Dangerous (16 page)

Ryan

The door swung open and I came face-to-face with Julia. I don’t think I’d even had a conversation with the woman up to that point, and here she was looking at me like I’d just skinned her kittens. I looked over her shoulder and saw that Amy was standing behind her. She stepped backward—a slight movement, but one that was obvious to me. My heart sank.

She knows.

I tried to reason with myself. How the hell could she possibly have known? She was an accountant, not a private detective. And I kept my nose clean. Like, really. There were tax collectors who appeared shadier than I did.

I stared in her eyes looking for some kind of light; some trace of humor. But there was nothing. All I saw was fear and darkness. I took a step forward, but Julia moved quickly and tried to close the door in my face. I moved my foot to block it and tried to ignore the pain as she closed it anyway.

Yup. There was no doubt in my mind now. They knew.

“Amy,” I said through the crack in the door, keeping my voice as calm as I could.

“You’ve got ten seconds to leave,” she snapped.

My heart somersaulted then; a kaleidoscope of emotions. On the one hand, by not mentioning them she’d just confirmed to me that the cops weren’t on the way. I didn’t need their interference, not then. On the other, I felt a surge of protectiveness so strong it almost knocked me over. She sounded so afraid; so lost. I leaned against the doorjamb, hating myself more than I’d ever hated anyone in my life.

Walk away.

But I couldn’t. Say I walked away; then what? That would only give him free reign to come and attack her at his leisure? No. I couldn’t do that. I glanced up. I could barely see her through the door—Julia was blocking her completely.

“I said—”

“I heard what you said,” I said miserably.

Julia turned back to Amy and I heard them fiercely debate something. Their voices were too low for me to hear what they were saying. But I had a feeling it was something along the lines of ‘Ryan is a fucking asshole, call the cops now.’

I couldn’t believe I was in that situation. Did she have any idea how much danger she was in? I balled my fist and made to slam the door, stopping myself when I was mere inches from crashing through it. That wasn’t a good idea, I knew, to allow her to see my anger. But I couldn’t help it.

I’d been trying to hide it for so long, but I couldn’t pretend to myself anymore. I cared about this girl. I cared about her more than I’d ever cared about anyone.

“How do you know him?”

I glanced up in astonishment. The pressure on my foot hadn’t eased, but it was Amy who stood against the crack of the door, not Julia.

She pushed against the door, trapping my foot between the door and its frame.

I pushed against it half-heartedly. It was taking most of my concentration to try and work out what the fuck was going on in my mind. If I’d wanted to open that door? It would have taken five men to stop me. But I couldn’t. There was a reason why I was glad to be the one the Soldier had come to, even though it tore me up inside—I was going to make this as quick and painless as possible. She wasn’t going to feel fear at my hands.

She pushed back, groaning with the exertion. I felt my heart tug when I heard her soft groan. It sent me straight back to my bedroom; to long mornings spent seeing how long I could tease her with my tongue before she went crazy with frustration. My heart cried out for one more moment like that; even just a minute. It felt like a long time ago now.

“Let me in, Amy,” I said, as calmly as possible.

Did I feel like an asshole for trying to make her feel like everything was okay? Of course I did. But I didn’t exactly have a choice. The truth wasn’t an option now.

“No. You’re not coming in here,” she said, pushing back against me.

Rage swelled up inside me then. Why was it that he could click his fingers and in that instant destroy two lives? Even if I gave her an easy way out, I’d never get over it. Never. Looking at her then, her face sweating from the exertion of keeping me out; her hair plastered to her face. Even then she was beautiful.

I eased off the pressure. The door slammed against my foot again, but this time I barely felt the pain.

I couldn’t do it.

I couldn’t.

Without another word, I pulled my foot out. This was all wrong—everything about the situation. I needed to take a step away and calm the fuck down. Sure I didn’t have time for that, but I had no choice. This was the most important job of my life—and I couldn’t afford to do a sloppy job.

Ryan

I walked along the corridor, my brain racing and fuzzy as if I’d just come down with some rare tropical fever. I wish I had—whatever it was, it was likely to be a whole lot less deadly than the situation I found myself in now.

I’d never failed to complete a job.

Never.

No matter how dangerous the target; no matter how impossible. I was the guy who got shit done; the one you could call in a crisis.

I glanced down at my pale, shaking hands. If any of my associates saw me like this…

I’d failed. I’d been hired to kill a woman—one woman, with no military training. With no protection bar her friend and a hollow door I could have knocked down in seconds. I shook my head as I strode along the corridor and away from her. I saw it clearly now. She had the best defenses money could buy in this situation. She had my heart.

I buried my head in my hands, trying and failing to see how the fuck that wasn’t a death sentence for the two of us. Sure, I’d convinced myself I was doing the humane thing and doing the job myself. But I couldn’t do it. There was no way I could kill Amy.

No. Way.

So I needed a plan.

