Instant Orgasm: Excitement at First Touch (10 page)

Figure 4.

Exposing the
clitoris

Try exposing your clitoris and then, with your other hand, touch the clito- ral head for just a brief moment. If you are able to do so, check out how it feels to touch different areas of your clitoris. We like to divide the head of the cli- toris into quadrants: the upper and lower left and the upper and lower right. There is also an upper middle and a lower middle, as well as a bottom area. You can touch each of these using different amounts of pressure and from dif- ferent angles. Everyone’s clitoris is different. Some women have larger ones that are easier to divide into areas, and some women have very small ones that

are impossible to divide up, except for maybe left and right sides. What is im- portant here is to see how
your
clitoris likes to be touched and, if possible, to discover what part of your clitoris feels best when touched and what kinds of

pressure you prefer. There is no wrong or right way to touch yourself. Just ex- periment with brief touches—no stroking yet.

Notice the wetness of your inner lips and introitus with the tip of your fin- ger, or even with your full finger placed parallel to the labia. Touch with any part of your finger, the underside or the edge. You can use your knuckles, or the base of your palm, or any part of your hand, front or back or side. Check out the top of your labia where they almost touch the clitoris. To test the sensa- tion in smaller areas, like a specific spot on your labia, it is best to use your fin- gertip. Compare the sensation between the lower and middle portion of your inner labia. Determine which areas are most sensitive and which feel the most pleasure when touched.

For Both men and Women

A type of touch that both men and women can enjoy is to briefly stroke the in- ner thighs. Place a hand palm-down on each thigh. Or, rather than using the palm, you can use the back of the hand. The action is more of a stroke than just a touch or a squeeze, but no lubrication is necessary as this is not erectile tis- sue. Starting from the genital area, quickly and fairly lightly stroke downward toward the knee. You can also start near the knee and stroke upward toward the genitals. The goal, again, is to feel as much as possible in a short time. After stroking once or twice, take a break and appreciate any sensations. Repeat the stroking action if it feels good to you.

You can also place your fingers on your thighs, pads down, and press with- out stroking. It can be fun to get close to your genitals without touching them and press inward on the inner thigh, alternating between left and right. This can set up a kind of link between the thighs, causing wonderful sensations to pass through the genitals. Use two, three, or four fingertips on each thigh, and press for just a second. Then release and do the same on your other thigh. You can try touching different spots on your inner thighs, moving your hands closer and then farther away from your genitals in a kind of teasing man- ner. You can vary the pressure to determine what feels best. You can alternate

between pressing and lightly stroking. We want you to learn how to feel plea- sure from many kinds of tactile stimulation, and we want you to increase your ability to feel from the very first moment of contact. The touching, coupled with your focused attention, will create greater pleasurable sensations, espe- cially the more you practice these exercises.

Many other body parts enjoy being touched by you or by someone else. It can be very pleasurable to briefly touch your stomach or neck. I love pressing down on my lower abdomen with quite a bit of pressure and then releasing the pressure and repeating the action following a regular rhythm. Doing this feels good before I start masturbating and feels even better after I have been masturbating for some time (see Figure 5). Again, experiment with different amounts of pressure.

Figure 5.

Pressing on
abdomen while
stroking penis

The anal area is endowed with many nerve endings, containing the second highest concentration of nerve endings after the penis or clitoris. Touching the anal area can feel wonderfully sensational. With or without lubricant, you can play around with the whole area using varying amounts of pressure, dif- ferent types of squeezes, and one or more fingers. Try doing this through your clothing or underwear or even naked. Start by touching yourself at a fair dis- tance from your anus, and gradually move your touches closer. Some people may be squeamish about the anus, so respect your own personal boundaries. Penetration is not necessary here. These exercises are meant to be enjoyed.

Sometimes it is okay to push your envelope further than you think you would like, and other times you know when you are going too far.

Y More Exercises Z

In our EMO books we included an exercise called “Connections.” During this exercise a person strokes his or her penis or clitoris (which we call the primary area) at the same time as they are stroking another body part (the second- ary area). Many students don’t go as far as they might with this practice. The results are subtle and usually take some time to manifest. People who don’t see any big, instant changes often stop practicing before giving the exercise a chance and therefore fail to gain the full benefit.

