Sex and Crime: Oliver's Strange Journey (57 page)

I flipped the fuck out! First I was
speechless. Then I started screaming at them at the top of my
lungs. But they were in a coma-like sleep. Nothing was going to
wake them up right now.

This is the kind of situation where people
get killed. There are dozens of movies, books, and sad country
songs about a guy walking in on his girl, in bed with some other
guy, and going on a shooting rampage, killing them both in the heat
of passion.

For a minute there, I seriously thought
about bashing their heads in with a blunt object. But then I
figured they weren't worth it. I wasn't going to spend the rest of
my life in prison for killing some nigger dope boy and a lowlife
piece of shit whore.

But I had to let my aggression out somehow,
so I kicked the door while storming out of the bedroom. I
destroyyyed that door.

I was beside myself with hatred for
Veronica. I was going to lose my mind. I felt like Veronica
purposely looked for ways to inflict emotional pain on other
people. She was a monster. It was as if she was actually trying as
hard as she could to be the worst person on the planet. Every time
I thought she couldn't stoop any lower, and the things she did to
hurt me couldn't get any worse, she found a new way to hurt me even
more.

On the drive home, I called Veronica's
probation officer and told him that she had been doing drugs the
whole time, and that the only reason she had been passing her
mandatory drug tests was because she hid a little 5 Hour Energy
bottle with someone else's clean pee inside her vagina. He thanked
me for the heads up and told me he would call her in for a drug
test right now.

When Veronica showed up at his office later
that day, he told her that he knew she was hiding a bottle of clean
pee, and that if she used it, she'd be tampering with evidence and
she'd be committing a new felony. Instead of peeing, she ran away.
Usually it takes a week or so for the probation violation paperwork
to go through, but he issued her warrants the very same day.
Veronica was going to be back in jail soon. Karma is a bitch!

"Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the
process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough
into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you."

Friedrich Nietzsche

Later that day, Veronica texted me: "Why did
u do that? I love u! I thought we were going to have a baby
together. Why would u send me back to jail?"

I texted back: "Don't gimme that love
bullshit. U fuck everything that has a pulse. U don't give a fuck
about anyone but yourself. What the fuck did u think was gonna
happen when I find u in bed with some nigger? U r lucky I didn't
kill u, u cunt."

I never call a girl a cunt. I really don't
curse a lot, unless I'm very upset. Unfortunately being very upset
was the new normal, whenever I was around Veronica.

The first time I had told Patty about
Veronica, Patty had made snide remarks: "Oh, you found yourself
another drug addict to replace Alice. Nice. I guess you like to
torture yourself."

"Veronica is different," I defended her.
"She really wants to get clean. When she gets out of jail, she's
going to the Salation Army rehab program. And after that she's
going to live with me, and get her old job back as a medical
insurance biller at her stepdad's doctor's office just down the
street from my apartment."

"No she won't," Patty replied. "I'm a drug
counselor, remember? I've been dealing with these people for years.
They're all the same. They are broken. And you can't fix them.
Their brains don't work like your or my brain. They have criminals
minds. You can never ever trust them. They always lie. They always
try to con you. Even if she gets a job, she'll only use the time
away from you to cheat on you. You will never be happy with her.
Loving a drug addict is like hugging someone who has no arms. They
can never hug you back. And Veronica will never love you back the
way you love her. She can't. She's in love with her drugs."

At the time, I thought Patty was just being
mean, because she was jealous that I'd rather be with Alice or
Veronica, than with her.

But now it was like everything Veronica had
done, since Patty told me that stuff, was an attempt to prove Patty
right. It was a horrible feeling to love Veronica, and never be
able to trust her for even a second. It was a given, that she would
never do the right thing, whenever she was faced with any kind of
decision. I got used to the fact that she would betray me every
chance she got. How sad is it that that was normal to me?

Actually finding Veronica in bed with
someone else, seeing it with my own eyes, really drove it home. I
was wounded to the core when I kicked that bedroom door and stormed
out. I felt like I had reached the lowest point of my life.

In a way, it almost felt like a good thing.
Things could only get better from this point on, I told myself.
Nothing and nobody could ever hurt me worse than this. I had been
to the abyss, and survived. What doesn't kill you makes you
stronger. From now on, I was never going to allow another person to
hurt me like this and get away with it. I promised myself if anyone
hurt me, I would not forgive them, and I would not give them a
second chance to hurt me again. Instead, I would punish them. My
vengeance would be swift and fierce.

All that sounded really impressive in my
head. But then I forgave Veronica anyway. I know, I know, it was
stupid. But the heart wants what the heart wants, as George always
said, whenever I defied all common sense and forgave Veronica yet
again.

We talked on the phone and she cried so
much, it melted my heart.

"Do you still wanna have a baby with me?" I
asked.

"Yes, of course," she cried. "I love
you."

"I love you, too. How about we do what we
planned to do in case you run away from the Salvation Army? You can
come hide at my place until you're pregnant and showing, and then
we hire a lawyer and get you house arrest instead of jail time," I
suggested.

I picked her up at her apartment a little
while later. She packed her clothes and grabbed her little
chihuahua, Venus. Veronica had named her dog after the goddess of
love, because she had a heart-shaped spot on her forehead.

On our way to my apartment, Veronica asked
me to stop at Warren's house, to get drugs. She disappeared in
there for about half an hour. I was really uncomfortable, and when
she got out, I asked her if she had sex with him. "No, of course
not! I don't have sex with Warren," she replied with an indignant
tone of voice, as if I had just accused her of the craziest thing
ever. For my sanity's sake, I chose to believe her. But a few weeks
later, Anita told me that Veronica had sex with Warren all the
time.

When we got home, Veronica shot up some Ds
and smoked crack. Then we made love.

