False Regret: Pikorua - Book 1 (3 page)

“Tell
these men something, Ellia. This is your last chance,” said Donny. He silently
pleaded with me to answer.

“As
I’ve repeatedly told you people, I don’t know.  I swear I do not know anything
about my dad,” I openly sobbed, knowing that Donny could not help me.  No
doubt, they would kill him, as sure as they planned to murder me, if he didn’t
follow their orders. He raised his arm and back-handed my face, his knuckle
catching my lip and breaking the skin. Metallic tasting blood filled my mouth as
my body fell out of the chair again.  My skull smacked the table leg and the
world began to spin. I tried to sit up on my own, wanting to brace for what was
coming next, but I wasn’t able to, especially with my hands still tied. My head
ached so much I wanted to scream. Donny pulled me up and back into my wooden
seat; though not as roughly as Gordon had.

“Ellia,
you need to tell them something,” he repeated. Dazed, I remained silent.

“Hit
the bitch again,” Gordon told Donny. “Use your fist, ya pussy.”

I
watched him ball his hand, and I closed my eyes. There was a long pause as if
he was working up the nerve to hurt me again. The blow came to my chin, and it’s
the last thing I remembered until waking up on the icy, cement floor, with
every muscle screaming in protest.

 
I found myself in a dark room with the one eye swollen shut but no longer restrained
by the coarse rope. I sat up, slowly, letting my body adjust to the change in
position. My head throbbed, and I touched my painful face, wondering how much
damage Man-in-black had inflicted. My cheek and lip felt like my eye-socket,
doubled in size. Dried blood crusted around my mouth and chin, as well as in my
hair line. I wasn’t sure how long I’d been unconscious and alone.   

My
searching hands in the darkness discovered a metal structure.  The cabin had
been log, so I discerned the men had moved me somewhere new. Fumbling around, I
stumbled into a rake, narrowly missing a tong in my good eye when I fell on it.
After getting to my feet and shuffling along, I tripped over a lawn mower. It
became obvious I was in a shed. Sightless in the dark, I touched my way around
the perimeter, avoiding the gardening utensils of death, until I came to the
door.  Chains rattled as I pushed on it, but the padlocked door kept me
captive. I took my chances and yelled while beating on the metal building,
hoping that someone would hear my cries and rescue me. I doubted my captors had
housed me anywhere near civilization, the risk too great for discovery. Yet, I
screamed anyway, taking satisfaction in doing something.

Before
long, I had exhausted myself, and I fell to the hard cement floor. Despair
covered me like a cold blanket, and I curled up in a ball and cried, not
knowing what they had planned next. The temperature dropped as the deep night enveloped
the warm evening, and I shivered. The heat of the day had retreated to where it
belonged, and what it left behind chilled me to the core.  Sleep begged for me,
but the shivering wouldn’t ease up enough to let me doze off into a better
place. I needed to escape the shed, not take a nap, but it seemed hopeless, as
my rattled brain could not grasp any logical ideas of how to extract myself.

 The
chain clanked against the door. They were coming for me again.  Terror gripped
me, and a primal instinct made me want to hide. I moved around the structure
again, following the metal ridges with my hands, and crawled over the lawnmower
to disappear into a corner. The flashlight came through the door first,
scanning the shed. When it landed on me and steadied, I knew he had spotted me.
There was nowhere to hide in the small space. I could make out a black silhouette
behind the bright light, but I couldn’t discern which of my tormentors had returned
to inflict more pain. I held up my hand to shield my good eye from the blinding
beam.

“Ellia,”
the voice said. It was Man-in-black, the man they called, Donny. “I am sorry; I
wanted you to know that. I will do what I can to get you out of this, but you
need to tell them something. It doesn’t matter what. Make something up if you
need to; whatever will buy us time.” He approached me and moved the lawn mower.
I shielded my head with my arms and tried to fold myself small to protect my
body from him. “I don’t want to hurt you, don’t be afraid.” He covered me with
a warm blanket and set a bottle of water near my foot. “Just tell them
something so this can be over.”

