Tortured Beginning (26 page)

Ben

I sit at the table waiting for Susie. I've been on my best behavior here, so I should be getting out soon. As I sit here, I'm getting irritated about waiting. I look around to see her walking through the door.

"Well it's about fucking time."

"I'm sorry Ben. I couldn't get out of work."

"I don't have all day to fucking wait for you."

"Please, baby. Don't be mad at me. I'm here now."

I hate when she calls me that. She thinks that she will be mine someday. The stupid bitch didn't know I was only using her for what I needed. I calm myself, I don't need her pissed and leaving. I grab her hand and rub the top of it with my thumb.

"I'm not mad. I'm sorry I snapped at you, it's only because I missed you."

She smiles widely at me, leans over and kisses me.

"I forgive you. I know how rough it must be in here for you. That stupid bitch, I could kill her for getting you in here."

"Hey, it's fine. I will be out of here soon."

"But she lied about you. And Trevan fell for all her lies. If it wasn't for her, you would be home with me."

"I know babe. I'll be home soon."

"I can't wait. Then we can finally get married, start our lives together."

"Soon. Now tell me what you know."

She sighs loudly, "Fine. I do know that Trevan and Jaylah broke up."

"Really?" I look at her surprised and gester for her to go on.

I think about what I will do when I get out, as Susie fills me on. She has been watching Jaylah for me. I start getting angry when she tells me that the motorcycle asshole is back. I hid my reactions from Susie. All of this makes for an interesting twist in events. I will need to make a visit to Jaylah when I get out of here.

The guard yells out that we have two minutes left. Susie looks at me with those damn doe eyes. She looks ready to cry and I can't fucking stand that.

"Hey babe, don't do that. I will be out soon."

"I know. I hate that fucking bitch so much. This is all her fault."

I can't stand when she talks about my Jay like that. But she is a means to an end, I need her for right now. When I'm done with her, she will know it.  I give her my sweetest smile and grab her. I kiss her hard on the lips, making sure she remembers it.

"I will miss you, babe."

"Me too. I love you, Ben."

"Me too."

The guard comes by our table, "Times up."

I stand, smiling at Susie. I turn and walk through the door back towards my cell. Once I know she can't see, I wipe my lips with the back of my hand. God she is such a fucking needy bitch. I can't wait for the day that I won't need her anymore.

I walk into my cell and lie on my bed. I put my hands behind my head and start to plot what I will do when I get out of this shit hole. I drift happily into sleep, knowing I will have my Jay-Bird soon. And I will get rid of the pain in my ass, Susie.

It's been a couple days since our all night, talk fest. I was glad that I had a couple of bottles of wine. We stayed up talking about all of our problems, something I think we all needed. It felt like old times, and it was nice to be with them.

I drank to much again that night, though. I got sick, after all that drinking. I think I'm going to stay away from it for awhile.

I still hadn't heard from Nico, though. It's bothering more than I will admit to anyone. I tried texting him again, to see if he wanted to get together. The only response I got was that he was working.

I walk into work, know that it's the start of our busy time, Halloween is only a few weeks away. Anne and I decided to decorate today, once we are done baking. So we scheduled Kayla and Amanda to come in this morning.

I actually love decorating for Halloween. The rest of the holidays, I could do without. I know to some that sounds horrible. But that's just the way it is for me. Anne loves Christmas, so it works out for us.

We get through the baking, pretty fast this morning. We talk a lot today, something we don't always do. Anne and I, aren't the type of friends that have to fill the space with talk. We get into the grove in the mornings, with music. So this was a nice change.

Kayla and Amanda walk into the back. They drop off their stuff in the office, and say their hello's. Once we get everything situated up front, I head into the back for a quick cigarette.

Anne steps outside, to grab the decorations from her trunk. I give her a hand, grabbing one of the totes. We have a lot of decorations, because we love to do a huge display in the window. We also have centerpieces, and other things to hang around the cafe.

Once we have all the totes inside, we begin our transformation. I get lost in the work, loving how everything is turning out. I take a break to grab a cup of coffee. As, I come around the counter, the bell to the door rings that there is a customer.

I look up from stirring my coffee, to see Nico walking in. He looks at me and stops. I walk back to my decorations, ignoring him. I'm not sure what to do or how to react, so I go back to work.

I stand there watching her ignore me. I knew she wasn't going to fall into my arms, when she saw me. I know I overacted about the bar, but I wanted to kill someone, when I saw her touch Trevan.

I needed to sort out my feelings, before I could be around her. It's not her fault, all she did was touch his arm. She was drunk, but it was the look in her eyes, when she looked at him. I knew what kind of woman she was. But things were changing between us, or so I thought.

I know, I'm fucked up. But I want to be a better man, when I'm with her.

I walk up to her, and reach out to touch her. I drop my arm, thinking better of it.

"Hey, can I talk to you?"

"Can't. I'm working," she says, not looking at me. She throws my own words, back at me.

I drop into the chair, next to the table she is working at. I put my head in my hands, leaning on my knee's.

"Please. I know I fucked up," I whisper.

She sighs, "Fine. But not here, not now. Come to my house later."

I look up at her, and see she is looking at me. "Okay."

"Come around, six."

I nod, as I get up. I start walking away, and she puts her hand on my arm. I turn, and she smiles at me. I smile back.

I watched Nico leave. He looked defeated when he walked in. I look forward to tonight and working this all out, I've missed him.

I look around to see, Anne watching me. She smiles at me and goes back to work. I sit and take a drink of my coffee. I feel like a headache is coming on. What a week this is turning out to be.

I get up to find some tylenol. Going into the office, to grab my purse. I take two pills out and pop them in my mouth. I decide this is a good time for a smoke.

Now that I'm home, I feel anxious for Nico to get here. I decided to make dinner, which I don't do very often. I decide to make Parmesan Mayo Chicken Breast, I've had it at Anne's house and it's delicious.

I get the chicken in the oven. I cut up my red skin potatoes and get them in a pot of water. I bought asparagus, to roast in the oven. Once everything is cooking, I decide to step outside for a cigarette and wait for Nico.

I go to the front door and step out onto the porch. I have a chair and small table set up, and sit down. I don't have to wait long, and Nico pulls in. I'm not use to seeing him in a car, I like his motorcycle better. But the days are getting colder, so I don't blame him.

He gets out of his car, and walks up the path to the house. I put my smoke out, and stand up.

"Hey you."

"Hello, come on in. I have dinner in the oven."

"Wow, really?"

"Don't look so surprised. I love to cook, but being just me, I don't do it all the time."

We walk in, and the smells make my stomach growl.

"Smells great."

We walk into the kitchen, and I check on the food.

"If you want something to drink, it's in the fridge."

He gets a beer out of the fridge and leans against the counter watching me cook. I drain the potatoes, and add butter, dill, parsley and salt. Once that is mixed I put in a bowl, I pull the asparagus out and plate that as well. I check the chicken and plate that as well. I brought rolls home from work and put that in a basket. I put everything on the table and we sit to eat.