Sex Secrets of an American Geisha (13 page)

Read Sex Secrets of an American Geisha Online

Authors: Py Kim Conant

Tags: #Sexual Instruction, #Love & Romance, #Health & Fitness, #Social Science, #Asian American Studies, #Sex Instruction for Women, #Asian American Women - Sexual Behavior, #Family & Relationships, #Sexuality, #Asian American Women, #Self-Help, #Ethnic Studies, #Sexual Behavior, #Women's Studies

BOOK: Sex Secrets of an American Geisha
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Full Credit Phrases
Here are some phrases that implicitly or explicitly give your Good Man full credit for your orgasm (spoken either before the orgasm or after):
“Your cock (fingers, tongue) feels so good.”
“Fuck me! Harder! Deeper!”
“I love your cock (fingers, tongue) in me.”
“I love coming on your cock (fingers, tongue).”
“Oh, god, I love your cock (fingers, tongue).”
“I married you for your cock.”
“Nobody’s ever fucked me like you do.”
“I love how you fuck me. Put it in again.”
“How many fingers (in me)?”
“Don’t stop. More. Please. I need your cock.”
“You make me come so incredibly.”
“Put it in. I need your cock.” (After he excites you with his fingers and/or tongue.) “Your cock is (feels) so hard (so big, so thick).”
“Your cock sends (takes) me to heaven.”
“Your cock is too big. I can’t take any more.”
“You always make me come. I love you.”
“I come so incredibly with you.”
“I need more cock, please!”
“I’ve never felt like this with anyone else.”
“I’ve never come like I do with you.”
“I’ve never come like this before.”
“I’ve never come so hard (so many times).”
“I want you to fuck me all night.”
“I love it when you make me ‘shoot.’” (More about female ejaculation in Chapter 5.) “I’ve never screamed like that in my life.”
“Your cock (fingers, tongue) drives me crazy.”
“You fuck me so good (so nicely).”
“The vibrator’s not enough. I need your cock (fingers, tongue).”
“Your cock is so good to me.”
“Your cock (fingers, tongue) makes my vagina feel so good (excited).”
“My vagina loves your cock (fingers, tongue).”
“My clitoris loves your cock (fingers, tongue).”
“You make me such a sexual animal.”
“You’re an animal! God, I love it.”
“You make me so wet.”
“Yes, yes. I’m coming. Baby, oh, baby. . . I’m coming.” (Talk to him as you come.) “You destroy me (with orgasms).”
As a general rule, be noisy in bed. As I said a few paragraphs ago, let him know that you are really into sex with him, that you are his enthusiastic lover. Tell him how good you feel. Moan. Breathe heavily. Scream. The ver bal feedback he gets from you not only lets him know he is pleasing you mightily, but also excites him and gets him harder. And it encourages him to give you even more cock (fingers, tongue), which will drive you even crazier, until you come and make him so happy. Beyond “happy,” your feedback makes him so proud of himself, so proud of his cock. You’ve made him feel fantastic as a man
With a Vibrator, Where Does the Credit Go?
The Younger Sister in training to be an Asian Geisha is instructed that she must follow the directions of her Older Sister Asian Geisha, even when the Younger does not understand why the Older is telling her to do certain things as part of her training. I hope you have noticed that I do not take such a strong position as to give you “directions.” Rather, I offer “sugges tions.” And I try to explain why I make certain recommendations. You probably understand and agree with my reasoning for giving away credit for your orgasms to your Good Man, and to do so sincerely and with enthusi asm. Remember that your Good Man always wants to feel appreciated by you, always wants to be your hero, especially regarding your orgasm and to tal sexual satisfaction and exhaustion.
I wish now to walk a step or two further along the Path to Giving Away Credit for your orgasms. You might, Younger Sister, ask me about a situa tion involving a vibrator or other sex toy. What do I do, you might ask, if I come wonderfully hard, perhaps even female ejaculate, on my Good Man’s cock, fingers, or tongue (or the three in some combination), but added to the mix of what made me come was a fantastic little (or big) vibrator that drove my clitoris into ecstasy and, truth be told, was the proximate cause of my coming so hard and satisfyingly? Help, you might say, what should I do about credit in that case?
This is an important question because I believe that vibrators (and dil dos and other sex toys, but especially vibrators) should be on your bedside table and always well-charged and available for your lovemaking (not neces sarily always used, but frequently). You want your Good Man to be com fortable with vibrators as you incorporate them into your sex life with him. A while ago my husband suggested to me that the old saying about dia monds being a girl’s best friend was wrong, that the truth is that vibrators are a girl’s best friend. I had to agree with him that I’d give up my diamonds long before I’d part with my Pocket Rocket vibrator. You know from mas turbating alone with a vibrator how wonderful they are as sex aids to bring you stimulation and orgasm. God, they’re fantastic!
What about credit for a vibrator-triggered orgasm? My answer is short, definitive, and covers all situations: “Never give credit to the plastic (or the rubber or the metal).” Instead, of course, always give full credit for your orgasm to your Good Man and his cock, fingers, or tongue. Although the vibrator will often (even most often, I should think) be there, in use, dur ing lovemaking, it receives zero credit from you for your excitement and or gasm. “Flesh” always gets full credit; “plastic” always get zero credit. You don’t want your Good Man to feel that his cock is in competition with your vibrator. Your Good Man is your lover; the vibrator is only your (and his) friend.
I certainly don’t mean that you should lie to your Good Man, and I don’t want you to give him credit so as to manipulate him into believing falsely that his flesh caused your orgasm. Instead, I suggest that you always, as a matter of your sexual policy, focus on your Good Man’s physical organs (his flesh) as the primary causes of your excitement: his cock, his fingers, his tongue/mouth. As useful as the vibrator or other toy can be in increasing your stimulation and intensifying your orgasm, believe sincerely, enthusias tically, and consistently that it is totally the flesh of your Good Man’s body that has excited you and brought you to orgasm, even to female ejaculation. Is this a fully logical and scientific way of assessing the causes of your or gasm? Of course not. Is sex with your Good Man a fully logical and scien tific endeavor? Please answer with me, dear Younger Sister, “Of course not.” In fact, sex with your Good Man is a physical and emotional experience. I suggest you respond physically (with a fantastic orgasm) and emotionally (with expressed love and thanks to your Good Man for being the kind of person and lover who makes you come so incredibly).
Men love it when you express appreciation for anything they’ve done for you. But no appreciation is better received than the sincere appreciation you give to your Good Man for making you come so magnificently.

