UNBREAKABLE (ABLE SERIES) (16 page)

“Hey, Trish, eyes on me,” He tells me, shaking me a little bit.

I open my eyes and more tears flow as he wipes them off my face. He squeezes my cheeks a little, and with his eyes gazing into mine, he gives me a silent order to listen to what he’s about to tell me.

“I love you, Trish, so much; more than you’ll ever know. I’ll stay strong for you, so promise me, you’ll do the same for me. Whatever it is, we can handle it together. If you need to cry, cry with me…if you need to scream, scream with me…if you need to pray, pray with me… if you’re scared, let’s be scared together…if you’re frustrated, let’s be frustrated together, but never at each other. Can you do that for me, babe?”

I shake my head. “I’m scared, Jake. He said it could be c- cancer…Please, pl-please tell me everything will be okay; that you’ll be okay. You f..f..feel much better now, right?” I ask between sobs.

“Listen to me. Don’t be scared; I’ll be right next to you. I can’t tell you everything will be okay, sweetheart, we just have to take it as it comes. He said it
could be
, he never said he was sure…we don’t even know what’s wrong with me, and you’re already thinking I’m going to die. And yes, I feel much better than earlier this morning. Come on, give me my smile.”

Instead of smiling, my tears keep on flowing. He holds me tight, while rocking us and giving me small pecks on my forehead. Out of the three options the doctor mentioned, I don’t know why the word cancer keeps on invading my mind, maybe because I’ve unexpectedly lost two men I loved so dearly. One dies of a heart attack, and the other gets blown up.

Chapter 17

Jake

I decide to pass by the house, first instead of going straight to the hospital. I need to give Cody, Brian, and Roxy a heads up on what’s going on, because I need them to insulate her well against the unknown. My mind is going a mile a minute trying to figure out how to prepare Trish. God, I just got her. Why would God throw me a fucking curve ball like this? How could I possibly protect her from myself?

Trish next to me crying her fucking eyes out is slowly killing me. I’m supposed to propose to her. When should I do it now? Should I wait until I’m better? What if I die before then? I don’t want to think the worst, but I just have this gut feeling this will be the toughest fight of my life. I don’t know how to explain it, I just feel that way. The fear of losing the chance to spend a lifetime with her is slowly wrapping its venomous tentacles around my heart. I quickly toss that thinking aside because fear doesn’t have a place in this, but at the same time, how could I not be fearful.

I look at my sister not wanting to burden her with calling my parents, but I can only handle Trish breaking down. “I need you to call Mom and Dad, tell them my doctor advises I go to the hospital. I’m sure dad’s going to ask what’s going on, tell him it could be a staph infection, pneumonia, or cancer.” The moment the word cancer leaves my mouth Tami gasps, so I squeeze her shoulder. “T, nothing is set in stone. Those are just his assumptions so switch your brain back to neutral. If you can also call Brian, let him know what’s up. Please, I need you to be strong for my girl; she’ll need you. Can you promise me that?” She nods and quickly makes the call.

I’ve decided to push on and propose to her today, not because of some knee jerk reaction, but because I want her…I want US to have something to look forward to…to fight for…our love for each other, our life together, the forever we want, is the prize we need to set our sights on, amidst this huge fucking shit hole.

My cell phone plays the Marine Corps hymn, and I know it’s my dad calling. “Hey, Dad.” Trying to sound as nonchalantly as I can.

“Jake, we’re on our way. Hang tight, Son. Your mom wants to talk to Trish to calm her down. We know her well enough to know she isn’t handling this well,” He says in a very calm, yet commanding tone.

While Trish is talking to my mom, I’m thinking of what I’m going to say to her when I propose. Then my mind switches to how I am going to protect her from this. No matter what comes to my mind it’s always about Trish…it will always be about her. I’m not surprised to find our three best friends already sitting in the living room waiting, looking somber, their eyes filled with worry.

Roxy rushes toward us. “Everything will be okay. Don’t worry, Trish. We’ll get through this,” She whispers as she hugs her as tight as she can.

