Tivi's Dagger (20 page)

I glanced at him, amused. For so many years
he had firmly believed in his own mandate to preach but quickly
tired of the same behavior in others, a trait I found common to all
Protectors. Yet he had not begun to instruct Lana against the
perils of unbelief as I’d expected. Being in Methar was having an
effect on all of us, it seemed. My brother seemed actually
interested in what Lana had to say. Perhaps the healing herbs were
already having unknown effects upon his brain.

Lana laughed. “A typical belief. And it’s
true that few bother to talk to them properly, as they often appear
gruff and uncurious. But as you saw, over a few ales you may find
your eyes and mind opened in many ways despite the fact that, as a
people, they do not embrace change and in fact actively fight
against it. If you look closely, you’ll see all the traders either
wear or carry a symbol like this.” She drew a rough triangle in the
air. “It’s commonly — and mistakenly — believed to be a
representation of the mountain they’re said to originate from.”

“
What is it in fact?” Kel said,
interested. “I had not noticed such an adornment on those we
met.”

“
Their principal philosopher whose
Cautionary Tales you heard, Antrocus the Solid, said that
‘civilization’s ship may sail or sink in the swelling tide, but the
barnacle will ever thrive on the underside.’ For what better symbol
for dwarves than something small yet sturdy, which weathers all
manner of storms and still remains the same? It’s a lesson we
should note, for throughout history even as kings and nations rise
and fall in times of war and peace, you will always find dwarven
traders, and they will always be wealthy, and they will always sup
an ale with anyone who’s buying. And of course,” she reached into
her back pocket for her pouch. “They will always have the best
tobacco.”

“
Dwarven philosophy! So interesting. I
don’t believe the university has even a single book on the subject.
If only we’d had more time around the camp fire to discuss such
matters! So much knowledge in the world and yet so little time to
absorb it, and all must fit into a too-small vessel such as this!”
Kel accompanied his lament with a knock on his skull.

Brin’s eyelids were beginning to slide
downwards and he swayed a little. If I had not known him so well I
would have sworn he was drunk. He pointed over to a gap in the
trees and muttered something indistinct. There was naught where he
pointed but trees and I strained to hear what he was saying, for he
was clearly seeing something the rest of us could not.

“
Look there. It’s Sal. He’s found me
at last.” His eyes filled with a look of dull pain. “Sal, my
dearest friend. By the Gods, I’m so sorry.”

“
Brin?” Suddenly fearful, I knelt
before my brother and peered into his unfocused eyes. “What are you
saying? Look at me.”

“
I’m sorry,” he murmured again, before
slumping over the ground with his head resting on Lana’s lap. His
hand twitched for a moment before he gave a loud snore.

Lana grinned at Kari and Kel gave him a
brief clap.

“
Well done!” Kel exclaimed, and
stretched to light the candles in his lantern to add to the glow
given off by the fire. “Now I can continue my studies of the Book
of Matativi in peace, without the weight of my cousin’s disapproval
weighing upon my back.”

“
And now I can
have
peace.” Lana said, lying back against her
pack once more and sighing contentedly as she pulled at her thick
blanket. I noticed with amusement that she was tucking Brin’s hair
behind his ear and seemed content to cradle his head in her lap.
“If the clouds clear and the moon’s favorably bright, perhaps I can
continue my map of the stars. I tire of keeping Brindar occupied
with conversation, much as your brother has grown upon me since we
set out. Besides, he is in desperate need of some proper rest and
if he won’t give it to himself, then thanks to Kari.”

“
You poisoned my brother?” I said to
Kari, who had the grace to look sheepish.

“
I did not deceive him,” he said. “It
was a healing draught he drank, nothing more, made from my
grandmother’s own recipe. I may have added too much of the mushroom
pulp…but he’ll sleep very well and wake refreshed and happier in
the morning, don’t worry!”

“
Go and take Ned to the river before
the candles blow out,” Lana said with a lazy wink.

Kari took my hand and I laughed as he led me
away.

