Clouded Innocence (18 page)

I wiped the tears from my eyes, swallowing my fear I spoke. “My mother would have never allowed you to marry me off to the highest bidder!” I shouted waving the letter in my grasp at him. “You lied to me!” I was shocked by my own assertiveness. 

“How dare you?”
 

“How dare you, father,” my anger matching his.
 

“You snoop around and think that gives you the right to shame this family? You will tell me who did this to you!” He was beyond furious now but then again, so was I.
 

How could he come in here and use the memory of my mother to make me feel guilty. I would not tell him. I would do everything in power to keep Conner safe.
 

Hostility coursing through my body, I screamed louder than I ever had, “NO!!!”
 

A combination of emotions spread across my father's face from my outburst before he settled on anger. I forced myself to look him straight in the eye not backing down.
 

Growing frustrated, he turned to Lilly and yelled, “Will you try to talk some sense in to her?” Then he stormed out the room, slamming the door behind him.
 

Lilly strolled cautiously over, like I was a frightened animal that would run at any moment then took a seat next to me on. “Francesca...” She said with warmth and understanding. Furry still burned in me. I took a deep breath trying to tame it
before I spoke, not wanting to release it on her when it was aimed at my father. “No Lilly. I will not tell you either.” 

She sat back creasing her brow. I watched as her mouth turned up in a small smile. “Do you honestly think I need to hear his name to confirm what I already know?” I looked up into her green eyes and began to panic. “Your father may be blind to the facts, but I am not. I know the child is Conner’s. I told you weeks ago to be careful,” she said shaking her head.
 

I looked down at my hands folded in my lap. “You are not going to tell father, are you?”
 

She sighed, seeming to think on it for a moment. “No. I think it will be better coming from you.”
 

I shook my head. “I cannot tell him Lilly. Father would kill Conner, if he knew.”
 

She ran her hand down my face. “You really do not understand the situation you are in, do you child?” I did not look at her as she spoke. “Your father will not kill Conner. He can’t.” My head shot up and saw the smile on her face. “Do you remember what I told you?” I shook my head not sure what she meant. “If word got out about you and Conner, no man would concede to marrying you. Well sweetheart? Word will most certainly be getting out. An unwed mother is difficult for people not to notice.”
 

“What are you saying?” I looked into her face searching for answers.
 

“No one will marry you, darling. The contract your father made with Mr. Jackson is voided. Your father would only fight and kill Conner if he declined to marry you. I have seen the way that boy looks at you, Francesca. I know he loves you dearly and would never decline.” A tear rolled down my cheek at her words. “I imagine he has wanted to marry you all along. You are going to have everything you ever wanted, Francesca. You and Conner will be married. You will have this child together,” she said placing her hand on my stomach “And you both will be insanely happy.” Tears flowed and sobs broke at her statement. She wrapped her arms around me and held be as I cried. “It is a good thing you did not listen to me, about him.” I giggled at her.
 

After I calmed myself, I pulled back. “Will you go find Conner for me? I need to speak to him.” I pleaded.
 

“Of course,” she said while wiping the tears from my face.

Chapter
21

The Proposal

A few moments after Lilly left, Conner walked in. He stood just inside the door with his eyes focused on the ground.
 He looked so broken.

“I am so sorry Francesca.” Conner spoke barley above a whisper.
 

The sight of him, so guilt stricken made my heart break. After all, I was the one who came to him, night after night. The tears coursed down my face again.
 

“Conner, please...” was all I uttered before the sobs took over.
 

Seeming to forget his guilt he rushed to me, wrapping me in the safety of his arm.
 

“I did not tell him, Conner. He does not know.” I assured him, which was barely audible though the tears.
 

“You think that is why I am upset? Because your father might know?”
 

“I will not say it was you. You can leave here, go back to school and be happy.” I said with my face buried in his neck doing my best to stop from crying.
  

Gripping my shoulders, Conner pulled me back abruptly. His eyes were icy blue, filled with angry. “After everything, you still doubt me?” He sighed running his hand through his hair. “Francesca, I will go down stairs now, and tell your father that the child you carry is mine. That I accept the consequences of my actions, even if it leads to my death, just to prove to you once and for all that I truly, undoubtedly, love you.”
              

A tear rolled down his face as I pressed my lips to his. “I love you too,” I muttered against his lips. We clung to each other; our mouths locked together comforting one another. He pulled back resting his forehead against mine.
 

