Sister's Choice (26 page)

“Like?”

“Like…like dress up and have tea parties with their dolls.” She looked befuddled, as if she had just succumbed to another gender stereotype in keeping with the entire conversation. “Of course, they might like to do that, and that would be great, right Isaac?”

Isaac looked unsure, but nodded. “Sure. Boys like dolls. The dressing up part, maybe not so much.”

Jamie was trying not to laugh. “I think we ought to have a tea party before the babies arrive, don’t you? Just us girls? And some of Alison and Hannah’s friends. We might even have a new doll or two to add to the girls’ collection, right?”

Riva had bought both Kendra and Jamie dozens of dolls when they were children, usually when she was going abroad, which was most of the time. Kendra had carefully packed and saved them, and now Jamie’s belonged to Hannah and Alison, although Jamie was doling them out a few at a time. Some of the excess had already gone to First Step families.

“When?” Hannah asked.

“Well, there should be invitations. Real ones. And we have to plan what to serve and what games to play.”

“No mud involved, right?” Kendra asked. “No mud pies? This time we dress up?”

“You can wear your best clothes,” Jamie promised Hannah. “All the girls will be little ladies, right?”

Hannah didn’t nod. Jamie could tell she was considering how possible that was.

“It’ll be a great contrast to the last party, even if nobody stays exactly clean,” Kendra said tactfully.

Grace intervened. “If it’s warm enough, I think we should have it in the orchard. We’ll still have wildflowers and maybe even some apples on the trees. With apple cake and cider. I believe I have tables that will be just the right size. And plenty of shawls to wrap up in if it’s chilly.”

“We don’t want to put you out,” Jamie said. “Wouldn’t you like us to have the party down at the cabin?”

“Oh, absolutely not. We haven’t had a tea party here since Sandra was a little girl. I can hardly wait.”

Footsteps sounded in the hallway, and Jamie’s bedroom was suddenly richer by two. Cash and his father walked in, then stopped when they saw the crowd.

“Selling tickets?” Cash asked.

“Making plans for a party.” Jamie smiled a greeting to Manning. “To what do we owe this honor?”

“My fault,” Grace said. “I asked Manning to have one of his men come look at the roof. I’m not sure it’s going to hold for another winter, even if Cash says it will.”

“I love being pitted against my son and my mother-in-law,” Manning said gruffly. “That’ll make my day.” He nodded toward Jamie. “You’re doing okay? Sandra says you are.”

“You can see all the help I have, right?”

“I’m surprised you ever get any rest.” He started to back out. “My roofing man couldn’t come today, but I’ll go look at it and see what’s what.”

“I’ll come along, if you like,” Isaac said. “I worked for a roofer during the summers when I was in college.”

Manning shrugged. “Cash, are you coming, too?”

“I’ll see you in a bit,” Cash told Jamie.

Jamie caught the know-it-all expression on her sister’s face. But even if they had been alone, she wasn’t at all sure what she would have told Kendra about Cash. She didn’t have words to explain a relationship she really didn’t understand herself.

The three men stood on Grace’s roof and examined the asphalt shingles.

“Worst mistake anybody ever made was to take off the old slate and put this mess on instead.” Manning shook his head. “I don’t know what your grandfather was thinking, but now I guess you’re right, Cash. It should make it through a year, maybe two. By the time a new one’s needed, some decisions might be made about this property.”

“You’re thinking of selling?” Isaac asked.

“Nobody wants to, but nobody wants to do all the work that’s needed just to keep the old place limping along.” Manning kicked at a shingle, and when it didn’t budge, he nodded. “I’ll back up your opinion, son. It’ll hold a while. If anything leaks, we can patch.”

Cash watched Isaac start down the ladder. He didn’t smile, but he knew what the other man was thinking. Manning was too old to be climbing up and down ladders like this, and Isaac was putting himself between Manning and the ground, just in case. Cash played along and let his father go next. There was no opportunity to assure Isaac that Manning did this half a dozen times a day and never faltered. Manning would only hang up his tool belt and clipboard when it was time to pick out a suit for his casket.

