The Three Sisters (42 page)

Despite these complaints, these people were lucky they were not the three sisters, for once the Festivities were finished, the three mortal minchen would have no life to return to. It was now December
24
, and by tomorrow, Coito, Theodora, and Regina would
be dead.

CHAPTER XVIII

“Let us eat and drink, for tomorrow we
shall die.”

–
Isaiah
22
:
13

’s alarm went off in the three unassoiled sisters’ cell for the last time at
6
:
01
A.M. on December
24
,
1979
. This would be the last full day of their lives, and the three supine sisters did not want to waste the few hours remaining to them by trying to outdo Oblomov. The three sisters’ entire day had been meticulously planned by them that the eve of the Festivities might be spent as usefully (Victor would have said as efficiently)
as possible.

The day was planned as follows. After allowing an hour to eat, shower, and prepare themselves for the day, the three would have an hour of free time before they faced thirty minutes of torture from inquisitive news reporters at eight. From nine to twelve the three would be free to receive any guests whom they had placed on their list of possible visitors. The noon hour was set aside for lunch. From one to two reporters would be allowed a final opportunity to ask the three sisters what their thoughts were now that the end was at hand. From two to five-thirty the three’s relatives and close friends would be allowed a final visit. After this, the three sisters would enjoy their final pleasures on Earth during their two-hour long Last Supper (“Our sinful cynical Cenacle,” as K called it). Provided the three stayed in their cell, they were to be allowed any number of visitors with whom they would have absolute freedom and complete privacy to do as they pleased. “It was our favorite part of the Festivities,”
said Regina.

With the exception of brief liberties taken with visitors, the three would be able to enjoy their first uninhibited sexual ecstasies in seven months of enclosure. “They were just letting us get rid of our sexual anxieties so we’d behave on TV,” deduced Coito. The silent guards guarding and pious priests praying were to withdraw from the building during the two-hour celebration so the three condemned criminals would have complete freedom to indulge themselves in every perversion they could perpetrate. The three former nuns could order any foods or other amusements they needed to ensure that they and their guests would remember their two hours of disportment for the rest of their lives, limited though they may be. The only restriction upon their last supper was that anyone who attended the cynical Cenacle had to arrive at six P.M. and not leave until eight P.M. Visitors would not be allowed to enter and leave at
their leisure.

At nine P.M., television crews would begin setting up the equipment for the portion of the Festivities to be broadcast from the three’s cell. At eleven, cosmeticians and other “personal technicians” would provide the three sisters with everything from the right makeup for the TV cameras to sedatives to minimize the pain they were to suffer during the Festivities (“As if that would make any difference,” bemoaned Theodora). At midnight, Detective Hole would arrive at the three sisters’ cell and the Festivities would
officially begin.

The morning news conference went like clockwork since the three had been able to anticipate all but a couple questions. This pattern repeated itself in the afternoon news conference when a different set of reporters interviewed them. Despite Coito’s recent reconsideration of her sarcastic ways, she still made snide attacks on the Festivities and its supporters, partially to cover up her true feelings, partially out of habit, but mainly because “reporters always bring out the cynic in me,” as she put it.

Theodora used the news conferences to plug her book and give her final thoughts on the Festivities while Regina surprised the reporters by being as sprightly and spirited as she had ever been. Regina said she regretted not having gotten her chance to be in the movies (“Even Trotsky got to be a movie actor,” she complained at the morning news conference), but she thought the Festivities made up for this disappointment by giving her as much exposure as she ever would have received from starring in the movies. “After all, what other actress has had a national holiday dedicated to her?” she asked a reporter at the afternoon
news conference.

The three had already prepared a list of people they would see on December
24
to expedite the bureaucratic delays which usually accompanied a visit to the three sequestered sisters. Though hundreds of Festivities celebrants waited to see the three in person, only K and Co.’s closest friends were placed on their list of expected visitors. Despite these restrictions, at any one time there were usually more visitors than the three’s cell could hold and the three’s friends were often forced to mill around in the hallway leading to the three’s cell. More than once the silent guards guarding had to intervene to maintain order in the hallway and on a couple occasions even had to speak to
the visitors.

“We could have sneaked out of our cells it was so chaotic,” K told a reporter, “but we knew we’d never get ten feet once we left the building, so we decided to be law-abiding citizens, stay in our cell, and
enjoy ourselves.”

Most of the three’s visitors were friends from the Kennedy Center or participants in more memorable platonic orgies. Since the three had lost track of most of their college classmates when they had entered the convent, only a few friends from college visited them. The others who saw the three were either close friends they had met on diverse and sundry occasions or famous individuals who had taken an interest in the three during the Confessions or the Trial of
the Millennium.