I rested my head against the bricks; they were cool against my over-loaded head. I had twenty hours tops, and that was only if the Soldier didn’t grow suspicious or skeptical and send someone else to do the job. For all I knew, he had someone waiting outside right now.

I still didn’t know what I was going to do; my body made the decision for me. I pushed away from the wall and strode back along the corridor to Julia’s apartment.

I banged the door again, holding my palm over the peephole.

“Go away,” said a muffled voice on the other side.

My heart hammered in my throat. “Amy. Just hear me out.”

I had no idea what I was going to say—I wasn’t the kinda guy who expressed feelings other than hunger and thirst. I didn’t even have words to describe what I was feeling right then. But the Soldier’s deadline kept me glued to that door. I could go away and think about what I wanted to say, but Amy might be killed in the meantime.

“Amy,” I said, knocking sharply on the door again. “I
really
need to talk to you.”

The door opened a crack. My stomach plummeted at the sight of her tear-stained face. My fault, I knew. But tears were better than the other option.

“Please go,” she whispered. “I thought you’d gone already.”

I shook my head. “I did, but…”

She started to close the door again and my mind raced. I could stall and keep it civil; wrap her in cotton wool and pretend like I wasn’t the big bad wolf. I might finally be able to talk her round after hours of dancing around the truth. But at what price?

I pushed against the door, taking her by surprise. I stepped inside and slammed the door closed behind me. Amy was backed against the wall, where she’d fallen from the force of my blow to the door.

She looked at me incredulously. Then her face fell. “I didn’t…

Julia stepped forward, as if she was about to stand in front of Amy. I held my hand out and shook my head. “Don’t do anything stupid.”

Amy opened her mouth to speak. I didn’t give her a chance.

“I need to talk to you. You’re in danger.”

She shook her head, the color in her face draining away.

“We can see that,” Julia said, narrowing her eyes.

Amy shook her head. “Let him speak. We don’t have much of a choice, remember?”

I frowned, momentarily surprised. I hadn’t expected her to hear me out that easily. “What do you mean?”

She smiled bitterly. “Don’t pretend like you don’t know. I’m not stupid. I saw you with him. What were you doing with him?”

My stomach plummeted. So she knew. I’d suspected it, but to hear her say it; her eyes cold and full of suspicion.

“It’s a long story.”

“So’s mine.”

My eyes widened. “So you remembered?”

She nodded. “Everything,” she said bitterly.

I was silent, processing. I didn’t know the whole story, just what I’d been able to piece together from both sides. I wanted to ask her all about it—how she found out. How long they’d been together. What the fuck she was doing with an asshole like him. But we didn’t have time for that now.

“We need to get out of here.”

She shook her head. “No. I’m not going to be pushed around like an idiot anymore.”

I frowned, trying to keep myself calm. I could have picked her up and carried her out, but I couldn’t take that risk. She was bound to make a scene and I couldn’t risk someone calling the cops. That reminded me of something else.

“You didn’t call the cops?”

She shook her head, a smile playing at her lips. “No. Of course not. Why would I walk right into his psycho killer arms like that?”

I swallowed, feeling an irrational amount of relief that she at least had an inkling of the level of danger she was dealing with here.

“Good,” I nodded. “Good.”

She shook her head. “Like you’re any better,” she muttered.

I let the rebuke slide. What was I gonna do? Argue that I was better? Sure, I hated the sonofabitch, but that didn’t make me an angel.

“Amy,” I said slowly. “I understand if you hate me. That’s fine. But please listen to me. I need to get you out of here.”

“I told you,” she said, slowly pronouncing each word with cold precision. “I’m not going to be pushed around like an idiot. How do you know him?”

I rubbed my face. This was the part I wasn’t prepared for. How in the hell could I even begin to explain? I’d already accepted the fact that she was going to hate me forever. But I’d give anything for that to happen—it would mean I’d succeeded in keeping her alive. So what was the point in holding back?

My stupid heart was getting in the way, telling myself I still had a chance with her. I wished it would fuck off back to wherever it had been hiding for the last ten years.

“He called an associate of mine.”

She raised an eyebrow.

I shook my head. I felt more frightened than I ever had in my life. I’d faced down armed men and been less scared than I was right then, with the woman I loved looking at me like I was some kind of monster. I had to say I was thankful for the Soldier’s influence over the cops right then—if it hadn’t been for that, I knew, there would have been no way she’d even be speaking to me.

“You know who he is?”

She laughed sadly. “I remember everything. Right after I saw you with him… I guess the weirdness of the situation triggered something in my brain. It needed me to know I was in danger.”

My heart sank, but there was no denying it. She had it right. I was a threat. “You saw something.”

She nodded. “I saw him kill some guy. Right there in our apartment.”

I took a sharp intake of breath. What a fucking idiot to mess things up with a woman like her.

“Ryan,” she said quietly. “Tell me the truth. Please.”

I swallowed. That was it. My worst nightmare come true. But it was a relief in a way. I was tired of lying to her.

“He hired me to kill you.”

Her face literally fell. She took a step forward, as if she was going to rush out the door.

