The Lost Soul Trilogy (Primani Book 5) (8 page)

I was about to go to the house for some food when the rain started coming down in sheets. It sounded like a hurricane out there. Lightning flashed through the window, and the thunder was deafening. The light flickered but stayed on. I groaned out loud. I’m starving to death in here, and as I’m made of sugar, I can’t risk the rain. I settled for a granola bar and an apple. The mini-fridge was almost empty. I had some fruit and a couple of bottles of water left. My phone buzzed. It was Janet asking if I was okay over here. Yes, I said. I’m fine. I have enough food to last a little while. She laughed at me and told me to stay inside because it was going to be really bad tonight. She didn’t want me trying to drive in the storm. I promised her I’d stay in. Now I was worried about Domino. It was getting worse outside, and I was getting lonely. I sent a text to Sean and put on some Pink Floyd.

Journal Entry: 26 Jun

What to do about Sean? He’s amazing. He’s gentle and strong. He’s soft and hard. He’s protective, and he’s dangerous. He’s scaring me to death, but I can’t stay away. He brings light into my heart. My body’s on fire every time I’m near him. I can’t even imagine what being naked with him would be like. His body is ridiculous! I want to do things with him that I’m pretty sure aren’t even legal. I’m falling more in love with him and it should scare me… but it doesn’t.

A flash lit up the window outside just as someone pounded on the door. Expecting to see Sean, I yanked it open. My face fell like a rock. Oh,
yay
! What was
he
doing here? Without a word, Killian rudely pushed past me into the apartment. He carefully put Domino down. She shook herself off and pranced over to give me some love.

“Why are
you
here? Where’s Sean? Is he okay?”

He didn’t bother to answer my questions. Instead, he surveyed the room like he was planning to stay. He made a circuit from one end to the other, taking time to look at the pictures on the wall, the flowers in the little pottery cup, and the jewelry box my mother gave me. He actually smiled a little when he touched the tiny Dalmatian. Domino rubbed against him like a cat, and he gave her a strangely gentle pat on the head.

Before I could protest, he picked up my journal, glanced at the last page, and shook his head. “You have absolutely no sense of self-preservation. Your instincts are
right
, Mica! Why don’t you trust them? You
should
be scared. What you’re thinking is dangerous and to others besides you and Sean.”

I flew at him, trying to grab the journal. “Give me that, you animal! You have no right coming in here!”

Easily sidestepping me, he tossed the little book onto the bed with a cold laugh. “It won’t work, you know. You two will not be allowed to stay together.”

“What? Says who?”

“He has a job to do, and he will eventually have to leave here. We all will. You’re going to get hurt if you keep up these silly fantasies. There is no happily ever after.”

“I’m not going to argue with you. This is between Sean and me. If you don’t like it, stay away from us. Now get the fuck out!”

There was another flash of lightning and a crash of thunder rattled the windows. Domino started barking. I jumped out of my skin, and the lights went out. She was still barking when I finally turned on a flashlight and looked around for Killian. He was gone.

Chapter 7: Lost and Found

“SHOULD WE CALL NOAH?” I asked Dani.

“Seems like a good idea! Hey, I gotta get to work. Call me later?” She disconnected, and I frowned at the phone. I was bored. I really, really hated being bored.

The rain came down so hard and for so long that I considered building an ark. The stormy weather lasted for days, and I had had enough. The walls started closing in on me so I went for a drive with Domino riding shotgun. She hopped in and stuck her nose under the seatbelt. I strapped her in so she’d be safe. I turned the car towards Giant Mountain. The rain was still coming down but not too hard. I stopped at a convenience store for water and a bag of chips. Okay, so not too healthy, but I was depressed. Depression called for chips. And chocolate, but I didn’t have enough money for both. Domino eyed my purchases with approval. G
ood call on
the chips.

