Letting go of Grace (16 page)

“Ma’am, I’m going to have to ask you to leave the premises.” I laugh at him and shake my head.

“Sorry, that won’t happen, I work here, remember? By the way Aiden said it was OK if I come by tomorrow.” I look away from him and gaze back at Shane.

“Hannah, we need to talk.” Shane grabs my elbow and leads me down the hall.

“What, Shane?”

“He didn’t want to see you and you imposed. You shouldn’t have pushed him, Hannah. He has a lot going on right now, and he doesn’t need this on top of it,” he says pointing in the direction of Aiden’s room.

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

“You’re his downfall. Listen, I’m not spilling his secrets to you, when he is ready, he will tell you. His girlfriend left him this morning and ran for the hills. He thinks everyone is running from him.” I start to feel sick. When I felt at my lowest, he was there. He’s always been there.

“I know, Shane, I told him I’m not going anywhere,” I mumble softly.

“But you chose Grant.”

“That doesn’t mean we can’t be friends. I do love Aiden, you know. I care about him, I want to make sure he gets better, and I will do everything I can to make sure he does.” I look up at the ceiling because I don’t want him to see that I’m on the verge of tears. I stretch my neck and look away from him.

“Just don’t hurt him again.”

“That was never my intention,” I whisper.

“I want to check on John and Autumn. I’ll see you at home, OK?” I finally glance at him and he just nods at his head and walks back towards Aiden’s room. I start to walk not really having a destination yet. I spot the ladies room and slip in. I’m relieved to find it’s empty. I make my way over to the sinks and catch my reflection in the mirror in front of me. I look defeated. I finally let the tears fall down my heated face. What have I done? Have I broke him? I bring a shaky hand to my trembling lips. I try to get a grip on my emotions, but a small whimper comes out. I will try again tomorrow and the day after, and each day until he is discharged. He will talk to me and we will work this out. I need him in my life, at the very least as a friend. I blow out the crippling air in my lungs and pull it together to visit everyone else.

MRS. GRACE AND ADDY ARE
fine and are being discharged. They will head straight home to the Cape. John and Autumn will be here for a while. The burns they endured brought tears to my eyes. I couldn’t stay in their rooms too long because I was afraid my sobs would wake them from their induced slumbers.

That night we all eat dinner together, but Shane and I don’t speak much. I distance myself from Grant without really meaning to. He doesn’t seem to notice because he is too busy trying to figure out what happened and trying to fix it. I know he is off, but I don’t push him and he doesn’t give any information up. After the nighttime routine with the kids I don’t go back downstairs to spend time with him. I climb into bed and think about Aiden and how I can fix the problems between us. I don’t want to hurt him again, but I know I will. I always do.

The morning comes faster than I expected. I fell asleep early and wake up late. I have to get ready for work and get the kids out the door and to my parents’ house. This morning we don’t have time to all sit down together for breakfast, but no one is in the kitchen when I get down there. Grant left a note on the countertop letting me know he and Shane had an early meeting.

Autopilot kicks in and before I know it I’m walking into the hospital. I make sure I walk to my office instead of Aiden’s room. I don’t want a rushed visit. I will take my lunch and spend it in his room trying to break down the walls he’s put up. I have a date with my desk and a pile of paperwork that needs to be done so I dive right in.

Hours later my phone rings taking me out of my work. I reach for it and lean it against my shoulder while continuing my work.

“Hannah, this is Stacey, Aiden Grace’s RN.”

“Is everything OK?”

“Aiden is asking for you, do you think you could come over?”

“I’ll be right there.” I’m up and running out of my office in a flash. I take the stairs to make better time. I have to slow my pace once I make it to his floor, partially to catch my breath and partially to look as normal as possible. I feel my heart tighten and I pray that he is OK. As I pass the guard, I give him a sweet smirk. I laugh in my head at him. Aiden is now in my view and he is smiling. I feel hopeful as I step closer to him.

“I could get used to this,” he says looking me over. Clearly I’m still out of breath and my cheeks are flushed.

“I thought something was wrong,” I offer, taking in a deep breath hoping it will steady me. I study his mood and he grins back at me. I look over and see Shane with an amused look on his face. Great, they both think this is funny. I see something out of the corner of my eye so I turn towards it.

“Hannah, right?” the woman says to me as she places down towels and soap. I have my ID badge on so I just nod at her.

“Aiden wants to take a shower and asks that you help assist him.” I glance over at Aiden and he is grinning like the Cheshire cat. Oh hell.

“Sure, I will take care of it,” I reply rolling my eyes and hiding my smile. Aiden being playful is way better than him being angry. I never want to see the fury he wore on his face yesterday. She walks out and Shane stands up.

“Well, I think this is my cue to leave.” He walks by me and kisses my head as he says goodbye. I stroll over to Aiden.

“Do you have clothes to change into?” He motions to the dresser and I look through it and take a pair of boxer briefs out and pajama pants.

“No shirt?” he asks me.

“You think you could get into one? I don’t see any button up ones.” I look again.

“I could get you a clean gown if you want.” I look over at him and he is beaming with that sexy smile again.

“That would be wonderful. Thank you.” I head out into the hallway and look around for a chart with supplies on them. I give up and walk over to the nurse’s station. I see the nurse that was just in the room and she stands up, so I ask her where I can find one. No surprise to me that Aiden is the main attraction on the floor. I can just picture all the nurses jumping up to offer to get me one and bring it in. I thank Stacey and head back into Aiden’s room smiling because I know they are all watching in hopes of catching sight of him shirtless. When I get into his room I walk right in front of him and offer my hands. He takes them but doesn’t stand up.

