Her Last Wish (6 page)

At any rate, I didn’t
see her at all that day. Not knowing her phone number, I wanted to just go by
her apartment, but I decided that would have been too creepy. And surprisingly,
I wasn’t in a huge hurry to get everything signed. I wanted her to have the
time to look over everything to make sure it suited her, as well. Sure, the
whole deal was for me and my happiness, but I wanted her to be completely comfortable
with everything, too. She played a very important part in it.

The next day, class
began for the week. As usual, she arrived before the rest of the class began
pouring in. Although I had a tendency to ignore her (and everyone else), I
decided that today would be different. I had a lot to look forward to, and she
was the reason for it all.

“Good morning,
Charlie,” I said with a smile as she took her seat.

“Good morning,” she
replied, seemingly stunned that I’d bothered to say anything. I supposed it
would be a bit strange when I’d never actually acknowledged her in class,
before. “How are you?”

“I was wondering if you
had anything to do after class, today. My lawyer says the paperwork is ready,
and I need you to look over it to make sure it’s to your liking.”

“Well …” She looked
slightly uneasy. “I had another class. But if you really want to get it done
today, I can skip. I haven’t missed any of it yet. I somehow doubt one day will
kill me.”

“Are you sure? We can
wait until you’re done here for the day.”

“No. It’s totally
fine.”

I nodded. “Okay. Meet
me after class, then.”

While I watched her
pull her supplies out of her bag, I had to admit I felt guilty for keeping her
from her other class. I didn’t want to disrupt her life any more than
necessary. I certainly didn’t want her academic career to suffer in any way.
But she didn’t seem too worried about it. Just uncomfortable.

However, an admittedly
selfish part of me felt relief at her acceptance of the earlier time frame. I
simply couldn’t wait to get all the paperwork over with. I needed to move on to
a happier stage in my life. I needed to see this plan take shape. Plus, once I
saw her in person again, I was oddly aware of how much I wanted her to be a
part of my life, even for the relatively short time period required for
gestation.

As soon as the last of
the class had filtered in, I smiled at every single one of them. I couldn’t
help it. Nothing was going to ruin this for me.

“Good morning,
everyone!”

***

Charlie

Yep. It was official.
He’d finally lost his mind. And I clearly wasn’t the only one who thought so.
The whole class looked at him as if he’d grown a new head. And the funniest
thing was that it was all over a simple “Good morning.” But that “Good morning”
held more enthusiasm than we’d seen from him the entire semester. It was kind
of nice … and a little frightening.

The rest of the class
went about the same way. It was like he had turned into a whole new person
overnight. Although he’d always shown interest in his subject, he’d never shown
any interest in
us
. He’d never cared whether or not we’d read our
assignments, and he sure as heck never cared what we thought about them. I knew
this whole surrogacy thing was important to him, but I had never expected this
much of a difference in his overall attitude just by the knowledge that it
would happen. And I hadn’t even
signed
anything yet. I knew I would, and
I’m sure
he
knew I would. But I would have thought he wouldn’t get too
excited about anything until there was something a bit more official, maybe not
even until there was an actual pregnancy.

Though I suppose I
hadn’t really expected anything, at all. I barely knew him. I hadn’t even known
him when his wife was alive. I wondered what kind of person he was back then.
Was he the person I saw in front of me? If so, I felt worse for him than I had
before. How much pain would a person have to go through in order to go from the
happy, enthusiastic person in front of me to the cold, distant man he’d been
since I’d walked into his class for the first time last semester? Or was he
cold and distant because, deep down, he was that broken and battered man I saw
the other day? And I could still tell he wasn’t
completely
happy. I knew
a front when I saw one. But I somehow got the feeling that he was acting happy
so he could make himself
be
happy. For his sake, I hope it worked out
for him. I never wanted him to be so emotionally defeated again. He deserved
peace. Not to mention, I was pretty sure that level of anguish for prolonged
periods of time was the stuff serial killers were made of. If I was going to
help him with something so important, he needed to keep it together!

Once class was over, I
packed up my things as slowly as possible, staying in my seat and waiting until
everyone else filed out. I didn’t want to make anything look out of the
ordinary. Although I had agreed to do such a huge favor for him, the whole
class didn’t need to know about it. I didn’t want them to think that I was
doing it for anything in return. I wasn’t. If I passed the class with flying
colors, it would be because I worked my butt off for it. I would make sure that
point was clear to him when I spoke with both him and the lawyer later.

When I finally packed
up the last of it, I searched around the room to make sure everyone was gone and
then turned my attention to the front. When my eyes met his, I was greeted with
a smile that I couldn’t quite translate. It was warm and inviting, but somehow
there was something more to it. It seemed the more alive Professor Mason
appeared, the more mystery there was to him. He wasn’t as exposed. While I was
overall okay with that, I wondered what the heck I’d gotten myself into.

“Are you ready?” he
asked.

“Yes, sir,” I replied, pulling
my heavy bag over my shoulder.

He smiled again and led
me through the hall, out of the building, and to his car. I tossed my bag in
the back and climbed in.

After a couple minutes
of silent driving, he finally spoke up. “Are you sure you want to do this? I’ll
understand if you back out now. I swear there won’t be any hard feelings.”

I shook my head. “I
won’t back out. I told you I would help you, and that’s what I will do. If you
don’t want me to go through with it anymore, you’ll have to tell me yourself.”

“I definitely want you
to help me with this. It’s just … You know this could make things a bit
complicated for us, right?”

“Not if we don’t let
it.”

