The Good Vibrations Guide to Sex (66 page)

To get in the mood, think back to your own first sweet encounter with sexual imagery. Many a youth’s surprise sexual awakening resulted from exposure to images depicting everything from hints of a sexual undercurrent to explicit behavior.

I remember getting turned on by the first romance novel I bought at a drugstore when I was 13. I think I read it a thousand times and creamed my pants every time. I still love to read about people’s (particularly women’s) sexual experiences and fantasies.

I saw a
Playboy
photo with a woman with flour on her pussy; she was supposed to be a cookie going into the oven. I was 11, and I wanted to try this because it turned me on so I got baby powder and put it all over my pussy. I got so excited by this, I started to explore myself. I played with my cunt until I came. I had no idea what was happening, but it was fun!

It seems as if everyone has a memory of stumbling on a cache of porn or smutty novel under a family member’s bed—it almost makes one believe in a porn Santa who delivers little bundles to both the naughty and the nice. Remember the bra ads in the Sears catalog or those passages from dog-eared Victorian novels? Now you’re in the proper frame of mind to read about today’s options in the world of porn. At the end of this book you’ll find a bibliography of erotic books and videos, so you can finally retire that beat-up old copy of the
Sports Illustrated
swimsuit edition and try something new.

Before launching into a description of the various types of explicit material available, we’d like to confess that we find efforts to discriminate between “erotica” and “porn” pointless at best and tedious at worst. The only criteria Good Vibrations has for selecting the erotic books and X-rated videos we carry is that consenting adults produced them with the goal of inspiring sexual arousal. If what you read or view gets you off, you may call it what you will.

While we use the terms “erotica,” “porn,” and “smut” interchangeably, we frequently refer to written works as “erotica” and to films or videos as “porn.” This is purely a convenience, and we certainly don’t mean to imply any moral or aesthetic judgment in doing so. Consumers, reviewers, and media people who discuss sexually explicit materials often seem compelled to make distinctions between “good” erotica, which is defined as displaying literary or artistic merit, and “bad” smut, which is defined as hopeless trash. Needless to say, these distinctions are purely subjective—one person’s sublime erotic literature is bound to be another’s tawdry smut.

The bottom line in assessing the value of “erotica” or “porn” must be: Does it arouse you? People who critique a piece of erotic writing or an X-rated video without divulging whether or not it turned them on are missing the point. Of course, it’s challenging to speak openly about our sexual desires and appetites—it’s much safer to criticize a story’s clumsy plot device or a video’s poor lighting than to confess to the fact that it got us wet. It takes courage to recognize and cop to what makes you hot, but once you do you end up with a clear, honest picture of yourself, along with the ability to name—and claim—your desire. And, your recommended reading/viewing list will be a much-sought-after resource among your friends!

Knowing what turns you on will help if you’re searching for “hot” books or videos. Customers often ask us to recommend titles. We ply them with any number of questions in our attempts to discover what they’re more likely to enjoy. Refer to our Erotica Shopping Checklist (see sidebar) before you venture into a store.

My sister and I swap erotic literature because any group of thirty short stories will give us each about five winners.

Keep in mind that one person’s arousing read is another’s certified snooze. If you’re not sure what kinds of sexual activities you’ll like to read about or see portrayed, think about what sorts of fantasies work for you, or try to recall the last movie or book you read that elicited some kind of erotic response. By all means explore a variety of materials—your libido may be two steps ahead of your conscious mind. Erotic anthologies and compilation videos are great ways to sample a variety of styles, themes, and activities without going broke investing in a library of sexually explicit materials.

Finally, we want to point out that plenty of written erotica, explicit photos, adult video clips, and other forms of sexual entertainment are now available on the World Wide Web. We explore the Web’s sexual offerings further in the following chapter, but in this chapter we focus on more traditional media.

