The Atonement (35 page)

To Allyson, it looked like Mrs. Sharpe was
getting a little emotional. Her voice got louder, her eyes were
tearing up and she was even starting to dance like she was in
church. People were starting to look over and stare at them.

“Are you okay, Mrs. Shar- uh, I mean, Mama
Lena? Would you like some water or something?”

“I don’t need no water, I
got livin’ water.
⁷
I’m sorry, baby. I don’t mean to upset you and I
don’t mean to make a scene, but when I think about how the Lord has
been good to me…Hallelujah! There’s so much more that I could tell
you, but it would take all year. I just want to let you know, God
is real and he’s faithful, and he works! Glory! You may not think
so, but I know he’s workin’ in your life, too.”

“I’m sure,” was all Allyson could say. She
was in awe of the woman’s candor. This woman was obviously not
pretending with her. Her actions and her words were in agreement.
She had never seen anything like it – ever. It made her feel afraid
and yet comforted all at the same time.

“Preach, Mother!” said a short, stout dark
complexioned woman in a white cotton shift that looked like a
housecoat.

“Praise the Lord, Mother Hardy! I’m not
preachin’ I’m testifying. You know I always have a testimony,
praise God!”

“Amen. So should we all. I know you have to
get home and have your dinner now, so I’ll take this over if you’re
ready to go.”

The woman’s words were music to Allyson’s
ears. She was free! Now she could go home and wash off all the
grease she’d attracted from this place.

“Where’s Sister Dorcas and the others?” asked
Lena.

“They’ve been in back getting’ ready for the
past ten minutes or so. They should be on their way up. You can
send the girls back,” said Mother Hardy.

“Alright. Shifts over, you can go on back,
Allyson. I’m going to get the other girls.”

Allyson couldn’t get out of her serving gear
fast enough. First the gloves came off and went into the garbage.
Then she darted for the little lounge in the back where she took
off her hair net and shook out her curly mane that had been
sticking to her scalp. Next, she took off her apron and flung it
onto the little couch and wet a paper towel at the sink to blot her
forehead. Finally, she grabbed her purse, checked the contents,
touched up her make up, grabbed her coat and headed toward the
door. The people were still coming in to get food so it was hard to
navigate around the tables and the people who were waiting on line.
She was in such a hurry to get out of the place that she didn’t
even notice when she bumped into someone coming in.

“Excuse me,” said Allyson.

“Oh, there you are,” said Tim.

“What are you doing here?”

“Bible Study just let out and I thought I’d
come to see how you were doing.”

“Too late. Shifts over and I’m on my way
home.”

“I thought you’d want to have dinner with us
at Pastor Bynum’s.”

Allyson was about to keep walking, but she
stopped when she heard the Pastor’s name.

“Isn’t dinner usually at Allen’s?”

“We alternate.”

She couldn’t pass up this opportunity to see
the how the Pastor lived. She could probably wrangle a whole
wardrobe’s worth of clothes out of her mother for this information,
but at the same time she was tired.

“I feel like I’ve been here all day!”

“If you don’t want to come…”

“No, I’ll go” she said. Her curiosity and
greed had won out. “I’ll follow you in your car.”

“Fine. This way then.”

Now the moment of truth was at hand. So what
if Mrs. Sharpe was one of Bynum’s devoted acolytes? Many of these
religious leaders had people following their doctrines while the
pastors themselves were doing quite the opposite. She knew what
Mrs. Sharpe thought of Pastor Bynum, but it was time to see if her
account was accurate or if she was merely deceived. Allyson was
trusting that it would be the latter.

Thirty-One

Jim was sitting on the couch reading his
Bible, and trying to stave off any morose matter that tried to find
its way into his thoughts. He had decided to skip Sunday dinner. He
wasn’t in the mood for conversation or for any of the advice he
knew the adults would be trying to give him. It was enough just
trying to hear what the Lord was saying. Right now he wasn’t
getting anything, and found himself reading the same passages over
and over as his mind kept wandering back to the landmine laying
dormant within him. There was no use fighting it. He couldn’t live
under the same roof with Allen and continue the charade. But how
would he deliver what he knew would be a heavy blow to his best
friend?

