Sex Secrets of an American Geisha (6 page)

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Authors: Py Kim Conant

Tags: #Sexual Instruction, #Love & Romance, #Health & Fitness, #Social Science, #Asian American Studies, #Sex Instruction for Women, #Asian American Women - Sexual Behavior, #Family & Relationships, #Sexuality, #Asian American Women, #Self-Help, #Ethnic Studies, #Sexual Behavior, #Women's Studies

BOOK: Sex Secrets of an American Geisha
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To have an environment conducive to exploring your sexuality, you must have your own room outside of your parents’ home. Don’t wait until you are thirty-four, as I did, to move out on your own. Do it now, with roommates if necessary. Doing so may be expensive, but you must have the privacy of your own bedroom in order to explore your sexuality. You Younger Sisters who are married or in long-term committed relationships also need to plan some time when your partner is not home and your chil dren are reliably asleep or away from home. Lock the bedroom door. I want you to find privacy so that you can explore your own sexual needs and desires. Even if you are already a woman of some sexual experi ence and satisfaction, this hot, sexy American Geisha recommends that you find private time to become even more sexually intimate with yourself, before you begin your search for your man. (Of course, you’ll also continue to masturbate while you date, and even after you are married!)

 

Items for Your Self-Love Sessions
To begin, you’ll need to purchase these three items for your self-love ses sions:

 

 
  • One, two, or three battery-operated vibrators
  • A two-sided mirror with handle
  • Baby oil, unscented mineral oil, petroleum jelly, or such water-based lubricants as Astroglide or K-Y Jelly
This is all the equipment that you absolutely need. You may already own the mirror and lubricant. Either now or later, once you are familiar with your vagina and its sexual responsiveness and desires, consider adding the following items to further expand your explorations and pleasures:

 

 
  • Incense and candles, because your sense of smell can be so power fully erotic
  • Sexy music, to help you set the mood
  • Silk sheets, because they feel so sensual
  • Sexy silk lingerie, because it feels so good on you and you look so sexy wearing it
  • Perfume, because it makes you feel so feminine
  • Soft-core guy-girl or girl-girl videos, with story lines as well as sex
  • Sexy literature and magazines, both stories and photos
  • Sexy fine art (paintings, photographs, sculpture), to add an element of class A plug-in vibrator, such as the Hitachi Magic Wand
  • Hard-core guy-girl videos, without stories—just hard-core fucking and sucking
  • Other sexy toys, such as handcuffs, ropes, masks, clothes, and dil dos, to fulfill some of your sex fantasies
As a feminine and sexy woman, you must get to know your vagina (or “cunt,” a perfectly acceptable alternative word for the female sex organs, though I won’t often use it in this book) both visually and sensually. Let me put it this way: You cannot be a feminine, sexy woman if you do not know your vagina intimately. . . and proudly! A few words about terminology: So as not to offend some readers, I use “vagina,” rather than the four or five-letter slang alternatives, to refer to the female genitalia. Even though the vagina is technically only the interior por tion of a woman’s genitalia (specifically the canal leading to the cervix), for the sake of convenience I usually use it in this book to refer to the entire fe male genital area. The precise word for the exterior female genitalia is “vulva.” A man pees with his penis, but he makes love with his cock. I use the word “cock” in this book; you should use it, too. And, sometimes, to “have intercourse” or “make love” will suffice; at other times “fuck” will seem most appropriate.

 