The next morning, Veronica's phone was
ringing off the hook. It was her mother Rachel: "Where the hell is
Venus? I want Venus back right now!"

Venus was Veronica's chihuahua, but because
she spent so much time in jail over the past 2 years, her mother
had been taking care of the dog. A week or two after Veronica got
out of jail, and she and Rachel hung out together at her new
apartment on Brantley Road, her mother gave her the dog back. But
now that Veronica had a warrant, and she was about to go back to
jail, Rachel wanted Venus back.

Veronica told some of her so-called friends,
that she was hiding in Port Charlotte. She told her mother the same
story. She didn't want anyone to know she was staying with me, so
the police wouldn't find her here. But at the same time she was
taking pictures of me cuddling with Venus on my couch, and texted
them to her mother, to show her that Venus was ok. She was too high
to realize that she was giving away her location.

Then Rachel called me and asked: "Do you
know where Venus is? I don't care where Veronica is. I don't give a
shit if she is with you or anyone else. She can go fuck a truckload
of Haitians for all I care. I just want Venus back!"

I pretended not to know: "I have no idea
where that stupid dog is. I found Veronica in bed with some guy,
and I haven't talked to her since. I want nothing to do with her
anymore. She's dead to me. The last I heard was that she's hiding
in Port Charlotte somewhere."

Of course Rachel knew I was lying, because
Veronica had just texted her pictures of me and Venus five minutes
ago. But I didn't know that yet.

Rachel continued to call Veronica's phone.
They kept arguing. Veronica told Rachel she would meet her at
Starbucks at the Coconut Point Mall, and give her the dog.

Then Veronica hung up and told me: "Venus is
my dog! I have all the vet papers to prove she's my dog! I don't
want to give her back. My mother is a crazy drunk. Venus is so much
better off here with you and me."

"Well, if she's your dog, then don't give
her back," I said. "You don't have to give her back, if you don't
want to."

"I have to. My mom is psycho. She's not
gonna stop. She's gonna keep causing problems for me. She's gonna
make my life miserable, until I give her Venus," Veronica
replied.

"It's up to you, sweetie. Whatever you want
to do," I said.

She called her mother back and told her she
would meet her at Starbucks with Venus. Then she changed her mind
again. Then she smoked some crack. Then she argued with her mother
again. This went on for hours.

Then she finally told me to call her mother
and tell her that I would meet her at the McDonald's on 41 near San
Carlos Park.

"If I call her and say that, your mom will
know you're staying with me," I said.

"Well, I've been sending her pictures of you
and Venus all day long," Veronica replied.

"What?!? Now she knows you're here and not
in Port Charlotte. Why would you do that?"

"I don't know. I wasn't really thinking
about it. I just wanted to send her some pictures to show her that
Venus is ok."

"Geez! Great. Now she's probably gonna call
the cops on you."

"Nah, my mom is crazy, but she's not gonna
do that."

I called Rachel and said: "When I was
staying at Veronica's place, I brought my Xbox. I left it there. I
told her I want it back. She said that she'll give me my Xbox back,
if I do her a favor and meet up with you and give you Venus. I just
met up with Veronica, and she gave me the dog. So now I have Venus.
Do you want me to meet you at the McDonald's in San Carlos?"

Rachel was startled. This did not go as she
had planned. Then she said: "You want to meet me alone? Without
Veronica? Uhhm... no... I don't trust you... I don't want the dog
from you... I want Veronica to bring me the dog."

I hung up and told Veronica that I had a bad
feeling about this. My instincts told me that Rachel was setting a
trap for Veronica. She was probably going to have the police
waiting at that McDonald's. I told her again that we should just
keep the dog. Screw her mom.

A few minutes later, Rachel called me back:
"Ok, fine, I'll meet you at McDonald's."

Veronica said good bye to Venus and handed
her to me. I told Veronica to lock the door behind me, just to be
safe. I got into the car and Veronica waved good bye. Venus stared
at her through the car window and barked. I felt so bad, because I
knew Veronica really loved that little dog. And I had gotten
attached to her, too. Venus was shy at first, but then she warmed
up to me and was all over me, cuddling with me and kissing my face.
She was an awesome little dog.

As soon as I pulled out of the gate of my
community, there was already a police cruiser behind me. I got
nervous. Was this just a coincidence, or had this cop been waiting
for me inside of the community?

As soon as I passed the gate, I made a left
turn. The cruiser followed me and turned on his flashing lights. I
pulled over. The cop got out of his car and walked up to my window.
"Where's the female?" he demanded to know.

I was shocked. Of course I knew he meant
Veronica, but I tried to play stupid and slowly pointed at the
female dog sitting next to me. "You mean her?"

"Don't bullshit me. You know who I'm talking
about. If you don't tell me right now where she is, I'll arrest you
for aiding and abetting a fugitive," the cop said.

Oh my God, I'm going to jail, I thought.
It's finally gonna happen! After driving to trap houses a hundred
times, I'm gonna end up getting arrested right in front of my own
house. I was scared. "She's in my house," I said quietly. I tried
to look calm, like I didn't have a care in the world, but my heart
was pounding.

By now three other police cruisers had
pulled up behind us. This was turning into a major production. I
felt like I was gonna be on the evening news, in handcuffs.

"Give me your cell phone and the car keys,"
the cop demanded. Then he talked to the other cops. They took my
keys and drove back into the community to arrest Veronica, while he
waited with me.

He asked me if there are any weapons in my
apartment. I told him about my gun, but I stressed the fact that
Veronica didn't know that I had one, or where it was. He warned the
other cops that she may be armed and dangerous. I told him again
that she didn't know about the gun. I was sweating bullets, because
when a felon lives in a house with a gun, she is technically in
possession of the gun. That's another felony right there. And they
could have charged me with a felony for giving a gun to a
felon.