In the midst of Jim’s morose musings, he
heard a knock at the door. He checked his watch to see that it was
only a quarter to six. It couldn’t have been Mama Lena or Pop
Vernon because dinner had just started, and he knew Allen had
skipped Bible Study and the dinner to go to a study group for law
school.

“Who is it?” he said as he struggled over to
the door.

“It’s Callie.”

Jim thought she would’ve
been at the dinner with everyone else, but soon realized that she
probably only came for Allen’s sake. If he wasn’t there then she
wouldn’t be, either. In any event, Callie was not someone he wanted
to be bothered with. He’d said all he wanted to say to her at the
hospital and wasn’t interested in hearing anything
she
had to say.

“What do you want?” he asked through the
closed door.

“Jim, don’t be like this. We’re supposed to
be friends.”

“Supposed to be is right.”

“We need to talk…I only want to help
you.”

He had to laugh to himself about her last
remark. Jim opened the door halfway, leaving the safety on.

“And how would you do that?”

“If you let me in, I’d explain.”

Although he felt as if he were going against
his better judgment, he let her in. He was now curious as to what
she had to say. When she came in she saw him struggling and took
hold of his other side to try to help.

“I’ll help you.”

“I can do it myself,” he said pushing her
away, as he labored to get back to the couch where he was
sitting.

“Have you found a job, yet?” she asked,
sitting down opposite him.

“Why would you care?”

“I do still care about you, Jim.”

“Is that why you’re cutting me out of my
child’s life?”

“I’m not going to go there with you, Jim.
We’ve discussed that issue and we both understand that this is
what’s best for everyone involved. Yes, mistakes were made, but now
we need to think about how we’re all going to move forward. You
need to work on yourself and how you’re going to get your life
together.”

“Don’t you think I know that already?”

“You don’t seem to be acting like it. For the
past week, all you’ve been doing is sitting around moping.”

“Well it’s hard to interview when you’ve got
casts on.”

“Have you been thinking about what your
options are? What kind of jobs you’re going to apply for when the
casts eventually do come off?”

“I’m taking things day by day. I’m waiting
for God to tell me what to do.”

“Do you mind if I make a suggestion?”

“That’s why you’re here, right?”

“Listen, Jim. Everybody knows that there
aren’t a lot of opportunities here in New York. You might have to
broaden your horizons a little.”

“How’s that?”

“I’m thinking that you may want to move out
of the city. Go some place where you have a clean slate and can
start over fresh.”

“Like where?”

“How about North Carolina. You could go with
your cousin Riley when she decides to return. I’m sure the Sharpes
down there wouldn’t mind you staying with them, and they might be
able to help you get a job down there.”

“I could get a job, have some money in my
pocket. Later on, I could go to law school…”

“Exactly. I’ve heard there are some great law
schools down there.”

“Then you wouldn’t have to worry about me
ruining things for you, Allen, or Darius. Is that right?”

“This isn’t about me.”

“I’m not stupid, Callie. This is all about
you trying to protect yourself. You’ll have to excuse me if I’m not
interested.”

“You’re wrong, Jim. This is about you
protecting yourself. You should want to put space between you and
your past. The further away you are the less likely it is to catch
up with you.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I’m talking about how you ended up at that
warehouse.”

“That part of my life is over and done with.
I’m not into drugs anymore.”

“Doing or dealing?”

“What?”

“Don’t try to be cute. I know all about the
operation you were in with Smoke and Bricks and them, and how you
treated Way-lo, excuse me, I mean Chris.”

Jim tried to conceal his shock. “How did she
manage to find out about them?” he wondered.

“You’ve been talkin’ to Chris?”

“You wish. So you could go back and try to
intimidate him into silence? No, I have another more reliable
source than him.”

