Ryan's Love (24 page)

He
looked like he was hurt by what I just said. But who cares.
I
’
m the one that has a reason to be
hurt.

“
Ok
then,
”
he says then he walks back to his car and gets
in.

I
carefully slid into my car and pull off out of the hotel parking
lot. Ryan followed behind me. Which I
’
m sure he planned on
doing if I didn
’
t let him ride with
me, to make sure I didn
’
t try and
escape.

As I
was driving I was crying so hard I could barely see the road in
front of me. To try and help I rolled the windows down and turned
on the radio, as loud as I could stand. One of my favorite songs
came on. I don
’
t know if it helped
or made it worse. I cried the words to How Can You Love Me by El
DeBarge out, as I made my way to the Callahan
house.

Soon enough I was pulling up in
front of it, in my famous beater. I cut the car off. I put my head
down on the steering wheel as the last few words of the songs
played out thru the radio. When I looked up Ryan was standing
beside the car door with a sweet smile on his face. I almost smiled
back before I realized why I was here. I quickly shook myself off
and climbed out of the car.

“
Do
you need any help,
”
Ryan asked with his arms out ready to help if I needed
it?

I just looked at him then I turned
and marched to the front door. He let out a sigh as he followed
behind me.

I
opened the door and walked in without knocking. I
didn
’
t care if it was rude or not. Ryan
didn
’
t object either.

“
Ryan, did you find Sunshine,
”
I hear someone ask as
we both walk in thru the door.

I
guess the weren
’
t expecting
me.

“
Sunshine, you
’
re
here,
”
they all say surprised as we walked into the living
room.

He stood beside me and waited for me
to sit down before he would. I made him wait a few seconds before I
sat down on the couch. He sat down right next to me.

No one
said a word at first. They all sat there looking at me with sad
looks on their faces like they didn
’
t know what to say.
It was very frustrating.

“
Ryan, I
don
’
t have all day. Please say what you have to say so I
can go see Mom, then leave,
”
I say looking directly into his
face.

He
swallows hard then he says,
“
I really need you to
watch the rest of that video; then you can ask me or say anything
you want to say.
”

“
I
don
’
t think I could stomach watching anything else with
you and Rachel in it,
”
I say pointing at him and the rest of the guys;
Including my stupid brother.

“
Please,
”
he pleaded.

Just
watch the stupid video and get the heck out of here, I say to
myself. He said that he wouldn
’
t try and stop
you.

“
Where is it at?
”

“
I
sent you the video,
”
Ryan replied.

“
Fine,
”
I say as I dig thru my purse to find my
phone.

When I do I took it out and braced
myself for what I was about to see.

It
showed Rachel laughing hard and Ryan saying that it was over, could
she please call the man that had a gun on his girls at the house,
and tell them not to shoot them. Rachel laughed tossing her head
back, then saying how stupid they all were for thinking she would
really hurt mom or me. That she only wanted me to leave him; and
that if she couldn
’
t have him she was
going to make sure that I would leave him. Then it showed Ryan
cussing her out telling her how cold and disgusting she was for
doing this to him.

A few
more things were said but I really didn
’
t need to see
anymore. I heard enough to know why everything happened. So I put
my phone back in my purse and was about to get up when Ryan grabbed
my arm.

“
You
see I did it to keep them from hurting you. I
didn
’
t want to do it,
”
he said.

I looked down at his hand then back
up at him.

“
Get
your filthy hands off of me.
”

He yanked his hand back like my skin
was on fire.

“
Do
you think that that video helps with the pain I
’
m going
thru?
”

“
But
Sunshine, please you have to understand. I love
you,
”
he was begging now he reaches up and tries to pull me into
him.

“
No,
I don
’
t want you ever touching me again. I saw where you
hands have been, and I
’
m fucking
disgusted,
”
I say pushing him in his chest, making him fall back onto
the couch.

I am looming over him as I the rest
of my pent up frustrations with him, just rolled off my
tongue.

“
I
would rather have risked dying than to see what I
saw.
”

“
My
sweet baby sister, please don
’
t say that. I love
you too; and I need you here with me too,
”
my brother
says.

