Social Skills (26 page)

“Us?
Us?
There is no us, Ronnie. I’m
gay
,
and you fucking know that!” Jared whirled around and gestured toward Connor
with a harsh, jerking motion. “I want to be with
him!
”

With him.
Finally,
Jared had told her. Screamed it at her, actually. The burst of happiness was so
intense Connor had to dig a nail into his hand to keep from jumping into Jared’s
arms.

Veronica
tilted her head. “Oh. They told me, but I didn’t think it was true. I thought
they were lying. They lie all the time.”

“Who
told you what, Ronnie? What the fuck are you talking about? Why are you always
saying shit that doesn’t make sense?”

What
was
she talking about? A dull ache started in the back of Connor’s
neck, probably because he was so tense he’d barely moved a millimeter since
Veronica had appeared.

She
sat heavily on the bed. “I’m not sure. Did you want to see a movie?”

Jared
thrust both hands into his hair, yanking at the curls. “Why did you tell
everyone about me? To get some sort of revenge? Do you hate me that much?”

Veronica’s
eyes brimmed with tears. “I don’t hate you. Why would you say that?”

“That’s
it!” Jared flung an arm toward the door and pointed fiercely. “Get out!”

Veronica
hunched in on herself, quivering as giant tears slid down her face. “Don’t hate
me, don’t hate me,” she murmured through her sobs.

“Get
out of my room right now! I don’t ever want to see you again!”

The ache
spread to Connor’s skull. Something was wrong here. No conversation he’d ever
observed from a safe distance had gone this way.

“Jared,”
he said quietly.

“I
said get out!” Jared continued, lost in his tirade. “I want you out of my
fucking—”

“Jared!”
His voice erupted much louder this time.

Jared
whirled to face him. “What? What is it?” he spat, eyes still blazing.

Connor
looked back at Veronica. She’d been his enemy since first sight, but right now
the only thing he could see was a pitiful, broken human being. Maybe she wasn’t
the evil seductress he’d always thought her to be.

“Stop
shouting for a minute.”

“What?
Are you actually defending her?”

“No.”
Connor drew in a startled breath. He’d never expected to be defending Veronica
in his lifetime…but something more than romantic rivalries
had
to be going on here. “Um, has she been eating enough lately?”

“What?”

“Eating.
Has she been eating? Doesn’t it look like she’s lost a lot of weight since the
beginning of the year?”

Jared
turned a skeptical eye toward Veronica, who was still crying in a fetal
position. “Oh. I guess she has lost weight,” he mumbled.

Connor
stood and approached her slowly. “Hi, um, Ronnie?” She blinked at him a few
times and stopped crying. “I’m Connor. Do you remember me?”

She
shook her head. “Why are you here?”

Jared
threw up his hands with a disgusted snort.

Connor
tuned him out, hunkering over so he could meet Veronica’s eyes. “Ronnie, have
you been eating enough lately? You’re not trying to lose weight on purpose, are
you?”

“Eating?”
Her brows furrowed. “We could go out to dinner, if you like. I think I know a
place where they can’t find us.”

From
behind his shoulder, Connor heard Jared inhale sharply, as if it had just dawned
on him he and Veronica had been having completely different conversations since
she’d arrived.

“Fuck,”
Jared whispered. “Maybe she’s high right now.”

Connor
straightened up. “I think maybe we should take her to Student Health.”

“Do
you think she’s anorexic or something? Is that what’s making her act like this?”

“I
don’t know…but I think there’s definitely something wrong.”

“Fuck,”
Jared said again. “Maybe if I hadn’t been so wrapped up in my own problems—”

“You
can’t blame yourself for this,” Connor interrupted. Forgetting Veronica was in
the room, he stepped forward to rub Jared’s arm.

Jared
pulled away. “Come on, Ronnie. Let’s go for a ride.”

Chapter Twenty-four

The
brown chair where Connor sat had a tear in its cushion, and he absentmindedly
twirled his fingers in the cottony substance that spilled out. By some
nonverbal agreement, neither he nor Jared spoke, not even when the nurse
whisked Veronica away to check her blood pressure and weight.

He
wasn’t sure why Jared had brought him along. His dorm was out of the way, he
supposed, but there hadn’t even been a half-hearted offer to drop him off. What
purpose could he possibly serve here?

Shifting
in his seat, he began working up the courage to ask, but Jared’s drawn brows
and pressed-together lips stopped him.

Connor
shook his head to clear away the insecurity. He was probably the last thing on
Jared’s mind right then.

The
nurse might have drawn blood, because when Veronica returned she threw herself
into Jared’s arms. “You won’t let them hurt me again, will you?”

Jared’s
deeply-etched frown grew deeper. “Please just sit and wait for the doctor. You
need to calm down.”

“Veronica
Straton?” a male voice called.

Jared
jumped up, pulling Veronica with him. “Yeah, here she is.”

The
man walked over and offered her a hand. “Hello, Veronica. I’m Dr. Ramirez. Would
you like to come into my office for a little chat?”

“Go
on.” Jared gave her a push, but Veronica dug her nails into his arm.

“Don’t
let them take me!”

