Wednesday (Timeless Series #3) (13 page)

Broken

Hawke

My life was complete shit.

It passed slowly, like a bad dream that just wouldn’t end. I prayed for the next thing to look forward to—the sweet release of death.

My company was doing better than ever, and I just hired five more guys for the office. My father was gone and I didn’t have to deal with his shit anymore. And now that my mother had passed, I didn’t have to worry about her dying anymore—because it already happened.

I was angry all the time, at nothing in particular. Weeks passed but that ferocity never diminished. Francesca came into my mind every day, and when I remembered the way I treated her, I hated myself more.

Why don’t I just kill myself and be done with it?

Axel met me at our usual bar after work. He was still in his suit just as I was. We never spoke of Francesca or what happened between us. His resentment was still clear in his look sometimes, like he’d never truly forgive me for leaving her a second time.

I didn’t blame him.

“How’s the money life?” he asked as he slid into the booth.

Meaningless. “Good. What about you?”

He waved down the waitress and ordered a beer. “I like my job and everything but I hate having a boss. They suck.”

“They do.” I was pretty terrible.

“What are you doing this weekend?”

Something I’d been dreading for a long time. “I have to head back to South Carolina…gather my mom’s things and figure out what to do with them.” I’d been putting it off as long as possible. I didn’t want to be in that house with her ghost. I didn’t want to look at the closet I’d been locked up in. The bat that broke my ribs in eighth grade was probably still tucked under the bed.

“Oh…” He fingered the handle of his glass.

“I’ve put it off too long. It needs to get done.”

“Well, if you need any help, let me know.”

I appreciated the offer but couldn’t subject anyone to that torture. The only person who would offer because they genuinely wanted to be there was Francesca—but I couldn’t ask her for anything.

Despite my constant state of ferocity, the softer side of me slowly began to emerge. I thought about Francesca every night before I went to sleep, wondering what she was doing and if she was sleeping alone. Her scent was all over my apartment, even after all this time later. I thought I did the right thing when I let her go, but now I started to question everything.

I assumed I would go back to my old ways once we were done, but I hadn’t. I hadn’t slept with anyone or even made the attempt. Women made passes at me the second I was available and plenty of offers were on the table.

But I couldn’t do it.

The past six months had been nothing but lonely. I spent most of my time alone, and when I was in my apartment, all I did was sulk. I blamed my father for robbing me of everything that ever mattered. First, he took my mother. And then he took my innocence. I couldn’t be with the one woman who mattered because I would hurt her.

I was a beast.

When she tried to stop me from killing him, I wanted to shove her as hard as I could. When she exposed her neck to me, I wanted to break it. The violent tendencies overtook me, and it was a miracle I didn’t give in to the weakness.

If we were still together, she’d probably be dead by now.

***

I didn’t want to pack up my mom’s things alone. I was a grown man that was invincible to everything, but I was still intimidated by the four walls I used to be surrounded by. There was one person who could battle the front with me because she wasn’t scared of anything.

But I kicked her out of my life for good.

The last conversation we had in my apartment was brutal. I was out of my mind with rage, and I took it out on her. Desperate to push her away, I did whatever was necessary to get her to leave.

Then she did.

Before I left for South Carolina, I walked to her apartment and stood in front of her door. It was stupid for me to go there but I couldn’t help it. My legs automatically took me there, and my heart also had a hand in it.

I stared at the wood and released a deep sigh, knowing how this conversation was going to go. We hadn’t seen each other in six months. The second I asked for help, she would turn me down—and she should.

I knocked.

Footsteps sounded on the other side, and then the door opened. A man in his late forties stood there. He had a bushy mustache and black beady eyes. “Whatever you’re selling, I’m not buying.”

“Francesca doesn’t live her, by chance?”

“I don’t know who you’re talking about. But I just moved in a few months ago.”

She moved? I had no idea.  “I’m sorry to have bothered you.” I darted down the hallway with my head bowed. She moved and I didn’t even know about that. How did I miss that?

What else in her life had changed?

First Date

Francesca

He knocked on the door right at seven.

I checked my hair in the mirror one last time before I opened the door. Marie and I went shopping that afternoon, and I got a black dress that pretty much had no back to it. My ass almost hung out like a damn slut. “Hey.”

He looked me up and down then whistled. “Day-yum.” Both of his hands were behind his back, and when he pulled them forward, he revealed a single red rose. “For my date.”

“Awe, thank you.” I took the flower and smelled the petals. The scent of summer washed over me like a warm breeze.

