Love and Other Wicked Games (A Wicked Game Novel) (24 page)

The soft, tiny hairs on her skin stood up straight, almost as if she had been electrified.

His mouth left hers and she gasped, her body lost without that connection to him. She put her hands to either side of his face and tried to kiss his lips again but he stopped her. She felt him smile against her skin as he kissed and licked at her chin and her jawbone. He blew the sweet air of his breath against the places his mouth explored. She shivered from the chilly sensation.

Her knees shook and he caught her, drawing her back close to him.

“Careful. Careful now, Ell.”

But she didn’t want to be careful. And she didn’t want him to be careful. She wanted him to do it again and again and again. And once more after that. She wanted him to hold her—hold her against him, hold her down, hold her any which way, so long as he never let go. And then she wanted him to explore her in places that she never even knew she’d wanted explored until now. She wanted his mouth on her and all over her. She wanted
him
on her and all over her. She wanted him to touch her. Anywhere. Everywhere.

And mostly, she just wanted
him
.

“Ellie. God,” he murmured against the ear his tongue was toying with. “I just—I—” He grasped her tighter. In once swift swirl he turned her around and guided her to the wall. He laid his body against hers, pushing and covering her. His mouth went back to work at the place behind her ear where it met her jaw. His tongue flicked lusciously on her neck, covering her in slow, cool licks. Soon, his mouth found the neckline on her dress. He darted his tongue just under the edge and ran it softly along the very top of her breasts where they overflowed from her corset. She twisted her fingers in his hair, pulling and gasping with each tiny spasm that he encouraged into being.

Then, with one quick downward pull, he released her shoulders from the confines of the dress. The cool stone of the wall was such a welcome and wonderful feeling against her flushed skin that she nearly didn’t notice when his hands went around behind her, working at the ties of her corset. Releasing her breasts. But then she felt his mouth on her again. She definitely noticed that.

His mouth covered one nipple with an icy and fiery touch. His tongue tapped rhythmically against it, coaxing it to stand rigid with arousal. She felt him shudder against her slightly as he suckled and licked. His hand went to her other breast and began to tease this one as well with tiny twists and pinches.

And then something came over her. Something so thoroughly un-Ellie like that it scared her and excited her at the same time. She wanted more and instead of just waiting around hoping it would happen, she decided to take control. She wrapped her fingers in his hair again and pressed his head against her, guiding him to the places she wanted him and his mouth to be. She pressed her body against him in slow, cadenced motions enticing him to do the same. Even though she was wearing several layers of clothes she could still feel how hard he was when he pressed his hips against her. And with each pulse of shared movement she could feel the tension in his body become tighter and his need for her grow stronger.

With a soft pop of the lips he detached himself from her right breast. She inhaled sharply, whimpering at this terrible betrayal but he covered her cries with his mouth and fought them back with his tongue. His right arm went behind her back pulling her in as his mouth continued to dominate hers and his hand continued to twist and pull at her erect nipple. He dug his nails into the delicate flesh of her back raking out more cries and moans. This obviously pleased him and he sucked her bottom lip before forcing his tongue into her mouth once more, further and deeper. She writhed against him.

“More,” she somehow managed to murmur into his mouth.

She felt his mouth smile against hers then detach, only long enough to kiss at her ear as he whispered inside, “Tell me. Tell me what you want more of.”

“I want—” her voice caught as he licked at her ear. She couldn’t steady her words. “—I want you to kis—kiss me. And—And touch m—me—”

“Where?” his voice tickled.

“Everywhere.”

“Everywhere?”

She nodded.

He rolled her nipple between his finger and thumb. “Here?”

“Yes.”

He kissed and licked the delicate crook of her neck. “Here?”

“Y—yes.”

His hand swam down the front of her body and cupped the sensitive spot between her legs. “…Here?”

She shuddered as she realized how slick she had become. It was all she could do to shakily nod her head up and down. And just barely.

“For a moment, just a moment, I thought about stopping, holding off and watching as you waited and begged for more,” he whispered intermittently between kisses as he continued to massage her with his hand. “But Lord, that I could keep my lips off of you for that long.”

And so, he covered her with his mouth once more.

Ellie threw her right leg up around his hip holding him tight as she thrust against him. She felt him change position between her legs in such a way that when he removed his hand the firm length of him replaced it, pressing up against her through their clothes. He moved his hips against her in a smooth motion and she felt a powerful pressure and need building up inside of her. Her lips moved faster and harder against his lips trying with all of her might to reach whatever it was that she was feeling. She wanted to yell and scream out. She wanted to rip off his clothes and she wanted him to rip off hers.

“Cal, Cal,” she whispered against him in tiny mewing moans.

She forced her hands between them and ran her palms along the shape of his chest as she had done earlier. But this time she allowed herself to feel him and know him. Her hands explored the broad expanse without abandon, outward and inward in large sweeping motions, and then up and down along his sides until they made their way to the bottom of his shirt. She grasped it tightly and pulled it loose, allowing her hands entry. She immediately reached inside, feverous to touch his skin, and slid her hands up and down allowing them to brush softly over his nipples. He shivered slightly and she dug her fingers in with satisfaction. The feel of his skin against hers sent jolts of tickling vibrations through her nerves.

It made her want to touch him more. And in more places.

She slid her hands downward again to the top of his trousers and paused for just a moment before continuing. She was on the cusp of his arousal. Her body quickened in anticipation and then—

Something on the balcony crashed.

Cal immediately jumped back from Ellie and then pulled her to the side into a more shadowed area.

“Right your dress!” he hissed in a panic.

With shaking fingers, Ellie pulled up her dress into its proper position and adjusted her body inside of it.

