Twisted (10 page)

I shook my head, not really having anything to say on the matter.

Ben didn’t say anything either. Just gave me a sympathetic glance before returning to the hypnotizing motion of swirling his thumb across my skin.

“Will you tell me about your parents?” I asked, hopefully. He seemed so relaxed and he was finally opening up to me. I didn’t want him to stop.

“There’s not much to tell. They’ve been through a lot. They just want it all to go away. If I’m in a fight, they blame me. They tell me I need to stay out of trouble. Kind of like I’m not supposed to be seen or heard. If something happens, they don’t want to hear about it. They just want me to finish school so I can get out of here. So they can get on with their lives. I think they would’ve moved by now but they had to take out a second mortgage to pay for all of the lawyer fees. For me, then Trent. So they’re kind of stuck here…and stuck with me for now. Mostly I just try to stay out of their way.”

“That’s why you’re at the park so much?” I guessed.

He nodded. “There’s really nowhere else to go. I spend a lot of time at the library, too. I hang out there a lot in the winter. That just leaves the park this time of year. Or if I can get home before my parents, sometimes I go down to the basement. It’s only partially finished so they don’t usually bother to go down there. They wouldn’t be happy if they knew I was spending time with you. There’s too much potential for it to cause problems.”

“Your parents are kind of like my mom but worse,” I sighed. “I’m invisible to my mom but your parents want you to be invisible to the world.”

I leaned my head over and rested it on his shoulder. Neither of us said anything for a long while. I’m sure we were both thinking over everything that had been said already. I was so sad for him. I had hoped he at least had his parents to lean on but he didn’t. He had lost someone precious to him. His friends had all abandoned him. His brother had betrayed him in a way that was unimaginable. School had to be hell for him and even worse, his home was somewhere he felt he didn’t belong.

“Will you tell me about Katie?”  I wanted to eat the words right back up the moment they spilled from my mouth.

“No,” he said softly.

He gently pulled his hand from mine. He rose from the blanket and walked closer to the river. He stood at the top of the sloping embankment. I stayed where I was, letting him have his space. He looked out over the river for a while. His back was to me. I wanted to go to him but I was afraid I had already crossed one too many personal boundaries this afternoon. Instead, I watched him, wondering what he was thinking. I hoped his thoughts were peaceful.

After several minutes he turned to me, giving me such a huge smile that it reached his eyes and lit up his face. My heart fluttered happily at the sight of it.

“Maya, come here,” he quietly called.

I nearly leapt from the ground to join him.

“See those?” he asked. He pointed out toward the river.

“Swans?” I guessed as I took in the sight of the massive, white birds. “I’ve never seen any before.”

He nodded. “They’re Trumpeter Swans. See how long and graceful their necks are? The males are almost six feet tall and their wingspan is right around seven feet. You hardly ever see them in this area. They must be migrating. This is only the second pair I’ve ever seen.”

I moved forward craning my head, trying to get a better view as the swans drifted along in the murky brown, rain-churned water.

“Maya, don’t—,” Ben started to warn me.

I felt the saturated ground slip beneath my feet. I let out a shriek as I felt a miniature mudslide take place under my shoes. My arms flailed. Ben instantly reached out to grab me. I felt his hand on my elbow. But instead of him keeping me up, I pulled him down. We both cascaded down the short embankment on our butts and catapulted into the water with a double splash.

I bobbed along several feet before I surfaced with a splutter only to go under again as my flip-flops slipped in the muck. I felt Ben’s hands grab my shoulders as he pulled me out of the water. The moment he let go of me I slipped under again as my feet slid out of my shoes. He pulled me up just in time for me to see my new pink flip-flops swirl off, out of reach.

I sputtered my thanks and tried to gain my footing on the slimy bottom. The undercurrent was strong and my bare feet started skidding along the slippery riverbed. I let out another shriek as I felt my feet being washed out from under me. Murky water filled my mouth and nose as I was plunged under again.

Ben’s arms scooped me up. “Damn it, Maya!” he cried. “Are you just going to float away?!” he asked as he held me firmly to him.

“M-maybe,” I said as I gasped for air. I held on to him as he crushed me in his arms, trying to keep me out of the worst of the current.

After a moment he carefully let me go, placing me on my feet.

