Shocked (13 page)

I shut the door to my new space and silently promise to be back soon…as soon as possible.

This time we board a plane for our mission. It’s too loud for introductions and the only face I recognize is Lucas’. I eye the parachutes linked to chains next to a large hatch on the side of the plane and fasten my seatbelt with a little more force than necessary. Lucas shakes his head at me from the next seat.

My stomach hits my toes and I know we’re airborne. The noise dwindles to a steady annoying hum behind us. A few of the others (including Lucas) take off their seatbelts. I leave mine securely in place.

A couple hours go by. I can tell that Jase and Alex are our techs (despite their uniformed garb) and besides Lucas we have four soldiers with us, Mike, Lou, Cory and Jason. The eight of us will be flying to the outer edge of the safe zone. A couple vehicles to help us on our way sit below us in the belly of the plane. We’ll be moving by ground into the infected area.

It will be interesting to test Dr. Ford’s theory. One conversation (during my ‘resting period’ when I got back) I tell him my concern over Carch’s ability to track me through the infected area. Dr. Ford proposes the theory that if I zap the infection back around me in all directions as I go (basically throw random spheres with the ultimate goal of removing the most infection possible) then tracking me will become more difficult because the pattern will change. So I get to go nuts with energy spheres. Hopefully it’s fun
and
effective. Otherwise I’m just as much of a liability as an asset to everyone here.

At least everyone’s up-to-date so they expect it. Not that it can stop the looks of shock and awe when it happens, but it’ll be nice to skip the standard inquisition that follows.

Everyone sits down and re-buckles their seatbelts. The descent must be slight or maybe I’m finally getting comfortable flying. Either way my stomach doesn’t feel like I drop it somewhere. Until we hit some turbulence. Everything around us jolts up and down, trembling from the unseen airquake.

Please, please, please let me make it out of this metal deathtrap alive. I’ll never set foot in one again.
With more grumbles, creaks and a surprisingly large impact the plane grinds to a halt. It causes me to release a breath I don’t realize I’ve been holding.

“Oh, thank goodness.” I breathe out softly.

Lucas gives my hand a squeeze. He’s smiling, but his face’s a little pale too.

It takes me a second to fumble around with the seatbelt before it finally releases me. Ground travel has never sounded better.

My steps falter when my feet hit the dirt. I’ve never appreciated solid ground quite so much. The plane’s engine drowns out the sound of everything around us. Our team makes quick work of unloading the vehicles and supplies we’ll need. It’s never said how long this mission can take. Neither the Captain nor the Doc wants to speculate on the time it takes to go to umpteen different nuclear facilities.

The plane takes back off and it takes a while before everyone gets their hearing back. Lucas guides me to one of the two vehicles and we take off east.

“We have about a hundred miles before we’re supposed to hit the beginning of the infected area.” Lucas says.

“Then we should stop in fifty.” My voice is monotone—not really there. My mind’s a thousand miles away. It’s been two days since Mason made his confession and the hurt has grown if anything.

Lucas seems to gauge my mood and nods. He says nothing more. The landscape flies by outside my window and I turn my focus to it. I don’t really see a thing.

Besides fun with energy spheres so far this mission’s incredibly boring. Not that there needs to be anything super crazy or anything, but right now my butt hurts and the never ending barrage of scenery starts to get old.

We’ve hit two nuclear plants already and are on to the third. It’s not like my job isn’t important…it’s more that the tech people spend hours doing their thing while the rest of us wait. Way better than the alternative—don’t get me wrong. It just leaves entirely too much free time to do things like think. Thinking really sucks right now.

It bugs me that I won’t be around for Brie when she’ll need me or to hold my little honorary niece or nephew. Some things your best friend should be there for, you know?

Instead the cold damp air fogs the outer window, and seeps through the cracks, chilling me. Lucas gave up trying to cheer me up days ago. He still won’t leave my side. He just stops trying to cheer me up.

Forget sleep. It may be the perfect opportunity to catch up on it.
If
every time my eyes close I don’t have a XXX scene of Mason and some faceless girl.

Even
if
what he says is all true, how does that make any of it okay? It’s not like I give it up to Lucas because we weren’t sure that we were going to make it. Sheesh, I’ve never given it up to anyone! At this rate it may never happen. Life expectancy drops severely on the front lines of the end of the world.

I know that I have to snap out of it. Mason’s my first love. The betrayal’s something new and never experienced before. The only other person that has my faith
besides my mom is Brie.
How on earth can I trust someone like that again?

I’m upset and I need to move so I fling the door open and hop to the ground below.

“Where’re you going?” Lucas calls. He follows me around the side of the vehicle.

“Sitting’s boring, might as well patrol instead.”

“We could drive.” He sees the look on my face. “Or walk. We can definitely walk.”