I whispered, “Lilly says the contract for me to marry Nicholas is no longer valid.” His eyes scanned my face as I continued, “She also says that I am in desperate need of a husband.”
 

His eyes lit up in understanding. I did need a husband and I prayed the only man I had ever wanted more than life itself, wanted me too.
 

“Are you asking me to marry you, Francesca de Bella?” He said quirking an eyebrow at me in a quizzical manner. Oh, how I loved that expression.

“No,” I stated with a straight face and his brow knitted in confusion. “I am asking you,” I began while lightly kissing his cheek, “to come down stairs with me,” I moved to kiss his neck. I felt him sigh with pleasure, “and ask my father,” I felt him stiffen, but I continued kissing him up to his ear, “for his permission.” I said lightly whispering the words in his ear. 

I pulled back, pressed both my hands to his face then pulled him gently to my lips before he could comment. He resisted me at first but slowly his lips began to move against mine. I opened my lips granting him access which he took easing his tongue in. He pressed his weight against me forcing me on my back. Soft lips touched my neck and I shivered with delight. He laughed against my skin. Pulling back, his baby blue eyes pierced mine.
 

“When I first met you, Francesca, I felt this deep connection. I fell in love with you almost instantly. If you had asked me, I would have run away with you. I will marry you today if it means I will get to spend the rest of my life with you.” He stood up, pulling me into his embrace. “Now, let's go tell your father.”

Conner helped me dress. I enjoyed it since he was normally helping me take my clothes off not put them on. Once I was fully clothed we made our way down stairs.

My father screamed and hollered at us. He swore using language I had scarcely heard, but with Conner's hand wrapped around mine, I did not cringe at my father's rants. When he finally paused in his enraged fit, Conner took this as his moment to speak. 

“Sir, I understand your anger, but I love your daughter and I would love nothing more than to marry her and make this right.”
 

My father's eyebrow furrowed together. “Make this right?” He glared, shooting daggers at Conner. “I invited you into my home and this is the thanks I get. You laid with my daughter, ruined any hopes of her marrying, and now you want to make it right? Do you not think that you should have been thinking about
what was
right
before you ever took her to your bed?” My father stood there face red with anger looking like his head would soon pop. I wanted to tell my father that it was not Conner’s fault. That I was the one who went to him and bedded him, but Conner spoke before I could.

“Yes sir. You are absolutely right.” Conner looked down, not daring to meet my father gaze. I could not blame him. At this moment, my father was terrifying. Conner got credit for just sitting in the same room as my father in his outraged state. “What I did was wrong, especially under your roof. I betrayed your hospitality and your trust. And for that I am most sincerely sorry. But if I said I regretted my decisions it would be a lie. I love your daughter more than life itself and I do not regret any of my choices. They brought us together.”

Conner’s face turned to me. Blue eyes sparkled with tears. I smiled softly squeezing his hand trying to comfort him. Gradually, my eyes filled to the brim as well. I let them fall. His words meant so much to me that I felt no need to hide my tears of joy.

My father stood there in silence for a moment just watching us. “Francesca, go wait outside for a moment while Conner and I have a talk, man to man.” I did not like it, but I had little choice. I stood, giving Conner a reassuring smile as I made my way out of the room.

As soon as I shut the door, I heard my father's voice rattle the walls as he screamed and shouted at Conner. Everything was muffled and I could not make out what was being said. It was several minutes later before it all fell silent.

Conner opened the door, his face amused not terrified like I thought he would be. His eyes locking on me, then whispered quietly so only I could hear it, “He wants to talk to you alone. I will be just outside.” I nodded in response.

My father waited until I took a seat in front of his desk.

“Francesca, where did I go wrong?” My gaze met his, confusion spread on my face. His face showed pure sadness. “After your mother died, I know I was too strict on you. Is that why you fell for the first boy to come along? I did not let you out enough, so you had a lack of options.”

I shook my head, “No. My decision to be with Conner had nothing to do with a lack of options. I love him father.”

“You are seventeen Francesca. You are too young to know what love is.”

“Is that why you tried marrying me off to Nicholas, because I do not know what love is?” I regretted the words as soon as they left my mouth. I could see regret pass over my father face. “I do love Conner. I did not know what love was until he came into my life.” I smiled softly, “I love him just like you loved my mother.” I held the letter that I had been clinging too. “Why did you never tell me grandfather did not approve of you? And how could you do the same thing to me? What would have happened if grandfather had never come around? And on top of everything you lied to me about the arrangement.”

