Unraveling of Avery Snow, The (14 page)

Chapter
Twenty-Three

Sara
fe

Ragged was the best word to describe myself while I lay on the floor. Dallas was long gone. I had laid here for hours. Not moving, not crying, just lying. May licked my face and I held her in my arms. I was a weak shell of a person right now.

“Oh get up you pathetic fool,” a voice thick as honey said. I looked around and lifted my head. No one was there. I thought for a moment that maybe it was me. Maybe I was
telling myself to get up. So I did just that. I raised myself up off the floor. When I stood I was face-to-face with a Dark Guide. Her black wings nearly filled my room. Her dark skin was lustrous. Her blue eyes seemed to pierce me with a wicked stare. Sarafe.

“What are you doing here?” I mumbled to her. “Come to finish me off?”
I didn’t care. At this point I was ready for her to kill me. “Go ahead!” I yelled.

Her laugh filled the room. She looked down upon me as she floated above me.
“Wow, you’re that desperate that you’re ready to die? I love it!”

“What do you mean?” I asked her.

“I came here to witness Dallas breaking your heart in two. It was really fascinating, honestly,” she croaked. “I applaud him at his job. He really was wicked.” My head spun. She saw him break up with me?

“What are you talking about?” I was so confused.

“Well, let’s put it this way. I have been posing as his chef for so long, whispering in his ear that you don’t care about him. I got tired of waiting for him to throw you to the curb, so I decided a change was in order,” she said. “I posed as his Spirit Guide instead and I let loose all of your dirty secrets!” She did it. She was the one who told him. She was Sarah. I should have known. Justin’s mom did tell me that she was hiding right under my nose. My hands shook in anger and fear. She accomplished what she intended in the first place. She didn’t kill him, but she hurt him and me. She lied, snuck her way into his life, and told him the truth about his past. Put things in his head and separated us. “Now you know what it feels like to be without the man you love.”

“What now?
You’re going to kill me?” I asked through clenched teeth.

“Nope.
Your pain is enough for now.” She looked to my door and a look of fear flooded her eyes. One last glance my way and she flew out of my balcony window, smashing it into pieces. My front door burst open, John standing firmly with Ianni at his side. I collapsed onto the floor as she came rushing towards me. The light of the Angel in John’s hand had submerged my apartment. The last thing I saw was him flying after Sarafe. Then I hit the ground.




“Avery,”
Ianni said soothingly. “You’re okay.” My eyes fluttered and I could make her out now. She stood before me as I lay in my bed. She smiled and I returned it weakly. All of the memories flooded my mind. Dallas left me. He was gone. I had hid the truth from him and he left me.

“Did John find her?” Sh
e shook her head. Of course not; that would have been too good of an ending. She was still out there somewhere, watching me, maybe right now.

“Everything will be fine
. John will be watching for her.” She paused. “I had Beau go get our things from Dallas’ place. He wasn’t even there. So that was easy.”

“Oh,” I responded.
He was gone and didn’t even try to stop me from leaving. He had really given up on me. There would be no fighting to get me back it seemed. Even though all of the things he was told was by a Dark Guide, one who was intent on hurting me.

“You will be fine
, Avery. I know you will. Get some rest,” she said as she covered me up and I fell back asleep.

No dreams came to me. I was dreamless and desperate. When I woke the next morning I felt an ache inside of me, but not as bad as the day before. I suppose that it would be like this. Every day would get easi
er until I was over him. I didn’t want to be over him. I wanted to be with him. He didn’t call me; he didn’t want to talk to me. Even though I watched my phone it didn’t ring. I knew what I needed to do, but I didn’t know if I had the strength or nerve to do it. I picked up my phone and called.

“Hey
, Avery,” Astrid answered. “How are you?”

“Not so good
. I need to ask you something,” I said.

“Anything.
What’s up?”

“I need to know if you can tell me a good place to stay for a while up there in Washington.”

Chapter Twenty-Four

Leaving

I remember Landon telling me that the best place to
think was Washington’s Olympic National Park. I definitely needed to think; that was apparent. I also needed to heal and lick my wounds. Astrid was willing to help me get my stuff sorted and she agreed to help me find a place near her in Sequim. She told me of a small place for rent that I would be able to afford. I even called around for temporary jobs. Just for a few months. I found one that suited me well. It was a hospital and I would be doing the same as I did here; helping the elderly. I had everything in order. My affairs were straightened out, I just had to tell my friends.

Ianni
met me for lunch after I got off from work. Kerri had yet to come back from her honeymoon, so I took over her duties. She looked radiant and happy when she sat down. I hated to have to tell her the news, but she deserved to know. It wasn’t like I was running away, I just needed a break.

“I need to talk to you about a few thin
gs,” I started. She sipped her iced tea and looked over her menu. “I need some time to heal, so I called Astrid and I am going to stay up in Washington for a few months.” Immediately she dropped her menu and spilled her tea. Her eyes were wide in shock.

“No! You can’t leave me here,” she said in desperation.
“I need you.”

“No you don’t. I think you are doing fantastic and you can stay in my place for as long as you need to. I am
keeping it for now. My dad is helping me with the rent,” I informed her. “I need to do this for me. I think you can understand that after what I went through. I really should have left last year. Instead, I stayed here, thinking that everything would go back to normal.”

She looked at me and only stared. She didn’t think I would do this. But I had to. There was no getting around it.

“Ianni, I know now why I reincarnated so much. I know that it had nothing to do with Landon. It was about me.”

“Who told you?” she asked
as her eyes fell to the floor.

“No one you know,” I answered
. “I need to find myself and focus my energy on me. Dallas and I are not getting back together.”

