The Click Trilogy (13 page)

From: Mark Finlay – May 8, 2011 – 9:02 PM

To: Renee Greene

Subject: It’s Official

Okay, I’m officially online.  Will keep you posted.

From: Mark Finlay – May 10, 2011 – 10:09 AM

To: Renee Greene

Subject: Busy Tonight?

What are you doing tonight?  Can we meet for a coffee (or in your case a blended)?

From: Renee Greene – May 10, 2011 – 10:15 AM

To: Mark Finlay

Subject: Re: Busy Tonight?

I’m free tonight.  What did you have in mind?

From: Mark Finlay – May 10, 2011 – 10:20 AM

To: Renee Greene

Subject: Re: Busy Tonight?

I’m overwhelmed.  Not emotionally with flattery, but physically overwhelmed.  I got 16 emails between last night and this morning after posting my bio.

From: Renee Greene – May 10, 2011 – 10:22 AM

To: Mark Finlay

Subject: Re: Busy Tonight?

16!  That’s got to be some kind of record, wouldn’t you say?

From: Mark Finlay – May 10, 2011 – 10:25 AM

To: Renee Greene

Subject: Re: Busy Tonight?

I’ve printed out all of their emails, bios and photos and sorted them into piles of yes, no and maybe.  Hoping I can review with you.

From: Renee Greene – May 10, 2011 – 10:27 AM

To: Mark Finlay

Subject: Re: Busy Tonight?

You got it.  I’ll meet you at 8:00.  This should be fun.

From: Renee Greene – May 10, 2011 – 10:33 AM

To: Shelley Manning

Subject: Certifiable, no?

So, Mark
FINALLY
got his bio and photo up yesterday and already has 16 women emailing him interested in talking/meeting, etc.  That’s the good news.

The bad news: I’ve agreed to meet him tonight because, as he writes, “I’ve printed out all of their emails, bios and photos and sorted them into piles of yes, no and maybe.  Hoping I can review with you.”

From: Shelley Manning – May 10, 2011 – 1:15 PM

To: Renee Greene

Subject: Re: Certifiable, no?

16 women interested in Finlay?  I’m shocked.  Completely shocked.  Didn’t realize there were that many desperate ladies in LA.  What’s less shocking is that he’s “sorted them” into piles and needs to review them with you.  What is his problem?!?  What made you agree to reviewing Finlay’s Fans?

From: Renee Greene – May 10, 2011 – 1:28 PM

To: Shelley Manning

Subject: Re: Certifiable, no?

Well, if I recall correctly, you hooked up with him, no?

And, he asked if I was free before I understood why he wanted to meet.  But honestly, I think this will be fun.  Kind of intrigued to see what women are saying to attract his interest.

From: Shelley Manning – May 10, 2011 – 1:36 PM

To: Renee Greene

Subject: Re: Certifiable, no?

That was low, sweetie.  You’re lucky I love you.  Otherwise, that would be grounds for dissolution of the friendship.

Regarding your plans for tonight, I think we have different ideas of what “fun” is.  But, I’m kind of curious to hear what types of SOBER women are interested in Finlay.  You’ll give me the scoop later.

From: Renee Greene – May 10, 2011 – 1:42 PM

To: Shelley Manning

Subject: Re: Certifiable, no?

Sorry.  Couldn’t resist.  Seriously, Mark is a great guy.  He’s smart, successful, good looking. He just happens to be a bit…particular…about certain things.

From: Shelley Manning – May 10, 2011 – 1:43 PM

To: Renee Greene

Subject: Re: Certifiable, no?

The boy is so anal!

From: Renee Greene – May 10, 2011 – 1:44 PM

To: Shelley Manning

Subject: Re: Certifiable, no?

And…

From: Shelley Manning – May 10, 2011 – 1:44 PM

To: Renee Greene

Subject: Re: Certifiable, no?

And…What?

From: Renee Greene – May 10, 2011 – 1:45 PM

To: Shelley Manning

Subject: Re: Certifiable, no?

I’m waiting for you to say you like anal.

From: Shelley Manning – May 10, 2011 – 1:47 PM

To: Renee Greene

Subject: Re: Certifiable, no?

Renee Michele Greene!  I cannot believe you just said that.  I’m floored.  You have such a dirty mind.  Where have you been hiding it and can it come out to play more often?

From: Renee Greene – May 10, 2011 – 1:49 PM

To: Shelley Manning

Subject: Re: Certifiable, no?

I guess I’ve just been spending too much time with you.

From: Renee Greene – May 11, 2011 – 12:18 AM

To: Shelley Manning

Subject: Exhaustion

I’m exhausted.  You know I love Mark.  But, this was pure insanity.  Sixteen women emailed him and he just picked them apart.  Now granted, I did ding one of them for having a ton of typos in her email.  I mean, come on.  A run on sentence is one thing, but do a basic spell check, would ya?

Even I was embarrassed for her.  But, the rest of them seemed really cute, smart, funny and nice.  He found something wrong with each and every one of them, with one exception.  He’s going to email her back today.  She’s a paralegal going to law school at night.  He liked her ambition.  Hopefully he’ll have better luck than I’ve been having.  Night! Night!

From: Shelley Manning – May 12, 2011 – 8:43 AM

To: Renee Greene

Subject: Re: Exhaustion

I’ll bet you a drink at Flint’s he finds something out about her via email or on the phone and never goes out with her.

From: Renee Greene – May 12, 2011 – 10:09 AM

To: Shelley Manning

Subject: Re: Exhaustion

You’re on!