It was a chore to stay upright, even with Ben’s assistance. The swirling water was almost mid-thigh on me but barely past his knees. He was also probably close to double my weight and he had shoes on. He firmly held my hand, towing me along so I wouldn’t get dragged off in the current along with my shoes.

With some effort we scaled the slippery mud slope and collapsed on the flat ground above.

He looked over at me. We were both soaked, muddy and out of breath lying spread eagle on my blanket.

“Nothing is ever simple with you is it?” It sounded like more of a statement than a question so I didn’t respond.

“Thank you for pulling me out.” I bit my lip before asking, “Are you mad?”

“Why would I be mad?”

I laughed at the confusion on his face. “Not only did I scare the swans away but you’re soaked, your shoes are squishing and you’re covered in mud!”

He shrugged. “I’ve been in worse situations.”

I knew that was true.

“Are you mad about before?” I asked softly. I didn’t want him to be upset that I asked about Katie. I looked over at him again.

“I’m not mad about anything,” he said quietly. His face was several inches from mine. His eyes were cloudy and serious. There was just a hint of blue in them today. He met my gaze and didn’t look away. Having him look at me like that, when he never had before, was mesmerizing. So much so that it took my breath away.

He reached out and touched my cheek with the back of his hand. It sent tingles running through me all the way to my toes, causing them to curl up like little caterpillars on the ends of my bare feet. His fingers rested on my cheek for a moment, light and gentle as a butterfly’s touch. I was afraid to move for fear of breaking the spell. My heart fluttered as I watched his face. For once, it was so peaceful. His eyes followed the slow trail his fingers made from my cheek, down my neck to where they lingered on my exposed collarbone. I barely breathed all the while wishing and hoping that he would please, please just kiss me.

“Well?” she asked impatiently. “Did he kiss you?”

I had waited days before finally having a chance to talk to Phoebe alone.

“Nope,” I said, puckering up my lips to check out my new gloss. I liked the sheen, despite the overly fruity flavoring. I snapped the mirror shut and flipped the visor up.  My hair was being more well-behaved than normal.  I had my favorite new jeans on. My eyebrows were freshly plucked and the eye shadow I had borrowed from Remy really brought out the green in my eyes. Despite all of that, I wasn’t very excited to be going to a party. Phoebe and I were on our way to get Hailey. We were meeting Olivia and Henry there.

I didn’t usually go to parties because, thanks to my dear mother, I had dealt with enough drinking to last a lifetime. Also, knowing Ben wouldn’t be there kind of took away the anticipation. I had decided to go because I thought at the very least I could be the responsible person to drive my friends home if they needed a ride.

And a night out did sound fun. 

“I think he was probably just wiping mud off of my face.” I wasn’t sure that was true. A little shiver ran through me as I recalled how long his hand had lingered. “You won’t tell anyone, will you?” I asked, not wanting my confession to affect Ben in any way. I already knew she wouldn’t. The annoyed look she gave me confirmed it.

As she looked my direction, her eyes opened slightly in surprise as she caught sight of something out of the passenger window. I quickly turned my head to see what had grabbed her attention.

“Who…What...Is that…” I stammered. “
Stop
!”

“Oh, hell,” she muttered. She slowed and pulled off to the side of the road on the edge of the park. She grabbed my arm. “Maya, hang on!”

I turned to look at her. “What?!” I asked frantically. My eyes darted back to the sidewalk cutting through the park to the parking lot. Alec, Ty and someone I didn’t recognize were hurrying away. They scurried like rats into the darkness, leaving someone on the ground behind them. I knew that someone was Ben.

“I have to check on him!” I jumped out of the car and ran across the sprawling grass.

“Ben?” 

He was curled into a ball and he groaned. His eyes were scrunched tightly shut.

“Ben?” I brushed his hair away from his face. I was expecting blood, lots of it. His face was injury free…but pain was splashed all over it.

“Ben, honey, it’s Maya. I’m going to help you, okay?” I said in a voice so shaky I barely recognized it. I wasn’t sure exactly how I was going to help him. I had no idea what to do. I was terrible in emergencies. I felt myself start to panic. I took his hand and squeezed it because it was the only thing I could think of.

After a moment he caught his breath. He looked at me and groaned again. I wasn’t sure if it was due to pain or at the realization that I was still there.

“What do you need me to do?” Phoebe asked as she came up to join us.

I looked at her helplessly. I wished Remy were with me. She was a nurse. She’d know what to do.

