Mind-Body Workbook for PTSD (14 page)

Body Tension:

______________________________

______________________________

1. Is your body tense? Yes ____ No ____
   
2. Is your mind cluttered? Yes ____ No ____
   
3. Is your distress due to the other person’s behavior? Yes ____ No ____
   
4. Is your distress due to the requirement in the oval? Yes ____ No ____
   

If you believe the distress was from the other person’s behavior, you are letting yourself be victimized by circumstances. As long as you do
not
recognize that how you wanted the other person to act is
your
requirement, you will suffer distress and stay in the I-System loop. Simply recognizing your requirement and seeing what that requirement is doing to you prompts a dramatic mental and physical shift so that you are no longer a victim of circumstance.

3. Experience for yourself whether or not you are a victim of circumstance. Write the same behavior on the following line, and in the oval, write how you wanted the other person to be. Before you continue writing,listen to background sounds, feel your body’s pressure on your seat, sense your feet on the floor, and feel the pen in your hand. Once you’re settled, keep feeling the pen in your hand and start writing. Watch the ink go onto the paper and listen to background sounds.

Disturbing experience Map with bridging

Other Person’s Behavior: _______________

1. How is this map the same as or different from the previous one?
   

   ______________________________
   

   ______________________________
   

   ______________________________
   

2. Are you a victim of circumstance? Yes ____ No ____
   

Do you see how, on the previous map, the statement in the oval was a requirement because it activated your I-System? On this map, the same statement in the oval is
not
a requirement. It’s a natural thought, because your I-System was calm, and your body tension and mental clutter reduced dramatically. You are now prepared to deal with that situation with a clear mind and relaxed body. Your mind-body bridging practice doesn’t take away your natural expectations of how others should behave, but it does take away the devastation your requirements cause, which prepares you to heal yourself and deal actively and confidently with your life circumstances.

Day Two     Date:____________

Rita, who was brutally raped four years ago, felt anxious about having flashbacks, because she always felt overwhelmed whenever she had one. She began attending a women’s group that used the principles in this workbook. Using mind-body bridging tools, she recognized her requirement:
I shouldn’t have flashbacks
. She then asked, “How will my knowing my requirement stop my flashbacks?” The group leader explained that a flashback is a reliving of the unhealed wound the traumatic events caused. The more Rita worked on calming her I-System, the more chances she had to heal herself. A couple of weeks later, she reported having fewer flashbacks, and more important, she said that when they did occur, they were “less earthshaking, and I no longer experienced myself as soiled, dirty, and spoiled.” Using her mind-body bridging practices, she experienced a new, expansive self and said, “I’m bigger than my flashbacks.”

1. Log any situations that prompt you to become upset, tense, irritable, anxious, or overwhelmed or that bring on your PTSD symptoms. Realize that always underlying the situation is a requirement you weren’t aware of, not the event that’s “causing” your distress. Recognizing the requirement prompts changes in your thoughts, actions, and PTSD symptoms.

2. Do a Today My Crisis Is… map. Pick a situation from the previous log that was a crisis and write it in the oval. Take three to four minutes to jot whatever thoughts come to mind. Describe your body tension at the bottom of the map.

Body Tension:

______________________________

______________________________

Were your PTSD symptoms increased in the crisis? Yes ____ No ____

Identify the requirements on your map (for example, if today’s crisis for you is
I don’t have enough money to pay my bills
, a requirement would be
I should have enough money to pay the bills
).

______________________________

______________________________

______________________________

Your I-System’s commotion machine has you feeling distressed, bitter, angry, and hopeless, and believing that anyone in your shoes would feel the same way. Now ask yourself,
Isn’t it bad enough that our economy is in the tank? Why do I have to let my I-System cause a personal meltdown, limiting my natural ability to solve my money problems?
You have no control over the current financial crisis or others’ behavior. You
do
have control over defusing
your
requirements and healing your PTSD.

3. Do another map on the same crisis, this time using your bridging awareness practices. Write the crisis in the next oval. Before you continue writing, listen to background sounds, feel your body’s pressure on your seat, sense your feet on the floor, and feel the pen in your hand. Once you are settled, keep feeling the pen in your hand, as you write your thoughts for the next few minutes. Watch the ink go onto the paper and listen to background sounds.

1. How did your mind-body state differ between the two maps?
   

   ______________________________
   

   ______________________________
   

2. Which mind-body state lets you handle the crisis better?
   

   ______________________________
   

3. Can you see that it’s your I-System, not the event, that’s causing your distress?
   

   ______________________________
   

   ______________________________
   

You now know firsthand that it’s your I-System, not the event, causing your misery and preventing you from healing yourself. Also, this activity shows the power of building a strong daily bridging awareness practice. When you feel body tension, use your bridging awareness tools to create the emotional space to defuse requirements during your busy day.

Steps to Recognize and Defuse Requirements

Having a flare-up of your PTSD symptoms or becoming distressed and overwhelmed means you have a hidden requirement you aren’t yet aware of. Use these steps to help you recognize and defuse your requirements:

1. Begin developing your skills by using them in simple situations—like when waiting for a long red light, experiencing a dropped phone call, or dealing with impolite clerks—and gradually build to using the skills in more complex relationships and situations.
   
2. Become aware of the earliest signs of an overactive I-System (such as noticing specific body tension, as well as depressor, fixer, and storyline activity), and let them prompt you to look for the underlying requirement.
   
3. Use your bridging awareness practice and thought labeling tools to interrupt the I-System’s commotion machine and clearly identify the underlying requirement. Realize that it’s
   your
   requirement about the activity, person, or situation—
   not
   the activity, person, or situation—that’s causing your distress.
   
4. Once you feel a release (gradually or suddenly) about the situation, you have defused your requirement. That previously out-of-control devastation melts into a more manageable disappointment. Describe what happened when you used your mind-body bridging tools to defuse your requirements in a meltdown situation. Here’s an example of what a client wrote:
   

   Recently, I learned that my twelve-year-old son was smoking. I became enraged, screaming at him and threatening him, which gave me a migraine. Later, when I learned he was smoking again, I felt my jaw tighten. Noticing this signal, I realized my I-System was switched on. I then listened to the sound of the dogs barking outside, which made me feel more settled and helped me see my requirement:
   My twelve-year-old son shouldn’t smoke.
   I was now clear that it was
   my
   requirement, not just his behavior, that caused my added distress. I was really disappointed in my son, but didn’t melt down. I was able to calm myself down enough to discuss the situation with my son, and felt we were gaining on the problem.
   

   ______________________________
   

   ______________________________
   

   ______________________________
   

   ______________________________
   

Now, in the larger vessel of your expansive true self (review figure 1.1), your body settles, your thinking clears, and your choices flow. You’re healing your PTSD symptoms.

Day Three     Date:____________

1. Throughout the day, focus on your relationships. Notice any signs of an overactive I-System: body tension, cluttered mind, storylines, and depressor-fixer activity. What did the other person do that activated your I-System? How did you react? Did you recognize the hidden requirements?

1. Observe the signs of an overactive I-System in your relationships:
   

   

2. Now that you can see it was your requirement, not the other person’s behavior, that caused your distress, are you ready to defuse your requirements in real time, as you go about your life? Yes ____ No ____
   

   Defusing requirements and healing yourself go hand in hand.