Torn (Torn Heart) (25 page)

Chapter 32

Jackson

A few days later, I get a frantic call in the middle of the night from Skylar, telling me to meet her at the hospital. There’s been an accident. My mind races with worse case scenarios as I’m hauling ass, half-dressed. And at first all I can think of is something happened to Skylar and I feel sick to my stomach.

But when I pull into the parking lot by the ER and she meets me at the door, I discover it’s not her. It’s Monica. There was an accident, and now she’s in the hospital. And she’s pregnant. This can’t be good.

I’m chanting prayers over and over that she and baby Brayden are okay. Yeah, they settled on Brayden for his name. And they have to be okay.

“Hey, I’m here.”
I envelope a tired and very red-eyed Skylar in my arms. Her body shakes with worry.

I pull back to look her in the eye. “What happened?”

“There was an accident, she was hit and banged up pretty bad. Jake is pretty messed up over it. He said it was his fault. He keeps blaming himself over and over. But obviously he didn’t hurt her on purpose, he wouldn’t do that. You need to talk to him. They have to be okay.” Tears pour down her face and I wish I was here sooner. “We’ve been here since eleven. Jake called me, so my mom dropped me off here. I didn’t want to bother you.”

I curse when I look at my phone and see
it’s two a.m. “I wish you’d called me sooner.” I tuck her hair behind her ear and kiss her forehead, and then steer her to the lobby to sit down. She leans against me and covers her mouth when a yawn slips out. “Why don’t you sleep a little? I’ll wake you when Jake comes out here.” She doesn’t argue.

I send Jake
a text so he knows I’m here.

Twenty minutes later, he pushes through the double doors and reaches my side. His eyes wide and face pale. “Hey, thanks for coming. Sorry, it’s so late.”

“Why didn’t you call me?” I shift in the seat, feeling the numbness in my muscles. “You’re practically family. You should know I’d be here in a heartbeat. How is she?”

He rubs his jaw, and starts pacing. “It was my fault. I should be in that bed. I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going, and I’m just…” he stops pacing and looks at me, his face pained. “God, please. I can’t lose them, either of them. I didn’t want a baby, at first. I was scared, and afraid I’d fail as a father. I don’t know the first thing about raising a child. But now,” He sits back down and I wish I knew what to say, how to console him. I just sit and listen instead. “Now, I’m looking forward to the unknown. I can’t wait to raise Brayden and be a family.” His eyes glisten with tears. I look away and clench my fists. “I’m sorry; I don’t want to babble about shit we can’t control.”

“Jake. She’ll be okay.”

“God damn, this is so fucked up. I need some coffee.
A red bull. I’m so exhausted, my head hurts. I feel like I’ve been hit by a train. Jesus, this is ridiculous.”

I wrap my arm around his shoulder, trying to comfort him, anyway that I can. My heart is pounding, just being in this situation as the friend. This sucks.

I glance over at the chair where Skylar’s cooped up in a ball. I walk over to her, smoothing her hair out. I lightly kiss her cheek.

Jake’s called by the nurse when the doctor comes in. He talks to him for a few minutes. I wait until the doctor leaves to ask him the news.

“She’s okay. She’s banged up a bit, but nothing too serious. She hurt her leg but it’ll heal. The baby’s doing okay, too. Oh fuck, I feel like I can breathe again.” He runs his hand through his hair, frantically. “Thank you for being here.”

I pat his back.
“Any time, Jake. I’m just glad she and Brayden are okay.”

“Go take Skylar home. She’s exhausted.” I nod and tell him to call me when he’s returning home.

I lightly shake her, “Baby, come on. Let’s get you home.”  She mumbles something but doesn’t move. I lift her head up and kiss her, and it’s all it takes for her to wake up when she’s kissing me back. I pull back and smirk. “Good morning, Sleeping Beauty.”

She rubs her eyes, “What happened? Where’s Jake? Monica?”