“I’m fine,” Ben said through clenched teeth.

I let out an indignant little huff. “For heaven’s sake! You are not fine! You’re hurt! You’re lying on a sidewalk! You look really, really hurt!” My voice got more hysterical as the words tumbled out.

He took a deep breath and opened his eyes to look at me. “Maya…calm down.”

“
Hungh
!” was all I could manage to say to that.

Phoebe finally spoke up. “Do you think we can get him to my car? I can drive him to the hospital.”

“No!” Ben said and he tried to sit up. I slid my arms around his shoulders to help him. When he was sitting I settled on my knees next to him and he leaned against me. His breathing sounded painful and strained.

“You don’t want to get checked out?” I asked.

He shook his head.

“What do you want me to do then?” I had one arm around him. My other hand was on his shoulder to steady him.

His next words came out sounding choppy. “Any chance you’ll just go away?”

I huffed out my indignation again. “Don’t you know me at all yet? I’ll bring you home if you won’t go get checked out.”

“’Kay,” he said as he tried to nod.

“Can you get up?”

It took him a moment but then he nodded again.

“I’ll help,” Phoebe said softly. She closed the gap she’d left between us. She grabbed Ben under one arm while I took the other. We managed to get him to his feet.

“I have my car here,” he said. “I just…I needed to catch my breath...I’m okay now.”

I looked at Phoebe and she nodded. Together we helped him to the parking lot. We did our best to assist him but there was no doubt he did most of the work. Yet it was clear it was a strain for him to walk. We slowly made it across the asphalt to his car.

“What do you want me to do Maya? Do you want me to go with you?” Phoebe asked quietly. “Just tell me what you need.”

I looked at Ben then back to Phoebe. “I’m fine. You just go ahead to…you know, Hailey’s. Just tell her I changed my mind.” I was uncomfortable saying I’d planned on going to a party. A party where Ben would not be welcome.

“Call me if you need anything,” she said as she turned to go. She looked over her shoulder apprehensively and I waved her away.

“Where are your keys?” I asked Ben.

He motioned to the front right pocket of his jeans. The movement caused him to grimace. I slid my hand around him and my fingers dove into his pocket. I plucked the keys out quickly then opened the door and let him topple into the passenger seat.

“Maya, really, this is fine,” he said through clenched teeth.

I looked around the dark parking lot. “This?” I asked, not sure I was following. “Like right here?”

He nodded.

“You want me to
leave
you here? That is
not
going to happen.”

He was silent.

He looked miserable.

“Ben? Talk to me, please.”

“This is so…it’s just...” he squeezed his eyes shut.

“What?”

“Humiliating,” he grated out. He was leaning against the passenger door, his head resting against the cool glass of the window. He wasn’t looking at me.

“Falling off a bike at my age?
That
is humiliating,” I informed him. “I’m pretty sure my landing was anything but graceful.”

“Your landing was scary,” he admitted. “But you were hit by a car.”

“And you were hit by a football team,” I pointed out.

“Three guys do not make a football team.” He closed his eyes again and kept his head pressed against the window.

“Close enough. There were three of them and one of you. It was not fair. Now tell me how to get to your house.”

“I’m staying here,” he stubbornly insisted. “I’ll be fine.”

“Uh-uh. No way,” I told him. “I’ll drive you home. It’s not a big deal.” I reached over to give his leg what I meant to be a reassuring squeeze but he cringed and I quickly let go.

“Maya, will you please listen to me?” he asked. I knew talking pained him. “I’m telling you, I can’t go home. Not like this. My parents will be furious. It’s just better if I stay here.” 

I looked at him then. He had doubled over, so he could hold his stomach. His head was resting on the dash. His parents would blame him for this? How? How was that possible? 

“I’ll explain what happened,” I said.

His head jerked back and his eyes were wide. “No! You can’t go to my house. After what happened…If they see me with you, they would freak out,” he said miserably. “Please. Just trust me on that.”

I couldn’t believe I was hearing this. “Why? That doesn’t make sense. Like something bad would happen again? All I’m doing is giving you a ride home. I just want to help you.”

He looked at me miserably. “Maya,
please
.”

I stuck the key in the ignition. “Okay, fine,” I told him. “But I’m not leaving you here. You didn’t leave me in the road. I am not going to leave you in a parking lot.” Did I just say that? What had happened to my life? “I’ll just take you home with me.”

