Never Let Go (24 page)

I notice a ripple in the crowd coming toward me. When I look, I see Spencer squeezing his way through. Everybody wants congratulate him. He indulges a few of his new fans, smiling apologetically at me as he does it. I laugh and wave, motioning for him to take his time.

Eventually, Spencer nears me. It’s about the same time that Charlie retakes the stage. The excitement in the room has subsided a bit. Charlie starts speaking into the mic. His words are lost on me as I am consumed by the magnificent man reaching my side.

I jump and throw my arms around his neck as soon as he’s close enough. Spencer’s hands go on my waist, and he spins us around. As Charlie invites the performers back on stage, Spencer whispers in my ear, “You want to get out of here?”

I nod eagerly. He takes my hand and leads me out. His fingers feel warm and strong wrapped around my palm.

Spencer opens the doors into the night. We step into the cool air, leaving the noise of the café behind us.

I have so many things I want to say. How sorry I am for getting him wrong this whole time. How amazed I am at his sublime talent.

And, most of all, how close he is to stealing my heart.

Chapter Twenty-Two

“You’re awfully quiet,” Spencer notes as we walk down the street, swinging my hand. “What’s up?”

What’s up?
Only that I had the most soul-rending performance I’ve ever witness dedicated to me by a near perfect specimen of masculine sexiness, that’s what.

No big deal, Paige.

“Spencer, that was…” I trail off, shaking my head. “I can’t even think of the right word. Amazing. Astounding.
Perfect
.”

He turns to me with a slanted smile. “I take it you liked it?”

“Liked it? It was more than that! You were magnificent up there. When you started playing that first song, I thought I’d sent you to your grave. I would have died of embarrassment if I could only play something as weak as that. But that was all part of your plan, wasn’t it? You sly devil. You had me worried!”

Spencer laughs it off. “Nah. I didn’t want you worried. I was just going for a bit of surprise.”

“Well, you fooled me.” I grin. “And what’s up with all the false modesty, Spencer? You know you’re great. Why pretend you’re not?”

“You’re giving me too much credit, Paige.” He sounds very thoughtful as he directs us to a wooden bench under the glow of a streetlamp. “It was only a song.”

“No, Spencer. What you did was amazing. You held nothing back. I would have never thought you had it in you.”

“I guess we all have our little surprises, huh?”

“Or plain, God-given talent,” I say. “And the way the crowd reacted when Charlie announced your name. They knew you from before.”

He shrugs. “Some of them probably just recognized my name.” He turns to me and flashes a little smile. “I remember what you said about my
reputation
.”

I shake my head. “It wasn’t that. They knew you from the café. You said you stopped playing. Why?”

Spencer exhales and stretches his arms out. “That’s a long story. The short of it is, that’s not my scene anymore.”

“But,
why
?” I ask. “You’re so good. Remember what Charlie said about the first girl who went up? All of that applies to you, but like, ten-fold.”

Spencer shakes his head. “You’re very flattering tonight. What happened to the girl who couldn’t look at me without grimacing?”

I stick my tongue out at him. “She’s still here,” I joke, “if that’s what you prefer.”

Spencer laughs. “No, no. I like this version of you much better.” He puts an arm around my shoulder. “Let’s just not get carried away, hmm? Tonight was basically… a one-off thing.”

I push away and look him in the eyes. “How can you say that?” I demand. “You have this great gift. To deny it from the world—”

“What if I don’t want to share it?” Spencer snaps. “What if I want to keep it hidden? What if just
don’t want to play
?”

I shy back, startled at the outburst. “I didn’t know it was such a hot button topic for you.”

Spencer sighs. He turns to face me again. “No. It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have gotten angry.” He reaches out to take my hands and holds them between us. His fingers run over my knuckles as he talks. “I’m sorry. You just—you don’t know anything about me, but still, somehow, against all logic, you see the good in me. And I don’t think I deserve it. Not from you.”

His face is pained when he looks up at me. “I want you to know my story. But I’m afraid it will scare you away.” His fingers tighten around mine. “And I’m a greedy bastard. I want to keep you close to me for as long as I can.”

My hearts swells in my chest. I think I am about as close as I can get to falling in love in one night.

