Sex and Crime: Oliver's Strange Journey (69 page)

While I ran to Publix, to get some milk and
bread, Nicole texted me: "Lucy just told me that she wants to be in
a real relationship with you. She really has feelings for you."
Nicole was getting irritated by how affectionate Lucy was acting
towards me.

When I got back to the house, we had
breakfast. Then they both called detox, because they had both
promised me they would go to rehab. They planned on going together.
Finally they were ready to get some sleep. It was about time. I
hadn't slept all night, and I was dead tired. Unlike them, I didn't
have any crack to keep me awake for days.

But instead of going to sleep, Lucy suddenly
told me that she had run out of drugs, and now she wanted me to
drive her all the way to the Howard Johnson, to get some more. Then
Nicole said she wanted to pick up the rest of her clothes at the
Knights Inn in North Fort Myers. This was gonna turn into one of
those days again, where we drive around aimlessly for hours. I
really couldn't deal with that right now. I was way too tired. But
I drove them anyway.

Finally we were on the way back to my house,
and we were gonna get some sleep. But now Lucy wanted to smoke her
crack and shoot up before going to bed. Then she told me she wanted
to have sex. I didn't know how to respond to that. On one hand I
really wanted to have sex with her, but on the other hand I didn't
want to hurt Nicole by sleeping with Lucy while they're both at my
house.

Nicole was in the guest room, while Lucy and
I were in my bedroom. I was in bed, and Lucy was standing by the
sink in the bathroom that connects to my bedroom, doing drugs.

It must have driven Nicole crazy, that Lucy
and I were in the bedroom together, with the door locked. I really
felt bad.

Then Nicole texted Lucy, that she wanted me
to drop her off at Lucy's grandfather's house.

Lucy said Nicole was lying. She really
wanted to go on a Backpage date with some guy. I was really pissed.
I texted Nicole: "I can't believe you're gonna go fuck someone
else!"

Nicole yelled through the house: "What are
you talking about? I'm not going on any calls! It's Lucy's call.
It's her ad. She wanted me to do the call for her and give her part
of the money, but I don't want to. So then Lucy said she's gonna do
the call."

I looked at Lucy and said: "What the fuck?
You're gonna go fuck someone else? Lovely. Just grab your stuff,
and I'll drive you to your fucking call. I'm so done with you."

She got upset that things between us were
falling apart again already and screamed at Nicole: "THANKS A
FUCKING LOT FOR RUINING EVERYTHING! Now I have to LEAVE again
because of YOU!"

They were screaming at each other for a few
minutes. Then Lucy came back in the bedroom and locked the door.
She told me again that the reason why Nicole wanted me to drive her
to North Fort Myers was to go do a Backpage date. Lucy told me to
ignore Nicole: "If we lock the door, and pretend to be sleeping,
she'll call someone else for a ride eventually."

Now that I knew Nicole was about to go fuck
someone else, I figured I might as well have sex with Lucy. Why
not?

Lucy stood in front of the bathroom sink
naked. I was lying on the bed, rubbing my dick, watching her
beautiful breasts while she smoked crack. I was probably gonna end
up having to masturbate for an hour again, because she just
couldn't stop smoking crack. I was getting really frustrated. She
saw how hard I was, so she came out of the bathroom, gently grabbed
my dick and sucked the head for a little while, to tease me. Then
she smiled her little mischievous smile and went back in the
bathroom to smoke more crack.

Nicole wouldn't stop calling our names. She
wanted to go to North Fort Myers as soon as possible. She kept
texting Lucy that she wanted to leave, and texted me: "Really?" As
if to say: "I can't believe you're fucking her!"

That made me feel really guilty. I got
dressed.

"What are you doing?" Lucy asked. She hadn't
slept in days, and it was finally catching up with her. Her speech
was slurred, and her eyes were rolling in the back of her head.

"Nicole isn't gonna stop, so why don't you
get some sleep, and I'll drop her off at your grandpa's house. I'll
be back as soon as possible."

"No! I don't want you to drive anywhere
alone with her. I want to come with you," Lucy replied. She was
probably afraid I'd have sex with Nicole.

I told her that she really needed some
sleep, and that I was afraid if she'd take a ride, she'd just end
up disappearing in some dope boy's dirty motel room again, and then
I'd end up driving home without her.

"No," Lucy promised, "I won't do that. I'll
just take a ride and after we drop Nicole off, we'll finally make
love and get some sleep."

On the way to North Fort Myers, our
destination suddenly changed. They were both frantically texting.
Then Nicole said she wanted me to drop her off at the Knights Inn.
So obviously Lucy had told me the truth about Nicole going to do a
call instead of going to her grandpa's house.

Meanwhile they were both answering their
phones with their hooker names. Later I found out that both had
posted fresh escort ads on Backpage that morning. Now they were
both going to do calls.

They answered their phones right in front of
me, talking to guys about fucking them, and how much it costs for
half an hour or an hour, and that they do full service. They told
guys they were available for doubles.

They didn't even realize I was there. Their
mind was on their next fix, and what they would have to do to get
it. It did not register in their brains at all, how upsetting it
was to me to listen to them make plans to fuck other guys. The part
of their brains that felt empathy was turned off.

"You two are like braindead zombies," I said
angrily.

They didn't care. They were busy making
plans. Nothing else mattered.

