The Bare Necessities (Non-Profane Edition) (37 page)

Paul's face went a
bit purpler, and he scowled at his little sister. “This is …”

“Saving fifty jobs
and opening up another fifty. I have put an offer on a warehouse a
few miles away. We are buying in the stuff we can't make here so
clothing, badges, posters, etc. And the toys which can be assembled
here will be ...”

“But we make
machinery.”

“No, we have
several assembly lines which can make machinery. But in the
recession, you have to be flexible. So we are being flexible. It's
Greg's idea and …”

“You let that
thieving little …”

“Don't finish that
sentence,” Lucinda shouted and stared at her brother. “Sit down.”
She pointed at the chair in front of her, and Paul shook his
head.

“I've had enough
of this, sod you Luci. I've had enough.”

Lucinda licked her
lips. “Your house is on the books of this factory. Walk out of this
factory and it will go on the market this afternoon.” Paul stopped
as his hands reached for the door knob. “Now sit down,” she ordered
and gestured for Greg to leave the office.

Her management
consultant put his pen down and sighed. “I'll get lunch. Fancy
anything?”

“I'll get myself
something later. But, do us a favour, talk to the sandwich shop
about putting a buffet on at the end of the week here for
everyone.” Paul snorted and Lucinda turned to him, hovering next to
her desk. “Sit down.”

He gulped and
pulled the chair roughly from underneath the table. “Haven't you
humiliated me enough?”

“I haven't
humiliated you at all,” Lucinda replied icily. “You are my big
brother, and I love you.” Paul shook his head, and Lucinda leant
back on her chair. “I know you don't like what Jack is doing, but I
promise you, it is making him happy. And that Harriet girl of yours
is bright and sharp, but she is going to take after you. This deal
with the Bare Necessities is good for the firm. Yeah, OK, you might
not like it, but financially it's pretty special. I had an
opportunity, so I've taken it. Now, this expansion, reopening up
the two assembly lines, plus not closing the two you were planning
to shut, plus opening the warehouse, gets our name in the local
paper. Here's a company doing well. Plus, we're clearing around 30%
at least after costs on each product, which is then being sold on
by the group at another similar mark up. It makes business sense,
can you see that?”

“I don't want to
encourage …”

“Ignore that,”
Lucinda interrupted. “It makes good business sense, can you see
that?”

Paul gulped and
sighed. “Yes,” he snapped. “If it all works out.”

“It will work
out,” Lucinda responded with a smile. “I'm very excited about it.
As should you be, because when you get control of this business
back it will be twice as profitable.” Her eyes widened.

“And when will
that be?”

“When I have
taught you the art of humility,” Lucinda said, rubbing her hands.
“How much better do you know your staff as a supervisor?” Paul
grunted angrily.

“I see what you
are trying to do, but it'll just make me angry.”

“I don't care,”
his sister replied. “Now I was hoping to take you to lunch.” Paul
bit his lip and sighed, rubbing his eyes. “I really don't want to
fall out with you,” Lucinda promised. “I want to quit this as a
solo role and give you back the factory after twelve months, with
it being in safe hands, and me as a part-time co-managery thing.
You're not a bad manager, but you are cold and aloof at times, and
you rule with your heart, not your head. I know I'm not perfect,
but neither are you, and I will shake that arrogance out of you.”
She licked her lips and took a deep breath. “You might be rampantly
arrogant at times, but I still love you more than anyone, because
you are my brother. And there are times when you really hate me, I
know. Now, being one of them maybe, but if I hadn't have done what
I did, Jack would be here miserable and you would be cutting staff
as you had this tunnel, narrow vision of what we should do as it's
what our dad said we should do. Now, are you coming to lunch 'cause
I'm starving?”

Paul grunted
angrily. “It's not your place …”

“I have a vested
interest in the success of this company,” Lucinda replied. “And so
it is my place if I think your beliefs and emotions are harming the
prospects of the factory. Now, are we going to lunch?”

Paul sighed. “Yeah
OK,” he said wearily. “But I don't like this contract thing one
bit. It's just encouraging him.”