I calm her down when she begins frantically calling their names. “He’ll call us when they’ve gone home. Let’s get you home to bed now, okay?”

Monica was discharged
. Although she had to stay a couple days for observation, and because she hurt her leg, which I still don’t know what happened exactly, but I don’t push Jake to tell me. He just said it was his fault and he’s beaten himself up about it. So I left it alone. We just thank God that she and the baby Bray are okay. She needs the time to heal for her pregnancy.

The upcoming weeks are studying and getting ready for exams. I work, which I’ve gotten the money now for an apartment, finally. And I found one I like and I plan on moving the day before graduation.

Skylar and I go out with Jared and Hannah a few times, to get better acquainted. We spend time with our family.
Even Brandon. We’re getting ready to finish high school and go off into the real world. It’s kind of scary, but in another sense, it’s definitely a journey I’m ready to take. As long as I have Skylar by my side, I can do anything.

Tonight, it’s prom at school and since we’re not going, I took today off so I could prepare my own prom for us.

Chapter 33

Skylar

             
I watch the scenery fly by and wonder where we’re going. I’m anxious and thrilled at the same time. I was under the impression he was working, but apparently he took today off. Things like this make me wonder if leaving is the right choice. It’s only three months, but so much can change in that time. Would he still be the same person? Would I come back different? Would our feelings change? So many questions plague me but I push them aside, for tonight.

             
I start to notice the lake we spent many summers fishing and realize where we’re going. A bout of giddiness fills my chest. I haven’t been here in so long. It’s dark but dim lights brighten our spot just enough to sit over the edge of the cliff.

             
“What are we doing here?”

             
“Since you weren’t gonna be at your own prom, I wanted us to have a private one.” He kisses my cheek once he parks the car. “ He’s laid out a blanket with a cooler. “What’s this?”

             
He smiles up at me. “Not your typical prom, but it’s my idea of a stroll down memory lane.” He opens the cooler and pulls out lunchables and snacks that we always brought on trips to the lake as kids. It’s better than prom. So much better.

             
“Oh my god, you seriously busted out the Guess Who game!” I beam, already taking it out of the box.

             
He puts his hand out to stop me, “Wait, let’s eat first.” He hands me a bag of chips and a candy bar. We eat in comfortable silence. It’s a warm night with a gentle breeze, cooling my sweaty face. I take my turkey, cheese and cracker and stack them on top of each other before shoving them into my mouth. I haven’t had these…at least with Jackson since we were kids. It brings back so many memories when my dad was alive and he’d take us camping and all we ate were lunchables. Tears prick my eyes; I blink them back so I don’t spoil the mood with my emotions. It’s too quiet, which is fine on other occasions, but it’s hard to hide my sniffling from my emotions.

             
I stretch my legs out in front of me as he says, “Don’t forget about your pudding.”

I stare at him and laugh. “You’re kidding, right? That’s my favorite part, which should be saved for last.”

              He walks back to the car. I watch him for a minute, and look away to finish my food.

             
“Let’s dance.” Jackson brings back a boom box.

“Wow, tonight really is about walking down memory lane, isn’t it?
”

“These aren’t that old.” He laughs, setting it on the ground. “Remember the one my dad had with the broken antennae?”

“And the crappy speakers? Yeah, I remember.” We both laugh.

He looks down at my wrist. “You’re wearing your bracelet, I see.”

“Always. I love it.” My mood suddenly changes, “I don’t wanna leave you, Jackson. For three months, anything can change. I can change, you can change, and our love can change.”

He quickly scoops me up in his arms, “Nothing will change. You’re
gonna go with your mom and you’re gonna have so much fun. You’ll paint and take all these amazing pictures. You’re gonna tell me all about your experience because I’ve never been there and I wanna know what it’s like, and then we’re gonna figure out where to go from there.”

I press my lips to his.
Sparks ignite within me and I deepen the kiss. Our mouths move urgently as my tongue slips in, but I quickly pull back before it gets anymore hot and heavy. My forehead rests against his as I try to calm my breathing. “Sorry, I got carried away.”