When we arrived at the Knights Inn, Nicole
got out of the car without saying good bye or thank you. She knew I
was going to Germany the day after tomorrow, and she wouldn't see
me again for a while, but none of that mattered right now. She had
drugs on her mind. She disappeared in some dope boy's room. For a
fee, he was letting girls like Lucy and Nicole use the room to have
sex with guys, and he gave them drugs and took all their money. It
was heartbreaking to watch Nicole walk off into that room.

Then Lucy said, "I just gotta grab something
out of the room."

"What?" I asked.

"Hold on, I'll be right back," she said and
jumped out of the car to follow Nicole.

"You're not coming back, are you?" I
asked.

"Of course I am! It'll only take a minute.
I'll be right back! Don't leave without me," Lucy said.

I waited 10 minutes. Then I texted Lucy: "Ur
not gonna come out, r u?"

"No," was all she texted back.

I fucking knew it. I was so sick of this
shit. I had enough. At first Lucy had seemed so different from
Veronica, but then she turned out to be just like her. And Nicole
seemed so different from girls like Veronica and Lucy, but then she
became just like them, as her addiction got worse.

I decided that my upcoming trip to Germany,
to spend Christmas with my parents, was going to be the end of my
adventures in Fort Myers' underworld. Getting on the plane would be
like me riding into the sunset, while the words THE END slowly
scroll across the screen.

And it was perfect timing. It was the end of
2013, so my New Year's resolution for 2014 would be: NO MO HO! No
more whores.

As I slowly drove out of the parking lot at
the Knights Inn, I texted Nicole: "I'm sorry, but I can't be with a
girl who tricks on Backpage. I can't handle when a girl I care
about has sex with other people."

A week later, on Christmas morning, while I
was in Germany, I thought of Lucy and Nicole. I checked Backpage.
And there they were, posing semi-nude in a whole bunch of their
escort ads, day after day, offering to have sex with any random
stranger.

I messaged Nicole on Facebook: "Remember our
conversation in the car a few weeks ago, when I told you, you
wouldn't just fuck guys for a day or two to pay bills, but soon you
would be doing it all day every day, and it would become your new
life? See, I was right. It always starts like that. And are you
happy with your life now? Are you happy living like this? Are you
proud of yourself? I know you're not, sweetie. This isn't really
you. Please stop. You're slowly killing yourself with this shit.
And you're killing me, because I care about you, and I can't stand
the thought of you doing this. You told me you are not the kind of
girl who sleeps around. But now you spent Christmas Eve and
Christmas morning letting pervs fuck you and sucking their dick.
Did you ever think it would come to this?"

A week earlier, when I had dropped them off
at the Knights Inn that day right before I flew to Germany, I had
also texted Lucy, after she followed Nicole into the motel room and
disappeared: "I can't believe u did this to me again. I hope ur
proud of urself. It breaks my heart to see u like this. Good luck
with everything. Have a nice life."

The next morning, while I was packing my
bags for the trip, George called: "So what happened last night? Did
you have a threesome with Lucy and Nicole?"

"No, actually I didn't have sex with either
one of them," I replied.

He thought that was hilarious: "You had two
beautiful girls spend the night at your house, you love both of
them, and they both love you, and you didn't have sex with either
one? You FAILED! I'm gonna have to revoke your man card."

"We were up all night, because they were
doing drugs. And the next day they ditched me at the Knights Inn.
It hurt so bad to see them walk into that motel room," I said.

In the afternoon, I got a text from Lucy:
"I'm so sorry. I can't believe I did that to u. I don't even know
what to say. Just... I'M SO SORRY."

I knew that whenever she had a lucid moment,
she really did feel terrible about all the things she had done to
me and other people. That's why she couldn't bear to be sober for
even a minute. Her head was filled with painful thoughts and
traumatic memories. The only way she could get through a day was by
completely numbing her emotions with drugs, so she didn't have to
think about anything.

Have you ever seen The Notebook? It's a
movie about these two old people in a nursing home. A man reads an
old lady a story from a handwritten notebook. It's a love story
about a young couple. The old lady seems to remember the story, but
isn't sure. It turns out she has Alzheimer's, and she was the one
who wrote the story of how she and the old man had met. Her disease
had progressed to the point where she didn't remember their life
together, or even who he was. He was a complete stranger to her
now. But every night, when he finished the story, she remembered
him for a few minutes. For a few minutes each night, she came back
to him, and she remembered how much she loved him. And then the fog
took her away again.

That's how I feel about Lucy and Nicole. I
love them. They're sweet, beautiful, lovable girls, who deserve all
the love, kindness and affection in the world. And sometimes, for
just a few minutes, they remember who they used to be. But then the
drugs cloud their minds, and the fog takes them away again. I
really hope they'll go to rehab.

"Being a nice guy doesn't mean you are a push over.
It also doesn't mean you are easy to manipulate or take advantage
of. No, being a nice guy simply means you care, have no time to get
mad at the small stuff, and you think of the world in larger terms
than self. And despite living in the shadow of the bad guys and
paying for mistakes you didn't make, you hold on sometimes more
than you should, but when you can no longer, you move on because
it's the right thing to do."

Eugene Nathaniel Butler

"Letting go doesn't mean that you don't care about
someone anymore. It's just realizing that the only person you
really have control over is yourself."

Deborah Reber

"Some people believe holding on and hanging in there
are signs of great strength. However, there are times when it takes
much more strength to know when to let go and then do it."

Ann Landers

"The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive
yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that
the situation is over, you cannot move forward."

Steve Maraboli

"Pain will leave you, when you let go."

Jeremy Aldana

"The beautiful journey of today can only begin when
we learn to let go of yesterday."

Steve Maraboli

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Sex and
Crime
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Oliver