We were already on our way before I even had all of the words out. He didn’t argue, much to my dismay. Usually I jogged to the park because it was so close. With Ben’s car we were home within minutes. I pulled up as close to the house as I could. I knew Remy couldn’t possibly miss his car when she got home in the morning but I would deal with that then.

He sighed when I turned off the ignition, turning to me for the first time since we’d left the parking lot. “This isn’t a good idea. You look like you have someplace to be.”

“What?” I asked, feeling my eyes widen just a bit. “No, I’m not going anywhere.”

“Maya,” he said, in a slightly chastising tone. “It’s obvious you and Phoebe were going somewhere besides Hailey’s. Brandon Meyer’s party?” he guessed. He was one of the underclassman Hailey had been talking about.

I looked away, not wanting to answer.

“Look,” he began, the sound of pain straining his voice, “I don’t want to keep you from going. You’re all dressed up. You look…you’re really...”

He kept trailing off and I waited in silence.

“You look even prettier than you usually do,” he said quietly, looking past me out the window as he said it. “You should go. Everyone is going to be there.”

There was no bitterness in his voice as he said the last sentence.

I tried to roll my eyes as I blinked back a few tears. When had I turned into such a crier?    

“You must’ve hit your head. I think you have a concussion,” I replied and then sniffled. Then I shook my head, determined. “I didn’t want to go in the first place. I
really
don’t want to go now. I know Alec and his friends will be there. I don’t want to see them. I don’t want to be anywhere near them.” It was true.

“It’s not fair that you’re missing it because of me,” he insisted.

“Ben,” I said quietly, “haven’t you figured it out by now? I’d rather be with you than
any
of them.” Before he could answer, or tell me something I didn’t want to hear, like I shouldn’t think that way, I opened my door and hopped out. I jogged around to his side to help him. He grimaced and winced. I hated that I was probably hurting him by tugging at him. We finally managed to get into the house and I led him to my room.

“Here, sit on the edge of my bed. Okay?” I asked as I helped him settle onto it. When he was seated I reached for the bottom of his shirt. I was careful to move slowly, one arm at a time. Even in the dim light from my bedside lamp I could tell the bruising was bad. His stomach and chest looked like a canvas of blue, purple and red swirls and splotches.

I heard a sharp intake of breath and it took a moment to register it was from my mouth. “Oh...” I whimpered.

“It’s fine. Don’t worry about it,” he mumbled.

“It’s not fine! I don’t know what to do. There’s no blood but really bad bruising. What if you have a broken rib?” I asked.

He shook his head. “I don’t. I’ve had one before and I know what it feels like. If you have an ice pack and aspirin, those would be good.”

I nodded. “I’ll be right back.” I ran off to the bathroom for the ibuprofen I’d used the day I fell off my bike. Next I went to the kitchen for some ice packs and a glass of water. When I came back Ben’s eyes were closed and he was swaying a bit. I set everything on my nightstand and stood in front of him, placing my hands on his shoulders. “Are you okay? I mean, are you going to pass out or something?”

He shook his head again. With his eyes still closed he leaned forward. The movement caused his forehead to rest against mine. I knew it was entirely inappropriate for me to be excruciatingly aware that his lips were only a chin tilt away from mine.

“I could really use that aspirin,” he whispered.

“Right.” I removed a hand from his shoulder and cupped his chin in it. “Just keep your eyes open for a minute longer, okay? You worry me when you close them and sway like that.” I let go of him and I shook out two ibuprofens. He asked for three more. I wasn’t sure if that was okay but I had a feeling maybe he’d done this before so I gave them to him.

“Are you sure it’s not a problem that I’m here?” he finally asked as if he just realized exactly where he was.

“Yes, I’m sure,” I said without hesitation. “And if you need a place to stay you can always come here. I mean it. Now do you want to sleep in your jeans or would you be more comfortable with them off?”

He chose off and once again I had to help him up. I stood back; waiting to see if he would need assistance. He slid the jeans down carefully. Several bruises peeked out of the bottom hem of his boxers. I wondered who it was that had kicked him. All three of the cowards? Had they taken turns? He stepped out of the jeans and I tossed them aside.

I helped him sit back down and he lowered himself into the pillows. When he was settled into my bed, ice packs and all, I just stood there looking at him for a moment.