“You do right well on a ladder,” Manning told Isaac when he got down to the ground. “You take after your mother that way. Rachel was like a mountain goat. I saw her scurry up cliffs nobody else would even think of attempting, me included. Then she’d laugh at me, like I was some kind of sissy, just because I had the good sense not to follow. Are you a daredevil, too?”

“Not so much. That was a trait my father wasn’t keen on.”

“Father?”

“Adopted father. An Army colonel.”

“You think he’d
want
a bit of daredevil in a boy.”

“A kid testing his own limits takes supervision and patience.”

“I gather you’re not close?”

Cash thought that was an odd question for his father to ask Isaac. Normally Manning was as reticent as most men of his generation and upbringing. But he supposed Manning felt he owed Isaac something more, since he had been close friends with Isaac’s mother.

“Colonel Grant Taylor is incapable of feeling close to anybody,” Isaac said matter-of-factly. “Maybe it’s a job hazard, although I saw a lot of good men and good fathers in the service. Anyway, he’s not in my life anymore, and neither of us regrets it.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Before she died, my adopted mother did what she could. Considering the limitations she worked under, she did a pretty good job convincing me I could be happy someday. And she was right.”

“Sounds like you deserved better.”

“It’s funny, you don’t think much about this stuff until you’re ready to be a father yourself.” Isaac gave a small laugh. “And I’ll be the father of sons, it seems. Two of them.”

Cash clapped him on the back. “So you found out for sure? Good for you. Congratulations.”

“Man, twin boys.” Manning shook his head in wonder. “And here I thought raising one was something else.”

“I might need some tips from a man who’s been there.” Isaac kept his voice light, but his words belied his tone. “I didn’t get any from my adopted father, and I don’t know what kind of man my biological father was. I know he must have left my mother, maybe just waltzed through her life. So I’ve got two strikes working against me, I guess.”

“Oh, I don’t know. Your mother was wild in some ways, but she wasn’t the kind of woman who let no-account men into her life in the first place. Don’t make the mistake of believing that. She was as independent as they make them.” He glanced at Cash, as if he wished he weren’t there to hear this, then he went on. “I’d guess, knowing Rachel, that she didn’t tell your real father she was pregnant.”

“What makes you say so?”

“Because that’s the way she was. If she didn’t want to marry him or he couldn’t be part of her life—for whatever reason—then she wouldn’t think of telling him. She never wanted anybody’s pity or help. Did things her way and nobody else’s. Your dad, whoever he was, probably didn’t have any idea what was going on.”

“Did you ever try to trace him?” Cash asked, because like it or not, he was included in the conversation by proximity.

“Never did,” Isaac said. “Never cared. I guess I thought I knew as much about him as I needed, that he was just a man who didn’t stand by my mother. Maybe I was wrong.”

“Just guessing again,” Manning said, “but knowing Rachel—” he hesitated “—she probably never told anybody who he was. It won’t be on your birth certificate, even if you could get hold of the first one.”

“
You
don’t have any idea, do you?” Isaac asked.

“I hadn’t seen her in years before she died. We talked on the phone once. Before you were born. But not about any men in her life.”

“Long shot,” Isaac said with a sad smile. “I guess it doesn’t really matter. Like I said, it’s strange the way having sons of your own gets you thinking about things.”

“You’ll be a good dad,” Manning said. “You got everything it takes. And hell, what would I know about it, anyway? Look what I raised.” He punched Cash on the arm.

The three men walked in companionable silence back to the farmhouse.

K
endra took the girls to buy party dresses. Since she’d promised them free rein, they shopped at the local discount store to minimalize damage. Alison chose a brightly patterned pink sundress, something of a disaster with her hair, but since she insisted she was going to wear it over a lavender sweater and red leggings, pink was the least of it. Alison explained about “folk fabrics” and how since the dress had splashes of lavender and red, this was exactly the right thing to do.