“That was different.”

“Why because it was you and mother instead of me and Conner? Or because you already know how things turned out with you and mother? Hindsight instead of foresight.”

He sighed his anger seemed to be lost. He ran his hand over his stubble. Ignoring my questions he spoke. “How long has this been going on?” He said point a finger at my stomach. I rest my hand on the lower part, rubbing the slight firmness there that was my unborn child.
 

“A while,” I said with a shy smile.

He came and knelt in front of me. “I am so sorry, Francesca.” I looked into his brown eyes that matched mine. Sorry was the last thing I ever expected him to say. “I should have been around more. You were right when you told me your mother would have never let me marry you off. I have been so blind lately. It was not until you were both sitting here that I could see that he truly does love you.” Tears streamed down his cheeks causing me to follow suit. 

“He does, father and I love him too, so much.” I threw my arms around his neck. My father held me against him both of us letting go of all the anger and sadness.

“Please forgive me Francesca. I just want you to be happy and I thought I knew what was best,” he shook his head, “just like your mother’s father thought he was doing what was best.” He pulled back. “Tell me you want to marry him. If you do not, I will not force you. We can find another way around your condition. I am done forcing you to do what I think is best.”

“I want to marry him father and not because I am carrying his child but because I love him and want to spend the rest of life with him.” He smiled and nodded seeming completely satisfied with my answer. I wiped away my tears, as he called Conner back into the room. Conner took the seat next to me searching my face for answers. I just smiled because I knew everything was going to be alright.

“I will go into town tomorrow and discuss this with the minister to see when we can have this taken care of,” my father said. “The sooner the better, before people start to talk.” It was as close to a blessing as we were going to get, under the circumstance, but I was grateful none the less.

* * *

Once my father released us, Conner and I walked out of the house hand in hand. I was feeling much better since everything was out in the open. No more lies. No more hiding. We escaped to the woods, to our secret place. 

Once past the tree line that surrounded the grove, Conner's arms engulfed me. He lifted me and swung me through the air.
 

“You are going to be mine,” he said radiating happiness.
 

“Was there ever any doubt?” I giggled at him.
 

He set me down. “Honestly?” he said raising his eyebrow at me.
 

I ran my hand over his forehead and down his cheek.
  “I was always yours, Conner Edwards. I will always be only yours. Forever.” 

He pulled away from me worry on his face. “Promise?” I nodded. “There is something about this whole situation that just does not sit well with me,” he said with no sign of humor on his face.
 

“Oh?” I asked instantly beginning to worry.
 

He smiled at me then dropped down to one knee, making my heart race.
 “I never did ask you, properly.” He took my left hand in his. His blue eyes drew me in. “I love you Francesca de Bella, more than anything else in the world. Would you do me the extraordinary honor of becoming my wife, so I can spend every day showing you how special you are to me?” 

Conner reached into his pocket and pulled out a beautiful sapphire ring. The blue of the stone matched his pale blue eyes perfectly.
 

“Where did you...” I could not finish.
 

“It was my mothers. I could think of no one better suited to wear it,” he said gentle holding it close to my ring finger. He paused. His eyes looked at me waiting for permission.
 

“YES!” I shouted.
 

He beamed a huge, full, smile at me before slipping it on my finger. He stood up, pressing his mouth to mine. I ran my fingers through his hair. I could feel the hunger growing inside. I pressed my body against his and I could feel how much he wanted me too. I tired pulling him in deeper.
 

“Francesca,” he mumbled against my lips. I ignored his resistance, determined to pull him in more. He released me, stepping away, “You make it very difficult to tell you no.”

“Then don't.” I said, stepping closer to him. He held out his arm making me keep my distance. I stuck out my lip, pouting. “Conner… Are you trying to deny me use of your body?” I smiled with a hint of amusement.

He sighed with a smirk, “Please my love. When you say things like that… I do want you,” he stated causing my grin to spread larger across my face, “but, not until your my wife,” he whispered running his thumb down my jaw. Hearing his words just made me want him more.
 “We have done everything so backwards. I just want to try to…I do not know…make it right, I guess.”

He saw it in my face that my desire had not waned, and firmly pressed both hands against my shoulder a little firmer. I could see how much this meant to him.
 

“Alright,” I conceded throwing my hands in the air in defeat. He eyed me suspiciously, thinking it was a ploy to get him to drop his guard. “I love you, Conner. I can wait until you are mine.”