             
A grin takes over his face, “Never be sorry for that.” I squirm when his hand slips under my shirt, grazing my bare stomach. I want more of it, but as I lean in to kiss him again, he stops me. “I like how you think, but I want one dance and a game of Guess Who first.”

We danced under the bright stars. Jackson brought a bunch of CD’s and I got to choose the majority of the songs we danced to. I was good about mixing it up and not just pick all the slow songs with sappy love notes.

“Is this better than being at the school dance?”

             
I pull back and grin, “Are you kidding? I never cared for the school dances. They can’t compare to this.” Nothing can.

             
“Well, what about when I do this-“ And I squeal when he dips me, keeping a firm hold on his shoulders so I don’t fall. We laugh and dance, until he tickles me and I dash to the other side, getting away from him but he catches me anyway.

             
“Stop! Stop!” He brings me down to the ground, pinning my hands above my head and my body thrashes uselessly. “Jackson! Let me up!” Don’t let me up.

             
“Never!” His face is so close to mine, I feel his breath on my face, his racing heart against mine. I can’t think. I don’t want to think…except for his mouth on mine. My eyes focus on his lips. When I finally look up again, his eyes are filled with desire and I know he wants the same thing. “I can’t control myself when I’m with you. I don’t want to.” His lips skim my jaw and chin.

             
I close my eyes, filling the space between us. “Then don’t.” I dig my fingers into the back of his neck, pulling him closer. “Touch me, Jackson.” My voice is soft and pleading, and so he does, all over. His hands are greedy and rough against my skin. Our bodies
are so close with very little space between us, possibly just a sliver of air and yet it’s not close enough. I run my hands up and down his chest under his shirt. We stare at each other, trying to figure out what the other is thinking.

             
I shiver when his mouth trails kisses down my neck, to my chest. A moan slips out when he moves my shirt up and his mouth follow with the barest of a caress. And then he stops. “Let’s lie here.” I look up, confused. He kisses the tip of my nose and pushes me forward. “I wanna lie here with you and hold you. Just like this.” He positions himself behind me holding my body tightly to his. I lean into him feeling safe and content.

“This
is
nice.” Bringing his hand up to my mouth, I kiss each finger and knuckle and cradle it to my chest. “Thank you for tonight.” I lean my head back to see his face. “It was perfect.” It’s the perfect night, at the perfect place, with the perfect guy.

“I’d do anything for you, Sky.” He says in my ear. “By the way, I got the money for an apartment.
I found one I liked, too.”

I turn to look at him, “Really? You mean all that overworking you did have finally paid off?” I try to be teasing, but it’s true. He’s worked his fingers to the bone and all for what?
An apartment? “When can I see it?”

“Graduation night, I’ll take you to see it. You can even have a sleepover.”

I do my best flirty smile, “Oooo, a sleepover. You’re daring.”

                                                        ***

The last few weeks of school have been easy. My exams went well. I aced most of my exams, with the exception of Spanish with a low B, the rest were all A’s. Jackson’s been working a lot, leaving us little time together. But in my mind, he’s doing it to help for when I leave. I just hope he considers going to New York with me. I want him there.

              “You’re turn, Sky.”

             
“Huh?” I give Jared a puzzled look, not having a clue what he’s talking about.

“It’s your turn to bowl.” Oh yeah, we’re bowling. I give him an apologetic smile and get up to retrieve my red ball and walk to the line. We’ve been here an hour so far. I’m kicking butt. At least I was. Taking a deep breath, I bend and throw the ball down the lane. I knock seven pins in. “Yes!” I cheer for myself. Jared cheers too. We high five and grab another ball.

“You can do this. Concentrate and aim.” I argue that this isn’t pool, and you can’t aim exactly at the pins. I get gutter balls when I do that. But I throw and walk back to the table without looking. I only got two more. Why can’t I get more strikes?

“You’re still awesome!” He hugs my shoulders. “I’m
gonna miss this.”