Shave Your Beautiful Vagina
Su Nu, one of three female sex advisors to the legendary Chinese Yellow Emperor, Huang Ti (who took the throne in 2678 b.c.), advised him that “a desirable woman has a tender, pliable temperament, with a liquid voice, black and silky hair, soft muscles, and small bones. She is neither too tall nor too short, neither too large nor too small. Her vulva is high up front; her mons is hairless; and she is rich in fluids. She is between twenty-five [and] thirty. While copulating, her fluids flow abundantly, and her body trembles helplessly and is covered with perspiration.”1 I hardly think the Yellow Emperor’s sex adviser was right to limit the age range of a desirable woman to between twenty-five and thirty. Eighteen to eighty-five seems more reflective of 2006. Nor do I think any woman is too tall or too short to be totally feminine and beautiful. What I do like is the advice that a de sirable woman’s mons (or mound of Venus) should be “hairless.” In Asia, such a woman is known as a White Tigress, her hairlessness compared to a rare tigress without stripes, and is thought to be very feminine and frankly sexual.
To appreciate the absolute beauty and sexy feminine quality of your vagina, please shave carefully and totally, all the way back to and around your vaginal opening. If you like, you may leave a short, wispy, thin, well trimmed vertical strip of pubic hair directly below the navel and above the clitoris that indicates to a man that you carefully cultivate the garden of your vagina and clitoris. Maintain this garden; once you are in a relation ship, keep this soft, beautiful skin naked by shaving daily. Both you and he will feel more sexual with your inner and outer vulval lips, clitoris, and vagi nal entrance fully revealed and oh so beautiful and attractive. The almost babylike softness and smoothness of your shaved vaginal area will feel so good both to you and to his fingers, tongue, and cock.
To put it simply, the sexy American Geisha secret that I reveal to you here is that your vaginal area and clitoris are too beautiful to hide from ei ther yourself or your man, and that the presence of pubic hair beyond just a wisp is not sexy and feminine to most men.
Men are hairier than women; they often have quite hairy bodies. Heavy body hair is a masculine, yang, trait, not a feminine, yin, trait. The American Geisha knows that her now nearly hairless body is, generally, in stark con trast to the man’s larger, hairier body. Opposites do attract. Your Good Man will love this difference and will feel himself to be a more masculine man, large and relatively hairy, while seeing you as a nearly hairless, feminine woman. My vagina gets a little damp just thinking of how all the elements of my femininity make my man more masculine, both to himself and to me. His cock probably twitches just a little bit toward greater hardness just thinking of his feminine, fully shaved woman.
Another of the Yellow Emperor’s female sex experts, known as the Woman Plain, said that the woman who meets the standard has “slender limbs, delicate tissues, soft flesh, elegant texture, skin pure white and pale, finger joints slender and hollow, ears and eyes elevated. . . . She has no body hair, her body is as smooth as silk, and her pubic region is as soft as grease. If you practice the Way with this kind of woman you won’t get tired all night, and as the husband you will be benefited as a consequence.”2 Again ignore the counsel about skin color, and notice the advice about a lack of body hair, smooth skin, and the genital area being “as soft as grease.”
The Asian Geisha is taught over a period of many years the various se crets of how to excite, lure, and entice men. In a word, how to attract men. As an American Geisha you too must learn, but much more quickly, how to be a feminine, sexy, sexual woman. (Other elements of the Asian Geisha’s training, such as the art of conversation, dance, song, music, and even the elaborate tea service, are, of course, beyond the scope of this book.)
To repeat myself (because the lesson is so important), the Asian Geisha knows that she should do all she can to make her man feel more masculine, more of a man. She knows that she wants to be as feminine to him as she can be. The American Geisha, too, loves the contrast: the female yin and the male yang, the stark differences between men and women. She knows that her Good Man is highly attracted to a feminine woman who encourages his strong sense of masculinity. Men want to feel quite masculine. And men are attracted to a woman who both sees and appreciates their masculinity, and who supports them in increasing their feeling of masculinity. The Asian Geisha’s secret is that she knows that a man’s ego and sense of himself depend in large measure on both his feeling masculine and being seen as such by his woman. The Asian Geisha strokes the man’s ego in many ways, both to sat isfy him at the moment and to encourage him to purchase her business ser vices again in the future. You, the American Geisha, support and stroke your Good Man’s ego by making him feel like “more of a man” whenever you in teract with him. Your physically naked vagina and your proud naked-vagina attitude awaken in him a greater sense of masculinity in contrast to your visually obvious femininity. Of course, your goal is not future business, but future marriage. Or a perpetually hot, loving marriage—perhaps sexually reinvigorated by your newly naked White Tigress vagina—if you have al ready found and married your Good Man.