“
You
shut up. I wasn
’
t talking to you. I
don
’
t ever want to talk to you again.
”

“
He
’
s right, Sunshine,
”
Ryan says.

I turn to him with fire in my
eyes.

“
Shut
up. Don
’
t call me Sunshine again,
”
I say pummeling his
chest.

“
I hate you. I
hate you. I hate you,
”
I continue to scream as I am now straddling him
and smacking his chest, face, arms; where ever my hands landed; I
hit. I didn
’
t care. I wanted him
to hurt like I was hurting. He didn
’
t try and stop me
either. No one did. They knew that I was hurting, and I needed to
get all this out. Although when I did pop him in the nose, he did
grab his face.

“
I
think you should calm down,
”
Ryan said smoothing his hands down my
arms.

“
Are
you stupid? Take your hands off of me. You had those fingers in
that bitch
’
s asshole,
”
I spat.

They
all gasped at the viciousness of my words. I
didn
’
t care. My heart was racing and it felt damn good to
tell him exactly how I felt.

“
I
don
’
t think I could stomach any part of you that touched
her, ever touching me again,
”
I said with my face about two inches
from his.

He
flinched back a bit, but he stayed firm. Boy did he. I
don
’
t know what about the whole situation he could find
attractive but he did. I could feel his hardness pressing up
against my sex; and I
’
m ashamed to say that
I like it. I miss the feel of him stretching me and sliding in and
out of my throbbing wetness. I need him now. But I have to teach
him a lesson first, then I
’
m
leaving.

I reach down and begin rubbing his
hardness through his pants.

“
Please, not now,
”
Ryan said.

“
I
thought you liked someone watching you have sex,
”
I say as I continue to
rub his hardness.

“
Please, no,
”
he says and puts his hands up my
back.

I lean
into his ear and say,
“
What you don
’
t want anyone else
watching me suck this hard dick. Or watching it slide in and out of
my tight wet pussy. What about me bending over and letting someone
else
’
s dick work its way into my virgin star and pound it
until I can
’
t take it no
more.
”

“
This
is bullshit,
”
I hear James say storming out of the living room and up to
the room he was staying in; and slamming the
door.

I guess I was talking louder than I
thought I was.

Ryan
’
s looked so mad as he was picturing all the
things happen that I just described.

“
Stop, please,
”
he begged.

“
Its
not fun is it. To think about the one you love being with someone
else. Touching them like they should only be touching
you,
”
I say still rubbing him.

My finger slowly walking up his lap
and to his belt.

“
No
its not.
”

“
Well
how do you think I feel.
”

“
I
’
m sorry, Honey. Please believe me. I love
you,
”
he says.

“
Prove it. I want to get fucked exactly how she did. A dick
in every hole,
”
I say echoing her words.

I
didn
’
t want this at all but he had to see what the thought
does to me.

His two brothers began coughing;
fighting for a good breath.

“
Over
my dead body,
”
Ryan shouts, his whole body is trembling as he tries
to control his anger.

“
You
seem to like to share with your brothers. Why not share
me.
”

“
Because I love you, and no one is touching or seeing your
body except me,
”
Ryan says.

“
Oh
really,
”
I reply.

“
Yes,
”
he answers.

“
Ok,
”
I say then I reach over and my hand lands in his brother
Killian
’
s lap.

“
Ryan, what is she doing? Get her,
”
he pleads as I grip his
dick thru his pants.

Ryan
snatches me back firmly on his lap and says,
“
Are you crazy woman?
Don
’
t ever touch another man again.
”

Damn near every vain in his face was
popping out thru his skin.

“
It
doesn
’
t feel good does it,
”
I scream at him.

I now have two handfuls of his hair
and am shaking his head as I yell.

“
No,
”
he says.

“
I
really hate you right now. You just don
’
t know how
fucking used and stupid I feel right now. Not only have you jumped
out of bed with me to be with that woman, I had to see you hugged
up with her more than once. You fake cheated with her once, and now
you, your brothers, and my brother have a good old time fucking her
five ways to sunday. How am I supposed to feel,
”
I yell.

“
I
’
m sorry. Please let me make it up up you.
Please,
”
Ryan
says.

“
No.
I gave you too many chances already. Why should I give you another
chance to twist the knife that
’
s already in my
back.
”