Jared
winced, then glanced at the doctor guiltily. “She’s been like this for a little
while now.”

“I
won’t go anywhere!” Veronica went on. “What if they’re in there?”

The
doctor nodded like he understood exactly what she was talking about—which
hardly seemed possible. “Maybe you’d feel better if your friends could
accompany you?”

Connor
scooted his chair back until the wall stopped him from going any further. “You
go, Jared. I’ll just wait out h—”

Before
he could finish, Jared grabbed his t-shirt to yank both him and Veronica down
the hallway and straight into the doctor’s office.

It
wasn’t the sterile white examination room Connor had expected. Bookshelves
lined the walls, and in the middle of the room were several chairs, an
old-fashioned desk, and one dark green couch. He sat nervously on the edge of a
moss-colored cushion, making himself as small as possible when Jared and
Veronica squeezed in beside him.

Why
had Jared forced him in here? It wasn’t like he really knew anything about
Veronica…and if she ever remembered who he was, he rather doubted she’d want
him around.

“All
right, Veronica, why don’t you tell me about how you’re feeling today?” The
doctor sat in a chair beside them with clipboard and pen in hand.

Veronica
pursed her lips. “I don’t know.”

“You
seem a little upset. Can you tell me what’s been bothering you?”

“My
suitemates are trying to get me.” She shrugged. “They say they aren’t, but I
can tell.”

The
doctor’s eyes crinkled slightly. “What makes you think they’re trying to hurt
you?”

“They
watch me. They whisper things, all the time now.”

Jared
dropped his head into his hands, and the knot in Connor’s stomach threatened to
engulf his heart. The couch he was on was too small for all their bodies. Too
confining. His left hand sought out an open space, and he began rhythmically
tapping out some Vivaldi to calm himself.

The
doctor was much better at maintaining composure. “What sort of things do they
say to you?”

“Stuff
to get back at me. They want me dead.”

“What?”
Jared exploded, interrupting the Vivaldi and further shattering Connor’s
nerves. “What are you talking about? No one said that! I thought you guys were
just having some stupid girl-rivalries fight.”

Dr.
Ramirez scribbled something on his clipboard. “Let’s let Veronica finish.”

Jared
did not seem convinced this was the best course of action. He folded his arms
across his chest with a scowl.

Connor
eyed the doctor, trying to determine what he thought of Veronica’s babbling,
but he couldn’t get a read. He eventually gave up and focused on the door
instead. He really had no right to be there, listening to Veronica’s business. If
only he could slip out…

“It’s
like a black tunnel,” Veronica said when she had the floor again, “and people
in there keep
saying
things. Like now they said Jared is gay. They’re
lying. They want him for themselves.”

Jared’s
cheeks went red, and Connor felt his following suit.

“But
we’re meant to be together, Jared. You know that.”

Jared
dropped his head again. “We broke up last semester,” he muttered. Then he
looked up at the doctor with imploring eyes. “You gotta understand, I tried to
stay friends with her. I mean, I knew she was needy, but she wasn’t acting this
crazy then.”

Dr.
Ramirez gave Jared the same
professional-understanding
nod he’d given Veronica earlier. “Let’s refrain from placing labels right
now. Have you noticed any other changes in Veronica’s behavior?”

“Uh,
she’s lost weight, I guess. She started missing class, getting into fights with
her suitemates…and sometimes she does say weird stuff, but I just figured it
was ’cause she was high or something.”

“Why
are you always asking about drugs?” Veronica cried. “Who’s telling you that? I
don’t do hard drugs. They told you, didn’t they? They’re lying!”

Jared
turned toward Connor. “This is nuts,” he mumbled under his breath. He didn’t
look away after speaking—he just kept staring at Connor like he was
waiting
for something. Something important.

What
could he want? What did Connor even have to offer? Nervously, he leaned into
Jared, just barely brushing against his arm. A flicker of gratitude crossed
Jared’s face before he was back to frowning.

Oh.
So
that
was why he’d been dragged in there.
It wasn’t about convenience, or Veronica…
Jared
needed him.

“They
keep lying.” Veronica started to cry. “Maybe they’ll win. Maybe I’m already
dead.”

“Ronnie…”
Jared groaned.

“Veronica,”
Doctor Ramirez cut in gently. “Do you believe someone is trying to physically
hurt you?”

“We
could all be dead,” Veronica responded, gazing past him and out a window.

The
doctor rose and set down his notes. “Jared, I think you should walk Veronica
down to the hospital. I’m going to call ahead and let them know to expect her. I’m
concerned about the weight loss, and I’d really like her to stay there a few
days for an evaluation.”

“The
hospital?” Jared lurched forward in his seat. “Is it really serious? What’s
wrong with her?”

“I
can’t diagnose anything from this short a session,” Dr. Ramirez said, but there
was a suspiciously tense note in his voice. “I think it would be best for her
to be under observation for a little while.”

“Oh,
uh, okay.” Jared stood, and Veronica hopped up with him, reaching for his hand.
He frowned at her but let her continue holding it. “We’ll get going then.”