This exercise is extremely important if a person wants to feel more sen- sation at any time they choose. If you want to become orgasmic on the first stroke, or simply by focusing your attention on your pleasure areas, it will be very helpful to create connections between a number of different body parts. The more connections you’ve developed and the deeper they are, the more sensation you can feel. Your body will become highly sensitive; you will notice subtle tingles and stirrings. Overall, you will become more aware of your tac- tile nervous system in a pleasurable way.

In addition to the connections exercise, we have gone into great detail in our previous books describing a series of preliminary exercises, including set- ting up a private space, taking a visual inventory of your body, taking a tactile inventory of your body, and using masturbation for pleasurable effect. All of these are very important, so they bear repeating here for readers who haven’t been exposed to our earlier books. This section and the next one outline these exercises.

Before beginning these exercises, go to the drugstore and check out a few different types of lubricant. We usually use Albolene, an unscented makeup remover that has a thinner consistency than Vaseline. As both Albolene and Vaseline are petroleum-based products, they are not compatible with con- doms. We also like K-Y Jelly and Astroglide, which are water-soluble. Water- based lubes tend to get sticky after they’ve been on the body for a while. If you use a water-based lube, have a cup of warm water nearby to dip your fingers into when the lubricant starts getting tacky.

setting Up Your space

The object here is to create a space where you can do your exercises in private, with no interruptions. The bedroom is probably the first choice, though we have had students who have used the bathroom or other places. Fix up your space so that it is visually appealing. Add pretty items, like flowers or can- dles, and include a tasty treat and something to drink. Also add an item that is pleasant to touch (such as a silk scarf), music you enjoy, and an appealing fragrance (incense, scented candles, essential oils, a rose). Finally, bring in any fantasy, romance novel, or pornography that you desire. You will require a full-length mirror and a hand mirror as well as some lubricant and towels.

You do not have to spend much time creating your space; thirty minutes should be more than enough. We have known people who have spent all day fixing up their space and then were too tired to do anything else.

This exercise is in some ways the most important of all because it sets the tone for the others, so do not skip it. And again, make sure that you will not be disturbed.

Visual Inventory

We believe it is vital for a person to enjoy who they are physically; we want you to fall in love with yourself and your body. The best present you can give your partner is a turned-on body, and if you do not like your body you will not get turned on easily. This exercise is extremely useful in learning to appreciate and love yourself and the way you look. The object is to look at yourself in the mirror and notice what you like about your body. Usually we look into a mir- ror to see what is wrong; for instance, to determine whether our hair is out of place or if we have a zit on our chin. For the purpose of this exercise, look into the mirror to determine what you like about your body. Start by noticing any- thing that strikes you in a positive way. It can be any part of your body as long as you like or love it. The more parts of your body you can approve of, the eas- ier it will be to approve of more. Learn to love yourself the way you are; don’t focus on how you think you should look or compare yourself to some unreal supermodel. Use the full-length mirror and the hand mirror to see yourself from many different angles. Do this exercise for as long as you enjoy it.

Like the first one, this exercise is vitally important. We urge you to include it in your pleasuring repertoire.

tactile Inventory

Here is your chance to touch yourself all over your body,
except your geni- tals
. Touch yourself in all kinds of ways, including pinching, scratching, light

touches, firm touches, quick touches, and long or short strokes. The goals are to see what feels best, to learn to feel pleasure with a variety of strokes and pressures, and to increase your capacity to focus your attention on the places you are touching.

When we ask you to combine your touches with your full attention, we mean that we want you to isolate the area in your mind to allow it to feel as much as it can in the moment. Doing this to yourself is easier than having someone else do it to you because your own touch will not be a surprise. Nor will you feel any vulnerability. This is your time, and the goal is to experience as much pleasure as you possibly can in this moment. If you find your mind wandering, just notice it, and then put your attention back onto the sensa- tions. Notice which parts of your body are the most sensitive and which ar- eas prefer a light or a firm touch. Do this exercise for as long as it is fun to do. There is no time limit, minimum or maximum, and breaks are encouraged.

Try a single touch on different areas, especially the ones containing erec- tile tissue (nipples, lips), but also on your thighs or stomach or neck—any area that is responsive and feels good to touch. Notice whether you feel any sensa- tion in any other part of your body, including your genitals, when you touch these spots. Remember, for now, to avoid touching the genitals.