Waiting for Him (Waiting Series Book 3) (3 page)

      “She slept with someone else and she just told me.” As the words leave my mouth, I wish I could pull them back in before Grey could hear what I said. I know that this conversation is now destined to happen and I just want to stop thinking about the whole fucked up mess.

      “Shelby, slept with someone else?” Grey questions, his left eyebrow quirked upward toward his hairline. I nod my head and stare down into my beer. I can’t bear to see the pity I know will be reflected in his eyes.

      “What kind of sick fuck goes after a pregnant woman?” Grey spits out venomously. Oh boy, I can’t seem to hang onto any of my hurtful secrets tonight. I guess I better divulge it all and get it the fuck over with.

      “She wasn’t pregnant when she slept with him. It happened back in the fall when I was away for work. She could be carrying his baby…she doesn’t know if it’s mine or his.” I tip my glass back and drink the rest down at once. I place my glass on the bar and raise my hand to flag down the bartender. I need something much stronger than beer to get me through the rest of this conversation.

       The bartender lifts his chin toward me as if to say, “what can I get for you,” and I hold up four fingers and mouth the word tequila. He nods, grabbing the appropriate bottle from the shelf and four small glasses. He quickly pours the shots before making his way over to another customer. I pick up the first one and knock it back in one fiery gulp. I grip another one in my hand and repeat the process. As I place my glass on the bar, I can feel the familiar and enjoyable burn of the liquor as it moves down into my stomach. I want it to move up into my brain instead and numb it from the painful thoughts that keep playing over and over in my mind
. Fucking Greyson.
He just can’t let this go. He’s like a frickin’ dog after a bone. I know that Lee invited them with the best of intentions, but now I’m wishing he hadn’t.

      “What the fuck is wrong with my sister? I’m going to blister her ass when I see her. She needs some sense knocked into her. Everyone babied and coddled her too much and now look at her. She’s a total mess.”

      Greyson grabs one of my shots and knocks it back so fast that it takes me a moment to realize what he’s done.

      “Hey, fuck off and get your own shots. These are mine. If you want me to talk about all this shit, then the least you can do is leave my booze alone. Now buy me another fucking shot to replace the one you just stole.” I scowl at Greyson as I tip back the only remaining shot I have left. Thankfully, he chooses to ignore my shitty tone, and he signals the bartender for four more shots.

      “Who is this dude she slept with?” He asks me as he pushes two of the new shots in my direction. I down one of them before I can reply. I hate that I have to say his name out loud. It makes me physically ill to think about the two of them joined together so intimately. The fact that his dick was inside her...inside my girl, makes me feel violently angry. I kicked his ass when I thought he’d only kissed her. Now, I’m going to have to give him the beat down that he truly deserves.

      “Do you remember her ex, Garrett?” I ask as I tip back the final shot of mine. Grey knocks his last one back too and nods his head.

      “The professor dude…the one that disappeared?” I nod my head and run my fingers through my hair.

      “That would be him.” Grey grips the top of the bar with both hands as if he’s trying to get a hold of his temper.

      “Is he back in Boston now? How did she see him?” I laugh out loud at the absurdity of what I’m about to tell him. It’s not a funny laugh, it’s a “you’re not going to believe this,” laugh.

      “He’s the headmaster of the school she works at. He was the reason she got the job in the first place. She didn’t know he worked there until she saw him in a meeting one day. She tried to stay away from him, but he showed up at a club Hailey, and she were at one night. That’s where they hooked up and she never told me until now.” Both of my elbows are braced on the bar top as I rest my head in my hands. I grip my hair so tightly it hurts, and I’m hoping the physical pain will distract me from the emotional pain that this conversation with Greyson is causing me.

“Can we talk about something else dude? No offense, but I really want to forget about your sister for now.” Grey, drums his fingers on the bar as he’s lost in his thoughts for a moment. He finally nods his head.

      “So how about those Patriots?”