 

Looking at Your Vagina
You have vibrator, lube, and handheld mirror. And you have shaved your vaginal area naked. Now it’s time to acquaint yourself with your genitals. For the very first session you’ll want bright lights, so that you can use the mirror’s two sides (close-up and extra close-up) to see in magnified detail your vaginal and anal areas, often hidden in that visually inaccessible place down there between your thighs.
Let’s hear again from the Woman Plain: “The slit between her thighs is high, there is no hair on her pubic region, and her emission fluid is abun dant. . . . During intercourse, her emission fluid overflows and her body moves and shakes. She can’t control herself; perspiration flows in all direc tions, and she behaves in accord with the man.”3 As you examine yourself, or just at the thought of examining yourself, your vaginal walls may start to secrete their own lubricant. If you are wet, dip your finger lightly into your vagina, bring the wetness out, and spread it slowly over your vulval lips, the entrance to your vagina, and your clitoris. If you are not wet (enough) natu rally, use a little of the artificial lubricant to make touching and rubbing comfortable, but not so much that you lose the stimulation caused by the friction of your fingers as they caress, glide, stroke, and pinch their way across, around, and into the various parts of that hidden landscape high up between your thighs.
This very first examination, conducted in bright light, is meant to pro vide you with an education, an informed awareness of the beautiful, sexy organs that reside just out of your sight. Use your mirror well, especially the extra-close-up side, and admire the beauty of your vagina.
You may want to prolong this first bright-light viewing (and touching), or repeat it several times, until you have a pretty good idea of what’s down there, how good it can feel, and how beautiful and erotic it is, naked and perhaps somewhat swollen with blood, engorged from your growing sexual excitement. You may not know that each vagina is as different physically as one fin gerprint or one snowflake from another. Let a shiver of passion pass through you as you slowly contemplate, in great detail, the unique vagina that your eyes behold, a gorgeous vagina like no other, ultimately a sexy and beautiful gift for your Good Man.
If you aren’t already in a relationship, know that someday a lucky Good Man will gain access to your vaginal entrance. And he will praise his good fortune to be in such a lovely woman’s beautiful vagina, to have been worthy to be granted entrance into such an intimate, privileged, almost sacred part of you. For now, though, you are just looking and touching, alone, getting familiar with this feminine center of your sexuality.
This book is about attracting, satisfying, and keeping a Good Man; it is not a medical textbook, so I will not detract from our focus on the femi nine and sexual by going into too much anatomical detail, just the basics at this point. Later, in Chapter 5, when we discuss your G-spot (yes, it exists in every woman!) and the phenomenon of female ejaculation (yes, you can be a “shooter”), we’ll get into somewhat more necessary detail.
For now, focus your attention on your outer vulval lips (the labia ma jora), and on the clitoris and its hood, which are one of the centers of your sexual excitement. They are located where the outer vulval lips meet, toward your belly button. Poking out from between the labia majora are the labia minora, your inner vulval lips, the thin, butterfly-like, and very sensitive folds of skin that often swell and fill quite noticeably during sexual stimula tion. Of course, you’ll also want to give proper attention, externally as well as internally, to your vaginal opening. And locate with the tip of your index finger the very important urethral opening (where you pee), located be tween the clitoris and the vaginal opening. Finally, trace lightly toward the rear over the smooth, sensitive skin of the perineum, located back toward the anal opening (between the anus and the vaginal opening).
(Caution:
If you explore inside the anus, be sure to wash your hands and vibrator thor oughly before using either in the vaginal area, in order to avoid introducing even microscopic fecal material from the rectum into the vagina or urethral opening.)
Once you have examined and touched your vaginal area enough to feel fully aware of and comfortable with all of its physical aspects, it is time to begin exploring your vagina’s sexual responses and desires. If looking at your genitals involved some real work in maneuvering the mirror while try ing to get Hollywood-style lighting to fall on your vagina just where you needed it in order to see well, then masturbation will be the play part of your exploration. Perhaps switch to soft lights or semidarkness. Candles? Incense? Sexy lingerie? Position your body on the bed so that it is much more relaxed and natural. Start with just your fingers, using one or both hands to hold, stroke, pinch, tease, separate, and penetrate as your desire leads you. Let yourself respond to your own touch in a natural, uninhibited way. (You are in your own bedroom, aren’t you? Door locked!) Let yourself moan, groan, pant, cry out, scream as your vagina’s and clitoris’s excitement grows, perhaps to orgasm, with your fingers’ movements.

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