Everything Changes (19 page)

Parker smiled politely, still looking me in the
eyes. The whole situation was overwhelming. Every second his lips were against
my skin helped my nerves, but it also made my temperature rise and my passion
for him peak even more.

He moved his hand from my face down between us,
and I knew what he was doing. Parker put his head at my ear, kissing the lobe.
“I don’t exactly have much control…you first.”

It took longer than I wanted it to, probably from
all our fumbling limbs and shaking, but with my hands clinging desperately to
his shoulders and his soft panting in my ear and the passionate kisses, I
reached an orgasm just from his gentle touch.

When I gasped, frantically pulling at him to rest
between my legs, he chuckled softly.

And then he was there, entering me again. It
still hurt. The tightness made it uncomfortable, but it wasn’t as bad as the
first and second time.

After a little more hair pulling and a cramp here
and there, we had matched our pace, coming in sync with breaths and movements.
My legs wrapped around his waist, my fingers digging into his skin as his hips
languidly moved with mine. His hands curled under and over my shoulders,
pulling me into his body.

Then he started to pull away, stopping. I
panicked thinking I was doing something wrong. “What’s wrong?”

He laughed under his breath. “I just…need to calm
down for a minute.” His voice was rough and his body trembled while he tried to
control himself.

With another low laugh and flushed cheeks, he
slowly continued kissing me. I wasn’t sure if I should move or just lay there,
but at some point my body relaxed. Not completely because it still wasn’t
comfortable, but it wasn’t burning as bad. Eventually, I tried to move my hips
with each rocking motion he made but then his breathing turned to panting, and
I knew what was about to happen.

 
“Fuck…” He
grunted in my ear, throaty and sexy. “I’m sorry…” His voiced faded and his
hands moved to my hips. Urgent movements took over, and I felt the swell of him
between my legs, his body trembling. His kiss moved to my lips, and I swallowed
his grunts of pleasure.

After his body stopped shaking, his breathing
remained the same. “Christ…I’m sorry...”

I wasn’t sure what to say so I smiled.

“I’m really sorry,” Parker said, smiling against
my lips, his heavy breathing starting to slow. He tried to move. Maybe he could
tell I was being squashed, and then his hand trapped my hair again. “Fuck…see!”

“That’s okay. I’m fine.” I tried to move too, and
then I lifted my leg right into his junk.

“Goddamn it!”

Yeah, we sucked at this.

I jumped when he yelled and clutched his junk.

While he tried to get his bearings back, I stayed
still. Flat on my back, I didn’t move as Parker held himself raised above me on
his knees. It was a sexy sight. His head bent forward, his muscles tensed, and
his body shook with a low, painful laugh.

He grinned, still in pain, and looked up at me.
“I hope we get this right someday.”

Throwing my arms over my face, I tried to hide
the flushed cheeks, my own laughter low.

Collapsing beside me after he removed the condom,
we lay there next to each other as our laughs and heaving breathing calmed.
Gradually, the laughter faded and I stroked my hand down his arm. He stirred,
lifting his head to place his cheek against my shoulder. He pressed a kiss to
my skin before groaning.

His knuckles from one hand brushed gently down my
arm. “Ro...” His buttery tone was a bit gritty and rough, and it was because of
me which made me smile. He had to clear his throat and shifted to the side to
face me. His arm settled into the curve of my waist when I turned to face him.
The fingers of his other hand traced my lips.

I leaned up and gently kissed his lips. My lips
lingered wanting to memorize the feel of his skin on mine. I never imagined I
would feel anything like this, and now here we were. Though awkward at times,
this was right.

His eyes searched mine for a second, and
apparently what he saw was amusing to him because he smiled. “Was your first
kiss this awkward?”

“You were my first kiss.”

Parker’s chest shook with laughter. “That was not
your first kiss.”

“I know.” I blinked and he smiled again. “But it
was the first good one.”

“Oh, well that makes me feel better.” His hands
found my back and he stroked it gently. He started to giggle at the expression
on my face.

“When was your first kiss?”

Parker held me a little tighter as I snuggled
into his chest. “Sixth grade,” he mused.

I couldn’t help but laugh. “Of course it was.
Cute little Parker probably had all the girls.”

“She was older too, a seventh grader,” he
continued.

“So scandalous.”

“She attacked me after I won a BMX race.” He
laughed. “Changed my life.”

“The kiss or the race?”

“
Mmmm
…the kiss,” he
teased.

I lifted my head and shoved his chest a bit.
“Shut up,” I said, wanting to put an end to the talk about his life changing
kiss.

When I looked at him, his eyes were light and his
smile showed the adorable side I fell for this last week. “Hey, I’m just
saying...” He wagged his brows at me playfully.

This side of him, the side that had me barely
saying a word to him for the past few months to getting naked in his arms was
why I felt so comfortable around him.

I reached my hand out and ran my fingers through
his damp waves. “No more talk about other girls.” I laughed, and when my laugh
faded, it got quiet. It was as if there was nothing left to say, or neither of
us wanted to say more.

Instead, we enjoyed our awkward love.

“Do you want to take a shower or something?” he
asked, looking over at me.

“Yeah.”

Parker nodded and then tossed me his T-shirt that
was next to the bed. I slipped it on and followed him to the bathroom. The
coldness and quiet of the room hit me when he was gone. He stepped out to get
us some water and said he’d be right back.

That was when the throbbing between my legs, the
dull ache, and the pain hit me. All the activity down there had made me sore.

My hand trembled when I reached for the knob on
the shower, and I couldn’t control it enough to get the temperature right.

“Damn it.” I hissed under my breath, fumbling
with it.