“
Focus
fabric,” Hannah explained to her aunt. “Alison may be a fiber artist one day. Granny Grace says we must encourage her.”

Wisely, Kendra nodded and said not a word when Hannah chose a black jumper to be worn over a black turtleneck, black stockings and black ballerina slippers. Black
did
go well with
her
hair, even if she looked as if she was planning to attend a funeral or a Goth reunion.

The weather cooperated for an outdoor event, bringing autumn sunshine when it could just as likely have brought sleet or even snow. Grace had four card tables set up for the girls, their chaperones and their dolls, and refused to let Jamie buy paper tablecloths and napkins. She cut down and hemmed several old linen tablecloths; then she taught the girls how to fold matching napkins and slip them into sterling-silver napkin rings with the Cashel
C
engraved on each one. With the help of a guidebook, Kendra let the girls identify and pick wildflowers that were still blooming, both blue and golden asters, and purple milkwort. They plumped out the arrangements with tall grasses, made place cards for each girl and doll, and Hannah carefully wrote out one menu per table.

“I am certain there is a
K
in cucumber,” she told Kendra. “I can hear it.”

“Nope,” Kendra said.

Hannah looked up, clearly curious. “Then why don’t you spell your name with a
C?
”

“Because that’s not the way it’s spelled.”

Hannah continued listing the fare. “Cucumber sandwiches with a
C
. Egg salad…“She looked up again. “How can it be salad if there is no lettuce in it?”

“I think you’d better just write out the menus, dear,” Grace said from the next table over, where she was anchoring tablecloths by pinning fishing sinkers to each corner. “Time’s a’wasting.”

“Can we really waste time? Every minute we’re breathing and our hearts keep beating, so we’re doing something and not really wasting anything.” Hannah chewed her lip, but she kept writing. “Fruit salad.” She shook her head. “Again, no lettuce. There should be a new word. We should make one up.”

Trying not to laugh, Kendra ruffled Hannah’s hair—tied with a black ribbon, of course—and went to help Grace.

“That child will enrage a teacher or two along the way,” Grace murmured when Kendra was in earshot. “I think we might need to start a legal-defense fund while we still have time.”

“I’m assuming her father will leap right in if anything happens. From what I understand, Larry Clousell lives to keep criminals out of jail. Hannah has a safety net.”

Hannah took off to ask her mother a question, and the two women spoke louder, freed from listening ears.

“That’s what parents are for, I suppose,” Grace said. “My boys, Charlie and Adam, always knew that if things got too bad, either Ben or I would bail them out. Of course, Ben always let them go to the brink, just to scare them to death. Most of the time that worked. My daughter, on the other hand, never got remotely near the edge. She’s an organized, completely sane creature, my Sandra. I wouldn’t be certain they gave me the right baby, you know, only I gave birth to her here in the farmhouse, and there were no other babies to confuse her with.”

Kendra laughed. “I like your daughter. You two are so good for each other. I hope…” She stopped. She wasn’t sure how they had gotten into this.

“What do you hope?” Grace asked kindly. “That you and your sons will be good for each other, too? Let me reassure you. Of course you will.”

Kendra bent down and began to pin a sinker in place. “I’m not particularly talented that way. They’re bound to suspect eventually.”

“I won’t lie and say talent’s not part of parenting. Some people just seem to come into the world with untold stores of patience. Perhaps you’re not one of them?”

“No, I think I’m patient.”

“Good, because I think so, too. I’ve seen you with the girls.”

“Anyone could be patient with them. They’re exceptionally easy to be around.”

“Oh, my goodness, they aren’t, you know. Of course
we
think so, because we love them. But Hannah will drive people crazy with all her questions and observations. And Alison shows signs of being equally willful, although quite different about it. No, you’re patient because you’re patient.”

“Well, that’s a mark in my favor.” Kendra reached for another sinker and moved to the next corner.

Grace refused to let go of the subject. “So you’re patient. We’ve agreed on that. Perhaps you’re not generous? Children do take a lot of time and money and energy. And perhaps you’re worried you won’t have enough?”

