Never to Keep (Accepting Fate #1) (26 page)

Relief surged through me when the responsibility for answering her question was suddenly lifted from my shoulders. “I am,” Sawyer answered for me.

I was befuddled when angry tears sprung from Peyton’s eyes. “No! You can’t be that baby’s daddy.” She glared at Sawyer while pointing at my stomach. “I want you to be
my
new daddy. I want you to marry my mommy when she comes home!” Peyton stomped her little feet as she stormed off, the wake of her tantrum trailing behind her.

Peyton had never been truly angry with me before, and I had no idea how to fix it. “I’ll talk to her,” Sawyer said. He kissed my forehead and jogged up the stairs after my little girl.

I followed behind them a minute later and stood outside the partially open door, watching as Peyton lay in her bed with the covers pulled up over her head. Her bellowing cries had diminished to sobs. “Do you want to talk?” Sawyer asked in a soothing tone. She tugged the blanket down to just below her eyes so she could see him.

“Why don’t you want to be my daddy?” Her voice shook as she spoke. My heart broke for her all over again.

“It’s not that I don’t want to be your daddy. I just don’t love your mother. I barely even know her. Your mommy said she doesn’t want to marry me, either, remember?”

“Do you love Mama?” I held my breath and waited for his response.

“I care about her, and I care about you.”

Madison

I tiptoed downstairs so they wouldn’t know I had eavesdropped on their conversation. When Sawyer came down alone a few minutes later, I wrapped my arms tightly around his neck and firmly pressed my lips to his.

“What was that for? Not that I’m complaining, of course.” The way his face lit up nearly made me swoon, and I was
not
the kind of girl who swooned.

“You’re so good with her. Is she coming down?”

“I think she needs a little time to process.” He wove his fingers through mine and led me to the recliner in the living room. He sat down and pulled me onto his lap. “I guess we don’t have to hide our relationship from her.”

“True, but we need to behave when she’s around.”

“I missed you so much. I can’t tell you how many times my sister had to physically restrain me to keep me from coming over here. Seeing Peyton at school every day was the only thing that stopped me from ending up in a mental institution.”

“Is your sister home alone right now?”

“Yeah. Don’t worry about it, though. She understands. Hell, she practically shoved me out of the house when I told her how I felt.”

“I really like her.” Even more now that I knew she wasn’t sleeping with him. “You should invite her over for dinner.”

He sent her a text, and she responded quickly.

“She said she doesn’t want to intrude.”

“There won’t be anything to intrude on until Peyton goes to sleep tonight.” I ran my fingers over the dark stubble on his cheeks.

“Don’t remind me. I think my balls are going to explode.” He shifted my position on his lap.

“They seemed to get along really well earlier. Maybe they can hang out together while I take care of your problem.” I dragged my fingers slowly down his chest until I ran into his belt buckle.

He grabbed his phone so fast I almost missed it. “Get over here, now.” He ended the call and tossed the phone on the small table next to the chair.

“I want to see if I can guess who she is. I don’t pay much attention to the Hollywood scene, but Olivia has dragged me to enough movies over the years that I might be able to get it.”

We let our lips get properly reacquainted while we waited for our guest to arrive. I tried to stand up to get the door, but a pair of strong arms kept me in place. “Come in!” Sawyer shouted loud enough for his sister to hear.

“Hey, bro.” She stepped inside and scanned the area until her eyes landed on us. “Looks as though everything turned out well.”

Sawyer nuzzled the crook of my neck and inhaled deeply. “Better than I could have imagined.”

“Where’s short stuff?” Her eyes darted around the room again.

Sawyer explained Peyton’s fall out while I studied his sister’s face. I made mental adjustments based on the changes he’d told me about earlier.

“You’re Marina Alexander,” I blurted before Sawyer finished his story.

“I am indeed. Apparently my disguise doesn’t fool
everyone
.” Sawyer cringed at her jab. “How’d you figure it out?” she asked.

“I was a huge fan when you played college basketball.”

“Impressive. I only played for one season, and that was years ago.”

“It also helped that I was actively trying to figure it out,” I admitted. “Peyton’s mother, Olivia, absolutely adores you. She could never get my brother to see your movies with her, so she made me go instead.” My turn to cringe. “Sorry, that didn’t come out right.”

“No worries. There are a lot of my movies I wouldn’t voluntarily go see. In the early days, Tate and I pretty much took whatever we could get.”

“Is Tate here, too?” I wasn’t ashamed to admit that thoughts of Tate Parker had a tendency to dampen my panties.

“No, he had to film a few commercials in Canada, and then went camping with his dad and brothers for a few weeks. Whenever we’re spotted apart, the media has a field day with breakup stories. It was easier for me to come here and lay low until Tate comes home.”

“I don’t know how you deal with the constant scrutiny. I would go insane,” I said.

“We’ve learned to compartmentalize over the years. It’s not always bad—gave me an excuse to come spend time with you guys.”

“You never need an excuse for that,” Sawyer told his sister.

“I know. It’s just really hard to get away sometimes.” Marina turned her eyes back to me. “I’m so glad the two of you worked things out. My life has become a real sausage fest between Sawyer, Tate, and all of their various brothers. I was practically drowning in testosterone. Juli, my publicist, is pretty much the only female friend I have.”

“I know the feeling. Peyton’s mom is my only close girlfriend,” I said.

“Speaking of Peyton, do you think she’s had enough time to calm down?” Marina asked. “I’m really looking forward to getting to know her—and spoiling the shit out of her.”

“I’ll go check.” I headed over to the foot of the stairs and called up to her. “Peyton, we have company!” Her usually rapid footfalls on the steps were replaced by a much slower rhythm. I waited at the bottom of the stairs until she was at eye level. I pulled her into my arms when she reached the third step from the bottom.