A warm, steady hand wrapped over mine. “Here,” he
said. “It’s a little tricky sometimes.”

As the water flowed, the towel I had wrapped
around me fell to the tile floor, and I noticed he was standing in front of me
completely naked.

Parker reached for me, noticing my shaking, and
wrapped his arms around me to stop the shaking. We got inside the shower to get
warm. I could feel his scruffy chin scrape against my shoulder and smiled. He
was nuzzling me again. It was cute.

We pulled apart when the water got too hot.
“Shit, sorry,” he said, scrambling to adjust it. “It’s either too cold or too
hot.”

When he turned around, I saw the worry in his
blue eyes.

His apprehension made me want to look down, but I
wasn’t ready to. Until now, I hadn’t got that great a view of him.
 
We were both bare, wet, and examining each
other under the spray of the shower.

When he saw me staring at his face, his lips
pulled into a smile. I felt comfortable when he looked at me like that, and my
heart rate slowed, my strange fears and insecurities giving way to my
happiness. I was giddy over the fact that I was with him, naked in a shower,
when just a few weeks ago we hadn’t so much as said one word to each other.

It was strange to even think about it, but
somehow it was true. I was with him. Since Parker arrived at my dad’s shop, I
felt like he was mine. Something drew me towards him and made me feel
comfortable. In just a few short weeks everything changed and here we were,
naked, staring at each other.

“You okay?” he asked.

“Yep,” I said, sort of giddy, sort of nervous.

The corner of his mouth pulled into a smile. “You
look nervous.”

“I’m not…okay maybe a little…” my smile rose
“...but I’m strangely comfortable too.”

“I know what you mean.” Parker’s eyes shifted
from mine, drifting lower.

My heart rate picked up again as I watched him
take me in. I couldn’t help but feel good about the look in his eyes. It was
that sleepy, hooded, hungry look. It was the one that gave me confidence.

I tried to be discreet as I lowered my gaze.

He noticed and smiled. My pulse sounded like a
drum beat.

And then he moved even closer. He wanted me to
take a closer look.
 
It wasn’t exactly
pretty but it looked a lot nicer than the ones I’d seen in health class. He was
hard again and it hit his bellybutton.

Then I had this overwhelming urge to do it again.

Parker closed his eyes when my hand gripped him,
but he stopped me. “That’s probably a bad idea in here,” he said, his cheeks
pink from the steamy shower.

I squeezed my fist a little harder. “Why?” I
asked, nudging forward so we were fully touching. His hands went to wrap around
my back.

Parker didn’t move. He stayed where he was.
“Because I pulled your hair, and you punched my junk with your knee. It still
hurts and we could really hurt ourselves in here,” he said, his brow furrowing
in both distress and pleasure.

I loosened my hand and slid it up his chest to
touch his cheek, and then he opened his beautiful blue eyes.

Now that he mentioned it, it was a bad idea.
“You’re probably right.”

Parker laughed, lightly kissing my forehead.
“Believe me, I want to...but I don’t want to hurt you any more than I have
already.”

I knew he was referring to our first time, and
then I knew he saw the blood too. I rolled my eyes. “It’s okay. It’s starting to
get better.”

“Yeah?” You couldn’t miss the excitement in his
voice.

We both ended up laughing, and before I knew it,
he was rushing through the shower to get me back in his room. I wasn’t lying;
it was starting to feel better. Parker was all about practice after that.

July 6,
1997

The next day I was entirely too sore for
anything. Thankfully, we were in the car most of the day because I had no
energy for anything. I felt good about that too. It was a good sore because the
reason I was sore made me grin like a fool any time I thought about it. Every
time I moved, I winced and Parker’s cheeks would flush. I added his flushing
cheeks to all the things I found adorable about him.

The eleven-hour drive to Anaheim was nothing
compared to what it was like when we actually arrived in Anaheim.

The sticks from the party were everywhere, and my
nerves were all over the place.

Addy
and
me, yeah, we felt very out of place once we got there. I think Parker and
Justin sensed that, and they tried to make us feel comfortable, but it wasn’t
working.

“Do you think they can breathe in those clothes?”
Addy
asked with a snicker as we sat by the pool at
Lucy Johnson’s house. Lucy was cool, even for being Justin’s ex-girlfriend…she
was still cool.

“You two are just as cute as can be,” she told
us, sitting next to us in a lounge chair. Her towel was wrapped high around
under her armpits. She adjusted it and looked over her shoulder at Justin,
Parker, and their friend Kurt who were wrestling around in the water. “You guys
are good for them. It’s nice to see them happy.”

Addy
was
the first to respond. “Were they not this happy before?”

“They hide it well…but no, I could tell.” Lucy
leaned back in the chair and propped her perfectly manicured feet up. “Parker
took it the hardest, but he’s come a long way from when I saw him at Christmas
to now.”

We all laughed when Parker let out this adorable
giggle at something he apparently thought was the funniest thing he’d ever
heard from Kurt.

Kurt Henning seemed like a good person. From what
I learned, he was born and raised here in California. He was the same age as
Parker and probably one of his best friends since he lived next door to him. I
liked Kurt immediately when another girl, Amber, said, “Wow, Parker grew up.”
She eyed him as though he was her personal candy cane.

Kurt smiled at me and looked at Amber. “And have
you met his girlfriend, Rowan?”

Like I said, I liked Kurt.

As
Addy
and I sat there
talking with Lucy that afternoon, the barbeque got into full swing and it began
to resemble the fourth of July party when most of the same people began to show
up, including Kayla.

I didn’t think Kayla liked me, and she definitely
didn’t like Kurt.