Say Ye (21 page)

“And Lee doesn’t like that?” Did he just roll his eyes?

“Do you?” she said.

“Sure, I like…”

All kinds of women, that’s what he was going to say. She hugged her arms, then rubbed them, pretending she was cold.

“Didn’t you bring a sweater or something?”

“No. It doesn’t matter, we’re here.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to stay at home? I could--”

“I’m sure,” she said as he parked the car. “Why? Did Janetta say she doesn’t want me here?”

“No. Carlo and Sophia want you here.”

“They said that?” These people, her family, gave her so much love, it still amazed her.

“They love you like another daughter.” He sounded resigned.

Lita felt the little crease in her forehead. She smoothed the spot.

“I love them too.” She blinked, she didn’t want to cry. It had been a happy day and she and Lorenzo were going out dancing with Janetta and Pete later.

Lorenzo walked her to the door and kissed her, a gentle peck. “I’ll pick you up at nine.”

Lita swallowed, an effort, nodded, and went inside.

Right before nine, Lita twirled and modeled her dress for Janetta. Sophia and Carlo had gone out, so Janetta was the only one available. She laughed, but this time Lita didn’t feel as if she laughed at her, more like she was amused by Lita’s excitement. Lee sometimes did the same thing.

“You look great,” Janetta said. “Like a brunette Sandra Dee in one of those fifties movies my mom likes.”

“Thanks. You too, that’s a cute top.”

Janetta obviously wasn’t afraid to look sexy, with her sheer lacy blouse, red bra, and short black miniskirt. She didn’t look slutty, but when Lita tried to wear something like that, she felt too self-conscious. So much for being sultry Sophia Loren. The lyrics from the song in “Grease” blared in Lita’s head: “’Look at me, I’m Sandra Dee, lousy with virginity…’”

Lita slung her tiny black evening bag onto her shoulder when the doorbell rang. Her shoes tapped a quick beat on the hall floor. He was here. Opening the door, she stopped and stared a moment. She had no idea how he could look more handsome than he had at the wedding, in his dark suit, white shirt, and navy tie, but he did. He knew what worked for him, as it was almost a uniform: black modern loafers, dark flat-front slacks, and a dark V neck sweater, cashmere or soft merino wool.

Mush, she was a lumpy mush, warm but unpleasantly chunky. She felt ungainly and pudgy next to Lorenzo, who was sophisticated and sleek. He kissed her cheek as Janetta stood behind her, waiting.

“Ready?” he asked.

Lita nodded and walked carefully, trying not to puddle at his feet.

She lightened on the dance floor, though sometimes when Lorenzo’s eyes bored into her, the heat of him scorched her and she lost the beat of the music. Pete met them at the club and there were plenty of other distractions, though it was hard to take her eyes off Lorenzo. Still, she and Janetta had to pay attention to Pete, dragging him onto the dance floor. He’d broken up with his girlfriend in January and he was still upset. But then Lorenzo would touch her arm or waist and nothing else could claim her attention.

After over an hour, they found a table to have some drinks. She excused herself to go to the ladies’ room while Pete got their drinks.

When she returned, no one was at the table. Janetta stood nearby, in front of the hall to the back door. Lita walked over. She blinked and clutched her purse. Lorenzo kissing…Tamara. Lita put her hand over her mouth, but it didn’t stop the sour taste rising in her throat. As Lita turned, Janetta saw her and her eyebrows shot up. Lita ran and bumped into Pete.

“Take me home?” Lita said as he steadied her. She hoped she wouldn’t have to open her mouth again.

He glanced over her shoulder, nodded, and led her out.

She leaned her cheek on the cool window of Pete’s Toyota pickup truck.

“Do you want to talk?” he asked as he drove along Folsom.

Lita shook her head. Freeway ramps crisscrossed overhead, the streets grey and dark.

“If you don’t mind, I will.” Lita nodded. “I know Lorenzo can be…difficult.” A sound issued from Lita’s throat. “But I’ve known him my whole life and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. I know he isn’t all the time, but, I just thought you should know. Knowing him, he doesn’t say it, even though it’s been obvious for the last two years.”

“It has? Did he tell you?”

“Thanksgiving before last. But I knew when he took care of that guy who’d been bothering you.”

“Rich?” Lita touched her throat. “He put Rich in the hospital?” Lita lowered her voice so she wouldn’t sound surprised. She’d heard Rich had an accident before he left town.

“Sorry, I thought you knew.”

“Uh-uh.” She fiddled with the clasp on her purse.

“I guess now we know why I don’t talk much,” Pete said as he pulled up in front of Sophia and Carlo’s.

“I like talking with you, Pete. Thanks for everything.” She managed to give him a smile.

He patted her hand. “You want me to walk you up?”

“No thanks.” She opened the car door and stepped out into the cold.

“I’ll watch until you go in. See you tomorrow?”

Lita nodded and ran up the stairs. She took a deep breath before she entered the house, hoping to freeze the burning coursing through her.

“Lita, Janetta? Is that you already?” Sophia called from the living room.

“Just me,” Lita choked out. Carlo appeared at the end of the hall.

“Where’s Janetta?”

“With Lorenzo.” Whatever flimsy support propped her fell and she crumpled. Carlo caught her and half-carried her into the living room.

“What happened, sweetheart?” he said.