From: Shelley Manning – May 12, 2011 – 10:10 AM

To: Renee Greene

Subject: Re: Exhaustion

Sucker!

From: Renee Greene – May 12, 2011 – 10:11 AM

To: Shelley Manning

Subject: Re: Exhaustion

Was about to say the same to you.

From: [email protected]/Patrick41782 – May 13, 2011 – 6:02 PM

To: [email protected]/PRGal1981

Subject: PR Gal Meet PR Guy!

PR Gal?  I’m a PR Guy.  Yes, I know.  Not many straight guys in PR, but here I am.  I work in-house for a large real estate conglomerate.  I have my MBA/Masters of Communications joint degree from Pepperdine and was hoping to get into development, but the only opening was in marketing.  Would love to meet up and swap stories.

From: [email protected]/PRGal1981 – May 14, 2011 –
9:26 AM

To: [email protected]/ Patrick41782

Subject: Re: PR Gal Meet PR Guy!

Hi PR Guy.  Yes, you are an anomaly.  I have a friend that got her MBA from Pepperdine.  Her name is Naomi Franklin.  Do you know her?

Well, I’ve been with a large PR firm for about 8 years, so believe me, I have stories to swap.  I’m open to meeting for a drink.  I have a client event on Wednesday.  What about Thursday?

From: [email protected]/Patrick41782 – May 14, 2011 – 10:36 AM

To: [email protected]/PRGal1981

Subject: Re: PR Gal Meet PR Guy!

Thursday is great.  Want to say 7:00? Do you know Bandanas on Wilshire? And, I don’t know Naomi.  When did she graduate?

From: [email protected]/PRGal1981 – May 14, 2011 –
11:02 AM

To: [email protected]/ Patrick41782

Subject: Re: PR Gal Meet PR Guy!

YES!  Great cole slaw.  Sounds perfect.  I’ll see you then.

p.s.  Naomi graduated in 2005.

From: Renee Greene – May 18, 2011 – 6:00 PM

To: Shelley Manning; Mark Finlay

Subject: Date with a PR Guy…Really!

Keep on file – going on a date with a PR guy named Patrick.  We’re meeting at Bandanas at 7:00 tomorrow night.  If I don’t call or email later that night – assemble the troops.  Oh, and this guy Patrick went to school at Pepperdine, but doesn’t know Naomi.  Too bad.  She always has good scoop on people.   Night! Night!

From: Renee Greene – May 19, 2011 – 8:56 PM

To: Shelley Manning; Mark Finlay

Subject: DATE FROM HELL!

Well, we can add tonight’s date to the “Dates from Hell” Hall of Fame.  It started out fine.  I got there a few minutes early to find a place at the bar and make sure the light was hitting me on my good side.  He walked in and looked exactly like his picture.  That’s always a plus.  We ordered drinks and started talking about work stuff.  Even though he works in house, we had similar experiences dealing with media and various personalities.  Everything is humming along nicely, great conversation, etc. when all of the sudden a waitress walks over and this is what transpires.

Waitress:  “Patrick, what are you doing here?”

Patrick:  “I didn’t know you were still working here.  I’m here with Renee.  Renee, this is Maggie.”

Me:  “Hi Maggie.  Nice to meet you.”

Maggie:  “What the fuck, Patrick?  You shouldn’t be here.”

Patrick:  “Really, I heard you took a job someplace else.  I didn’t know you would be here.”

Maggie: “Right.  I don’t believe you.  If you think coming in here with some skank is going to make me jealous, you’re wrong.  I want you to leave me alone.  I think you should leave…now!”

Me: “Actually, I’m going to leave.”

UGH!  Apparently, he thought being seen with me was going to make his ex jealous.  And what the  #$@%? (Excuse my language!)  A skank?  I will have you know I came straight from work.  It’s not like I showed up with some short skirt and stiletto heels.  I was wearing a pant suit, for gosh sakes.

From: Shelley Manning – May 19, 2011 – 10:07 PM

To: Renee Greene; Mark Finlay

Subject: Re: DATE FROM HELL!

:(   Lunch tomorrow at Mel’s?  I’ll wear something slutty so you look less like a skank.

From: Renee Greene – May 19, 2011 – 11:02 PM

To: Shelley Manning; Mark Finlay

Subject: Re: DATE FROM HELL!

Perfect!  See you tomorrow for a wine and whine-filled lunch.

From: Mark Finlay – May 20, 2011 – 1:14 AM

To: Shelley Manning; Renee Greene

Subject: Re: DATE FROM HELL!

Skanks and sluts?  Not sure I want to continue getting cc’d on all of these emails.  Oh hell, who I am kidding?  These are the highlight of my code-writing day.  Ha! Ha!

From: [email protected]/TaxTime2002 – May 24, 2011 – 7:03 PM

To: [email protected]/PRGal1981

Subject: Ready for some fun

Hi.  I’m Michael, an easy-going CPA and tax season is…finally…over.  I enjoy riding bikes along the beach, seeing movies, checking out the latest food trucks and watching tennis on TV.  Looking for a fun, genuine gal to hang out with and really appreciate honesty and a good sense of humor.  I’m not overly religious, but finding someone Jewish is important to me.  If you think you fit the bill, would love to meet up for dinner.  Let me know what you think.

From: [email protected]/PRGal1981 – May 25, 2011 - 10:07 AM

To: [email protected]/TaxTime2002

Subject: Re: Ready for some fun

Congratulations on surviving tax season.  I imagine that must be like running a marathon every day for a month – or more.

Looking at your profile, it seems like we do have a lot in common.  Why don’t you give me a call and we can talk more?  My number is 310.555.2187.