“There’s nothing you have to hide from me, Spencer. I have secrets, too.” It feels strangely liberating to say the words. “I won’t push you to reveal anything you don’t want. I know first-hand how delicate trust can be. How much courage it takes to trust another person.”
How much courage it takes to love another person
. “We’ve had our share of bumps on the road, you and I, but I think we’re getting there.”

Spencer looks at me without answering. A comfortable silence settles between us.

When I first arrived on campus, I thought a moment like this would only be possible with Andrew. And only months after we’d passed our self-imposed relationship embargo.

Maybe I never had real chemistry with Andrew. Maybe that’s why, in the span of a week, I’ve gone from being disgusted around Spencer to feeling completely at ease around him.

Maybe
this
is true chemistry.

“You are too precious,” Spencer whispers softly. “I don’t deserve you so close to me.”

I turn to look at him. I’m captivated by the way the light reflects off his stunning gray pupils, framed by those long, dark lashes. “This is where I want to be,” I breathe.

A small, secretive, seductive smile forms on his lips. He leans toward me.

My lips part in anticipation and I close my eyes.

His lips touch mine. It’s like a brush of silk against my skin. Soft and gentle. Light and sweet. Cool like the crispness of the night, yet warm like a cottony dream.

It lasts only a fraction of a second. Spencer pulls back, smiling. I sigh, relishing the remnants of his taste.

He takes my hand. “Can I walk you home?”

“Yes,” I smile. “I’d like that.”

There is something wonderful in the air tonight. Spencer told me before that he wants to show me his world.

I think this is it.

It is not the world I expected. It has nothing to do with his on-campus persona, his tattoos, or his bike.

It’s deeper and more substantial than that. Tonight, Spencer showed me a side of himself that he keeps carefully hidden. It’s layered far beneath the cocoon of indifference he displays to the outside world.

I spoke earlier of trust. I meant what I said. I really think that he and I are getting there. I trust Spencer more than any other person I know, except maybe Katy. And he trusts me enough to show me who he really is, without pretense or insincerity.

That means everything to me.

“Can I ask you something?” I say as we stroll arm-in-arm down the street.

“Of course.”

“It’s kind of personal. You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.”

“Uh oh.” Spencer eyes me warily. “I have a feeling this is one of those tests you girls love so much.”

“No test, I promise,” I assure him. “And I won’t freak out based on what you tell me, either.”

“Now you’re making me apprehensive,” he jokes. “But I’m curious what you want to know. Shoot.”

“Okay.” I gaze up at him. “I’m just trying to understand you better.” I take a deep breath. “Here goes: Have you ever been in love?”

“Oh.” Spencer looks away, and we walk a few steps together without him answering. Then he sighs and says, “Yes. Only once. A long time ago.”

I don’t want to delve too deeply into his past, but I have to know this. “How long?”

“When I was eighteen.”

We walk quietly for few moments. He’s been honest with me. I decide I should be honest with him, too.

“I’ve never been in love,” I say.

He smiles down at me. “Not even a high school crush?”

“I went to an all-girls boarding school.”

“Huh.” Spencer doesn’t seem surprised. More peaceful minutes pass. Then, out of the blue, he says, “Tell me, why this sudden interest in matters of the heart?”

I’m glad it’s dark so he can’t see my blush.
Like he doesn’t know.

Spencer saves me from having to answer. “I’m teasing,” he says softly. “But for what it’s worth, my mind’s been on the subject too.” He smiles.

I lean my head against his arm, feeling all sorts of contentment. We pass frat row, and the sounds of the ongoing party liven the night.

I look at Spencer. “Are you going there tonight?”

He laughs. “What for? I have everything I need right here.”

I smile, elevated by his sweet words. If he had said something like that before tonight, before the café performance, I would have chalked it up to more disingenuous bullshit. But now? Well, things are different.

We have the sidewalk to ourselves the whole way back. We keep conversation light and pleasant, speaking of whatever trivialities come to mind. When we reach the corner turning to the dorms, I spot another couple ahead. They’re laughing and giggling in each other’s arms.

I don’t pay any mind to them until Katy’s familiar laughter rings through the air.

My ears perk up. Spencer notices, and shifts his grip on my arm.