Books

Whether you want to read alone to get yourself “in the mood,” recite erotic passages to your lover or reenact scenes from what you’re reading, the printed word has tremendous potential to inspire our sex lives. It can transform everyday sex into a euphoric communion or fuel your fantasies with people, places, and positions you might never have dreamed up yourself.

A Little History

When Good Vibrations first opened its doors, our erotica selection could fit on one shelf—Anaïs Nin, Henry Miller, and classics of Victorian porn were about all that was available. These days, it’s difficult to keep up with the abundance of titles published every year.

The same social changes that allowed Good Vibrations to flourish—the women’s movement, the gay right’s movement, and increased public discourse about sexuality due to the AIDS epidemic—converged to usher new voices and a diversity of subject matter onto bookstore shelves. The advent of desktop publishing in the early eighties democratized print production, and independent presses and ’zines sprang up all over the country. At the same time, the so-called feminist porn wars were inspiring women on both sides of the debate (is porn inherently degrading to woman, or not?) to identify their sexual desires, explore their sexual fantasies, and produce sexually explicit materials of their own.

Independent presses were pioneers in publishing representations of authentic sexual experiences and creating content for and by previously marginalized communities. Those writers who developed followings appealed to specific audiences appreciating specific themes—for example, John Preston spoke to gay men, Pat Califia explored lesbian and S/M sex, and Lonnie Barbach captured the straight market. As erotica caught on, mainstream publishers wanted in on the action and began offering up rather tame literary collections of sexual passages.

By the late nineties, the Web was facilitating the distribution and marketing of sexually explicit materials. With its anonymity, ease of communication, and largely censorship-free permissiveness, the Web united aspiring writers with voracious readers so that they could explore the depths of their fantasy lives together. As a result, the erotic fiction being written and published by both large and small houses reflects an even greater range of human sexual experience and fantasy, tends to defy stereotypes and expectations based on gender or orientation, and constantly seeks to uncover new ground, rather than repeat formulaic material.

Since we published the first edition of this book, we’ve seen various themes dominate the erotica market, only to give way to an entirely different fascination a year or two later. The proliferation of online erotica means that thematic trends tend to come and go even more quickly. Susie Bright, who reads thousands of erotica stories a year, describes the popular trends as of this writing: “Uncovering the sexual in communities that have never been treated erotically before. Recalling the sexual identity of young people, at a time when young people’s sexuality is so taboo. Stories about working in the sex business. Going to hell and back. Viagra jokes, antidepressant jokes. Independent women making non-TV type decisions about their sex lives. Stories that aren’t easily cast as gay or straight.”

The net result for erotica book buyers is greater selection and more diverse content. Whereas once women’s erotica might’ve portrayed a very narrow slice of female sexuality, today you’ll find gender-bending, power play, multiple partners, and broken taboos. Whereas once you might’ve been thrilled to find a single story about bisexuality, today you’ll find entire anthologies, even series, devoted to a specific theme, orientation, or sexual activity.

Where to Shop for Books

If your neighborhood bookstore is a chain, they may or may not stock erotica, depending on where you live. Even if your chain carries erotica, the books can be hard to find. We’ve rarely seen erotic fiction displayed in a section all its own. If it’s mixed in with the rest of the fiction, you either have to browse through thousands of titles or know the name or author of a specific book. Maybe the erotica is shelved with the nonfiction sex books, but these are equally difficult to track down. If you’re truly lucky, your store will have a sexuality section, which may include erotica. Unfortunately, many stores shelve sex books in their general “health” section and you usually won’t find fiction there. One more drawback: Chains tend to carry books published by mainstream houses, which results in a limited selection since most of the more diverse material is published by smaller presses.

If you live in a larger town or city, you might have more luck with alternative bookstores, gay or lesbian bookstores, or sex boutiques like Good Vibrations. The owners are often more open-minded about sex, or at least willing to listen to customer recommendations. And if you want to keep the chains from ruling the book world, it’s nice to support the little guys. They also tend to feature titles from smaller presses, so you’ve got a better chance of seeing a bit more variety in your erotica.