“I’m sorry about yesterday. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings,” he says looking down.

“I want you in my life, but I just don’t know how yet.” He finally looks up at me when I squeeze his hand.

“We will figure this out, Aiden. I’m not giving up on you yet.” I smile at him and he finally smiles back, this time it reaches his eyes. They are back to their beautiful blue oasis that I’m used to seeing.

“Let’s do this,” I announce and I help him up. He stands, but slumps over. I know he is in pain and I want to take it away. I start to take his gown off exposing his horribly bruised body. I look at his chest and see where the seat belt ripped through his skin leaving it raw and burned. His shoulder is bruised and swollen so bad that you can’t make out his collarbone which I know is broken in three spots. I can’t believe all the damage that has been done to his beautiful body. I just look him over as he stands in front of me in nothing but pajama bottoms.

“Let me get naked and you can keep staring at me,” he teases shaking me out of my stare.

“Ha, ha. Very funny.” I follow him into the bathroom with the towels and soap. I busy myself with turning the shower on and getting the water to the right temperature. Then I turn and start to grab for Aiden’s pants to help him out of them.

“Well, I would have never imagined this,” he states, laughing as I get his pants down for him to step out of them.

“Oh stop it and get in so I can wash you up.” I get the soap and washcloth ready and lean in the shower to clean him. I go slow, fearing I might hurt him. He tries to keep a straight face, but I can see him cringe on and off. I ease off, but he tells me to keep on going. I go lower and he smiles as he reacts to my hands cleaning him.

“Can you blame me? It’s not like I’m dead,” he laughs.

“I should have one of the nurses out there do this,” I offer, smiling at him.

“Oh hell no, they have been throwing themselves at me. I don’t need them seeing me like this then they would never leave me alone.” I keep smiling at his confidence. He really does have a godlike body.

“I think once you have seen one, you have seen them all,” I state simply.

“Really? So I don’t impress you?” he asks leaning his lips closer to my ear.

“Oh, please, Aiden. Only you would make this sexual. Look at you,” I remark, pointing in between his legs. “You couldn’t even have sex right now, if you wanted to.”

“Is that an offer, Hannah?” he questions through hooded eyes. I turn the water cold and watch him jump.

“Hey!” I can’t help laughing at him. I turn the water off and he gets out. I step back, but he leans his wet body into me.

“Aiden,” I giggle but the damage is already done. I’m soaked. I grab a towel and start drying him off. I get his underwear and his pants on then we walk out of the bathroom. The nurse walks in at that moment. It’s like she was waiting outside the room for us to come out. She stops and gawks at him not even trying to hide it. He smirks at me and I roll my eyes. His hair is still wet and I catch a drop of water as it falls down his chest. I watch the nurse bite her lip and I can’t help but enjoy the view myself. The only difference is I know what his body feels and tastes like. I know what makes him react and what he feels like inside me. The room is suddenly starting to feel extremely hot. I swallow hard and let out a quiet breath. He runs his hand through his hair and grins at the nurse. She blushes and can’t help but smile back.

“Would you mind getting Hannah some new scrubs? I got her pretty wet in the bathroom.” The nurse’s eyes widen to the size of saucers and I start laughing.

“It’s OK. I’ll get a pair when I go up. You have to watch out for this one, he doesn’t play fair.” I look over at Aiden and he smiles.

“Well I can’t help it. I haven’t been naked in front of you in a while. I thought if I got you wet you would take your clothes off too.” I instantly turn ten shades of red and I want to slap him.

“Get in bed Aiden.”

“Oh, I like that idea. Can you get on top though, I’m still a little sore.”

“Aiden James Grace, so help me God,” I start, but he is laughing and I love the sound of it. I take his hand and he looks down at me. Fuck, I still feel it. I step back to get out of the force field of attraction as he steps toward the bed. I help ease him down into bed. I pull the blankets up over his still bare chest like I’m tucking him in, then without thinking I run my hand down his cheek and kiss his forehead. Our eyes meet and his become intense. My heart starts to pound and I think he can hear it.

“Now you be a good boy while I’m gone.” I return to an upright position and prepare to leave when he takes my hand.

“Have me paged if you need anything.”

“I won’t bother you, Hannah, I promise.” He looks over at the nurse who is still frozen in place then looks back at me.

“Yes you will. This is what friends do,” I whisper to him. Then I walk out of the room with the nurse following behind me.

“Hannah, can I speak with you for a moment?”

“Sure, what’s up?” I say as we walk down the hallway together, but I tune her out when I see Grant walking down the hallway. I stop and she does too, losing her words when she sees Grant.

“Hold that thought. I’ll be right back,” I tell her.

Speeding down the hallway, I walk right into Grant’s arms and get greeted with a kiss I’m sure every woman on this floor would be envious of. When he is done kissing me he pulls away and takes a step back.

“You’re all wet, Hannah, what happened?” He looks at me confused. Shit. We said we would make this work so here goes nothing.

“Yeah, I got wet when I helped Aiden out of the shower.” He looks at me and I know he doesn’t like what he is hearing. So I continue.

“Grant, he is a patient. It’s not the first time I have done this,” I remind him. He just stares at me.

“I know,” he sighs.

“I have to get over this whole thing with Aiden.” He kisses me softly.