The Three Sisters (17 page)

“I bet it’s by Peter Max. He did like all sorts of neat stuff like that,” added Regina. Benny spotted Regina again, and slowly began circling around the group of students to try and see what he had missed before. If he were lucky, she would be braless. “It does look like something from a Beatles’ film,”
Regina commented.

“For your information, Miss,” interrupted Mrs. Anderson, shocked by the cultural naïvety of the three, “that is a Van Eyck, as anyone in my class could now tell you,” she added with a
haughty tone.

“Did he study with Peter Max?” asked Coito, realizing the unsuspecting woman had taken the bait.

By now Benny had reached his vantage point. He could see in the gap, but was unsure whether she was braless or not. The problem was that he could not get close enough to verify his suspicions without making his
intentions obvious.

“Young lady, Jan Van Eyck lived in the fifteenth century in Flanders. He is undoubtedly one of the greatest painters who ever lived, something which cannot be said for Peter Max.”

Unable to discover the truth, Benny began studying the rest of Regina more closely. That body, that face, Benny thought. Had he seen her in one of the magazines he had accidentally discovered hidden at the back of his brother’s closet under the old standup radio which no longer worked? No, he had seen her somewhere else, and not too
long ago.

“Are you sure?” asked Regina. “I’d bet anything that it’s by Peter Max. It certainly looks
like it.”

“Or at least his brother Hubert,” added Theodora, testing how broad Mrs. Anderson’s knowledge of art
really was.

“Regina,” Benny whispered under his breath, though no one heard him. Several nights before, he had seen some mousy man on TV talking about some women whose pictures had been shown on the screen, and these were those women. His mother watched the
700
Club
nightly, and with only one TV in the house, Benny often had the choice of watching the
700
Club
or nothing at all. Usually he chose nothing, but luckily for him he had chosen differently that night. Suddenly it all came back to him: the three shapely (and evil) women, the lovely Regina…and the $
10
,
000
. Just his luck, he thought, the chance of a lifetime lay before him and he was stuck with Mrs. Anderson. The mousy man had said she—they—were dangerous, but they hardly seemed so. Forgetting the reward money, Benny began to fantasize, imagining that he was going through the rites of passage with Regina in order to lose his virginity. He imagined himself acting calm and confident, walking up to Regina, telling her he knew who she was, and then telling her he would not turn her in if she would spend a night with him. But would it be worth $
10
,
000
?
He wondered.

“Even if Peter Max had a brother, I doubt they would put one of his paintings in the National Gallery,
young lady.”

So which would it be? $
10
,
000
or a night with Regina? Benny had to solve this quandary quickly, for his school group was scheduled to leave the National Gallery in twenty minutes. He wanted to compromise by doing both, but this seemed impossible. He racked his brains trying to discover a way to get both the reward money and Regina, but after endless moments of mental anguish, Benny had met with no success. Forced to choose between Regina and the money, the young capitalist finally came to a decision: he would call the mousy detective. Then he panicked. What was the number he was supposed to call? The $
10
,
000
began to slowly disappear. The police! He thought. He’d just call the police, and they would tell
the detective.

“You’ve never heard of his brother Hubert?” asked a shocked Coito. “He’s famous out in San Francisco. Why, he and I have been to bed dozens of times,” K concluded, providing the payoff. “That’s me in
the picture.”

The joke allowed Benny to sneak off undetected while the others laughed, and when Mrs. Anderson turned around to say, “Class, class,” to the giggling girls and laughing boys, she did not even notice Benny’s absence. She took her group into the next gallery, but before losing sight of the three, she turned around to allow the word
canaille
to fall from her lips. Mrs. Anderson hoped she would never see those
three again.

Meanwhile, Benny had gone downstairs where, true to his cause, he called the police. After he made them promise that they would tell the detective that he alone had seen the three, he told the officer where he and the three were and started counting his money. Benny had planned to rejoin his classmates before they left, but when he had to admit to the officer that he did not know how much longer the three would be at the National Gallery or where they would go after that, he was asked if he could follow them. “Well, yeah, I guess,” he replied, and promised to call back as soon as
he could.

New problems arose. If Benny left the National Gallery with Mrs. Anderson, he would lose track of Regina and possibly forfeit the $
10
,
000
. If he followed K’s culture vultures, he would get in trouble with the school and his mother. Needless to say, economic concerns triumphed, and Benny ran back upstairs hoping to find Regina, but not Mrs. Anderson. Benny found the three sisters and the Rams just as they were going down the steps which led to the entrance of the mall, and imagining himself a young Sherlock Holmes who could outwit the three, he followed their every move for the rest of
the day.

It was around two o’clock when die drei delinquent daughters left the National Gallery of Art. After spending brief moments at sundry parts of the Smithsonian as the group traveled away from the Capitol building, Coito realized that they had precious little time left to show the Rams their favorite site of all in the city: the Washington Monument, symbol of the Father of Our Nation, which towered above the city, resting on its superterranean, pudendal plateau, remaining as tough and rigid as anyone could imagine. “God, it’s obscene,”
Coito commented.

When the group finally arrived at the Monument, it was after four o’clock. The group was lucky enough to catch the last elevator up to the top for the day, but Benny, who had been following at a healthy distance, failed to get inside before closing and resigned himself to wait for the three sisters outside. He was ready to continue his detective work as soon as they emerged from the building. He had thought about going somewhere to notify the police of the three’s new location, but with no phone in sight and assured by the guard that the building was closing soon and that everyone would shortly be down, he waited for
the three.