Chapter Four

Shelby

    
I somehow made it through the first weekend without Jeff, and now it’s already Thursday night of the following week. We’ve been officially over for more than a week now and if I said I wasn’t devastated I would be a huge liar. I miss Jeff more than I can say. I miss his sweetness, his humor, his sexiness, his sexiness and more of his sexiness. God, I’m so fucking horny without him. At this rate, I’m going to wear out my vibrator.
Pregnancy hormones are no joke.
I promise I will never laugh at another pregnant woman when they tell me about the trials of the second trimester. Now that I’m experiencing it first hand, it’s unbearable. Who knew that urge for sex would be so powerful? I feel like a teenage boy must, with my thoughts constantly consumed with the need to satisfy my carnal urges. I’ve never masturbated so much in my life. I’m talking once or twice each day, and it’s enough to make me look forward to the misery of the final trimester. It can’t be worse than walking around with drenched panties all the time and no longer having a man to satisfy this intense craving for sex.

***     

      I’m sitting on Hailey’s couch waiting for her to finish getting ready, and my patience is wearing thin. I’m starving and this voracious pregnancy appetite of mine is no joke. These days, it needs to be satisfied almost as often as my vagina does. Hailey and I are going out for dinner. I haven’t had a chance to clue her in to all that’s happened this past week. Well, that’s not exactly true. I didn’t feel like rehashing it all before now. I’m still devastated by Jeff moving out, but it’s time for me to come to grips with the demise of our relationship and focus on my little guy that’s brewing in my belly. I giggle to myself as I think of my large muscular brother Greyson and how gently he rubbed my baby bump and spoke to my belly the last time I saw him.

      “How are you doing in there, little man? What’s it feel like to be brewing in your mommy’s tummy dude?” I snort out loud as I think of how ridiculously sweet that moment was. I can’t say I’ve ever heard it called “brewing in your mommy’s tummy” before, but it was adorable coming out of Grey’s giant, oafish self. For as much of a badass as he is, he can be the gentlest soul. He’s so much deeper than everyone thinks he is. I only know because he and I have a special relationship. Maybe we recognize the similarities between us or it could be that we just get each other. I don’t know what the common denominator between us is, but I do know that Greyson has always been my safe haven. He’s the only one of my brothers that I confide in. I love all of them, but Grey’s special. He’s a troubled soul and like recognizes like. I know he’s got a darkness to him that he tries to hide from our family. I don’t know all of the details of what makes him the damaged individual he is. I’m sure it began with the death of my mother. I was only a tiny baby when she passed, but Grey and Aiden were almost four. They were certainly old enough to be affected by her death and yet it seems as though Grey took a much worse blow from it all than his twin Aiden did.

      I haven’t spoken with any of my family members since before J and I broke up.
Broke up.
It
sounds so juvenile, but then again don’t all the other euphemisms for ending a relationship. We split, we separated, we parted ways, we put the cow out to pasture, we put the final nail in the coffin. Those are all horrible ways of saying that I fucked up one of the best parts of my life, and there’s no way to change it. In spite of all that, I’m still wearing the engagement ring he gave me. Sadly, I think I might be in denial…no, I know that I am, and I don’t have any plans to leave this destination anytime soon. Denial feels much better than reality at this point.

      “Okay Shelb, I’m ready. Where do you want to go?” Hailey asks me as she puts on some gold, dangly earrings that look great against the backdrop of her black hair.

      “I’m up for anything. I’m not craving anything particular.”

      “Hey, Shelby,” Cory says in his deep, booming voice as he walks into the living room. I smirk at Hailey as I realize exactly what it is that made her late or should I say who did?

      “Hi, Cory,” I say as he walks over to me and kisses me on the cheek. I take in his longish hair and close shaved beard and realize what a great looking guy he actually is. Hailey wanted him to grow his hair out to the length it used to be, all those years ago when they first met. He wears it slicked back on the days that he has court, but now it’s product free and falls in loose waves to just above his chin. It looks sexy on him, and even I want to know if his hair is as soft as it looks. I’ll have to ask Hailey when we’re at dinner.