The only other visitors the three received were members of their families. Theodora’s parents and brother visited her, but the Suoras concentrated on discussing trivialities rather than the Festivities lest the painful subject dominate the already sober visit. Regina’s parents and sister saw her and found Regina as happy and vivacious as ever. In fact, Regina ended up going out of her way to cheer up her parents.

Coito’s mother visited K as did her two sisters, but her father refused to leave Chicago. K’s two sisters by birth met both of K’s cloistered sisters, but it was evident that K was closer to the two sisters whom she had befriended than the two she had grown up with. Though not the family reunion they had planned, it focused Coito’s mind on what might have been, but had not. Former Catholic Father Landus visited as child-raising father Larry Landus so he and K could find out what had happened to each since parting their ways in the hills
of Appalachia.

People came and went during the six-and-a-half hours the three were allowed visitors, and sooner than the three wished, they discovered it was five-thirty and time for the visitors to leave. But this also meant that in thirty minutes the most interesting part of the Festivities, and the least likely to be broadcast, would commence, namely, the
cynical Cenacle.

Everyone condemned to death is provided a lavish last meal by the State as a gesture of goodwill. Thanks to the good offices of Victor Virga, the three smart girls were allowed to satisfy both their edacious and concupiscent desires on December
24
in their final feast before the Festivities began. The three’s choices of delectable delights would not be limited to what could fill their stomachs or build their bodies, however, for what good would a properly balanced diet do for a corpse? After seven months, what the three nympho nuns wanted was something to satisfy their rosebuds, not their
taste buds.

The erstwhile nuns placed three demands upon their
military guards:

1
) Allow seven of their favorite male companions to be locked inside the cell with them so the three concupiscent Catholics might commit unrestricted congress
with them.

2
) Provide Theodora’s full menu of specialty dishes to be prepared by the finest chefs in the city to fulfill their opsomanic desire for edacious delectable delights so the three sisters’ last supper might also be their finest and proof they could survive the
consecrated corsned.

3
) Leave the three completely alone with their seven male companions and specially ordered dishes for two hours. No matter how loud the screams of ecstasy were, no one was to interfere with or intervene in their final opportunity to indulge their
every fantasy.

If Benny Ditkus could have joined the devirginating demonesses that evening, he would have done so without hesitation, but the military would have denied Regina a final constuprating coital conquest, knowing that if this liberty were ever leaked to the public, a scandal would certainly ensue. The cherry-merry cynical Cenacle which Benny would have hoped for
never occurred.

At ten to six, the food and men were brought into the cell for the Mother, Daughter and Holy Ghostess to feast upon. At five to six, all the silent guards guarding and pious priests praying left the building that the three might consume in peace. At six, Coito said grace (“Good food, good meat, good God, let’s eat!”) and the three sisters and their seven chosen partners plunged into the food and into one another with
total abandon.

The three’s sexual desires, diminished only by the few passing liberties with male visitors they had furtively stolen, exploded in an orgy of lust that was unparalleled by anything the three had ever experienced before. It was a thoroughly disgusting experience which pleased all. Like sailors returning from several months on the high seas, the three did not even allow their victims the opportunity to properly undress, but ripped the men’s clothes off that they would not waste a single precious second and could begin preying upon their seven sexual subjects immediately. Caring not what others thought, the three licentious ladies and their mentulate men let out screams of pleasure and delight which echoed through the building and outside. The priests praying prayed ever
more fervently.

An ill-informed visitor, not knowing the origin of the three’s agonies and ecstasies, might have thought the three strepitous sisters had finally been brought before the Spanish Inquisition, so loud was the cacaphonous commotion which the sinners sinning gleefully produced. But instead of being tortured, the three sisters were dutifully committing and attempting every sin which the Inquisition had condemned. “‘Twas no Inquisition, but an inquination,”
coined Theodora.

Only the two-hour time constraint and the slow recovery of the males kept the three from committing all the sins they could think of. Every perverted position, every sinful kind of scortation, every tantalizing game (“Playing strip poker in jail was becoming habit-forming,” K commented), every degenerate device which they knew of to give themselves pleasure was prepared and perpetrated to perfection. “If they had given us three hours, the men would’ve died of heart attacks,”
promised Coito.

At eight on the dot, the silent guards guarding re-entered the desecrated building and caught the orgiasts
in flagrante delicto
to none of the participants’ shame. The food was virtually untouched. The room was a shambles. The men looked like they had just run a marathon. The three sisters
were smiling.

Five minutes later the fornicators had departed. The men were carried out on stretchers and the three nuns were sent to the showers to cleanse themselves, though more for the sake of the TV cameras than any Biblical pronouncements on being pure in the sight of the Lord. “Our own showers were in an open room with four shower heads sticking out. K called them ‘gang-bang showers,’ though they never served that purpose,” explained Theodora. While the three were bathing, crews were sent in to clean up the minor disaster area which their cell had become so the national viewing audience would never suspect the sundry sins the three had
just committed.