“That’s Katy,” I tell him, just in case he doesn’t recognize her voice. I stop. “Let’s give them some space. She’s been quiet about her counseling sessions. I think she’s been hooking up with her therapist.”

Spencer chuckles. “Sounds like something I might try.”

I hit his arm. “Spencer!”

He laughs and gives a cheeky grin. “In the past,” he amends.

“Well, past or not, Katy is doing it now.”

I see a playful glimmer in Spencer’s eye. “Want to see who it is?”

I think about it… and nod.

“Okay.” Spencer lowers his voice conspiratorially. “We’re going to have to be quiet. Like shadows.”

“Like shadows,” I agree.

“The first thing to do is get off this fucking sidewalk, so if they turn back, they won’t see us!”

I squeal as Spencer grabs my waist and pulls me to the side of the nearest building.

“Now what?” I whisper, barely able to keep the laughter from my voice.

“Stay low,” Spencer advises. He puts a finger on my lips. “And stay quiet.”

I nod and make that old playground motion of sealing my lips shut.

We sneak to the corner of the building. Spencer peeks around to the other side, then turns back. “They’re on the front porch.”

I step forward to take a look, but Spencer stops me with an outstretched arm. “Careful,” he warns.

“Can you see who’s with her?”

Spencer shakes his head. “No. We’re too far away.”

“I want to try!”

“No. You’ll give us away.”

I fix him with a pout. “Then what do you propose we do, Spencer?”

“Wait for them to go inside, rush the stairs, and pretend it’s a big accident when we run into them.”

I hit his arm. “And that won’t give us away?”

He grins at me. “It’s different.”

“Fine,” I say. “Are they in yet?”

Spencer checks around the corner. He turns back to me. “Yeah. They just went through the doors. Ready? We’ll have to be quick.”

“Wait,” I say, holding him back. I don’t know if this is such a good idea. I mean, I know it’s just for fun, but how would I like it if Katy ambushed me like this. “Maybe we shouldn’t.”

Spencer chuckles. “Having second thoughts? If you’re worried about Kate—don’t be. I know she won’t mind.”

“It’s not her I’m concerned about,” I tell him. “It’s the guy she’s with. If we scare him away, she’ll be
pissed
.”

“Hmm.” Spencer considers it for a moment. “I never thought of it that way, but it makes sense. Tell you what. You decide. Worst comes to worst,” he winks, “you could spend the night at my place if you end up sexiled.”

I laugh. “Don’t push your luck, buster.”

Spencer grins. “Just a suggestion.”

One that I’m all-too-willing to take
, I think to myself.

“If you want to catch them, you’d better decide soon,” Spencer reminds me. “Clock’s ticking.”

I chew my lip. Decisions, decisions.

Finally, I nod. “Okay. Let’s go.”

We rush from our hiding spot hand-in-hand, running over the lawn to the front doors. Just before we get there, Spencer tenses.

I’m pulled back by his sudden stop. “What?” I ask.

He glances at the parked cars on the street. “I know that truck.”

I look—and gasp. It’s Andrew’s. What’s he doing here?

Spencer looks at me as if expecting an explanation. It doesn’t take me long to catch on: He thinks Andrew is here for me!

“Spencer, I promise you, I have no idea why Andrew is here. I haven’t even spoken to him since the party last week.”

Spencer shifts his eyes onto me. It’s not a friendly look. “So you admit you know the truck is his.”

I’m flabbergasted by the flat tone of his voice. Is he threatened? “Of course I know it’s his,” I hiss. “He took me on a date the first week on campus.”

I don’t know if I imagine it, but just for a second, I think I hear an angry growl come from Spencer’s throat. “Have you been out with him since?”

I pull my hand out of his. I don’t like the tone of his voice. I also don’t like the unexplained animosity the two guys have for each other. Both of them—both Andrew and Spencer—get as envious as mother hens over their chicks when the other is brought up.

“Have you, Paige?” Spencer repeats. “Tell me the truth.”

I don’t have a chance to voice my irritation with his probing question when the front doors of my dorm burst open. Katy runs out with Andrew. Her hair’s a mess. They’re holding hands, and in such a rush they don’t notice me or Spencer.