Without a word coming out of my mouth, Brian and Cody understand their part in this. Brian hugs Trish and whispers something in her ear. Overwhelmed by the affection and concern they have for us, Trish’s tears start running down her face until she’s shaking. Witnessing her break down is what will drive me to the edge of insanity, because I have no way of stopping it. Fear is all she feels right now. She needs to know I’m right here next to her, that I’ll protect her. I’d lay it all out there for her. I need to ease her mind, so I carry her to our room. I try to lay her down, but she pulls me on top of her.

“Trish, I’m way too heavy for you. Let go for a minute.”

“No, I don’t want to. I want you close to me. Hug me, please.” She clings tightly to my neck, hanging on for dear life.

All I know, at this moment, is I want her close to me; I want her to feel me, to know I’m still here…that my heart’s still beating…that I’m still alive. The urgency of my need for her to believe I’ll protect her against all hurt is beyond words. I want her to forget our reality, even for just a few minutes. The reality is I want to escape our reality, because once we set foot in the hospital, our lives will change.

“Trish, you’re scaring me. Please, stop crying. Listen to me; I know you’re scared; I am, too. Remember what I said, we’ll stay strong together. Now, tell me what you need,” I ask, trying to keep it together for her.

“I need you. I need to feel you,” She says desperately.

I don’t think this will be our last chance of being together, but I want to savor everything before I go to the hospital. I hold her face tenderly and kiss her as if I will never see her, ever again. My tears mix with hers make it more emotionally consuming than I can ever put into words. We start taking our clothes off, and as soon as our skin touches, the fire that is burning deep in my soul ignites hers and an emotional fire storm flows from her body to mine. There is no exchange of words; we are running purely on our sense of touch and sight. It’s even better than saying anything at all. The silence combined with the intensity of our emotions serve as a silent communication between us. Every touch, every stroke, every caress, every kiss, every moan, and every thrust conveys a message of love, pure unadulterated love and devotion for each other that will never be severed nor extinguished because it’s
unbreakable
.

“Let go, Jake. I need you to let go. I want us to come together.”

I continue to thrust into her…wanting…needing to make our moment last as long as I can. Not wanting to face the unknown, but yearning for solitude of forever with her.

“We’ll be together, forever. Come with me, my love.”

As soon as those words leave her lips, we both come together in a glorious united perfection. We ride the tremors together, holding each other, her cheek against mine, my hands cradling her head as she wraps her arms around me like a vise.

“Are you satisfied now, horny girl?” I try my hardest to make light out of our situation.

“Satisfied, as always! How about we take a shower, and head to the hospital where sexy nurses await you?” She suggests with a smile, but it doesn’t quite reach her eyes.

“There’s only one sexy nurse I want, and she is right here.”

I pause and look at her; her eyes convey her never ending love for me as I know she can see in mine. Peace and calmness that shouldn’t be in my heart and mind are there…I feel it flowing through me, and it’s my hope that I can give even just a little of it to her. Knowing what I have to do next, I give her my smile that I know she calls my panty-dropping-knee-buckling-heart-stopping smile.

“Please, close your eyes,” I say as I let my lips brush against hers.

“Okay.” Now it’s her turn to give me my favorite smile that melts my heart and stills me.

After making sure her eyes are tightly shut, I make my way to her dresser where I have her ring hidden. As soon as I get the ring secure in my hand, I completely cover her body with mine while I cradle her head, allowing my eyes to savor her beautiful face, her eyes still closed, her lips slightly parted.

“Open your eyes, baby.” As soon as her eyes land on mine, I know this is the right moment. For whatever reason, beyond my understanding, her eyes that a while ago reflected fear, now only peace and calm dance in them in waves, mirroring mine. “I crave a forever with you, Tricia Ann Wilson. I don’t ever want you to leave my side, because I’d be lost without you. There is nothing else I would want, no one else can complete me, but you, sweetheart. I
want
you to be my wife. I
need
you to be my wife, to stand by me when times get tough, when the road gets rough, when darkness sets in, because You.Are.My.Everything. Please, marry me, sweetheart…please, be mine, forever.”

Then, I open the small velvety black box, turn it to face her, and focus on her beautiful face. I see nothing but love shining through her eyes.