“That's why I'm
running the factory for the time being,” she teased and smiled.
“But I bet you like the money we'll make of it, right? Just think
of that. You might have a wedding to pay for anyway. That Paige is
a lovely girl and Jack is obviously smitten with her,” she added
with a broad grin as she picked up her coat.

* * * * *

Paige clapped
her hands together in the evening dusk and looked across at her
sister. “Hello? Hello? Can I get everyone's attention please?” A
few commuters stopped and looked across at the beer garden where
the red-haired singer was sat with her sister, and a sizeable
number of her sister's classmates and friends. “Hi,” she shouted
and coughed. “I'm Paige, member of the Bare Necessities and my
sister here, Hazel, made a bet with her friends that if I got to
number one in the singles' charts, she would sing naked in town.”
Paige turned to face her blushing sister and told her to stand up.
“Isn't that true?”

Hazel nodded
and the small group of commuters began to swell. “Yeah,” she
muttered as a handful of her friends sniggered behind her.

“And what
happened to I Am Free a few days ago?”

Hazel pursed
her lips and sniffed. “Reached number one,” she muttered to whoops
of delight from her friends behind her.

“So what do
you need to do?” Paige teased with a giggle.

“Sing naked,”
Hazel admitted to Paige's wild gesturing.

“So Hazel
Simmons,” Paige asked, playing to the ever expanding group of
commuters stopped outside the pub and in the small beer garden. “I
believe you have to sing my song that got you to number one!”

Hazel
squeaked. “Yes.” Paige passed her the imaginary microphone and all
eyes fell on the anxious teenager. Paige looked to see her shift
from one foot to another and her classmates began to giggle and
taunt her little sister.

She saw
Hazel's hands shake and the nervous teenager rubbed her nose and
took a few deep breaths. She was getting anxious and Paige looked
at the younger girl in the eye, and smiled warmly at her, but it
was not reciprocated. “Don't,” Hazel cried as one of her classmates
pulled at the waist of her trousers from behind her. “I can do
it.”

“Well do it,
girlie,” the heavy accent of her friend called back. Paige glanced
over at the assembled commuters and saw a restlessness in both them
and Hazel. Paige had suspected that her sister would have doubts at
having to sing naked in front of a group of strangers and
unbuttoned her own skirt, pushing her underwear and tartan clothing
to the floor.

A few
wolf-whistles punctuated the lecherous encouragement that Hazel was
experiencing and, as Paige's bra joined her pile of clothing on the
pub table, she looked at Hazel. “Come on, let's sing it together.
Just us sisters. Unless anyone want to join us?” Her eyes glanced
towards the assembled crowd, and then watched as her sister slowly
stripped, to cheers and claps.

“Thanks,”
Hazel whispered. Paige simply smiled and held out her hand that was
taken by Hazel, before starting the introduction to her song that
was proudly sitting at the top of the singles' charts in seven
countries.

Hazel's hand
stopped shaking as they reached the chorus and dozens of people
joined in singing, although none were prepared to lose their
clothes. Paige watched her sister as she smiled broadly during the
second verse and, although the two girls were far from pitch
perfect, they got a round of applause at the end of their
rendition.

Paige nodded
towards her friend's classmates, most of whom were filming Hazel's
show. “Cowards,” she cried, as her sister frantically got dressed.
“The lot of you. Should have joined us.”

“Ahhh … we
aren't like you,” a teenage girl cried.

“What?” The
naked Paige asked as she stared at her sister. “Brave? I know!”

“I don't want
people seeing me naked,” the slightly podgy girl spat back. Paige
sneered and shrugged.

“You've got
nothing to be scared of,” Paige snapped with raised eyebrows.
“You've got way bigger assets than me!” The crowd laughed at
Paige's indignation, and she turned to her sister balancing on one
leg as she put her trousers back on. “It was fun, right?”

Hazel pulled
her jeans up to her waist and sniffed. “Yeah, a bit” she muttered
and Paige reached forward to hug her.

“Then now you
understand,” she replied.

* * * * *

“I declare the
Bare Necessities Naturism Centre open!” A naked Paige cut the
ribbon as dozens of flashbulbs lit up the hall, and she looked at
her naked band members either side of her. “We have spent a lot of
time doing this up,” she announced to the small crowd of naturists.
“And we have activities and fun for everyone. Let's Party!” There
was a small round of applause and Paige jumped down from the
stage.