“And
what happens when they find out I lied? I am guessing Mr. Dacks would be rather
pissed if I wasted his time with a fib. I really don’t have any idea where my
dad is. I swear to you, I don’t know.” My voice broke, and I started to cry
again, wanting the nightmare to end.

“I
believe you, but these guys are not fooling around. There is a lot of money at
stake here, and they will do whatever it takes to get their hands on it.  When
was the last time you talked to Sam?” he asked.

“How
do you know about Sam?” I was suddenly alert and scared again.

“Obviously,
if we found you, Ellia, we can find your brother and your mom,” Donny remained
calm as he answered my stupid question. Of course they would seek out my whole
family.

“Oh
my God, please tell me you didn’t hurt them.” Hysterics welled up, and the man
reached out and put his hand on my knee to quiet me. Instinctively, I backed
away, knocking a shovel over and taking the handle to my head.

“Take
it easy, Ellia,” he said in a soft voice. He tossed the tool aside. “I don’t have
information as to where they are or if anyone has them.  You need to understand,
though, that Gordon and I are not the only employees of Mr. Dacks; he has other
people out there. Do you think Sam or your Mom would have any information on
him?”

I
had no idea whether my family knew where my dad was or not.  I couldn’t bear these
men going after them based on something I said, though. My mother lived two
hours away, and my brother was in another state, altogether. None of us were
close anymore, and we never talked to each other about our own personal
relationships with my father. I didn’t know if either of them might have
knowledge of his comings and goings or not. I was done talking.  They would
have to kill me. I wouldn’t accidentally give them a reason to go after my
loved ones.

“Get
away. I am not talking to any of you. Beat me, rape me, murder me, do whatever
you want. No matter what I say, it’s wrong, anyway. Take your apology and your
pretense of caring, and shove it up your ass, DONNY!” I yelled at him. 

He
sighed and stood up. The light went with him as he neared the door. “Still as
stubborn as ever, I see. I hope you don’t regret that stance.”

 The
chain clanked a desolate song as he closed the door behind him. The lock smacked
onto the metal siding creating an echo as it fell in place. His last statement
confused me further. I wondered if I had met this man before.  An image finally
formed in my mind, taking my breath away. I remembered the person he reminded
me of, and the familiar black curtain fell in place, refusing to let my memory
go there. It was just too painful. I used to think I saw him everywhere in the
beginning, and now, as my stress levels rose, it was happening again. That
person died long ago, and a big part of me perished with him. Even now, after
so much time had passed, I still could not bring myself to think about him. I emotionally
shut down and closed my eyes, letting the darkness hide me from the pain that
nearly killed me.

I
woke the next morning to the jangle of the chain and the click of the lock. I’d
wrapped myself up in the warm blanket that Donny had given me and fallen asleep
at some point. The door flew open and sunlight poured in, along with the
freezing air, a big change from the previous day’s Indian summer. Not wanting to
face my abductors, I stayed under the coverlet and hid myself away. I didn’t
know which one had come for me.

“Get
up, skank,” said the voice of Camo-man. “We need to have another chat.” He
didn’t give me the chance to stand up on my own. He grabbed me by the hair and
yanked me to my feet, causing me to cry out in pain.

“Shut
up!” he barked as he dragged me outside the shed. We were still at the cabin.
Gordon pushed me towards the back door, and I tripped on a stick, falling to
the ground. “Clumsy bitch,” he said and kicked me in the tailbone with his
muddy work boot. I fell face first onto the frosty morning grass, scraping my
injured face in the dirt. Quickly, but with prudence, I picked myself up before
he kicked me again. He grabbed my upper arm, his dirty nails digging into my
flesh, and pushed me along with him.

