Royal Pain in the Ass (25 page)

“
Juliet, I
’
m losing what little patience I have left.
 
Explain yourself.
”

“
I shouldn
’
t have to.
 
I shouldn
’
t have to explain that Ethan not only insulted me by trying to make a pass, but twice with Angelica by making a pass at anyone, but her sister of all people, and he voiced another insult to the bunch.
 
I told him to shut his mouth and that he couldn
’
t talk about her that way.
 
I lost my temper and slapped him.
 
I hope it still stings.
 
I won
’t apologize.
  Don
’
t ask that of me.
 
Assume everything he told you, except for the slap was reversed.
 
There.
 
Are you happy now?
”
I stormed off.

Millie was waiting for me outside the parlor.
  “
I will not let my daughter go through what I did.
 
You will stay away from Ethan.
”
She growled at me.

“
I don’
t want to be anywhere near him.
 
Angelica shouldn
’
t either.
 
I don’
t know what you think is going on, but know this, I have no interest whatsoever in Ethan, unless it involves a baseball bat to his face.
 
I don’
t think I
’
m using uncertain terms.
”

“
You are confined to your room until I deem otherwise.
”

“
Really?
  You
’
re going to try to ground me?
”

“
You are being escorted there now.
 
Xavier, see to it she doesn
’
t leave her room.
”

Xavier led me down the hall and I was glaring at him then entire way.
  “
Really?
  You
’
re on her side?
”

“
It was either I take you to your room or she has armed guards watch you.
”
Xavier warned.
  “
I know you know how to sneak out of your room.
 
She doesn
’
t. 
I am on your side.
”

I nodded.
  “
This sucks.
” 
I threw myself onto my bed.

“
Come now, it
’
s not that bad,
”

“
Millie is stupid,
”
I muttered into a pillow.
 
I heard Xavier laughing.
  “
And she
’
s setting her daughter up with a whore, well a man whore, somehow I guess it
’
s less bad, but not really . . . all I know is I can
’
t do anything to help . . . . this is stupid . . .
”

I felt the bed sink under Xavier
’
s weight.
 
He started rubbing my back.
  “It
’
ll be alright, just relax.
”

“
What am I supposed to do?
”

“
For the moment, nothing.
”

“You
’
re a crappy advisor.
”

“
Oh, is that so?
”

“
Yeah, you can
’
t give me the advice I want to hear.
 
So, you suck at life.
”

“Oh, I
’
m glad you think so highly of me,
”
Xavier laughed.

“Meh, I don
’
t think you
’
re a dunderhead anymore.
”

“Oh, I
’
m so flattered.
”

“
I could be like Fiore and just classify you as a wanker.
”

“
She said what about me?
”

“
Fiore, she classifies people in one of three categories, wankers, losers, and friends.
”

“And I
’
m a wanker?”

“
I don’
t know she didn
’
t classify you.
”
I shrugged.
 
I looked up and propped my head up on my hand.
“So, I
’
m stuck in here?
”

“Yes,”

“
Did James agree?
”

Xavier nodded sadly.
  “
Yes, Millie made a compelling argument.
”

“
Which was?
”

“
She said you were your mother
’
s daughter.
”

“
Which means?
”

“
I haven
’
t the foggiest.
”

“
Can you find out?
”

“
I can try.
”

I narrowed my eyes at him.
  “
Do or do not, there is no try.
”

“Yoda? 
Really?
”

I shrugged and flopped back down, on my back this time.
  “I
’
m already bored.
”

Xavier laughed.
  “
What would you like to do?
”

“
Go outside.
”

“
You always want what you can
’
t have, don
’
t you?
”

“
Yeah, usually.
 
Mom always taught me to shoot for the moon, even if you miss, you
’
ll land on the stars.
 
The way I see it, if I can imagine it, why can
’
t I get it then?
”

“
Where is your mother, anyway?
”

“
Somewhere in the Atlantic,
”

“
Ah, a cruise?
”

“
No, idiot, I sprinkled her ashes in the ocean.
”
I snapped.

“
Oh, I didn
’
t know,
”
Xavier mumbled.

Why was I snapping at him?
 
He hadn
’
t known.
  It
’
s not like I went around telling people about it.
  “Don
’
t worry about it,
”
I grumbled as I turned away from him.
 
It still was a raw wound.
 
It hadn
’
t even been six months and I still missed her terribly.
 
It wasn
’
t just not having her here physically.
 
It was not telling her how my day was.
 
Not being able to ask her how hers was.
 
Not being able to tell her who I was talking to, who I missed.
 
Her telling me I worry too much.
 
Her telling me somehow everything worked out eventually.
 
What I really missed the most was her singing . . .

“You
’
ve lost so much,
” Xavier muttered.

Xavier brought me out of my thoughts.
“
Shit happens.
” 
I pulled my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around them and curled myself into a ball.
 

“
Juliet,
”
Xavier rubbed my back and I flinched at the touch.

“
Can you just go?
”

Xavier sighed but I felt the bed shift as he stood up.
  “I
’
m just down the hall if you need anything,
”

I listened for the door and sighed when it clicked shut.
 
I felt the tears and I didn
’
t fight this time.
 
I missed her like crazy.
 
I rummage through my stuff for my phone and went through the pictures.
  “
Mom . . . I miss you . . .
”
I let the tears flow and was bawling before long.
 
I felt so alone.
 
No one else had ever really accepted me for who I am.
 
Mom has taught me to embrace who I am and never be sorry for it.
 
There was no reason to be.
 
It was hard sometimes, but we are who we are for a reason.
 
What I wouldn
’
t give to hear her voice again.
 
I curled up in the bed again and pulled the covers around me.
 
I was cold, but it wasn
’
t the kind of cold blankets could cure.
 
I must have fallen asleep because I was woken up to a soft knocking.
 

I looked up as Xavier came in carrying a tray of food.
 
My head was pounding and my eyes hurt, I wiped at them and the skin was raw.
  “
I thought you might be hungry.
”
He offered with a small smile.

“
Not really,
”
I shook my head.
 

“
At least have some tea or something,
”
Xavier pressed as he fiddled with the small tea set.

“
You English and your tea.
 
What about coffee?
”

Xavier pursed his lips and watched me.

“
That was a joke,
”
I rolled my eyes.

At that he let out a relieved laugh.
  “
Ah, well, would you like to try to eat something.
”

I shrugged and looked at the trey.
 
Tomato soup, a sandwich, water, tea, and a sugar cookie.
“I
’
m really not hungry though,
”

“
At least eat the cookie.
 
Those always seem to cheer you up.
 
Gwen made sure I grabbed one before I left the kitchens.
”

I smiled at that.
  “
Gwen always has cookies.
”

Xavier nodded.
“
That she does.
 
She said she
’
d come up after her shift.
 
I sincerely hope you two aren
’
t planning on sneaking out.
”

“
I don’
t plan on it,”
I shook my head.
 
But there
’
s no telling with Gwen, I thought to myself.

“
Are you feeling any better.
”

“
Sort of,
”
I was still sad, and I was sure I looked a mess.
  I hadn
’
t even looked at myself in the mirror today.
 
I pulled myself out of bed and went over to one of the chairs and stretched.
  “
Let me get a shower and I
’
ll eat something.
”
I offered as I disappeared into my bathroom.
 

I looked at myself in the mirror and gasped.
 
I looked a mess, clowns have cleaner makeup.
 
As if the mascara and eyeliner from last night wasn
’
t bad enough, my crying had made it streak across my face.
 
My hair was a tangled nest of disaster.
 
How had Xavier not told me I looked so awful.