I pull away and sit down, watching him bounce his ball. “Don’t. I can’t handle crying, not in public.” He tries to smile. “Now, go get a strike since I can’t get one.”

We spend the next hour laughing and cheering each other on. He seems happy. And I’m happy he’s found someone to make him smile. She plans to move in a couple of weeks. Randa and Ian are moving after graduation, in four days. Monica is now on bed rest, with a little over a month to go. I wish I would be here for Baby Brayden’s birth. Monica assures me she’ll take lots of pics and email them to me.

             
“I’m all packed.” I sit on my bed the next day and look around.

             
“I can’t believe you’re leaving soon.”

             
“Me? You’re the one moving.”

             
Randa sits beside me. “Yeah, but I’ll still be in the same state. You’re gonna be gone for the summer and then moving across the world. I wish you could come to the beach.” I lay back, folding my arms behind my head. “Is Jackson really going with you?”

“I hope so. It’ll make living there and planning a future easier if we’re together. But we’re
gonna talk when I get back.”

             
She takes my hand and squeezes, “It’s gonna work out, you know. Everything will work out.”

I smile, hoping she’s right.

             
                                          ***

Graduation is anything but exciting. It’s a reflection of the last four years. I’ve waited for high school to be over since it started. Now I wish it wasn’t. I look in the crowd and see my mom, Paul and Brandon. Jared is a couple of rows in front of them with Hannah. He smiles when he sees me, so I give a subtle wave.

             
I turn back to the front and listen to Vanessa, our Valedictorian, talk about the future and how this is the first step into the unknown. I tune her out and look around at the students, wondering what their future plans are or if they even have any. My art teacher says I’ll have fun in New York, at the art school. But I might just become an art teacher, like him. I have time to decide, and I have options.

I catch Jackson turning in his seat a few rows up and when our eyes meet, he winks. I look back at the past four years, happy that it’s over, yet grateful for what I have now. We found our way back to each other and sure, it was hard seeing him with Amber, and yeah, I’d gone to bed crying many nights. Part of me hated him during those times, or at least I tried to. But I think I always knew he was still in there somewhere, just a little lost. Whatever the case, I’m glad I found him again.

When the students line up to get their diplomas, I cheer when Jackson gets his. The family is yelling his name and shouting for him. He glances back at me holds it up, smiling proudly. I see his dad wiping his eyes. I wish my dad were here too. He’d be sitting with them, sharing in this day with us.

I absentmindedly wipe my own eyes. Both
Randa and Jake, sitting in my row
,
find me and smile. Our row stands up and get in line. Almost done. I’m almost a high school graduate. Luckily our school is not that big, so we don’t have too many seniors to go through. When I get closer to the stage, I grin at Jackson. He mouths “I love you” and I do the same. I feel Amber’s hard stare even before I glance her way. I just smile at her.

             
It’s finally my turn. I climb the steps and nearly trip over my clumsy feet and reach for my diploma. We pause for a picture. My family is loud and screaming and it almost embarrasses me. I hold up my diploma and find my mom standing and clapping and yelling. I’ve made her proud…an emotional wreck, but proud.

             
“Go Skylar! Whoooo!” Jared shouts. What a great day!

             
When it’s over, I kiss my mom and all of our other friends and leave with Jackson. He’s taking me to his new apartment he just got yesterday. I’m excited and yet, a little sad that he’s not gonna be on the same street he’s lived on since forever. So both of my boys will be gone.

             
He glances at me, “You’re quiet. What are you thinking about?”

             
“Just how much everything’s changing. And how I’m scared of it.”

He takes my hand and kisses the back of it. “Remember what that wise woman once told you? That change is needed in order to grow? It’ll be good changes, Sky. Everything’s
gonna work out the way it should.”

             
Suddenly needing a topic change, I search through the stations and find a song that won’t depress me further. High school is over, it’s done. I’m a high school graduate. I’m about to embark on an uncertain journey.