We
quickened the pace as we crossed the yard. Forest blanketed the tiny lodge, and
there was no sign of neighbors or a real road. A rutted, dirt two-track ran in
front of the cabin and disappeared into the woods. Parked to the side were two
vehicles, the white work van, and a black suburban next to it. I figured Mr.
Dacks was waiting for me inside the shack.

Just
as we entered the door, I saw Donny first, and he pulled his ski mask over his
face again. I wondered why he cared anymore, none of the rest did. I already
knew they planned to kill me regardless of what I told them.

Gordon
pushed me down in the same chair I’d sat in the night prior. No one bothered to
tie me up again, apparently deciding I was too weak or too stupid to pose a
threat.

“Good
morning, young lady,” said Mr. Dacks. “I hope you slept well.” He laughed as if
he’d told a joke.  “Miss Meyers, you will be staying in our custody for some
time, so get used to living like a dog unless you cooperate. If you help us
with our quest, we can at least make your accommodations a little more
tolerable, but either way, we intend to keep you until we get what we want from
your daddy. You are our collateral, so to speak, until Chief Meyers returns the
money. And if he doesn’t … Well … Sorry, honey, but we will kill you.  For now,
you will remain a guest of Mr. Gordon and his partner, way out here in the big woods,
with no one to hear you scream. Things might get a little uncomfortable for
you. Mr. Gordon has expressed an interest in you, Ellia, something beyond our
common goal if you grasp what I am saying. You may wish to consider that when I
ask you one last time; where is your father? If you tell me the truth, I will
instruct these lads to leave you alone. They will treat you well, and then they
will release you, unharmed, when we locate your father.”

Even
with the threat of repeated rape and probably death on the line, I still didn’t
know where he was. Telling an untruth, as Donny suggested, was no longer an
option. They would keep me until they found him and extracted the information
they needed from him, anyway, so sending them on a wasted mission could
potentially prolong my imprisonment and torture. I remained quiet and stared at
Mr. Dacks.

“Is
this really how you want to play this, Ellia? I thought you were a smart girl.
I guess I was wrong.” He moved away and nodded at Gordon. 

Gordon,
still in his camo pants stood in front of me. “Stand up,” he ordered. I did as
told. I faced him with my chin set in defiance as I met his steely, blue eyes
with the iciest stare I could muster from my one good eye, and I waited for it.
His pale, thin lips curved into a half smile while punching me hard in the
stomach. The force knocked me off of my feet and stole every ounce of my
breath. I landed on the floor, curling myself into a ball. I stayed huddled,
knowing he wasn’t done with me. When Camo-man brought his steel toed boot down
on my hip with a crushing kick, I cried out in agony. The pain radiated from my
side through my entire pelvic girdle, and I worried he had broken something.

“That’s
enough,” said Donny, stepping in between Gordon and me. “She doesn’t know
anything. This is fucking pointless.  If you beat her to death, then what good
is she?”

“See
boss,” said Gordon to Dacks. “This fucker is soft. I told you he couldn’t
handle this shit.”

“I
can handle it just fine when it has purpose,” Donny retorted. “Beating her is
useless, and you getting your rocks off by hurting a defenseless woman who has
no information to barter, is just fucking sick. Back off Gordon.”  I heard the
serious menace in the Man-in-black’s tone.

“All
right, boys,” said Dacks. “Mr. Jeffries and I are going to take our leave. You
guys work it out between you. Whatever you decide to do with her is up to you,
but don’t kill her yet, Gordon. We may need her to get Meyers to talk. We’ll
see if the lying bastard has a soft spot for his little girl.” He laughed and
headed to the door where Mr. Jeffries, awaited him. To my relief, Gordon
followed the two men out. As soon as they were gone, Donny lifted me up and carefully
sat me on the old sofa.

“Are
you okay, Ellia?” he asked, and I could’ve sworn there was real concern in his
tone.