Sophia stood and helped Lita sit on the couch. She gasped for air as she sobbed. Sophia hugged her. Carlo’s heavy tread scuffed across the carpet. Lita glanced at him as he paced. She leaned into Sophia’s shoulder and found her handkerchief in her purse, which was still clutched in her hand. She wiped her eyes and blew her nose. Carlo sat with them.

“Can you tell us what happened?”

“He kissed…” The image flashed. She wept.

“He kissed another woman?” Carlo said. His voice held a threat. Lita nodded. “Christ. He’ll never change.”

Lita groaned.

“Carlo,” Sophia said in warning.

“Don’t,” Lita whispered. She didn’t want anyone else upset by her problems.

“Hot cocoa?” he asked.

Lita cried on Sophia, who now held her handkerchief for her. Lita couldn’t grasp anything. She felt Sophia nod. Carlo rubbed her arm and rose.

Lita tried to sip the warm chocolate he brought in, but the tears kept coming. The front door opened and Carlo trotted into the hall.

“What the hell happened?” he shouted. Lita still cried, but quietly now. “Lita says you kissed another woman, not that she could say even that much the way she’s crying.”

“I’m sorry.” Lorenzo. She thought he wasn’t an apologizer and now she wished he had nothing to apologize for.

“I thought you’d changed,” Carlo said, his voice still raised. “You’re supposed to be getting married in two months!”

“Dad,” Janetta said. “It wasn’t his fault. She was some ex of his, she was drunk.”

“Come on!” Carlo said. “Talk to Lita, huh? I hate to see her like this.”

“Hey,” Janetta said when she walked in. She hesitated and moved slowly, like she was afraid of spooking Lita.

“Well?” Sophia said.

Lita sat up a bit and took Sophia’s hand.

“Probably you didn’t notice, Lita, but that woman had been scoping Lorenzo all night. When you went to the bathroom, she came over and asked to talk to him. I followed and saw her push him against the wall and…I guess you saw it from there. He told me he didn’t want to get rough with her to shove her off. Though why he was such a dumbass as to leave our table with her in the first place--”

“Janetta!” Sophia said as Lita choked on another sob. “Thanks for that. Why don’t you send Lorenzo and your father in now.”

Lita spoke through her sobs. “Thanks…Janetta. For…watching out…for me…for us.”

Janetta nodded and rushed out. When Lita looked up again, Lorenzo stood in front of the coffee table, almost where Janetta had, but he was unmoving where Janetta had shifted uncomfortably.

“You promised you wouldn’t see her anymore.” She gripped Sophia’s hand.

“I did?”

“It was implied. Remember, after I saw you with her in December? So you’ve been seeing her?” Sophia squeezed her hand.

“No, not how you mean.”

“Now you can read my mind?”

“She consults me sometimes, strictly business.”

“Like the business meeting you had in December? It didn’t look like a business meeting, unless it was personal business.”

Carlo sat next to her and took her other hand. Support.

“Where’s Janetta?” Sophia asked.

“Went out for a drive,” Carlo said.

“Okay, you two,” Sophia said. “This arguing won’t accomplish anything. I thought you’d learned something from those classes at church. But maybe…” The worry lines around Sophia’s mouth crinkled. Lita’d tried to be open to help, but it’d been difficult when Lorenzo had to be dragged there every time and then he’d sat in silence, not participating.

Carlo faced Lita, his mouth set in a line, his eyes tender but determined. “You shouldn’t marry him, Lita.”

Lita stared at Lorenzo. He stood, rigid.

“Carlo,” Sophia said. “We made a promise to support them.”

“Do you really think the church would approve of his behavior? I don’t. Who knows what else he’s been doing.”

“You’d know,” Lorenzo said. “You watch me closely enough.”

“Someone has to.”

Sophia sighed. “Lita, do you want to talk to Lorenzo now, or tomorrow?”

Lorenzo’s eyes shone briefly, pleading, asking.

“Now,” she said.

“Carlo and I will be in the kitchen if you need us, okay?”

Lita nodded. The two rose. She hugged herself, cold and alone.

“Why?” she asked.

He shrugged as if that explained it all.

“Can you say you don’t flirt with other guys?”

“No, not that it should matter. You know I don’t even notice other guys.”

“Don’t you?” He rubbed his palm and studied his shoes.

“Maybe you’re too busy checking out other women to notice.”

“Do you believe Carlo? Because he’s wrong. I’ve been faithful to you. It’s been four months.”

“What, you want a trophy or something?”

“Something would be good.”

“I’ve given you more than I should have.”

“Says who?”

Lita hugged her knees. “No one,” she whispered. On the coffee table, the cold mug of cocoa sat on the coaster, a thin skin on top.

Lorenzo sat next to her. She leaned onto his shoulder.

“Hold me?” she said into his chest.

He put his arms around her and she sank into him. She breathed him in, his scent a vapor of forgetfulness, his strong, warm embrace a new world, a place only she and Lorenzo existed. He stroked her hair; she snuggled into him and curled her legs onto the couch. He edged back. She needed him. She held on. She believed. She believed enough for everyone. Her dream had to come true. She wouldn’t let go now.

15

Lorenzo paced the foyer at Uncle Enzo’s, waiting for Lee to arrive. He knew someone might have told Lee what happened last night and his stomach clenched at the thought of what Lee would do. Maybe he didn’t know. Lita wouldn’t tell her brother and Lee wasn’t very close to anyone else in the family. He knew Lee. To him, being unfaithful to a woman was unacceptable and his definition of cheating was much broader than Lorenzo’s. And when the woman in question was Lita…Lorenzo stopped at a knock on the front door.