Uncle John's Ahh-Inspiring Bathroom Reader (2 page)

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Shark Attack!

Pet Me

Good Dog

Bad Dog

Medium

Amazing Animals: The Opossum

Did You Know That Bees…

What's All the Buzz About?

Humans of the Sea

A BLUNDERFUL LIFE

Short

Oops!

Desperately Seeking Approval

Medium

Oops!

Uncle John's “Creative Teaching” Awards

Opening Lines

Dumb Crooks

Oops!

Dumb Crooks

More Opening Lines

MOUTHING OFF

Short

Great Scott!

Cliff's Notes

Don't!

Writing On the Wall

Shakes's Takes

Homer VS. Homer

Just Joshing

Smarty Pants

The Miracle Worker

Salman Rushdie

Freedom's Voice

Sage of the Sixties

In My Expert Opinion

Napoleon's Code

Disraeli, Really

Smart Alecks

FORGOTTEN HISTORY

Short

Old History, New Theory

Old History, New Theory

So You Want to Win a Nobel Prize

A Light in the Night

Name That City

Medium

Old History, New Theory

Queen of the Jail

The King of Cotton

Greetings From Earth

The Cotton War

Long

The Rest of the U.S.

The “American System”

An Explosive Idea

For Posterity's Sake

*The Rest of the Rest of the U.S.

CANADIANA

Short

A Note From Gander

Medium

Weird Canada

Parliamentary Manners

No Can(ada) Do

Gander

BUSINESS

Medium

Promotions That Backfired

Special Tips For Hiring Women

Caught In the Act

What's On eBay

Funny Business

Memorable Moments in Marketing

Long

As Seen On TV

FOOD FOR THOUGHT

Short

Canned Delicacy

Medium

Flunking the Pepsi Challenge

Banana Peels

Long

An A-Peel-ing History

THE REEL STUFF

Short

Hard Boiled

Medium

“I Spy”…At the Movies

Great Story…Just Change the Ending

Video Treasures

Box Office Bloopers

Long

The Cost of War (Movies)

*Rediscovered Treasure: Buster Keaton

TOYS/AMUSEMENTS

Short

It's Slinky, It's Slinky

The Saga of Silly Putty

The Magic Screen

Medium

The World's First Video Game

Video Game Hall of Fame

Long

Let's play Spacewar!

Let's Play Pong!

The Rise and Fall of Atari

Mr. Gameboy

Let's Play Nintendo!

MUSIC

Short

Elvis By the Numbers

Medium

International Elvis

Behind the Hits

Long

Has Anyone Seen My Stradivarious?

Secrets of the Stradivarius

Elvis By the Numbers

LAW & ORDER

Short

Court Transquips

Underworld Lingo

The Godmother

Phone Phunnies

Looney Laws

Phoning It In

Medium

Strange Lawsuits

Lemme Explain…

Did the Punishment Fit the Crime?

Benched!

Strange Lawsuits

Benched!

LIFE IS STRANGE

Short

It's a Weird, Weird World

Amazing Coincidences

The Incredible Shrinking Heads

A Room With a Fish

It's a Weird, Weird World

Amazing Coincidences

Medium

Amazing Luck

Nature's Revenge

It's a Weird, Weird World

CONSPIRACY!

Short

A Famous Phony

A Famous Phony

Medium

Smells Like…Murder

Long

Death of a Princess

ORIGINS

Short

You're My Inspiration

Around the House

One Good Turn Deserves Another

Medium

Mothers of Invention

Fads

Lost Inventions

Patently Absurd

The World's First Disposable Diaper

Long

I Want to Ride My Bicycle I

I Want to Ride My Bicycle II

I Want to Ride My Bicycle III

Microcars

MYTHS & LEGENDS

Short

The Ant and the Pigeon

Myth-Conceptions

Medium

The Tiger, the Brahman and the Jackal

How The People Got Beer

The Legend of Lincoln's Ghost

Cruel Crane Outwitted

Long

Stranded!

PHRASES & WORD ORIGINS

Short

Familiar Phrases

Twist Me Dizzy

Familiar Phrases

Medium

Familiar Phrases

Word Origins

Word Origins

Word Origins

POP SCIENCE

Short

Human Hailstones

Ask the Experts

Medium

Ask the Experts

Invasion of the Frankenfish

Love at First Sight?

Rainforest Crunch

Ask the Experts

Mother Nature Is Out to Get You

POP-POURRI

Short

Is This Brain Loaded?

Uncle John's Page of Lists

You Ain't Got It, Kid

Know Your Ologies

The World's Worst…

Tee-Shirt Wisdom

It's Greek to Me

The Granny Quiz

Medium

Lucky Finds

New Vietnam

Underwear in the News

Houdini's Secrets

Long

*A Restless Night

PUBLIC LIVES

Short

Celebrity Favorites

Sorry Charlie

Medium

Famous for 15 Minutes

Celeb Lawsuits

Harry's Headlines

Famous for 15 Minutes

THAT'S DEATH!

Short

Epitaphs

My Body Lies Over the Ocean

They Went That-A-Way

Medium

The Final Days of King Charles II

My Body Lies Over the Ocean

My End is Near

Long

TheyWent That-A-Way

Death…It's A Living

Where There's a Will…

POLITICS

Short

Weird Sentences

Politalks

Trust Me…

Trust Me…

Medium

Democracy In Action

Over My Dead Chicken

D.C. Follies

D.C. Follies

WORDPLAY

Short

“Here Speeching American”

Brainteasers

What Am I?

If They Married

Holy Punctuation

Headlines

Free Pork with House

Warning Labels

No City Dust Here

Wonton? Not Now

Tom Swifties

For Sale, Buy Owner

Redundancies

Fictionary

Yah-hah! Evil Spider Woman

BE A SPORT

Short

Golf Flubs

Cartwheel Kicks

Medium

He Slud Into Third

It's a Racket

Wrestling Lingo

The Man in the Mask

Long

Lord Stanley's Cup

The Strange Trail of the Stanley Cup

The Legend of Gorgeous George

TV OR NOT TV

Short

The Professor's “Inventions”

Medium

“Holy Catchphrase, Batman!”

“Book 'Em Danno”

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