 

A Further Step along Your Path to
Giving Away Credit
Let’s just walk one further step along your Path to Giving Away Credit. When you masturbate alone, with or without a vibrator or other sex toy, also give your Good Man 100 percent credit for the resulting orgasm. How do you do that, since he wasn’t even there? Let’s imagine a scenario. He has driven off in his truck to a housing development two hundred miles away, where he’ll be installing cable and wiring for the next week. You are alone in the apartment you’ve shared for the last five months, ever since you became engaged, got your .78-carat diamond ring (the exact size of my engagement diamond), and set a wedding date. On your second night alone, after talk ing with him on the phone, your horny animal instincts miss his arms around you, the hair on his chest, his hard cock. So you put on some soft music, take a warm bath (watch that candle!), slip on a sexy silky some thing, apply baby oil to your clitoris, vulva, and vagina, then masturbate un til you come hard with a huge vibrator you and your Good Man call “Mister Big.”
When he calls again the next evening, somehow the conversation comes around to the fact that you masturbated the night before. I suggest to you, dear Younger Sister, that the following (or something similar) is what hap pened last night and is how you tell your Good Man about it: “I miss you so much, baby. I miss your cock in me. I got so horny for your fingers on my G-spot. I thought of us making love all day, your tongue on my clitoris. So I took a nice, warm bath and put on one of your favorite silk teddies and used Mister Big to help me. I imagined your tongue all over me and your cock pounding to the back of my vagina, your arms holding me so tightly, our lips crushed against each other’s. And I came so nicely. And then I fell asleep in heaven. Thank you, baby. I love you. Come home soon. You make me feel so good.”
Yes, even when he is not there, give him full credit for making you come. His flesh always gets full credit. It is your wonderful relationship with this incredible Good Man, his cock, his fingers, and his tongue that make you come every time you come. I believe this is emotionally true for you, even if the only physical presence was of a vibrator, not of his flesh. I want you to believe this sincerely, enthusiastically, and consistently. As well, your Good Man wants you (and him) to believe this sincerely, enthusiastically, and con sistently. When you give full credit to him (and he takes full credit), he will welcome and be happy and relaxed with the idea of incorporating vibrators into your lovemaking and with the idea of your masturbating, both when he is away and, occasionally, when he is lying there right beside you, probably touching you a little, and watching you come with your own version of Mister Big.

 

Make Him Feel Like a Hero
This chapter has dealt with one way to make your Good Man feel good as a man: by giving him full credit for all of your orgasms. Your Good Man will love you even more for any ways, sexual or nonsexual, that you make him feel good about himself. Essentially, every time you express appreciation for anything he does for you, he feels like a hero, which makes him feel good as a man. Find ways (sincerely) to make him your hero. Even taking out the trash has “hero” potential. You ask him, “Sweetheart, could you take out the trash when you have a chance, please.” Later, when you realize he’s taken the trash out, say to him, “Thank you, baby. That was so nice of you. I ap preciate it.” Now he can, and will, think of himself as just a little bit of a hero to his appreciative woman. Your Good Man wants to feel needed by you, important to you. When you let him know that he is needed and is important, he feels so good as a man.
To keep your Good Man in love with you and energized in your rela tionship, do everything in your power to express sincere appreciation fre quently to him so that you make him feel wonderful about himself. And the very best way to do that is to give away credit for your orgasm . . . to him. Make him feel better and better about himself as a man. And he’ll be so happy to see his Good Woman becoming more and more of an American Geisha.

 

 

  

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