Paige was not
lying; the old childcare centre that Christian Outrage had wanted
to save was on large, but crucially secluded premises and Paige's
eyes had lit up the moment she had seen the property a couple of
days before the auction.

The vast majority
of their new “Naturism Centre” was a newly opened childcare centre,
offering excellent value-for-money childcare for those parents
happy to have naturist experiences for their children and the band
had installed Paige's mother as the manager. Jack had wanted to
call it the “Kinudergarten,” but Paige had said the play on words
was too subtle and they instead named it “The Bare Necessities Kids
Club.”

Paige had
installed a well equipped naturist youth centre consisting of
games, a lounge, activities and a cinema room at the front of the
building – and separate from the childcare part of the business –
as well as the promise of plenty of garden parties and events in
their expansive green space at the rear of the property.

Paige's dad hugged
her as she helped serve champagne to their guests. “Looks amazing,”
he told her as glanced around the colourful big hall that lead out
into the garden. “Proud of you. Should be a nice little
home-from-home.”

“Yeah,” Paige
agreed. “And let's hope we can get some people to try naturism, eh?
We are thinking of putting a hot-tub on the patio for Spring next
year.”

He nodded and
smiled, looking around the room. His eyes fell upon Greg and
Lucinda, and he bit his lip. “What's she doing here?”

“Oh Dad, please
don't cause trouble,” Paige muttered. “She is Jack's aunt.”

“I know who she
is, but …”

“Go and speak to
her, make some peace with her,” Paige suggested and pressed her
naked body against her father as she hugged him again. “She'll be
spending a lot of time around us.” Robert snorted, and Paige cocked
her head and looked into his eyes. “For me? I don't want to have to
separate our families, and if Jack ever asks that question and I
say yes, then you two will both be at the top table.”

“Hey, but …”

“It's OK,” Paige
interrupted. “If he was to ask tomorrow I wouldn't, but one day he
might and I would probably say yes. So please, go and speak to her,
just say hello.”

He caught
Lucinda's eye and forced a smile at her and she rubbed her eyes,
looking back at him. “I'll go say hello,” he muttered, and the
naked man strode over to see his naked ex-wife.

“Hello stranger,”
a voice whispered from behind Paige. “You miss me?”

“It's only been
five days,” Paige replied and purred as he kissed her neck. “But
yes, I've missed you.”

He spun Paige
around to face him and licked his lips. “Now I know why you spent
four hundred and fifty thousand,” Jack teased his girlfriend with a
grin. “We better extend our tour by another twenty dates to pay for
it.” Paige giggled, and she turned around to face her partner.

“We don't need
to,” Paige said airily and stroked her hair back. “It came out of
the advance. As well you know!”

“Yeah, I don't
mind. But I was hoping that we might be able to get a place
together and put a recording studio in it as well,” he suggested
and watched Paige smile at him. “And I know Claire will want to get
a place with Andre.”

“Not necessarily,”
Paige replied and Jack's eyes twinkled. “OK, what's that look
for?”

“Nothing. Well,
not until Claire tells you.”

“What? Tell me
what?”

Jack's resolve
crumbled under Paige's withering stare, and he sighed. “Just that
Andre and I were in Hatton Gardens last week.” Paige's scowl turned
to confusion, and he scratched the back of his head. “The
jewellers.”

“What?”

“He was looking at
engagement rings,” Jack whispered, and Paige gasped.

“Like diamonds and
stuff! She didn't tell me she was engaged and …” Paige scanned the
room for her bandmate and Jack had to grab her by the arm.

“She's not. And
Andre didn't buy one. But he wanted to go and have a look, so we
did. And I think he is going back. Really does it surprise you?
They've moved into Andre's new flat, been on holiday together.
Always being photographed out together.”

“Are they?”

“Yes. Don't you
read the gossip columns I leave lying around the house?”

“No,” Paige
snapped. “Well, not since they printed photographs of me in a
bikini.” Her eyes looked at Jack. “I promise you, that bikini was
photoshopped onto me. I would not wear something like that. It's a
disgrace that was. I was swimming naked, I swear.”