“You don’t know that. I see him
; he is just as miserable as you.” I believed what she said to be true, but he would get over me in no time. I wasn’t going to fight for him if he didn’t want me to. He had ended it and he wasn’t willing to work it out.

“
If you just tell him who Sarah really was maybe he will understand,” she begged.

“No, I can’t do that. He made the choice to end it. Even if she didn’t tell him, he would have anyway. It was only a matter of time.” I believed that in my very soul. I knew he loved me
, but his goals and mine were conflicting. He wanted to move on and Sarafe was the little push he needed. The excuse to end things. It all started with Valentine’s Day, when he forgot about me, then escalated into more and more failed attempts to fix our relationship.

“People break up all the time
, Ianni. It’s part of life. But I refuse to let this ruin my chances at living the life I really want,” I told her.

“So you’re running away and going to live in anoth
er state? That makes no sense.”

“Oh but it does. You chose to leave your home
, didn’t you? And look how that turned out!” She had no response because I spoke the truth. I saw her follow her own path and she was embracing it gracefully. Now I would do the same. The only difference was I would be coming home. We ordered lunch and she begged me to change my mind. I finally just didn’t give her a chance to say anymore. “It’s decided,” I told her firmly. And she was done. I hated hurting her, but I knew she would be fine without me for a few months. She had Kerri and Beau. She wasn’t alone at all. If she had been I would take her with me, but she was living her own life, and for that I was grateful. We ended lunch with happy moods. She felt hopeful for me now. And I needed it.




Kerri arrived home from her honeymoon and she called me right after she landed. She told me how awesome the trip had been and asked me how work was. I filled her in on all of the new residents we had gained. I wasn’t planning o
n telling her about Dallas and I until later. We had plans to get together for dinner at their house the following night, so I had to tell her I would be coming alone.

“What do you mean
alone?” she asked in shock.

“Alone as in only me.
Dallas and I broke up, Kerri.” I had tried to say it as easy as I could. “He ended it the night after the wedding.” She was silent on the other end of the line. “Kerri, you still there?”

“
Yes. I’m just in shock. What happened?” I told her everything, laying it all on the table. Even though I didn’t want to tell her yet, it just sort of came out. The story flowed from me from beginning to end. Revealing all of our secrets and telling her about the dark evil that followed me around and hid in the shadows. I told her how Sarafe had tricked him, but he chose to end it anyways. She had no words except, “I am so sorry.”

I needed to tell her that I was leaving
, but it seemed harder to tell Kerri than it had been to tell Ianni.

“I will be there tomorrow though,
and we can talk then.” She agreed and I hung up with her. It was exhausting opening up to people. My dad had taken it the best so far. He knew that I needed to clear my head so he offered to help me out. Aunt Paulina cried and begged me to stay, but I eventually told her it wasn’t going to happen. I looked forward to a fresh start.  A new beginning was what was best for me to heal.

The next night I went to meet the newlyweds and have dinner. I hated that I had to talk to her about going away tonight. It seeme
d to put a damper on my mood, as if it wasn’t dampened enough. As the days went on my pain only increased. Being without Dallas left a hole inside me that was only growing bigger. It wasn’t like everyone tells you
time heals all wounds
. Bull! Time makes wounds worse. I only thought of him more and more. I was reminded of stupid things we did that didn’t seem to matter when they happened. Like when we would snuggle in bed and eat ice cream. Or once when he and I played video games, I beat him. Or little secrets we held between the two of us that we never told anyone. Stupid secrets that didn’t seem to matter at the time, but did now. They were things I would not forget.

Doing anything minimal was hard. Just brushing my teeth and getting dressed took all of my energy
, so getting ready to see Justin and Kerri was probably the hardest thing I had ever done. I had skipped the make-up, deeming it totally unnecessary.

As difficult as it was
, I arrived at their house on time with a bottle of wine in hand. Kerri opened the door and hugged me right away. I didn’t realize the amount of emotions this simple hug would bring out until the bottle of wine had fallen to the floor and I fell into her arms. My eyes bled with tears and she held me until the flow stopped.

Finally
, once I dried my tears, we could relax and talk. I was a mess and I didn’t like it. I felt vulnerable, which was something I had tried not to be. I had kept my wall up around my heart so that things like this didn’t happen. Dallas swore he wouldn’t hurt me and he did. He was the reason my wall was now firmly back in place.

“You can’t
totally blame him, Avery,” Justin told me while we ate roast and potatoes. “He didn’t have all the correct information given to him.” I almost choked on my meat when he said it. He had been so quiet all night and then he came up with that. I shook my head. Boys stuck with their boys. That was apparent.

“Justin, he broke her heart!” Kerri squealed.
“You better not take his side.”

“No sides should be taken. I should have told Dallas about his past. I just
…” I paused. I did know why I didn’t tell him, but it was out of selfishness. I didn’t want him to get upset knowing what I did to him then. I didn’t think he could handle it. None of this was his fault, but nonetheless, my heart was ripped in two. I went on after composing myself. “I just didn’t know how to tell him. But no one should be mad at him.” I couldn’t handle everyone being angry at him. I hated when people broke up and everyone hated each other. There should be some peace between the couple and their friends. I wondered what Landon and I would say to each other. I hadn’t even thought about him since the break-up. I thought about him for the rest of the evening though.

Kerri and I drank wine on the
back patio and Justin watched baseball. That was when I told her. At first she spit out her wine all over herself. I couldn’t help but laugh and so did she. Then she cried. I hugged her and told her it would all be okay and I would be back soon. When I left it was me who gave her the hug that helped her on her feet.

“You have a job when you get back,” she said as she walked me to the car. “So don’t like, fall in love with the place and move there permanently.” I laughed at her witty humor. It wasn’t possible that I would give up my home and stay there. What was possible was growth
; mine.