“
I can’t believe you did
that.”

“
Lana’s right. Brindar needs to rest.
He eats and sleeps little and grows more exhausted by the day, not
to mention more irritable and wearisome to talk to. I fear your
brother is carrying some great burden, my Ned.”

The little endearment made my heart
jump a little. “You don’t call me that name any more, what was
it?
Tiyal
. Why
not?”

There was just enough light from the moon
and stars to guide us as we picked our way down the short but steep
slope to a grassy patch of river bank among the high grasses and
overgrown tea plants. A thin waterfall trickled into a small pool
from which steam rose faintly and I could smell the familiar scent
of rotting eggs. My breath caught in my throat as I saw that there
was a blanket spread out there on the bank already, with some
candles burning in the shelter of some black boulders. The other
side of the river was a steep slope dark with virgin forest that
chattered and sang and groaned with life as the winds whistled
through.

“
This is a beautiful spot, is it not?”
Kari pulled me into his arms and kissed my ear.
“
Tiyal
means something
like
little brother who knows no
better
. It’s how we often describe believers of the
Thirteen, who abandoned Matativi to a sad King’s whims and never
sought to find her again.”

We sat down on the blanket together and he
touched his lips to the palm of my burnt hand. “But you have proven
yourself to be smart and brave, and I do not see you as such
anymore. I love you, my Ned. I am so thankful that you did not come
to lasting harm in the caverns of Khar Tam, for I would never have
forgiven myself. Let us bathe and wash those foul memories from our
flesh. It’s been too long since I felt the warmth of the mountains’
bellies in my bones.”

Without my brother to worry about, I soared
on a sudden eddy of happiness. My upcoming marriage be damned; this
was our time, Kari’s and mine, to enjoy as we saw fit. Too much
time had passed since our day by the Vanishing Lake and I wanted to
undress him while the candles burned strong enough to give me light
to see his lithe and handsome body. Our foreheads touched and our
lips were inches apart as my fingers found his belt and undid the
clasp. I stroked the soft furs he wore about his shoulders and
slipped them off, then brought his tunic up over his head. The air
about us was cool and he shivered a little, but as I shed my
clothes the heat between us was enough warmth for me.

When we were naked, he took my hand and we
slipped into the warm waters of the pool. Kari was right; it seemed
like an age since I had felt so warm and content. All the aches in
my body seemed to float away in the churning water. Kari threw his
head back to let the waterfall cascade soak his hair. He laughed
and spluttered as it filled his mouth and nose as well, and I
grabbed him and smoothed the soaking curls off his forehead with a
smile. He seemed to take joy in even the most simple of activities,
and it only increased my affection toward him.

We kissed languidly in the warmth, our
bodies brushing against each other. I loved the hard feel of the
muscles moving under his skin, the hair on his chest and belly,
such a different sensation from stroking the soft flesh of a woman.
He faced me and wrapped his arms and legs around me, all the time
teasing my mouth with little darts of his tongue. His prick was
hard and jousted against mine in the dark depths of the pool until
I was almost tortured with the sensation, for he would not allow me
to reach downwards until we were clean and lying on the rug once
more. I shivered with delight as the cool mountain air flowed
around my heated skin; the material was rough beneath me and the
smell of Kari’s damp hair was intoxicating. I licked some drops of
water from under his arm and he giggled.

“
Ticklish, are you?” I muttered, of a
mind to throw him on his back and dig my fingers into his ribs, but
he circled my wrists in his hands and nudged his nose against mine
before covering my mouth with his. His kisses were more forceful
than before, and I knew from the way he was touching me that he was
focused on the same activity that I had been obsessed with at his
age — sliding his prick into a welcoming hole. I had many character
flaws, but being a selfish lover was not one of them, and as his
hands began to knead my buttocks I resolved to allow him the
pleasure he had allowed me. It did not come easily, to surrender
control and lie down on my back to let him slip on top of me and
between my legs, but then he whispered my name and that simple
sound, so full of longing, undid me. My anxieties faded into the
darkness, their flames extinguished for the moment.