“Say something. Don’t just stare at the darn thing.” I try to make my voice strong since my emotions are all over the place, but one thing holds true with my love for Trish. She is my constant.

“I love you, I’ll marry you! Yes, of course, it’s a yes! Oh my God, you will be my husband.”

“And, you will be my wife,” I say with finality and pride.

She starts to say something, but I put my finger on her lips. I take the ring off the little plush cushion and put it on her left ring finger, kiss it, then I kiss her.

“I know what you’re thinking; I am not doing this because of what’s going on. I’ve had the ring for a month now, and I’ve talked to your mom. Everyone knows, except of course, you; and don’t get mad at Roxy and Tami. I gave them specific instructions not to tell you. So, I am not taking this lightly, neither is it a knee jerk reaction, get me? Our wedding, our forever we both want will serve as a motivation for you and me to push forward, to beat this thing, whatever it is.”

“I know, Jake. Where my life once was in total darkness, you gave it light…You’re my
savior, thank you for being my strength,
and I hope I can do that for us.” She fights to keep the tears from escaping her eyes, that alone shows she’s fighting the fear I know is slowly imprisoning her.

So, I do what I know will overcome it…I tell her I love her. Our love will never bend to that fear…fear will surrender to it…for as long as I’m able, fear has to come through me to get to her.

I run my finger on her cheek, down her jaw, tracing her lips, my eyes following where my finger travels. “This is the best day of my life. You said yes to me, to be your husband. I love you, my future wife.”

“I love you, my future husband.”

Hearing her say those words, my heart soars like an eagle, my heart feels whole, it overflows with love for her, and it silences the worry in my mind. This woman completes me…frees me…she sustains me.

Chapter 18

Trish

As soon as I get Jake situated in his room, he’s poked, pricked, and fussed over. Needless to say, my sweet fiancé turns into Mr. Cranky. If they start an IV line, he’ll blow a gasket. The only thing that calms him down is the single chair sleeper he’s requested for me.

“Babe, can you sit here with me, please?” He gives me his best puppy dog pout.

“I don’t think I’m allowed to do that. I don’t want them to kick me out.”

“They won’t kick you out. I’ve told them you’re my wife.”

“What? You’re such a liar! They won’t believe you; you don’t even have a wedding ring,” I say, looking puzzled.

He raises his left hand, and on his ring finger, he has a platinum titanium band. I look at him with a confused look on my face; my jaw drops all the way below sea level. What the heck is going on? I can’t help it; I jump on his bed straddling him.

“Hey, where did you get that?” I ask him, grabbing his hand, inspecting the ring.

“Damn, I should surprise you more often. I’m getting hard for you, sweetheart.”

“I can tell, Mr. Oliver,” I say with my best bedroom voice, while grinding against his semi erection.

“Trish, you’re killing me! If you’re not going to make love to me, you better stop moving,” He groans.

“I better get off then, because we can’t have sex here! Anyone can just walk in on us.” I hop off and go to the bathroom to change into my jammies. I’m just putting on my pajama pants when I’m pushed against the wall.

“I like it when you play hard to get, Mrs. Oliver, and you’ll have that name soon.”

He rips off my panties and grabs my ass as I anchor my legs around his waist. He shoves his shorts down and enters me so fast and hard, we both let out a moan.

“You like that, baby?” He gives me another hard thrust and slowly pulls out, almost all the way and slams into me again, “How about this? Tell me what you need, Trish…do you want this slow or fast? I’ll give you want you need. You may as well tell me now, before I can’t do this anymore.” He looks at me with apprehension in his eyes, and it kills me to see him like this.

If we can’t have this connection at some point while he’s sick, I don’t want him to feel my love for him will somehow diminish. I need to assure him, I need to let him know, I’ll be here forever.

“However you want to give it to me, love. I don’t want you to worry about the physical part of our relationship. You know, I love you more than that. Your love is enough for me, more than enough, Jake.”

His groans echo within the four walls of the small bathroom. I’m sure if someone walked in the room, they’d know, without a shadow of a doubt, what we’re doing. I try to muffle my own moans by burying my face in his neck, giving him small wet kisses.