“I’m sorry, baby. I didn’t mean to upset you.” I failed to keep the emotion from echoing in my voice.

Relief and joy flowed through me when her little arms squeezed tightly around my neck. “I’m sorry, Mama. Please, don’t hate me.”

“I could never hate you, Peyton. I love you more than anything in the entire world. Don’t ever forget that.”

Her curls bounced when she nodded. “Who’s here?”

I spun around and set her down on the floor. “Go to the living room and see for yourself.”

*

Peyton and Marina got along as if they’d known each other forever. After dinner, they fell into a trance while watching a basketball game on TV. I left my spot on the loveseat and made my way over to the recliner, where Sawyer was camped out. I leaned close to Sawyer’s ear, making sure my breasts brushed against him on my way down. “Ready for some help?” I whispered.

Sawyer caught on pretty quick. “Didn’t you say you needed help moving some furniture upstairs?” His voice was unnaturally loud.

“I’d completely forgotten. Marina, would you mind watching Pey while we move my bedroom furniture around?”

“No problem. Take as much time as you need.” She gave me a knowing wink as Sawyer and I made a mad dash for the stairs.

I was on my knees and had his pants down in record time. I looked at the door once more to make sure the lock was securely in place before returning my attention to the massive display of masculinity in front of me.
It’s even better than I remembered.
Come to think of it, I’d never had an up close and personal view before. I licked my lips and lunged forward, only to have my progress stopped by a hand on my forehead.

“Don’t. I want to come inside of you.”

“That’s fine. I’ll just give you a head start, since I’m already down here.” I licked my lips. He didn’t budge when I tried to pull his hand away from my head. I reached out to grab his erection, only to find it had softened ever so slightly.

“What’s wrong?” Surely he hadn’t changed his mind about wanting me that quickly.

“I don’t want you to do that to me.”

I sat back on my heels. “Why not? I thought all men loved oral.”

He tugged his pants up. “You’re the mother of my child. I don’t want you on your knees.” He sighed and shoved his hands through his hair. He paused for an uncomfortable beat. “When was the last time you were with Charlie?”

“What are you talking about?”

“I saw you kiss him at the grocery store a few weeks ago.”

“Oh, the day we got the girls a watermelon?” He nodded. “He said there was an ex he needed to make jealous. I assumed it was one of his exes, so I played along. We’re just friends.”

“So, you never slept with him?”

“No. I’ve been intimate with only two men in my life, including you.” I didn’t have to tell him who the other guy was. I suddenly regretted every single night I’d spent with Ethan. “I haven’t been with anyone else since a couple of months before the closet.” The change in his posture reminded me of ice melting into a puddle. As soon as his defenses were down, it was time to go in for the kill.

“I want full access to your body to be able to do anything I want whenever I want. I can’t wait to show you what I can do with my tongue.” His back stiffened ever so slightly. “There are other ways to do it than with me on my knees, you know.”

He nodded his agreement. “Only if I get full access to you.”

“You’ve had it since day one.” I leaned over and kissed his rough cheek.

He was still for a moment and then turned to me. “I want a piece of you no one else has ever had; something that is just mine.” He pulled me over to straddle his lap. His large finger ran down my spine and rested near my rear entrance. “How about this?”

I shook my head. “I’m sorry.”

“Is there anything left?”

“You’re the first man to put a baby in me.” I was a little embarrassed to tell him the rest, but I knew he needed to hear it. “You were also the first guy to make me come.”

“How is that possible?”

“Ethan and I weren’t together that many times. I was only sixteen when he left for college, and after that we didn’t see each other in person very often.”

“How many times did he fuck you?”

“I didn’t keep track.”

“Take a guess.”

“I don’t know, maybe thirty or forty times.”

“So, the first night at the hotel … that was, what, five times?” He held up one hand with his fingers splayed. “Six, seven, eight…” He methodically raised fingers on his other hand as he quietly counted. “Should I count the time you don’t remember?”

“I’ll leave that up to you,” I said. I wasn’t sure if I should be offended or amused by his behavior.

“I’m going to have to fuck you at least four or five times a day for the next week to get in the lead.”

“I think we need to go back downstairs.”

“You’re probably right. We have been up here a while,” he conceded. I hoped the baby didn’t inherit his pouty lip; I wouldn’t stand a chance.

“All right, all right. You can come once, and then we’ll go downstairs.” I tried to push him back onto the bed only to end up on my feet. He bent me over the side of the bed and pulled his pants down once more.

“I thought I was going to get full access?”

“I told you I want to come inside you. I need it. It’s been too long.” Plus, apparently he needed to up his tally. He yanked down my yoga pants and panties in one smooth motion. He growled in appreciation. “This is going to be fast.” He pushed inside of me slowly and then picked up the pace. “Damn, I think you’ve gotten even tighter,” he rasped.

“Less talking, more fucking,” I ordered.

“Yes, ma’am.”

Madison

“Sweetie, I think you should let your little sister take a turn at quarterback.” Sawyer’s muscular body was false advertising; the boy couldn’t complete a pass to save his life.

“Give me a few minutes. I’m still getting warmed up.”

“Peyton has picked you off three times already. I hate to tell you this, but you kind of suck,” I laughed. “Maybe you’d have better luck playing receiver.”

Sawyer came over and wrapped me up in his strong, useless arms. “At least there are some things I’m good at,” he whispered in my ear.

“Thank goodness for that,” I replied and gave him a quick peck on the lips. I raised my voice so the others could hear, “Now get your sorry ass over there and throw the ball like a man.”

“Yeah, Sawyer, I’m bored,” Marina piped in as he approached her. “I run my routes perfectly, yet the ball never comes anywhere near me. I would say you throw like a little girl, but I don’t want to offend Peyton—or any other little girl, for that matter.”