Kyle scanned me up and down, his eyes lingering on my legs. “Please tell me that’s one of those backless dresses.”

I shrugged. “You’ll have to wait and see.”

He crossed his fingers. “Please…please…please.”

I chuckled then grabbed a cup from the cabinet. After filling it with water, I set it on the table and placed the single rose inside.

“Oh yeah.” Kyle came behind me and pressed a kiss directly against the back of my neck.

I took an involuntary breath at the touch.

“You have the sexiest back, Francesca. Look at all that definition.” His fingers slowly moved up my spine until he reached the area between my shoulder blades.

“Thanks. I can’t see my back so I never knew.”

“Well, use my words as a mirror.” He was affectionate with me right from the beginning, picking up exactly where we left off. Kyle seemed to realize he crossed the line because he stepped back slightly and cleared his throat. “Ready to go?”

I grabbed my purple clutch. “Yeah.”

“Good. I’m starving.” His arm circled my waist as we walked out together. The touch didn’t feel rushed. In fact, it felt just right.

***

Kyle eyed his menu. “Would you judge me if I ordered two lasagnas?”

“Just for yourself?”

“Yeah.”

“Actually, if you ate both of them, I’d be impressed.”

He closed the menu and set it on the table. “Then you’re about to be entertained.”

The waiter came over and took our orders before he moved back into the sea of tables. The restaurant glowed by candlelight, and other patrons spoke quietly to each other at their tables.

“This is the first date I’ve been on since…yeah.” I grabbed a roll and tore off a piece with my fingers.

“Then we’ll make it memorable.” Kyle had the ability to lift my spirits with a simple smile. His happiness was infectious.

“What have you been up to this past year?”

“Romantically?”

I shrugged. “I meant in general, but sure.”

“Well, in my journey to find the right girl to have a meaningful relationship with, I hooked up with a looooot of people. Like, I can’t even keep count.”

“That’s a good thing, right?”

“I guess. But every time I told a girl I was looking to settle down, they jumped my bones. I think I invented the best pick-up line ever.”

I took a bite of my bread then laughed. “Share the wealth.”

“Nah,” he said. “When I said those words, I actually meant them. But if other guys start throwing that line out just to get laid, a lot of hearts are going to break. That’s not cool.”

“No, it’s not. So, you didn’t like any of them?” New York was full of so many beautiful women. He really didn’t have a connection to a single one?

“They were all great. There’s nothing to complain about. Some of them were smart, others interesting, and I even met one girl who tried out for the Yankees—true story. But…that thing you need to really feel something was never there. There were sparks here and there, but nothing that led to a bonfire.” He took a drink of his wine. “But don’t get me wrong, I had a lot of fun sleeping with all of them.”

“I’m sure you did,” I said with a chuckle.

“My mom still asks about you.”

The comment made my stomach tighten.

“She really liked you. Or she’s afraid I’ll never bring another girl home and I’ll die alone.”

“I really liked her too.” Kyle had a nice family. They were sweet to me the moment I set foot on their soil. “Is she still seeing that guy? Who owned some hotels in the Caribbean?”

“You remember that?” he asked with a smile. “Yeah, they’ve been together for a while now. She’s really happy—so I’m happy.”

“That’s awesome.”

“He treats her right, and that’s all I can ask for.”

“You think they’ll get married?”

“I hope so. I want my mom to have a companion. I know she’s in her fifties, but she’s really not that old. She’s still got a long life ahead of her.”

Kyle could have had a much different opinion about the whole thing. He could have been selfish and said he didn’t want his mother being with anyone besides his father. But all he wanted was for her to be happy. “Very true.”

“And I had ‘the talk’ with him.”

“The talk?”

“You know, the one where I say I’ll murder him if he hurts my momma. I think I scared him a bit.”

I smiled. “You’re such a momma’s boy.”

“So? I love my mom. What’s wrong with that?”

“Nothing. I think it’s really cute.”

“Hey.” He leaned over the table with his arms resting on the tablecloth. “You know what they say, right? Watch the way a man treats his mom, because he’ll treat his lady the same way.”

“Wise words.”

He leaned back and took another drink of his wine. “So, I’m a safe bet.”

“Yeah, but I already knew that.” I’d already had a relationship with Kyle and knew he was perfect in every way imaginable. He treated me right and made me happy. When I dragged him through the mud with my Hawke drama, he still stood beside me. I wish I’d never gone back to Hawke and broken Kyle’s heart. While that relationship was beautiful for a long time, he burned it to the ground. It was all a waste.