He falls into step beside me and ignores the fact that I’m trying to ignore him. Maybe halfway around the site’s perimeter some of my anger begins to fade. It leaves only hurt and confusion in its wake. My feet slow with the change in my mood.

“Kat, do you want to talk about it?” Lucas offers hesitantly.

“What’s there to talk about?” The words come out laced with more hurt than I mean for them to. “Obviously I’m not worthy of commitment.”

“Come on, you know that’s not true.”

I plant my feet toward him. “Do I? How, Lucas? How do I know that’s not true? I’ve had exactly one boyfriend,” I poke at his chest vehemently, “and he lied. He told me he loved me, that I was ‘the one’ for him. Then he sleeps with some other girl the first chance it presents itself. So please, explain to me how it’s
not
true.”

Lucas takes it all like a champ. Most guys run away from such an outburst. Even more may run in terror of the power that courses through me. Not Lucas. He stands his ground and doesn’t flinch at the range of emotions in front of him. His eyes bore into mine when he replies. “It’s not you that isn’t worthy, Kat. It never was. It’s him that’s not worthy.” I shake my head no and try to look away. Lucas’ hand catches under my chin and forces me to look at him. “You’re worth everything, Kat. I don’t know why you can’t see that. It’s the most obvious thing in the world.”

Maybe it’s the look in his eyes or the sincerity as he says it. Maybe it’s just what I need to hear. Regardless of why—I crack. The tears I’ve been pushing back push through again. I crumble and Lucas catches me before I hit the ground. He sinks down with me and pulls me into his lap. “I just don’t understand.” My words are soft from my tears and gasps for air.

“Neither do I.” To my confusion Lucas chuckles. “Your ex’s kind of a dumbass.”

This elicits a much needed laugh out of me. “Yeah, he really is.” I use my sleeve and wipe at my face.

“Want me to beat him up when we get back?” He asks a little too enthusiastically.

“No.” I don’t want to see him hurt. “No, that’s okay. If I wanted to hurt him, well…”

“Yeah, I guess you wouldn’t need me.” He says. “Although my way’s more fun so let me know if you change your mind.”

“I will.” The realization hits that I’m probably crushing Lucas’ legs. I shift and he holds me in place.

“Wait. You understand, right?” He brushes a piece of hair back behind my ear. “It’s not you.”

I nod and can’t help but notice the warmth radiating from his broad chest. An internal battle wages within me. Mason’s no longer a factor. He broke that trust; that right for me to feel guilty. It makes me mad that I
do
feel guilty because part of me really wants to kiss Lucas right now.

I quickly forget my conflicting emotions when I notice a cloud of dust hovering on the horizon. Lucas sees it too and we quickly rise to our feet to get a closer look. It’s easy to tell that it’s not the infection: there’s no metallic sheen to it. Unfortunately that doesn’t mean that it’s any less dangerous. Lucas must come to the same conclusions because he grabs hold of my hand and begins to pull me towards the facility.

“You stay here.” He uses his commanding voice. My eyebrow involuntarily rises. “If it’s one of Carch’s people it’s safer for all of us if you remain unseen. Stay close and be ready—just in case—but stay out of sight.”

He’s gone before I can reply. It makes sense even if it ticks me off. I edge out of the alcove. There’s a spot next to it that offers cover from our unexpected visitors that can give me a vantage point (to make sure nobody’s going to try anything stupid that requires me to zap them.) Lucas and the team members who are outside proceed into some sort of army formation. They raise their weapons. The cloud looms closer.

The closer it gets the more distinct the shape in the cloud becomes. It’s another military vehicle which causes me to bristle. Surely if it’s one of our own they will radio ahead? Let us know…right?

The unknown vehicle comes to an abrupt stop a couple of dozen feet in front of the team. Rising up on my haunches, I make sure my hands will have a straight path to the possible intruder. The door opens and a figure steps out. It’s not until Lucas lower his weapon and begins to shout that I’m able to process who this new arrival is.

Mason. Instant relief fills me as I stand. It only lasts a moment though. The walk down towards them only gets me angrier with every step. He must leave right after us. He may not be a threat, but he’s certainly not welcome. It can’t be something wrong at the camp because Lucas or another team member checks in every two hours. He must be here for me. Mason says something while I take the last two steps towards him. I don’t hear it through my anger. Before realizing it I clench my hand into a fist and swing hard. Something in my hand pops on the contact, but it doesn’t matter. It feels good.

“What the hell!” Mason yells from his spot on the ground.

Before I can jump on him and pummel him further a strong familiar arm lifts me in the air. “Kat, stop, you don’t really want to hurt him.” Lucas’ voice cuts through in the nick of time. For a split second I open my fist and feel the energy building in my palm. I quickly squelch it. Lucas is right. This is not what I want.

The fight is gone from me now. The voice I muster is quiet and cold when I look at Mason. “Go away. You’re not welcome here.”

With that said I decide to check on the techs inside.