I let my mind wander as I sang along to the music. It had been a long week. After Killian left, I tried to reach Sean, but he didn’t answer his phone. I left a message: just one. No way was I leaving a bunch of whiny messages. I had been hurt too much already, and I wasn’t going to let Sean hurt me too. Yes, I really liked him. And yes, I was pretty sure I was in love with him. But I wasn’t so far gone yet that I was going to curl up and cry over him. Besides, I was more confused than ever. Killian’s words echoed in my memory.
He has a job to do, and he will eventually have to leave here. We all will. You’re going to get hurt if you keep up these silly fantasies.

What was he talking about? What ‘job?’ Did this have something to do with their parents’ work? I doubted Sean told Killian what he’d shared with me about that. Maybe Killian was making up the ‘job’ to cover up something else. That was a possibility. He wouldn’t tell me the truth, so maybe he just made up something. I didn’t know what to believe. One thing was true though: Killian didn’t like the idea of me and Sean as a couple. That didn’t make a lot of sense either. I tried to come up with reasons for that attitude. I came up empty. I had no idea. It was just weird.

I pictured Killian’s cold face one last time before shoving it to the back of my mind with extreme prejudice. I was sick of him. I pictured another face, not cold, but very warm. Sean. He showed up uninvited in my life, messed with my head, and left me without even saying good-bye. Jerk. I wasn’t even able to stay very mad at him. I was just… just through. I was
so
over him.

By the time we got close to the mountain, my mind was clear again. The mountains always put things back into perspective. After all, I was just one tiny being loose in this great wilderness. I wasn’t that important to the grand scheme of things. Nature would swallow me up if was careless or unlucky. She didn’t care about fate or destiny or happy endings.

The view was beautiful here. It was pretty even in the heavy mist. The mountain was across the road; the trailhead just visible through the trees. Did I want to hike? The weather wasn’t great. Maybe I could simply sit in the car and soak up the peace and quiet. Wait a minute. Is that a lake? It was hard to tell because there was a tree branch in the way. I rolled down the window and stuck my head out. I still couldn’t tell.

“Come on, Princess. Let’s go check it out.”

I threw on my waterproof jacket and grabbed the snacks. We picked our way down a little trail and stopped to admire the view. In front of us was a tiny blue lake. It had a small sandy beach on one end, a sheer granite wall on the side, and forest bordering the far end. The lake’s surface was roiling in the rain right now and didn’t look inviting. It looked really deep, and I conjured up Nessie in my head. The wind was blowing through the trees, the clouds heavy overhead. I could imagine all kinds of mystical creatures showing up. I tried to visualize how perfect it would appear on a clear day. The sun would sparkle off the water which would be a deep rich blue. That reminded me of Sean’s eyes. Sigh. I missed him. Where was he?

There was a trail leading from the beach to the forest closest to where I was parked. It was still early, and I was still bored so it seemed like a good idea to check out the trail. It was easy to get to and the ground was flat here. We should be safe enough. Domino was daintily picking her way over the puddles, sniffing everything in sight. When we got farther into the trees I stopped to get my bearings. Wow, it was pretty in here. The foliage was vividly green and shiny with rain. The smell of wet leaves was almost overpowering. I imagined elves living here and had a Tolkien moment before moving on. It was beautiful but kind of creepy. A flash of lightning threw shadows around us and a loud rumble of thunder broke the misty silence. Uh-oh, not good. Time to find the car.

I walked a good way when I realized I should’ve hit the sandy beach by now. The rocks and trees looked the same as the heavy rain distorted everything. I couldn’t find a single landmark that stuck out. I stood still for a minute and willed myself not to panic.

“How about you use your Superdog senses to find the car?” I asked the canine.

She shook some water out of her ears
. What am I, a compass? S
he stiffened a little and sniffed at the air. She trotted over to a brushy area across from us. She came out again and woofed at me. It turned out to be a little sheltered space under a rocky overhang. The brush had hidden the front of it. It wasn’t a cave but at least it was protected from the weather and was actually still dry. We squeezed in and sat against a rock. I was exhausted and starting to get cold. I shared some water with Domino and gave her some chips too. I figured we wouldn’t be trapped here forever and we could find our way out when the storm moved on. What time was it anyway? I pulled out my cell phone and was crushed to see it was 5:30 and that I had no signal: two very bad things.