      “Okay babe, I’m going to hit the road. Text me and let me know where you girls end up so I won’t worry about you. I shouldn’t be late.” He leans over and gently kisses Hailey on her lips before trailing his knuckles down her cheek. His platinum wedding band catches the light and reflects off of it. It’s so surreal for me to think about these two being married, but I’m so happy for them.

      “I love you, babe. Stay aware of your surroundings.” He gives her one final peck on the lips before he puts his jacket on. “I’ll see you later Shelby. I’m sure you already know this, but I’m meeting Jeff and Lee at Big D’s, and I’m already late. I’ll see you later my beautiful wife.”

      “I love you. Be safe.” Hailey calls to him as he opens the door. He looks back at her one final time and gives her a smile accompanied by a wink before he closes the door behind him.

      “You guys are ridiculously cute. It’s painful to watch how sweet he is with you. I think I have a cavity just from being around you guys for five minutes.” Hailey snorts out loud.

      “You’re crazy. We’re just newly married. I’m sure we won’t always be like this, but I sure am enjoying it.”

      “He’s crazy protective of you.”

      “He is. He’s such a caveman, but I actually love that about him. He makes me feel safe and cherished. What more can I ask for in a man?” I nod my head in agreement. She’s right. If you find a man that makes you feel like he’d do anything to keep you safe and he shows you daily how much he loves you, then you’re a lucky woman. I had that with Garrett until he disappeared and that made me feel anything but loved and cherished. I also had it with Jeff, but I certainly made a mess of that relationship. Sometimes I wonder if I subconsciously wanted to be with Garrett, so I sabotaged my relationship with Jeff. It doesn’t really matter why I slept with Garrett, what matters is that I did.

      I was pretty shocked when Cory said that he’s going out with Jeff and Lee. I guess he’ll know the scoop by the end of the night. I’ll be telling Hailey too, so it doesn’t really matter. I wonder if Jeff is going to have rebound sex with someone. God, I hope not. I know I have no say in the matter, especially where I slept with another man, but at least, it wasn’t some random, dirty stranger that I just hooked up with. I need to stop thinking about him and enjoy my time with Hailey. I’m getting more and more down as I think about what a mess I’m in.

      “Shelby, what’s going on in that head of yours. I swear I can hear the gears turning, you’re thinking so hard.” Maybe it’s best if I just get this all off of my chest now before we go anywhere. Besides, if I tell her in public, it will be worse. I’m bound to break down in tears and I don’t want a bunch of witnesses to my emotional moments.

      “Jeff and I broke up. He moved out last week.” Hailey gasps out loud when she hears my news.

      “What happened?” She sits down next to me and takes my hand, squeezing it to lend me some strength.

      “That night that you and I went out to the club and Garrett and his friend Ian showed up,” I pause and she nods at me, “Remember how I said that Garrett kissed me? Well, we did more than kiss. We actually had sex in the bathroom that night.” Hailey gasps again and I wince in reaction, before continuing. “This baby may actually be his. He didn’t wear a condom and I had just gotten over that horrible stomach bug. I threw up mostly at night and I take my birth control at night.” Hailey’s blue eyes are open wide with shock and so is her mouth as she realized what happened. If I wasn’t so upset, I might actually laugh at her expression.

      “Have you told Garrett yet?”

      “Yes, I told him and he was understandably shocked. He was angry with me at first for keeping it from him for so long, but he wasn’t a jerk about it. He seemed almost happy at the thought of having a baby. What am I going to do Hailey? My life is a total mess and I’m about to bring another human being into it. I don’t know how to be a mother.”

      “Shelby, you’re going to be a great mother. I can see it in the way you care for the people that you love. You have nothing to worry about, honey. You’re going to be a natural.” She squeezes my hand again and I appreciate her words of encouragement. She just helped to reassure me and that’s a huge relief because wondering what kind of mother I’ll be is all I’ve been able to think about lately. I know I should be concerned about the state of my relationship with Jeff and my lack of one with Garrett, but all I think about is this little guy in my belly. I want to be the best mother that I can be, especially since I feel like he was conceived in a way that we can never talk about. I don’t want him to ever find out that he’s the product of a drunken bathroom quickie.