“Money’s not a problem. Energy?” Kendra considered. “Maybe not as much as I’d like for twins. I’m older than I should be, going into this. But no, I probably have enough if I use it intelligently. Time? I love my job, but I can still do what I love without doing it so intensely. So I can make the time.”

“Patient and generous, then.”

Kendra gazed up at her. “I see what you’re trying to do here.”

“Me?”

“I’ve had a go at the parenting thing, you know. I was a miserable failure.”

“You’ve already had a child? I’m so sorry, I didn’t know.”

“No, I’m talking about Jamie.”

“Surely you don’t judge yourself harshly because as a child yourself you weren’t able to raise a younger child with an adult’s insight?”

“In my defense, I was woefully short on role models.”

“Your sister’s told me a little about your family.”

“It’s strange, but I came to terms with Riva—our mother—a long time ago. And now it’s all right there again. I know I’m nothing like her. That’s not it….” Kendra got up and stretched. “Why am I telling you all this? I’m boring you silly.”

“No, you’re not. But I’ll confess, if I were younger, I’d go after your mother with a shotgun.”

“It’s hard to separate the woman from the illness.”

Grace was quiet for a moment; then she asked gently, “Are you afraid you might be prone to the same sort of thing?”

“No. I’m really not. That would be pretty clear by now.”

“Jamie turned out quite well, I think. In fact, if my grandson doesn’t marry her, I’m considering adoption. Do you think she’d let me?”

Kendra felt the weight of the conversation lift from her shoulders. She managed a smile. “Only if you adopt me, as well. And two’s a lot to handle. We come with baggage.”

“You did better than you think, Kendra dear. I know you and Jamie had a rough go of things for a while. But you gave her the strength to pull her life back together. Not everyone’s able to do that, you know. In fact, I’d have to say far too few who fall so far are able to make the climb back the way she has. And where did that strength come from, if not your love and, yes, your guidance?”

Kendra made a face, but her throat was suddenly thick with unshed tears.

“Don’t look like that,” Grace said. “I know what I’m talking about. Take any success story, and you’ll find that no matter how dismal the childhood, the person who succeeded had at least one someone in her background who gave her the courage and belief in herself that she needed. You did that for Jamie when you were only a child yourself. How much better a mother will you be now that you’re a grown-up?”

“She ran away. I was
that
good.”

“She ran away. You were the anchor that stopped her and eventually helped her find her way back to the surface.”

“I’m so afraid I’ll screw up again.” Kendra met Grace’s gaze. “It’s consuming me.”

“You should talk to Jamie about this. For perspective.”

“I can’t believe I talked to
you
.”

“Oh, I can. People just do. I don’t know why, but I do know I’m glad it’s true.” She covered the few feet between them and wrapped her arms around Kendra in a quick hug.

Tea was a success. The same girls who had jumped into the mud—plus a few additions—came arrayed in party clothes, with similarly dressed dolls and their best party manners. The clothes stayed relatively clean, although the manners disintegrated by the party’s conclusion. By the time their parents were due to take them home, the girls were playing a wild game of tag among the old trees.

Jamie had been conscientious about taking a long morning rest, and now that the party was almost over, she planned an afternoon version. She’d had no recurrence of symptoms, and she felt strong and healthy. But she had to admit she also felt tired. She was glad Kendra had stayed to dismantle the tables for Grace and carry what was left of the refreshments inside.

But Kendra wasn’t alone. Cash arrived just in time to witness Alison tag Bridget and Jamie announce an end to the game.

“Okay, gang, your parents are on their way to pick you up. So let’s grab coats and anything else from the house, so you’ll be all ready when they get here. You can have one more peek at Lucky. And let’s not forget your goody bags.”

Kendra stopped stacking plates. “I’ll oversee that. You get off your feet and take a break.”

Jamie didn’t argue. Her feet and legs felt as if they were supporting several tons. She waved to Cash, then slumped into a chair and slipped off her shoes as the little girls took off for the house.