Domino shivered against my side. I draped my jacket over her and hugged her to me. My poor baby! It was getting darker out and the storm hadn’t let up yet. Thunder echoed in the valley and there were lightning strikes close by. The air smelled like ozone. I was starting to worry now. How on earth was I going to get out of here in the dark? I couldn’t believe I didn’t grab my backpack. I had a flashlight and some other things in it. It was in the trunk of the car. How stupid was I? Ugh. My survival gear consisted of the stuff that was in my jacket pockets: Chap Stick, dead phone, keys, tissues, and a lint-covered piece of gum. I was out of ideas. It was too dark to wander around the woods hoping to find the beach. I couldn’t call anyone. No one knew where we were either… Oh, Jesus, that was bad. We would have to spend the night here and try again in the morning. We’d better hope my sense of direction is better tomorrow. If not, we were so screwed.

I fell asleep from sheer boredom. I was sitting there thinking about my life and the crazy turns it’s taken over the past year. So much had happened and most of it was not good. Sean was the one bright spot I could see. I was daydreaming about him when I dozed off.

I wandered aimlessly through the forest. It was still raining, but I was warm in my dream. Muffling the sound of the rain, the gauzy mist filled the spaces between the trees. My bare feet were scratched and bleeding. I lurched and stumbled in exhaustion. My body was too heavy to move. I wanted to lie down and sleep, but I was afraid I would die if I did that. So I kept moving. I
had
to keep moving. I had to find what I was looking for.

A shadow moved. Something ran past. An unholy stench surrounded me like a rank fog. Instinct took over, and I ran. The shadow kept just out of sight, spurring me forward in my panic. I ran blindly at first, crashing through trees and scratching myself, but then I saw it--a faint glow in the mist. I knew that light! I’d seen it before--it meant safety. I ran towards it. Please don’t leave! I need you! The rank smell was suddenly closer, and I could hear ragged breathing behind me. I was frantic now and running for more than just my life. I ran for my sanity or maybe my soul…

The light slowed down. For once, it didn’t move away; it didn’t drift out of sight, or vanish from my eyes. It hovered some distance in front of me. The dark shadow grew distinct in the growing light, and I saw it was a huge dark beast. It was misshapen but powerfully built with long claws on its paws, eyes glittering brilliant red. It paced me as I ran. I sprinted toward the light and the glow expanded to fill the clearing. The light was so intense that it blinded me, but I kept running directly at it. I was too afraid of the beast to stop. Its claws raked my back as I threw myself forward into the light. It closed around me, and everything else disappeared.

I woke up on the beach with my faithful pooch whimpering and nudging at my arm. I lumbered to my feet and practically ran to the car. This forest wasn’t peaceful any longer. My spidey senses were tingling on overtime. It was time to run.

The sound of the deadbolt slamming home was the sweetest sound I’d heard all day. After a long, long shower, I crawled into bed. I expected to fall asleep immediately, but my brain wouldn’t quiet down. I snuggled with Domino and thought about all the things that had happened to us that day. I had started out angry and hurt because of Sean and Killian. I felt wonder and enchantment at the discovery of the beautiful lake and the misty forest. I’d felt fear at getting lost, and then terror during the nightmare. Yet somehow, I managed to find the way back to the beach… while apparently unconscious… That’s a bit of a stretch for me on my own. I gave that some thought.

When I was lost and scared today, I did not think to pray. It didn’t occur to me to ask God to help me. I hadn’t expected His help because I didn’t believe He was there for me anymore. I was left to fend for myself. This year taught me that I was alone in my world, and I had to take care of myself. But what happened today? What or who helped me find the way back to the beach? What was the light in my dreams? I opened my heart, and I knew the answer. It was right in front of me. I smiled at the face in my mind. And for the first time in nearly a year, I prayed to God and thanked Him for saving my life today.