Chapter Eight

Connor

It was hard to hide my
surprise when the entire drive and visit with the lawyer flowed smoothly. I
think I somehow expected it to blow up in my face as everything
else
regarding the surrogate search had
up to her involvement. But, like everything
else with Charlie, it was shockingly easy. She seemed to make all the pieces
fit together perfectly.

It felt oddly natural
having her around. After only a few days of actually paying attention to her
(and a few days of my attempt at acting like a perfectly sane human being), it
was certainly an impressive feat. I couldn’t stop smiling the whole drive back
to the school to take Charlie to her car. I was just so happy to have her
there.

She didn’t change the
contract too much. She agreed to my terms and only added the stipulation that I
treat her as I’d treat any other student. I didn’t see how that would be a
problem. Academically, anyways. I supposed I’d always had a small fascination
with her that might keep me from treating her like a student outside of class.
I’d somehow let that fascination grow, and I feared it would get out of
control. I decided that in order to keep my agreement on the academic part, I
would have to grade papers without looking at names until afterward. If I knew
that it was hers from the beginning, I would hang on every word, as I did the
whole time I chatted with her in person.

It’s funny how someone
like Charlie made me wonder if angels did actually exist. I had never put much
stock in it before. But she had come at a time when I needed someone like her
most. I also worried about the concept. If angels existed, it was likely that
Elizabeth had joined their ranks. If anyone deserved those wings, it would have
been Elizabeth. And if that were the case, she had been watching over me the
whole time. What would she have thought of my strange feelings for Charlie?
Would she have felt betrayed over the possibility that I could direct my
attention so easily to someone else?

But what were my
feelings for Charlie, exactly? I still hadn’t decided. I didn’t think they had
reached a romantic level, but even I had to admit the jealousy I felt when I
saw her with that boyfriend of hers. I still even refused to acknowledge that
he had a name. I didn’t like him enough to use it, anyways. But why did I hate
him? He hadn’t given me a reason. He had that controlling asshole vibe, but
he’d never actually proven it in front of me. And honestly, I decided he better
not
ever
. I wasn’t sure what I’d do about it, but I had a feeling my
career would have been at stake with my probable reaction, perhaps even my
freedom. I already knew that I wouldn’t tolerate anyone treating Charlie badly
in my presence, regardless of their relationship to her. I told myself that I
felt that way because it was in my part of the contract to protect her and my
interests, but that was a lie. It had nothing to do with any potential children
that she would help Elizabeth and I carry. I wanted to protect
her
.

Regardless, the papers
were signed, and the process would start the very next day. We had made an
appointment with the fertility specialist. It was decided that I would pick her
up from her apartment, and we would go together. I knew a lot of men wouldn’t
want to be there, but this was the last link to Elizabeth that I had. I wanted
to be there for
everything
. Fortunately, Charlie had no objections to
it. She seemed to fully understand, perhaps even more than
I
did.

Even though everything appeared
to stay on the path I’d hoped it would, I had a hard time sleeping that night.
It seemed as if every fear that could possibly enter my thoughts on the subject
lingered in the back of my mind, distracting me from any hope of rest. What if
none of the eggs took and I was left with no other option? What if Charlie
became too attached to the baby and hated me by the end of the pregnancy for
taking it away from her? I couldn’t stand the idea of her having any negative
thoughts about me.

Before I knew it,
morning came. I’m sure I looked awful, but Charlie never said anything about it
when I met her at her door. She just smiled as she had every morning since I
met her. Unlike most of those mornings, however, I smiled back.

“Are you ready for
this?” she asked. Something in her tone told me that she was uncomfortable.

“Definitely,” I
replied. “Are you?”

She simply nodded.

“Are you nervous?”

“A bit. I don’t know
what I’m getting myself into. I’ve never been pregnant before.” She studied my
face. “I hope you don’t think that means I’ll back out. I’m still in this.”

I couldn’t help but
laugh. “I believe you. And I understand why you feel that way. I would be
nervous if I were in your place. I’m already pretty nervous in mine.”

“Why is that?”

“I have never been
around babies. Before Elizabeth …” I paused. It was still so hard to talk about
her. But I had to start somewhere. Charlie was the closest to a confidante that
I had. I’d pushed everyone else away. She was the perfect person to help me get
used to it. “Before her, I had never thought of settling down in any way. I
didn’t want marriage or kids. I wanted to play the field and do my thing. I
suppose finding that one person you know you’re supposed to be with changes
everything.”

She appeared thoughtful
for a moment. “Yeah, I suppose it would.”

A tiny flicker of hope grew
in the back of my mind. She didn’t seem as if she fully understood my
statement, and I took it as a great sign. Perhaps her relationship with her
boyfriend wasn’t as stable or serious as it appeared. If any of my suspicions
about him held any accuracy, I hoped she would see it before it was too late to
do anything about it. I also might have had a stray thought of her coming to
me, instead, but I quickly dismissed it as absolutely ridiculous. It couldn’t
happen for so many reasons.

Instead of continuing
the conversation and humoring my daydreams, I led her out to my car. I didn’t
want it to get more complicated than it had to be. I held the door open for her
and closed it behind her before walking around to the driver’s seat. The whole
way to the clinic, I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face. Everything had
finally been set in motion.

Chapter Nine

Charlie

My brain had predicted
the upcoming visit with the fertility specialist to be far more frightening
than it actually turned out to be. Imagine my surprise to find a friendly,
helpful, informative man in that office. When he walked in, Professor Mason
greeted him like an old friend. The warm smile the doctor offered me instantly
put me at ease.