I
was crying again and in more pain than I’d ever known, at least physically. I
buried my face in my hands and didn’t respond to him. He pulled my palms away
from my battered face. “Are you okay? I need to know if you can handle this for
a little longer. I promise you, I won’t let it get much worse than this, but if
you can’t take it, you need to tell me.”

I
was beyond confused by his statement. “What are you talking about? Of course I
am not okay. I have been abducted and beaten up, how can I be okay? Who are
you? What the hell is going on?” I sat up and stared into his eyes, those eyes
that reminded me so much of someone I’d lost. Gordon walked in at that moment,
and Donny held his finger to his mouth, indicating for me to be quiet.

“What
the fuck, boy? Leave that lying cunt on the floor where she belongs.” He walked
over and grabbed me by a lock of hair and forced me to the floor. “Stay on the
floor like a good bitch,” he said, and walked into the kitchen area. Donny
didn’t say anything or help me back onto the furniture. I curled up in a ball
and stayed down where I belonged. My hip throbbed, and my stomach felt riotous,
even though I hadn’t anything since lunch the day prior. Donny pulled a chair
out from the table and sat down, maintaining watch on Gordon. 

The
smell of Gordon’s invention on the stove made my stomach twist in both desire
and revulsion. It was sausage and eggs. When he put the plate on the floor in
front of me, I made no response. My stomach growled, but I was sore from the
punch and didn’t want to eat anything that man cooked. I deliberately pushed the
plate away, making a point in my own little way. The men ate in silence. Donny
pulled his mask up enough to expose his mouth to eat, but he still didn’t
remove it. When Camo-man was finished he walked over to me. “Get up and eat
this food I cooked for you, you ungrateful bitch.”

“I’m
not hungry,” I said. “I don’t want your food.”

“Is
that right? Well, we’ll see about that in a couple of days won’t we?” He
grabbed me up off the floor and dragged me out the back door. He tossed me violently
back into the shed. My bare knees hit the cement slab with a skid, tearing off
the skin. The doors slammed shut, and I heard the lock set in place. I felt
around the dark shed until I came upon my nesting place in the corner. I sipped
the water Donny left for me, and then I curled into the blanket.

I
wondered if Matt, or any of my co-workers, were looking for me yet.  When I
didn’t show up for work, somebody must have worried. But then again, maybe not.
I entertained doubts anyone but Matt would look for me. I’d lived many years
with few relationships. The fear of losing someone kept me from forming deep
attachments to anyone.  I knew there was little chance Matt would find me,
anyway. No one even knew I went for a run in the park, the downfall of living
my life mostly alone. I didn’t check in with anyone, and there was no one to
account for me. Matt had asked me to move in several times, but after six
months, I just wasn’t ready for that kind of commitment, let alone marriage.
Allowing myself to even get into a relationship was monumental. Until I met
him, I believed my heart was forever frozen after Cade died, and I was okay
with that.  Matt, through his diligence and unwavering pursuit of me, found his
way in, though. He was good, kind, and patient, but he wasn’t Cade. No one
could ever take Cade’s place inside me.  I sucked in my breath, the emotion
like a hot poker to my gut. I buried him long ago, figuratively and literally.
Ten years had passed since he died, but it still felt like a vise on my heart
when I let a thought of him steal its way inside my consciousness. On the
occasion he walked through my dreams, I would wake up in the midst of wailing
sobs that only forceful extraction of the memories would resolve.

As
always, I brushed the thoughts and memories of him away from mind. If I let
them in, the result would be debilitating emotions that would cripple my
ability to think about anything else. I needed to focus on how to get out of my
current predicament.

 I
pondered Donny’s words and grasped my escape hinged on him. If I admitted that
I couldn’t take anymore, he’d get me out. He’d said as much. It didn’t make any
sense to me. Why did he care one way or the other, and why was he leaving it up
to me? Of course I wanted him to get me out. Why should I endure the abuse? I
truly didn’t know where my father was or how he was tied up in their business. I
didn’t give a shit, either. It had nothing to do with my life. I didn’t want to
see my dad get hurt or killed, but this was his world, not mine. He accepted
the risks when he became a cop, or a criminal, and I shouldn’t be the one to
suffer for his decisions.  A familiar anger towards my sperm donor bubbled
inside me.