Mail-order and online catalogs and book clubs can be a good source of erotica. Some online book retailers specialize in sex (the Venus Book Club), while others carry such a large inventory (
Amazon.com
) that you’ll have little problem finding something to order. Sites like
Amazon.com
often post customer reviews, which can help you figure out whether something suits your tastes.

Fiction

There is a wealth of erotic fiction available today in nearly every genre—science fiction, horror, epic romance, among many others. Some folks prefer the subtle or romantic, while others want access to the explicit language of sex; it is the latter that we’ll focus on here. The bulk of erotic fiction appears in short-story anthologies (many authors) or collections (one author), though full-length novels are catching up. Some novels claim to be “sexy,” but be wary, since this is a common advertising ploy, and in reality the sexual content is often microscopic or nonexistent.

In the following section, we’ll briefly identify some notable erotica genres. For specific titles and authors, please see our bibliography. For up-to-the-minute recommendations, contact any of the book catalogers in our resource listings. The following publishers are reliable sources of innovative erotica: Down There Press, which publishes the
Herotica
series; Simon & Schuster, which publishes the
Best American Erotica
series; Cleis Press, which publishes a myriad of erotica series, including
Best Gay Erotica, Best Lesbian Erotica, Best Women’s Erotica, Best Black Women’s Erotica,
and
Best Bisexual Women’s Erotica;
Alyson Publications, which publishes gay and lesbian erotica; Black Lace, which publishes steamy novels for women by women; and Circlet Press, which publishes science fiction erotica.

WOMEN’S EROTICA:

I like erotica written by women, especially if they have the courage to be explicit and the ability to write well.

Erotic fiction penned by women includes stories published by both large and small presses that reflect a variety of themes, characters, and sexual tastes. Tales written by and about large women, stories of lesbians losing their virginity, and erotic musings by women of color are just a few examples of how real-life diversity is finally being reflected in the growing body of sexual literature.

I like reading erotica/porn for women that incorporates all sexual orientations. If it was just for straight women, I wouldn’t feel that I exactly related, and ditto books for lesbians. The
Herotica
series is good.

Not surprisingly, you will definitely find greater representation of female sexual experience (that’s ladies’ orgasms too, please) in women’s erotica than you will in some other genres.

I love anything with passionate kissing, romance paired with intimate connection, an element of teasing and unexpected sexual daring, and sauciness and insatiability/eagerness on the part of the woman.

You can also expect more variety in sexual orientation, age, ethnicity, body size, and sexual preferences.

Particularly in the earlier women’s erotica from the eighties, the term “erotic” was somewhat loosely applied. Some material billed as erotica is less explicit than a “Dear Abby” column, so browse before buying. However, editors, publishers, and consumers of women’s erotica have noticed an evolution in the genre. In its early days women’s erotica reflected more of a hearts-and-flowers romanticism, but today’s fiction busts out in every direction with no taboo unbroken and no sexual pairing untried. Says
Best American Erotica
editor Susie Bright: “Mainstream publishers still think that women and men’s tastes in literature are utterly and eternally separate. Meanwhile, the radicals who started feminist erotica in the seventies and early eighties are bored with the early depiction of their desires…it seems babyish to them now. The hipsters of erotica are really looking for something that is beyond stereotypes.”

GAY PORN: As you might expect, male sexuality is front and center in gay porn, authored primarily by men—but with plenty of women covering this territory as well (Anne Rice and Carol Queen for example). Perhaps because it rarely confuses its priorities—one-handed reading is as important as the quality of the writing (often more so)—gay porn never fails to deliver what it promises: no-holds-barred graphic depictions of sex. Consequently, there has always been a large market for gay male porn (both written and visual), whose fans include a growing number of lesbians and straight women. You don’t have to look farther than the nearest gay bookstore to find volumes of gay sex writing featuring surfers, body builders, truck drivers, leather daddies, and urban professionals