After the usual boring talk given by the elevator operator, the five tourists were left atop the building and provided with a fabulous view of the city. This was by no means the three sisters’ first visit to the Washington Monument. Whenever friends visited them, the three always took them to the tower, and even when the three had no guests, one or all of them often stopped by the Monument “for inspiration.” Consequently, they had become friends with a couple of the people from the National Parks Service who worked there. Yet with all the visits K & Co. had made to the Washington Monument, Coito had never been struck by the thought which hit her that day. Coito got an idea which, at the time, she considered a stroke of genius. All the times she had looked upon this national monument and never once had such an inspired thought struck her. She was shamefaced that it had taken her so long. Suffice it to say, this one idea and the events precipitated by it changed
history forever.

“Listen, why don’t we stay here for the night?” asked Coito of her
two sisters.

“Stay here? But why?” asked Theodora, fearing the insidious smile on Coito’s face which always accompanied a wicked idea of hers. The Rams were looking at the
White House.

“To have an orgy, of course,” Coito declared, her
face beaming.

“Of course,” said a flabbergasted Theodora disapprovingly. She realized what Coito’s idea might lead to, but the tentiginous temptatation was too great for Regina who said, “K,
you’re brilliant.”

“Naturally,” rejoined Coito. “Why, anyone can see that the Washington Monument was built for orgies. Just as noses were made for eyeglasses and periods were made for tampaxes. What other purpose could they have?”
asked Coito.

“K, I hate to ruin your fantasy, but do you know what could happen to us if we stayed here for the night?” asked Theodora
the realist.

“We’d never get away with it. Things are difficult enough right now without you doing something so blatantly defiant. If they caught us, they’d throw away the key.” The Rams had
located Watergate.

“Maybe, but we’d have the greatest, most memorable night of our entire lives,” replied Coito. “This night would be the zenith of our earthly existences. What could compare with it? This would be one of those events we’d look back on when we’re dying and know that truly, life was worth living. It’d be an accomplishment envied by everyone in the United States, in
the world.”

“Now, you’re sounding
like Victor.”

“That hurt.”

“It wouldn’t be so great if we
were arrested.”

“Look Thea, anyone can be President. Ford and Carter proved that, but I ask you, how many people do you know of who can truthfully say that they participated in an orgy at the top of the
Washington Monument?”

“K, I didn’t like the idea of leaving Joan’s house in the first place, but now you have the audacity to suggest that we spend the night here having an orgy?” asked an enraged Theodora, half-whispering. “You’re crazy. We’re hunted criminals, K. And until Victor and his lawyers get things cleared up, if he gets things cleared up, anything we do could land us in prison for the rest of our lives,” she
added bluntly.

“Ah, there’s the tidal basin,” said
Mr. Ram.

“Don’t see any senators, though,” said
Mrs. Ram.

“Theodora, you don’t ever want to have any fun,”
complained Regina.

“Regina, being in prison is not my idea of having fun,” Theodora replied sharply, though softly so the other visitors to the Monument would not hear her. “Up until now I haven’t said much, K, but this law-defying binge you’ve been on of late has really made me wonder. If you want to destroy yourself, Coito Gott, go right ahead, but you can count me out. I have my own life to live.” Regina was taken aback at Theodora’s forcefulness. “Jesus, K, sometimes I almost wish
we’d never…”

“What’s de matter?” Coito interrupted in a facetious tone of voice. “Doesn’t de idea of an orgy here appeal to you? Or do ’ou want to go home an’ wead a book?” Coito asked in a
baby-like voice.

“Of course the idea appeals to me. Sure it’d be fun, but not now and not here, dammit. What will Victor say if he
finds out?”

“Who cares about Victor? Look, what difference would it make whether we had the orgy tonight or a year from now? After all, once an idea comes into existence, it can’t be destroyed. Just like the priest who asked if they couldn’t throw away the formula for the atomic bomb after World War II. Can’t be undone. So sooner or later we’ll have to do it. Besides, it’d be riskier and more dangerous now, and thus more fun,” promised K as she suggestively raised
her eyebrows.

“You’re a masochist, K. So just who’s going to service our accounts tonight, may
I ask?”

“Oh, you can see the Capitol really good over here,” said
Mrs. Ram.

“Are we going to invite the whole Kennedy Center up here, or are we going to depend on
Mr. Ram?”

“We’ll use the National Parks employees, of course,” Coito calmly replied. “Bill and John both know us, more by sight than by name, and I can tell they’ve both got the hots for Regina and wouldn’t complain about jumping on top of either one of us. I’m sure with some encouragement they would come around to our point
of view.”

“You’re stark-raving
mad, K.”

“Compliments will get you nowhere” Coito responded while trying to play the part, but then she turned serious. “No, listen. I’ve got it all figured out. We seduce the National Parks guards. After everyone else leaves, all of us stay. Later tonight, all of us will leave and no one will be the wiser, except for our three fellow participants. Why, I bet they’ve been working here for years and never thought about having an orgy here. After we tell them our idea, we’ll have to fight them off to get us to leave in the morning. Of course, it’s not exactly comfortable up here, what with these hard, cold floors and dull walls, but who’s looking
for comfort?”

“And what about
the Rams?”

“We’ll give them cab fare to go back to
Susan’s house.”

“I’m not going to do
it, K.”

“Fine with me, but I’ve decided to stay whether you leave or not,” said Coito, totally unaffected by
Theodora’s decision.

“It would be fun,” added Regina, sharing her desire to stay, “but maybe Theodora is right, K.” Moments of interminable silence followed between the three as Coito remained resolute in her determination, and Theodora tried to decide what
to do.

“Damn you, K,” said Theodora. Coito smiled, realizing she had won. “You know I won’t leave if you stay because without me you’d just screw things up and land us all in jail for sure. But if I stay, I might still be able to keep the three of us free. You just better realize though, if Victor ever finds out, he’ll skin you
alive, K.”