 I
searched my options, not wanting to rely on or trust Donny. It might be a trap.
He might be playing me to extract information by gaining my confidence. No … I
had to escape on my own.  I assessed and reassessed my situation, but there was
no way out of the shed with its cement floor and metal walls that were bolted
to the concrete.

My
mind finally devised a scenario that had little chance or working, but I was
desperate. Only one of them ever retrieved me at a time. I’d wait inside the
door and then clobber whoever showed up with the shovel. After that, I had two
choices, and I hoped we were not as far from civilization as we seemed to be. I
would either run through the woods where I risked being indefinitely lost or
dying of exposure in the vast northern state lands, or I’d have to subdue the
one left in the house to obtain the keys to the van.  It was the best plan I
could imagine, but there were definitely flaws. The downfalls and potential
things that might go wrong were endless, but according to Gordon, I’d be locked
in the shed a couple of days, at least, to ponder it.

Exhausted
by the nonstop reverie in my mind, I fell asleep. Sometime later, I woke up
shivering to the sound of the chain. The door opened to the black silhouette of
Donny. It was nearly dark, and I was surprised I’d slept the entire day away. My
heart dropped, knowing I had missed my chance to ambush him.

“Ellia,”
he said coming in. He closed the door behind him and lit a lantern.  He sat
himself next to me with a plate of food. “You need to eat. It’s important to
stay healthy and strong.”

“Why?
What difference does it make? You and your people are just going to kill me in
the end.  Yours is the only face I haven’t seen. I am not stupid; there is no
way out of this for me,” I said.

“I
told you that I’ll protect you,” he offered.

“Ha!
You have done a hell of a good job so far, asshole. You even hit me yourself.
Why should I believe a damn word you say? Why do you care, anyway? This is obviously
your occupation, so why should I trust you?” I backed away from him and refused
his food.

“Dammit,
Ellia, I don’t want to tell you the truth because you have to appear afraid. I
need you to play along, but I won’t let them kill you or permanently scar you
in any way.”

“But
you will allow them to beat the fuck out of me and participate yourself, right?
What about rape? Is that going to be okay as long as there are no physical
scars? Do you plan to join in on that as well? How is any of this all right in
your world? Jesus, I am one woman against both of you. Am I supposed to just sit
here and take it like a good girl?  What truth is there to tell? What the hell
is happening here? Who are you?”

He
exhaled in exasperation and pulled the ski mask off his face. Seeing his dimly
lit face, I nearly screamed. I stood up and backed into the corner even farther.
 My nerves were on fire, yet I shivered as if coated in ice.

“No
... Oh my God ... No, it can’t be. You died ... You died when you got shot. Oh
my God, Cade? Is this some sick game?  It can’t be you!” I fainted.

When
I came to, Cade held me in his lap. I was sure it was a dream, and I basked in
it momentarily, wanting to pull him to me and drown in his life force. The last
time I’d seen him, I was seventeen years old. This Cade was older and taller now,
his tattoos changed, his voice deeper, but his eyes were the same, though
lacking the warmth that had always been an intricate part of who he had been. He
definitely wasn’t the same person that I had loved more than life itself, my first
love, my first everything. This man, this lying violent male, was someone
completely foreign, yet he stroked my hair tenderly, like he used to when we
were love-struck teenagers. My heart wanted to melt into a pool at the bottom
of my chest, but I wouldn’t let that happen. A hard lump froze in place
instead, and I sat up, pushing myself away from him. I got to my feet and stumbled
back into the corner again. I felt dizzy and sick as reality pounced on me.
How
can he be alive? How can he be here? Why did he hurt me so much?