“So now what? You want me to make myself
scarce before you tell the others. I could tell them all about that
myself.”

“You could. But once things become common
knowledge, it won’t be long before the police start watching you.
That warehouse shooting is still an open case, and they’re going to
want to take somebody in for it.”

“They can’t if they don’t have any
proof.”

“My friend may have all the proof they
need.”

“Your friend would be a liar because I didn’t
do anything to anybody that night.”

“Maybe. But why bother to go through all of
that trouble up here when you can take it easy down south with your
family.”

“There doesn’t have to be any trouble, unless
you’re threatening to stir something up.”

“It works both ways, Jim. I don’t like to
start stuff, but if you plan to stay up here and fan my stink, you
can be damn sure I’ll fan yours right back.”

At first, Jim could hardly believe what he
was hearing come out of Callie’s mouth, but then he remembered this
was the same woman who had tricked his best friend into a
relationship, and lied to him about the paternity of her child. He
had a hard time reconciling that this was the same person he’d been
friends with in high school and who seemed so kind and self-less.
But now it seemed that was a façade. The real Callie had finally
shown up.

“So this was your real reason for coming
over, right? To try to coerce me into leaving town?”

“I came to try to show you a way out of the
mess you’re in, but instead of taking advantage of an opportunity
for yourself, it seems you’d rather cause trouble for me. I’m just
letting you know in advance that I’m willing to play nice, but if
you try to take me down, you will be going along for the ride.”

“I think it’s time for you to leave.”

“Okay, if you want to be like that. I’ve said
what I have to say. I suggest you take some time to really think
about it – for your own good.”

Callie got up and walked out of the door.
After she had gone, Jim erected himself on his crutch and hobbled
to the door to lock it. Then he leaned his back against the door.
Now his burden felt like a boulder that was sitting on top of his
chest, squeezing all of the air out of his lungs. Now on top of all
his other problems, there was the possibility of Callie trying to
get him locked up on a murder charge if he told Allen the truth.
Jim didn’t know how she got the information she did. The only
person he knew of who could provide such information was Chris, and
the fact that Callie said it wasn’t him made Jim just that more
concerned. What else could she know? “Could she know about what
happened to Rollo and Zee?” he puzzled frantically to himself. Jim
thought that after surviving the shooting, his life could only get
better, but instead it just seemed to get worse. Jim wished he
could just disappear.

“Going down South may be the best thing,
after all,” he began to consider. He couldn’t think of living with
Allen and seeing him every day and keeping this secret on his
heart. If he went down South, there would be no secret to keep, he
wouldn’t have to worry about going to jail or the person who was
leaking information to Callie. Most importantly, he wouldn’t have
to worry about hurting anybody and he could just pretend nothing
ever happened. His problems would be out of sight and out of mind.
Jim planned on talking to Riley about it the next time he saw her.
Despite Callie’s intentions her visit turned out to be helpful
after all.

Thirty-Two

Allen had just finished vacuuming the hallway
of the eighth floor and was taking the vacuum cleaner back in the
little office where they ate lunch. He was only halfway through his
shift but he was so exhausted it was taking all his strength to
drag the machine onto the elevator. Once inside, he sat on the
floor and rested his head against his knees during the brief ride
to the floor below where the office was. When he got there he saw
Davis putting on his coat to go outside for lunch.

“You going out man?” asked Allen.

“Yeah. I’m going to the deli down the block.
You want anything?” Davis replied.

“You can get me my regular: turkey and
cheese, with lettuce and tomato, and an iced tea,” he said as he
took a ten dollar bill from his wallet and handed it to Davis.

“You got it,” said Davis. Then he noticed how
drowsy Allen was. “You aiight, man? You look like you about to
drop”

“I’m okay.”

“You sure? I can get you a coffee if you need
it.”

“Nah. Just my usual. I’m good.”

“Aiight,” said Davis before heading out of
the office.