Cal took a careful step forward and held up his hand behind him signaling for Ellie to stay hidden. As if she’d needed any encouraging. He looked around slowly, scanning the balcony for any sign that they were not alone and that they had been compromised. After a moment, she saw Cal put his head in his hands and shake it from side to side, before turning around and returning to her at a normal pace.

“Damn birds,” he mumbled. “Or some sort of critter anyway. Knocked over one of the flower pots over here. It went clear over the edge of the balcony.”

Ellie breathed a sigh of relief. “So we haven’t been compromised.”

“No. Not yet anyway. But we best hurry inside and go our separate ways before someone comes to see what that noise was all about.”

She nodded in agreement. But she wasn’t about to let him get away that easily. “Then what?”

“I told you. I’ll send for you. Very soon.”

Ellie stared at him through slit eyes.

“I promise you, Ellie.
My Ellie.
” He put his hand at the base of her head and pulled her in, kissing her forehead. “Now go.”

She nodded and the two of them left the balcony heading off in opposite directions.

Ellie hesitated for just a moment and wondered if maybe being compromised wouldn’t be so bad after all. When she looked back to Cal, she saw him hesitate for just a moment too.

Cal kept his promise.

He sent for Ellie quietly the next morning. Even though she’d tried to hide it from him, he could tell she was absolutely bursting. It did his heart good to see her so excited and also to know that he was part of the reason why.

The next several weeks found him taking Ellie to several more meetings of varying sizes and at varying locations around the city. Some meetings were more structured necessitating that the two of them remain with each other, quietly listening in the background, while some meetings were informal as the first one had been. It was at these times that Ellie was most in her element. She grew closer to the people, to those such as Caitlin and her family and so many others, and there was even the occasional moment when she was able to coax a smile from the cynics like Sean. With each passing meeting Ellie learned a bit more helpful information for Cal, and he learned even more about himself.

For so much of his life he’d lived in fear of himself. He feared his mistakes mostly and the way they had affected others. There were smaller choices he regretted—his attitude towards others growing up, his youthful rakish pursuits—but while those always weighed on his mind and his heart, they weren’t what kept him up at night. It was the other things he’d done, or rather hadn’t done, that kept him on edge.

He often wondered how many lives he could have changed if only he’d given Hart the time of day during that Winter break. If only he’d taken the time to talk to him and understand. Perhaps he could have started his work a decade earlier if he’d cared about someone besides himself. But he hadn’t done that and he always felt the sting of the suffering he’d caused.

It was for this reason that he’d never felt good enough, worthy enough, or just plain enough for anyone or anything. Everyone made mistakes, Cal knew that, but in his eyes, his mistakes had always felt much bigger and much worse. They cast a shadow that eclipsed everything around them and darkened everything they touched until at most times he could no longer see even a sliver of light to lead him to safety.

“That was the thing about perspectives,” he’d murmured to himself one day recently. “Everyone had a different one.” And that was why, he’d decided, having a partner in life was so very important.

Ellie had never seen him the way that he saw himself. She’d never seen him as anything other than Cal, as a person worthy and deserving of respect and help. And she’d been doing it from the very beginning, helping him. She’d helped him from the first moment that they met when she didn’t even know who he was or what she was helping him do. And then she’d continued to help him in other ways before he’d even known himself that he needed the help. But she had known and she had known how to fix it. She always did. It was true she still didn’t know his name or everything about the past that troubled him so deeply, but she didn’t have to know that to see into his heart. Which was something she was constantly reminding him.

“Haven’t you been paying attention?” she’d ask him with a smile.

“Yes,” he would tell her. “Finally.” And that was the truth.

He’d been so concerned with convincing her that he was not that hated man that he never stopped to realize he needed to convince himself of it first. He had been that man once, there was no denying it, and sometimes he feared he would never be anything else. But she made him feel as if he was worth more than the worst parts of himself, because even if there was more bad than good, she said the good was always worth more. And she showed him that he was not defined by his mistakes, rather he was defined by the way in which he sought to correct them. That showed his true person and intent of character.

And he sure as hell was trying to do everything in his power to make amends for the things he had done. Not just to Hart either, but to everyone. To Ellie, and to her friend Mandy and her family, and to everyone else in this city that had ever been touched by those god-forsaken hell holes they called mills. And it was because of Ellie and her never ending care, confidence, and compassion that any of these things were even possible. He would have given up on himself if it wasn’t for Ellie.

These days whenever he was with her a sense of peace and understanding surrounded him with a warm glow. He’d never felt anything better in his entire life.

Which is exactly why he should have known it wouldn’t last.

Cal was staying at the pub again as he had been for a while. It was much easier to make his way back here after late nights and late meetings with Ellie than to go all the way home to his villa on the outskirts of the city, especially by foot. There was also the matter of his uncle to consider. He’d been a real pain lately as it related to the business, more so than usual that was, and Cal was happy to have some space from the man. The pub was the perfect place for that as well, since none of the people who knew he stayed here even knew his real identity.

And it was that reason why Cal was surprised when he heard a knock at his door. It was late afternoon and he was preparing for an evening outing with Ellie. He’d just finished washing up and was finally getting around to shaving his beard when three sporadic knocks echoed against his door. His hand slipped and he nicked the line of his jaw with the straight blade.

Shit.
“Just a minute!” he called. He dropped the razor into the water basin with a splash as he reached for a cloth. He dabbed at the cut a few times inspecting the severity as several more knocks sounded at his door.

“Just a minute!” he called again as he made sure the bleeding had stopped. But the person at the door either didn’t hear him or didn’t care because before Cal could set down the rag and dry his hands, the sporadic knocks became a series of rapid fist pounding.

God!
He threw down the towel and went to the door with two large steps, throwing it open. “What the hell do you want?”

As surprised as he’d been to hear knocking on his door he was more surprised when he opened it and saw who was standing on the other side.