my breathing was heavy.
 

I raised my brown gaze to look into his blue eyes. They drew me in like cool blue water on a hot summer day. I was not even aware of my hand reaching up to caress his face. My fingertips lightly stroked his jaw to his lips. Taking a step forward he closed the distance between us, pressing our bodies tightly together. I closed my eyes, preparing for the sweetness of his lips. Delicately they pressed against mine.

The thunderous roar of the fireworks bursting into the sky broke us apart. I looked around finding Madison and Nicholas on the far end of the square staring up at the sky. All the couples on the floor had stopped in their place to gaze up at the night sky igniting in bright color that flared out and slowly trickled down to earth. It was mesmerizing. I stood there for a moment completely absorbed in the dazzling spectacle.

A rush of prickling warmth broke out on my body, distracting me from the show in the sky. I felt Conner's breath on my skin as he softly whispered in my ear. “Come with me.”
 

My eyes fell on his. They burned with yearning. I did not argue. I knew I would go with him anywhere. My eyes never left Conner, as I followed behind him like a shadow. The town people could have been lit on fire and I would not have even blinked an eye as I was too absorbed in Conner.

Still in the square, two buildings over from where we had been standing, was a stable which contained several of the town folks' horses. Conner pulled me inside shutting the door rapidly behind him. My eyes were still on him while he took in our new surroundings before leading me to a pile of hay in the corner of the stable away from all the horses.

“Now what was it you were wanting?” He said so alluringly with a most seductive grin on his face, “Ah… That is right.” Kneeling down in front of me, he placed his hands on my ankles.
 

“Conner!” I gasped feeling the warmth of his skin against mine. The heat spread across my body like a wild fire stretching my desire with it.
 

“You wanted my hands sliding up this magnificent dress of yours. Is that right?” I nodded impatiently. “Say it Francesca.” He released his grasp on me, making my body shudder with disappointment. I wanted him to touch me more, not to stop touching me.

“I want your hands on me,” I breathed.

“What else?” He asked softly, sliding his hands up my thighs.

“I... ah...” I sputtered. 

“What else Francesca? Tell me?” His thumb rested between my thighs, rubbing in a soft circular motion over the very place where I felt my desire stem from.

My head fell back as my muscles tensed absorbing the pleasure. “Please,” I mumbled.

“Please, what?” he asked.

“I...want you...inside of me?” I moaned, my mind barely working. I could only think how much I wanted him.

“Yes,” he replied. “Good, now lay back.” I did as I was told. Easing myself back on to the hay I stayed focused on Conner. “Now we do not have a lot of time, but I could not let you go the rest of the night without having exactly what you wanted,” he almost purred the words. His hands sent chills up my skin, smoothly gliding up my thighs, easing them apart. My breathing grew faster when he reached between us releasing himself from the confines of his trousers. God I wanted him so much. I could feel myself tingle with excitement. I knew we were walking on thin ice. At any moment someone could walk in and catch us, but I did not have it in me to care.

Conner moved himself to rest between my legs. I could feel his rock hard length pressed against me and I knew how much he wanted me too. His eyes met mine. He gently filled me until I could take no more of him. 

“God I love you, Francesca.” He tenderly moved himself in and out of me then he thrust hard. I gasped, throwing my head back. He repeated the action again slowly, then hard.
Oh my,
it was exquisite. He repeated the process a few more times before picking up his speed. I raised my hips meeting him for each thrust. It only took seconds before I cried out as gratification crashed on to me. Conner followed a moment later. No one would be able to hear us over the explosive rumble of the fireworks so we did not even bother trying to be quiet.

We laid there for just a moment, enjoying the afterglow.
 

“Can you stand?” He asked carefully pulling himself from me. I nodded feeling completely relaxed in my skin. Conner offered his hand to me which I graciously accepted, pulling me from the hay. I readjusted my dress, pulling the layers of fabric back into place.
 

“Turn around Francesca. You have hay all in your hair.” I could not help but laugh, even though I knew it was serious. If someone caught me like this, it would not take them long before realizing why.

“There. Good as new.” He spun me around kissing me quickly on the mouth before heading toward the door. He turned when I did not follow seeing the look of disappointment on my face. “Later,” he promised, giving me a brilliant half smile and I knew it was a promise he would certainly keep. Grabbing my hand we made our way back into the crowd.

We were barely back in our spots as the fireworks ended. We had missed the display but it was entirely worth it.
 

“Francesca,” Madison called as she made her way to me, “Was it not the most glorious thing you have ever seen?” I smiled at her. From what I had seen it had been great.
 

“Yes, Maddy, it was wonderful.” I heard Conner let out a chuckle. I tried to ignore it, I was afraid if I did not then I would blush.
 

“Francesca, hold still. You have something…” I froze in shock as Madison pulled a piece of hay from my hair, “Huh? How did that get in there?” she asked.
 

“Wind!” I said a little too conspicuously, “It must have… blown it… in my hair…” I trailed off using my hand to make the motion of the piece of hay making it into my hair.
 

“Are you alright, Francesca?” She asked, worry spreading across her face.

“Yes, just tired. Ready to get home. To bed.” I could definitely sense Connor’s laughter from behind me. It took everything in me not to glare at him.

“Alright then,” Nicholas said, standing behind Madison. “The fireworks were really the last of the celebration. Let's get you home. It seems you are in need of a bed.”
 

“You have no idea,” I whispered.

Once home, Nicholas bade me good night and Madison made her way to her room at the other end of the house. As soon as her door shut I darted into my room. My father was still not home, but I did not worry. There would be no way that anyone would catch me in the hall that night. Stripping quickly, I threw on my nightgown and headed down the hall to Conner’s room in record time. I opened the door and found him in his bed still completely dressed. I was determined to finish what he had started in the barn, minus the layers of fabric and the hay. And I did. Shutting the door quickly drew Conner’s attention to me. He watched hypnotized as I shrugged out of my nightgown standing there completely on display for him. I walked calmly across the room closing the distance between us.