He helped me prepare myself with the little
vial of oil he carried, and after some more of those hot kisses I
was ready. “Go easy,” I muttered, as he began to push his slippery
prick into my body.

The pain was extraordinary and I was glad it
was dark so he could not see it all over my face. I clung to him
because I could do little else, and tried to breathe and relax as
best I could. His muscles were trembling with the effort of going
slow and I appreciated the effort. It was almost overwhelming to
feel the heat of him buried to the hilt inside me. I felt stuffed
to the brim and the stinging from my stretched flesh was almost
intolerable. I shifted as much as I could and raised my legs
higher. He kissed me then, plundering my mouth with his tongue, and
circled my nipple with his finger and thumb before pinching hard. I
let out a gasp, unable to tell if it was pleasure or pain, but it
drove my attention away from the torment below my waist until
finally, I relaxed.

He whispered to me in sibilant Methari and
nibbled my earlobe. I wrapped my arms around his body and he hooked
my legs around his. I was completely under his control and it was
an entirely new experience for me. But as he shifted position I
felt — unbelievably — a new sensation plucked deep inside like the
string of some undiscovered instrument. Waves of pleasure began to
reverberate through my body and began to blend almost deliciously
with the pain until it became something else entirely. What was
this, indeed? My prick leapt and twitched against my stomach,
suddenly hotter and harder than I’d ever known it. I held it
loosely in my hand, rubbing my thumb over the sensitive underside
just in time to Kari’s thrusts, but my mind was clouded with the
sensations he was bringing to my insides. Was this some sort of
magic? No woman I’d ever taken so had reported such a feeling.
Baffled and aroused to the point of madness I grunted and moaned as
my lover began to move faster and more deliberately. Slipping his
substantial length out to the tip then driving in hard; pulling
out, leaving me empty, only to plunge back in, breaching me again
and again and I was powerless to stop him.

I did not recognize the needy sounds that
issued from my lips as I moved against him until with some alarm I
realized that I was going to spill my seed. How was it possible? My
whole body tensed as I felt it come, not just from my prick but
somewhere deep inside. I sank my teeth into Kari’s shoulder and I
could not stop myself from crying out as it shot up my belly.
Finally, when my muscles relaxed once more, I flopped bonelessly
back onto the rug, almost terrified by the intensity of what I’d
just felt. My whole body was tingling with pleasure and my heart
thumped against my ribs. Kari stiffened above me and then crashed
down into my arms with a sigh. Seconds later, I felt his seed
trickling out of my body and I stroked his hair as he murmured my
name and we both struggled to catch our breath.

“
What,” I gasped finally. “What did
you do?”

He rolled off me and onto his side,
breathing heavily. “I made love to you, Ned, as you did to me.”

“
Have you used some sort of
magic?”

When he spoke again, I could hear the smile
in his voice. “If love is magic, then that is what I used.”

He wrapped his arms around me and nuzzled my
ear, and his body kept me warm. It was almost comforting to be held
so tightly, but I was unsettled and bewildered by the whole
experience. I felt like a coconut that had fallen from a tree onto
a rock — cracked open and exposed — and was suddenly consumed by a
shame springing from an unknown source deep inside. No matter how
much I had tried to convince myself over the years that I was a
modern and open-minded man of Lis, the moral instruction taught to
me in my childhood by the Protectors seemed to linger, threaded
through my thoughts like veins of silver in dense rock caves,
easily chipped away but not so easily eradicated, the very same
teachings that had caused me to back away from enjoying the
magnificent captain back in the Pirates’ Isles. For here I was,
locked in the embrace of one who truly loved me, and yet hesitating
once again. I found I did not know my own mind — nor my own body —
as well as I had believed.

What was wrong with me, all of a sudden?

I loosed myself from Kari’s arms and sat up,
wiping my stomach and shoulders of my emissions. There was even
some in my hair. “I think I’ll bathe again. I’m sweaty and
sticky.”