They
stumbled into the twilight and took off down the short stretch of sidewalk. Veronica
still clung to Jared, and Connor looked at anything—a streetlamp, a slew
of passing midsize sedans, weeds sprouting in cracks in the concrete—just
so he could avoid seeing her hand in his. He had a selfish urge to rip her bony
fingers away and place his own in their spot…but for now he forced himself to
be content she was pretending he wasn’t even there. The last thing he needed
was to end up as part of her crazy ramblings.

Jared’s
mood visibly worsened the second they stepped under the fluorescent lights of
the hospital, his jaw clenching so tightly his temples bulged outwards. A
petite blond nurse in dancing mouse scrubs had Veronica sign some papers, then
escorted them onto an elevator. She smiled at them as the doors slid open on
the fifth floor, but underneath the expression was a kind of
I’m-so-sorry-this-is-happening
look that made Connor’s stomach turn.

“Well,
dears”—she gestured down the hallway toward two sets of imposing double
doors—“this is where you say goodbye, I’m afraid. Visiting hours are over
for the evening, but if Veronica would like to see you, you can come back
between noon and two tomorrow.” She draped an arm over Veronica. “Come along,
hon.”

“Jared?”
Veronica asked, her voice wobbling near tears.

“I’ll
see you later, Ronnie, okay?” Jared pulled free of her hand. “Go and get some
rest.”

The
nurse led Veronica toward the first set of doors. She slid a card through a
lock to gain entry, then checked Veronica’s pockets before they took the next
entrance and disappeared from sight.

Jared
sagged against the wall, right next to the sign announcing their location in
both Braille and raised white letters: the Psychiatric Unit. “Jesus, Connor.”
He heaved out what seemed like all the breath his lungs could carry. “This is…out
of control.”

Connor
nodded solemnly.

“Fuck.”
Jared’s hand trembled as he passed it over his face. “Just…fuck.”

“Jared,”
Connor murmured, reaching out to embrace him. Jared moved away.

“Not
here,” he said gruffly.

“Oh.
O-okay.” No one was in the hallway, and only an uninterested nurse was anywhere
within earshot.

Jared
probably had too much on his mind to realize nobody would care about him
receiving a hug. But if he wasn’t going to accept comfort out in the open, then
Connor was just going to have to take action for both their sakes. He grabbed
Jared’s hand and dragged him into a nearby bathroom.

“Connor…what
the hell are you doing?” Jared glared, jerking free. “Someone could see us, and
I’m not ready to—”

“Shh.
No one is here. Visiting hours are over.”

Jared
glanced around the empty restroom and crossed his arms. “Fine. Then what are we
doing here?”

“You’re
upset. I…I just wanted you to calm down.”

“Of
course I’m upset. What the fuck is wrong with her? Is this…my fault?”

“I’m
sure she’ll be fine.” Connor ran his hand along Jared’s back. “Maybe she just
needs some sleep and some vitamins. Or maybe you’re right, maybe she is doing
drugs. They’ll find out.” That sounded reasonable enough. Besides, words of
comfort were easier than thinking of the alternative.

Jared’s
rigid stance slowly dissolved. He unfolded his arms and stepped forward so he
could rest his chin on Connor’s head. “I hope you’re right. This has been one
hell of a day. Let’s just go home, okay?”

Connor
pressed in even closer. He still felt small against Jared’s muscular body, but
not as small as he once had. “Yeah, let’s go.”

***

The
last light of evening had faded into night by the time they trudged into Jared’s
suite. Exhausted and single-minded in his desire for
bed-in-Jared’s-arms
, Connor didn’t slow or even glance up from the
tile as he followed Jared to his room.

But
then Jared came to a sudden stop, and Connor bounced off his tense back and
stumbled into the doorframe.

Ben
stood in the center of the room, with Jared’s duffle bag in his hands. “So,
what, you’re moving out? Is that what this means?” He tossed the bag at Jared’s
feet.

Jared
took a step back, and Connor skirted away to avoid another collision.

“Fuck,
man,” Ben continued. “I realize you guys are probably…sleeping together”—he
paused to cringe—“but isn’t it a little early to be playing house?”

“Why
the fuck do you care?” Jared growled.

Connor
bit his tongue in the same abused spot from earlier, reopening the wound. He
shrank back against the door as the tension made the air feel too thick to
breathe.

Ben
opened and closed his mouth a few times. Then he hung his head, staring down at
his pile of laundry on the floor. “Okay, look, this is…kinda weird…and I’m not…I’m
not sure how I feel about it yet…”

“Well
that’s good.” Jared kicked a dirty towel that lay on his half of the room. “Because
I don’t give a damn how you feel.”

Ben huffed
and folded his arms. “I can see that you’re pissed, and maybe I didn’t react
the best way…but how the hell is someone supposed to react when they find that
shit out? I mean, you basically lied to me—”

Jared’s
hands curled into fists. “My life is none of your fucking business.”

“What
I’m trying to say,” Ben cut back in, glaring, “what I’m trying to say is that I
don’t want you to get lost or whatever. I mean, I’ve never really had any
friends that were…uh, gay…but college is supposed to be about new experiences,
right?”

Connor
watched the subtle shift in Jared’s expression—from anger to surprise in
a half-an-inch lift of his furrowed brow.