“Wait. Hear me out. Please.”

“What, before you kill me?”

My pulse buzzed in my ears.

“Amy,” I said slowly. “If I wanted to kill you, I would have done it already without drawing it out like this.”

She looked at me stunned.

“It’s true. That’s what I came here to do. But I couldn’t. I love you, Amy.”

Her lovely face was screwed up with skepticism.

I ran my hand over my head; it was stubbly—I hadn’t shaved in two days. I’d been too busy worrying about her. And we weren’t safe yet. She was still staring at me uncomprehending.

“I don’t expect you to do anything but hate me. But Amy, please. I need to get you out of here. When he finds out I didn’t do the job he’ll send others.”

She shook her head. “I don’t… This is all too fucked up.”

She looked so lost. Every instinct I had screamed at me to take her in my arms and comfort her. But I was the last person whose comfort she wanted, I knew. I clenched my fists by my sides to distract myself.

“I know this is confusing,” I said, as levelly as I could. “And I’ll explain everything. But right now…”

“Was it… Is that why you were hanging around in the bar? You knew?”

I shook my head, horrified that she’d think that. “No, of course not.” Not being able to take her in my arms was killing me, it really was. But I needed her to walk out of there beside me, and to do it before it was too late.

“You expect me to believe that?”

I shook my head miserably. “I don’t expect you to believe anything. Just that if I don’t get you out of here soon…”

“If it wasn’t a setup, why did he go to you? How did he know?”

I shook my head. “That’s kind of my area of expertise,” I said, my voice barely louder than a whisper.

Her eyes widened. “You’re some kind of… hitman?” she glanced up at me, obviously not believing it still.

I closed my eyes. It hurt to hear her say that. I’d never wanted her to find out. “Yes.”

“So he asked you to get rid of his little problem. And it just so happened that you knew me already.”

“Amy, we need to—”

“Answer me,” she snapped.

“Yes. He hired me. I wasn’t expecting… When I saw it was you it broke my heart. But I knew what he was like.”

“You work together.”

“No. No, no, no. I’d never met him before. I’d heard of him. He’s not somebody you want to fuck with. Which is why I need to get you out of here.”

“He doesn’t know I’m here.”

I rolled my eyes. “You serious? You don’t think he’s capable of finding you?”

“But he never showed much interest in hanging out with Julia. He probably doesn’t know her name. He certainly doesn’t know where she lives.”

I took a deep breath. “Amy. You don’t understand. The Soldier. Ben. He’s one of the most dangerous men in this city.”

She shivered and I immediately regretted saying that. “Sorry.”

She shrugged. “Don’t be. I’ve got fucking terrible taste in guys. I know that.”

I had to fight not to laugh. I admired that about her—it was one of the many things I liked. She could keep her sense of humor, even in times like this when she must have been frightened to death.

She glared at me and I looked away. God, I could scarcely see how we get out of this alive, let alone how I’d convince her to be with me afterward. But it was what I wanted more than anything else in the world.

“The short version, Amy? He’s dangerous. Fucking dangerous. And you know what? I’m glad it was me he offered the contract to. Because if it wasn’t, you’d be dead by now.”

Amy seemed to shrink away; to fall into herself. Julia stepped closer and put her arm around her. I resented that. I wanted it to be me she looked to for comfort. But right then, to her, I was no better than her asshole ex-boyfriend. And if I spent any more time trying to convince her otherwise, we’d both be dead.

“I’m sorry for scaring you, but we’ve got to get away. Now.”

“I’m not going anywhere with you.”

“Amy.” I stood and moved closer to her.

“Stop. Enough,” Julia said, standing between us. “Enough drama for one day.”

I snorted. “Drama? You call this drama? It’ll be horror before the day is out. The minute—no the second—the Soldier suspects I haven’t done the job, he’ll be here.”

Amy shivered.

Julia glanced at her, then took a step closer to where I stood. “Get. Out. I don’t want you here anymore. You’re upsetting her.”

I looked from one to the other. I hadn’t wanted to take her by force, but it looked like I was going to be left with no choice. Who cared if she hated me for the rest of her life? At least I wouldn’t have another grave to visit.

Just before I stepped forward to grab her, she spoke. Her voice was lower, smaller than usual. “Wait. Stop. Let him finish.”

I stepped back, more relieved than I could say that I hadn’t had to break her trust. Well, what little of it she had left in me.

“Please come with me. We need to disappear. Right now.”

“How do I know…”

I reached around my back and pulled out my Beretta. “Here. Take this.”

She looked at it like I’d just handed her a live grenade. “You know how to use this?”

She shook her head. “But you said we have time,” she said in a weak voice.

I nodded. “Yeah. We do. Not much, though.”

I took the pistol from her and showed her how to disengage the safety.

“You’re saying I’ll need to shoot this?”

“No,” I said through my teeth. “I’m saying that if giving you this gun is the only thing that’ll convince you to come with me, then you can have it. Will you come with me now?”