Kyle watched me closely, like he was trying to read my thoughts. “Still think about him sometimes?”

His words pulled me back to the conversation. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay. I understand. I did that a lot when I was on dates—thought about you.”

My eyes softened and my heart ached in a painful way.

Kyle tried to cheer me up with a smile. “More wine?”

***

Kyle walked me to the door then gripped both of my hips. He faced me head on, his lips dangerously close to mine. Instead of kissing me like I expected, he brushed his nose against mine. “Did you enjoy our date?”

“Yeah.”

“Am I going to get a second one?”

“More than likely.”

He chuckled then squeezed me gently. “Playing hard to get?”

“No. Just keeping you on your toes.”

His arms wrapped around my torso, caging me in like a wild animal. He brought me to his chest then kissed me with aggressive slowness. He took his time feeling my lips, trying to memorize them. One hand slowly snaked into my hair, feeling the curled strands with his fingertips. He kissed me the way any woman wanted to be kissed, with desperation and a little lust. “Are we still on for some hot sex?”

“I’ve had you booked since yesterday.”

***

Kyle kissed my shoulder as he spooned me from behind. “That was good.”

“I liked it too.” When he unzipped my dress, Hawke came into my mind. It was difficult not to compare other lovers to him, not when I held him in such high regard. But I had to let that memory of him die—because he was gone forever. Once I pushed him to the back of my mind and locked him away, I focused on Kyle and nothing else.

“You aren’t going to kick me out, right?”

“No.”

“I like this arrangement. I don’t feel like a hot piece of ass anymore.” He kissed my shoulder again, his soft lips caressing my skin.

I reached behind me and gave his ass a gentle squeeze. “No. You’ll always be a hot piece of ass.”

He chuckled into my ear. “I can live with that.”

I pulled the sheets to my shoulder then got comfortable for bed.

Kyle was still wrapped around me, his chest pressed against my back. His hard muscles tensed with every breath he took. The skin was warm, like an organic heater.

My phone beeped on the nightstand with a text message from Marie.

I hope you aren’t reading this because you’re too busy getting laid.

I smiled before I set the phone down again.

Kyle pressed his lips to my ear. “Did I ever tell you how much I like her?”

“Everyone likes her.”

“Well, I really like her now.”

***

I stood at the stove and prepared the eggs and bacon.

Kyle came out of the room in just his briefs, his hard chest looking delectable. His hair was messy from rolling around in my bed, and his eyes still contained the crumbs of sleep. “What smells so good?”

“Breakfast.”

“I’m pretty sure that’s you.” He came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist. Then he took an exaggerated sniff. “See? I knew I was right.” He gave me a quick kiss on the neck before he poured himself a cup of coffee.

“Wow. I haven’t even showered.”

“That’s why.” He wiggled his eyebrows.

I set the hot pans aside then carried the plate of food to the table. We sat together then ate quietly. I didn’t work on the weekends even though it was the busiest time of the week. I only went in to decorate cakes, but there wasn’t an order for that Sunday.

Kyle devoured his food. “You can do more than bake cookies.”

“Thanks.” I pulled out my phone and checked my emails.

Kyle kept staring at me from across the table. “Interesting necklace.”

My hand immediately went to the locket around my throat. I hadn’t taken it off since the day Hawke gave it to me. Every time I tried, I just couldn’t do it. Despite the way he hurt me, I still treasured that memory. The past caused me pain but I couldn’t forget about it—not when it was so beautiful. “Uh, thanks.”

Kyle continued to eye it but didn’t say anything else.

When I didn’t give him any details, he probably figured it out on his own.

“You have plans for the day?”

“Just laying around in my pajamas. Axel and Marie might come over. They usually stop by on Sundays.”  Not that I needed their company anymore. I was in a good place.

“Cool. Do you need someone to lay around with?”

“Sure. I feel less lazy when someone does it with me.”

“Oh, we won’t be lazy.” He gave me a dramatic wink.

“Why do you still do that?”

“Because it’s cute.”

“Not really.”

He reached under the table and gave me a quick tickle. “Whatever. You know it’s cute.”

“Do not.” I slapped his hand away.

“The next time we get it on, I’m going to do it. And you’re going to come.”

“I really doubt it…”

“Then let’s find out.” He scooped me out of the chair and carried me back to the bedroom.

I kicked my feet in protest but didn’t want to go back to the kitchen anyway. Having sex with a hunky guy, even if he did wink in the middle of it, was better than breakfast—hands down.