Cash came over and rested a hand casually on her shoulder. “Never having had children myself, I may need a lesson here. Are frequent parties requirements? Is there some rule about once a month?”

“This is only the second party we’ve had since we moved to Virginia. But I guess I’m raising party girls. I just can’t wait for the sleepover stage to begin.”

“The more the merrier?”

“As long as they go home eventually. I always wanted a big family, but two feels pretty big when you’re single.”

“And if you weren’t?”

Her heart skipped a beat, but she decided the question was simply a logical extension of the conversation. “Two is still plenty. I want to have the kind of home where there’s lots of room and energy, so the girls can bring their friends over and everyone feels welcome. You don’t have to give birth to children to enjoy having them in your life.”

“You look wiped.”

She closed her eyes for a moment. “My feet just hurt. This will be the last party until the twins are born. I couldn’t have done it if Kendra and Grace hadn’t handled most of the work. But everybody had a great time, including them.”

“Granny Grace was always giving parties here. Grandpa Ben used to call it the Greyhound Station, because so many people came in and out every day. So many of their friends have passed on or moved away, and my uncles live too far to visit as frequently as everybody would like. So you and your girls have really picked up the slack.”

“I’m glad. Of course, she’s done so much more for us.”

Cash knelt at her feet. Jamie felt a moment of embarrassment, since she was wearing scruffy wool socks and, under them, toenails that hadn’t seen a coat of polish since bending over to give them one had become more trouble than it was worth.

He picked up a foot and began to rotate his thumbs along her arch. “I generally ask a woman before I start to undress her. These socks ought to go.”

“You won’t like what you see.”

He stripped off the sock. “I see a foot. Long, narrow and just a bit swollen.”

He slid his thumbs back into place, and she closed her eyes, sighing with pleasure. “That’s pretty much perfect.”

“I aim to please.”

“Is that what you tell all the women you undress?”

“I can’t remember.”

“Why, because there’ve been so many?”

“No, because it’s been so long.”

She felt warmth in places he wasn’t touching, and a shiver ran up her spine. “Did you think I was asking?”

“You
were
asking. And I didn’t mind answering.” He stopped for just a moment. “How about you, Miss Jamie? Is there a man in your life with a right to ask personal questions?”

“No, there’s not.”

“So you’re not pining after either of the girls’ daddies?”

She laughed. “Oh, Lord, Cash, I certainly am not. I could have sworn I made that clear.”

“I guess I’m the one asking the personal questions now.”

She leaned down, lifted his chin and kissed him. “I’ll give you that right, if you want it.”

“I guess I’d consider that an honor.” And this time,
he
kissed
her.

“I think the party was quite a success, don’t you?” Grace asked Jamie after the girls’ guests had all gone home and Kendra had, too. Alison and Hannah were in their rooms playing Candyland, something Hannah only did when she was too tired to come up with another game to distract her little sister.

Jamie rose from the kitchen table, where she’d been finishing a glass of orange juice, and began to rummage through the cupboards. “It was perfect, and a lot of work for you. Why don’t you let me make dinner tonight? I can do pasta and sauce and a salad with one hand tied behind my back.”

“That sounds wonderful. I thought we’d have plenty of leftovers from tea, but those little girls rivaled any little boys that ever came through this house. I was sorry I didn’t roast a pig or an ox.”

Jamie shook a box of pasta shells. “We have everything we’ll need. I’ll start the sauce now.”

“You don’t feel too tired?”

“No, I’ll have a good rest once it’s simmering.”

Grace watched as Jamie assembled ingredients. Canned tomatoes, a jar of spaghetti sauce, mushrooms and peppers, onions, garlic, oregano, basil, fennel and anise seeds. The young woman loved to cook, and Grace loved letting her.

The kitchen was warm and still smelled like the cinnamon-oatmeal cookies Jamie had made for the party. Late-afternoon sunlight filtered in through the tall windows, and pooled on the tile countertops and the pine floor. The peach walls glowed under its caress.